FabSwingers.com forum: Changing jobs

By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

I am finally leaving my place of work next friday and just had a thought that maybe people would have opinions on my reasons why.

My boss is a total bully to all the managers except myself as he knows i would bite back if he tried it with me.

My reason for leaving is that everyone is depressed as they seem to get bollocking after bollocking all day long(sometimes deserved) as second in command i have tried to stick up for them but they wont get behind me to help me stick up for them when he is wrong so i have decided to leave and let them either resign or stand up for themselves.

So what do folks think, should i have stayed and tried to defend them even tho i was totally stressed out or leave and be happy.

Steve

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"I am finally leaving my place of work next friday and just had a thought that maybe people would have opinions on my reasons why.

My boss is a total bully to all the managers except myself as he knows i would bite back if he tried it with me.

So what do folks think, should i have stayed and tried to defend them even tho i was totally stressed out or leave and be happy.

Steve "

IMO, you've done the best, and the right, thing. Hope it works out well for you, both.

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

if your not happy, get out

if you are in a position to do it

some dont have the choice and have to stick at it no matter what life chucks at them

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

You have to be happy in your work, given how long you spend there.

Sounds like you've made the right decision.

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

you did right Steve have to be happy in your work.

I started a new job recently (well last October time flies) and although closely related to what I have done in the past it's completely different and I'm enjoying every minute of it.

Best of luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get out while u can !!! ive been very lucky i have skills that allow me to be self employed...so no bully bosses for me but i wouldnt put up with one either ....

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Go for it Steve, being happy in your job is so important.

I was in a great job with fantastic pay but the stress was killing me, walking away was the best thing I have ever done.

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By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

The job i am going to is almost identical to the job i am doing now the only differance is i will be able to hand pick my own team of managers so that will be good.

And to be honest not 1 of my present co-workers will be getting a call as they are to be honest not the best in the world but after i got landed with them i did really think i could have knocked them into shape but not with this loon above me battering them all the time.

Maybe its just our different styles of management thats the problem as i like to have happy willing folks working for me.

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The job i am going to is almost identical to the job i am doing now the only differance is i will be able to hand pick my own team of managers so that will be good.

Maybe its just our different styles of management thats the problem as i like to have happy willing folks working for me.

Steve "

good luck in your new job,

You have done the right thing looks like your co workers didn't apreciate what you where trying to do for them anyway !! so it's there loss.

Pity you couldn't have given your boss a bit of a going away pressie !! if ya get my drift lol

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By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

"The job i am going to is almost identical to the job i am doing now the only differance is i will be able to hand pick my own team of managers so that will be good.

Maybe its just our different styles of management thats the problem as i like to have happy willing folks working for me.

Steve

good luck in your new job,

You have done the right thing looks like your co workers didn't apreciate what you where trying to do for them anyway !! so it's there loss.

Pity you couldn't have given your boss a bit of a going away pressie !! if ya get my drift lol

Hell got a full 7 days left to work so plenty of time but to be honest the best pressie i could leave is a backbone for the managers to share lol

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The job i am going to is almost identical to the job i am doing now the only differance is i will be able to hand pick my own team of managers so that will be good.

Maybe its just our different styles of management thats the problem as i like to have happy willing folks working for me.

Steve

good luck in your new job,

You have done the right thing looks like your co workers didn't apreciate what you where trying to do for them anyway !! so it's there loss.

Pity you couldn't have given your boss a bit of a going away pressie !! if ya get my drift lol

Hell got a full 7 days left to work so plenty of time but to be honest the best pressie i could leave is a backbone for the managers to share lol

Steve "
Have to say it is annoying when peeps without back bones want you to do all the talking, negotiating etc but when the going gets tough they all melt away, ooh dont see many of those around here do you (wide mouthed frogs).

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"Steve Have to say it is annoying when peeps without back bones want you to do all the talking, negotiating etc but when the going gets tough they all melt away"

Maybe, just maybe, they melt away through fear and intimidation

Steve, you can't be the spoke-person for everyone, you must do what is right for YOU.

Some people are intimidated by bully's, and no amount of “Stand up for yourself speech” will take away the intimidation some feel.

Presently, we have an employment climate where a great many manager's / bully's have no idea how to manage, this results in a bullying / intimidation environment.

No one can say whether it's right or wrong changing employer's, however, once the decision is made, stick with it, and never look back, nothing worse than “I wish I blah, blah, blah”

