FabSwingers.com forum: intoduce an expert

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

with so many veried topics of discussion on her and quite a few differing opinions, does anyone want to introduce themselves as qualified in any particular field that could make them an expert, or at least being capable of a feasible answer?? (no bragging or namedrops)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am an eggspurt in poofreading

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am an eggspurt in poofreading

was it a 1 day internet course lol

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I am an expert on chocolate. My bona fides have been posted on this very forum many times. I specifically cite the chocolate week threads: 125666 and 211682.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck Hall

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Fuck Hall"

The award winning book?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have an encyclopedic knowledge of pointless information. The stuff you don;t need to remember, I remember

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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

Not that great, but my skills are as follows:

I am an experienced pissartist.

Also well versed in 'walking the walk and not talking the talk'

SixSigma Audit leader (Please God, don't ask)

GirlieBiker (the kind with an engine) bodge jobs a speciality

Can make a bong/pipe out of anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck Hall

The award winning book?

Haven't a clue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am an eggspurt in poofreading

was it a 1 day internet course lol

I graduated with Dr. Gillian McKeith PhD (Poo)

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

think there is in the loft a rather dated certificate for swimming or something..?

does that count..?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cycling expert also an expert in visual merchandising

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I'm an expert in STUFF (Just ask Lickety) and certain aspects of computing. I could maybe also be considered an expert in some science/maths subjects.

I'm also knowledgable on some subjects.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves.

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

scottish charity law

grant funding for charity groups.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Fuck Hall"

A posh swinging club.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I studied law...only to get on the wrong side of it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Expect in Subbing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm an expert in whatever I happen to be talking about at the time. I have been told this is quite annoying, but I think that's just jealousy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im an expert in running in heels and remaining ladylike at the same time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm an expert in whatever I happen to be talking about at the time. I have been told this is quite annoying, but I think that's just jealousy.

"
sounds all to familiar

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

im an expert at my job,i got a certificate an everything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

PhD in advanced masturbatory techniques, Doctorate in lounging about scratching oneself, MSc in crisp butty making and in my spare time I scatter pages of pornographic magazines into hedges for pubescent boys to find. It's a dying tradition but one that I feel must be kept alive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well of course just being me

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a expert at making and decorating cakes amongst lost of other things of course

Paul's a expert at being "the boss"

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I know more and more about less and less and pretty soon I will know everything about nothing!!

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By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford

Expert in procrastination. The art is in finding stupid things to idle away the time with.

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By *atinbootsTV/TS
over a year ago

Market Rasen

The most intelligent people understand that they *know* nothing....

(...of course, I didn't know that!)

[ok so it's a shameless rip off from the Alpen ad on Dave at present]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Expert armchair football manager. I'd have gotten England out of the group stages, at least.

But then so could any other fucking moron not called Woy Hodgson.

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By *xpresMan
over a year ago

Elland

IM an expert at driving..

passed 5 different driving tests. Im the driving assessor at work, my particular forte' is fuel saving and defensive driving. I have driven everything from a 50cc moped upto heavy haulage you can add long wide and over hight too, with Tanks and heavy recovery my CV is rather full

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Expert armchair football manager. I'd have gotten England out of the group stages, at least.

But then so could any other fucking moron not called Woy Hodgson."

If he only had one leg would you call him limpy Hodgson ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm Certified

Gimp

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Expert in procrastination. The art is in finding stupid things to idle away the time with.

The forum is perfect for that, she says as she puts off writing her report.

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By *or Fox SakeCouple
over a year ago

Thornaby

I'm fairly up to speed with Byzantine military history and can waffle with some authority about dark ages armies

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves."

What if there are no shelves available?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 11/07/14 09:57:05]

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves.

What if there are no shelves available?"

She's good a shelf making too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I clarify, do I need knowledge of a topic to consider myself an expert?

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves."

One of my favourite things to do!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can I clarify, do I need knowledge of a topic to consider myself an expert?

"
its never held me back lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves.

One of my favourite things to do!"

I colour coordinate mine, it's pleasing on the eye but makes it impossible to find anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm also an expert in organising CDs, DVDs and books on shelves.

One of my favourite things to do!

I colour coordinate mine, it's pleasing on the eye but makes it impossible to find anything. "

What sort of anarchy do you surround yourself with? How the hell do you live a regular life with a colour coordinated DVD shelf? Absolutely bloody mad!

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By *avantmaleMan
over a year ago

Havant

The more I drink the more authorative I become, on any subject

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Qualified data specialist and auditor, time served floor layer and well practiced cunnylinguist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm an expert layer too

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By *octor DeleriumMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

Car mechanics and carpet laying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The sea, firearms and wildlife. Oh and I'm a closet vintage aeroplane spotter.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

" The sea, firearms and wildlife. Oh and I'm a closet vintage aeroplane spotter."

How do you spot aeroplanes from a closet?

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

I'm an expert at scaring people off site.

Had a message today from a single guys profile but the blurb was about a couple. Pointed this out and was told he had a gf now but didn't know how to change to MF. Told him id reported it for him so admin could change it and POOF....UNLOS x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Expert flapjack and shortbread maker.. Apparently I'm good with my hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am a professional perv dose that count ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" The sea, firearms and wildlife. Oh and I'm a closet vintage aeroplane spotter.

How do you spot aeroplanes from a closet?

I am embarrassed about my love of aeroplanes. You can place a closet anywhere and people pay no attention. A small hole in the door will suffice.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I'm an expert in vodka and other stuff

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

I know way too much about science fiction and fantasy books. Quite handy with obscure indie and new kraut/psychedelic music. Yes I'm a keeper ladies...

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By *picyspiregirlCouple
over a year ago

chesterfield

I don't want to blow my own trumpet but, so I'm told, my samosas and parathas are quite good. Does that count?

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"I know way too much about science fiction and fantasy books. Quite handy with obscure indie and new kraut/psychedelic music. Yes I'm a keeper ladies..."

Bloody hell, switch the kraut/psychedelia with doom folk and you may be the male me!

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By *irimusMan
over a year ago

Burnley

Valve amplifiers.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Valve amplifiers."

Aw! You kept your name Sad Fat Cat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clockwork mechanisms for others.

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By *irimusMan
over a year ago

Burnley

"Valve amplifiers.

Aw! You kept your name Sad Fat Cat."

You remembered me! I haven't got round to changing it yet... still thinking up the perfect name...

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

"I know way too much about science fiction and fantasy books. Quite handy with obscure indie and new kraut/psychedelic music. Yes I'm a keeper ladies...

Bloody hell, switch the kraut/psychedelia with doom folk and you may be the male me!

I'll meet you half way with Espers. Doom folk psychedelia. If you drink proper beer we're gender switched clones...

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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"I know way too much about science fiction and fantasy books. Quite handy with obscure indie and new kraut/psychedelic music. Yes I'm a keeper ladies...

Bloody hell, switch the kraut/psychedelia with doom folk and you may be the male me!

I'll meet you half way with Espers. Doom folk psychedelia. If you drink proper beer we're gender switched clones..."

I like Belgian, Trappist dark malty, fruit ones and the occasional wheat beer. And British micro-brewery super hoppy IPA type buggers if that counts as proper beer?

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

Used to be an expert sub/slave but given it up such is life.

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

im just a KNOW ALL

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By *ingersnthumbsMan
over a year ago

London

"I studied law...only to get on the wrong side of it

That one made me giggle

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

"I know way too much about science fiction and fantasy books. Quite handy with obscure indie and new kraut/psychedelic music. Yes I'm a keeper ladies...

Bloody hell, switch the kraut/psychedelia with doom folk and you may be the male me!

I'll meet you half way with Espers. Doom folk psychedelia. If you drink proper beer we're gender switched clones...

I like Belgian, Trappist dark malty, fruit ones and the occasional wheat beer. And British micro-brewery super hoppy IPA type buggers if that counts as proper beer?"

Ive met my match how cool. You're down south and like younger men, how uncool.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

5.5yrs training x 35 yrs experience x lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm an expert in being a professional sportsman. 18 years!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"PhD in advanced masturbatory techniques, Doctorate in lounging about scratching oneself, MSc in crisp butty making and in my spare time I scatter pages of pornographic magazines into hedges for pubescent boys to find. It's a dying tradition but one that I feel must be kept alive."

Love it, only the other day my hubbie was bemoaning the fact that kids these days just find their porn online rather than a mud spattered copy of Fiesta stashed in a nook in the woods or indeed as you have mentioned strewn amongst the hedgerows

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm good at maffs n fisiks innit for mi job as a geek

I also have a reasonable knowledge of the works of Dali and Gaudi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ii have a pizzaology

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"im just a KNOW ALL

You lot sink I know fok nozik..!!!

Vell... I know fok ALL...!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't want to blow my own trumpet but, so I'm told, my samosas and parathas are quite good. Does that count?"

Most definitely mehm sahib.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am an ex-pat. Close enough?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am also an expert on experts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Expert...

Ex= Has been...

Spurt = Drip, under pressure...

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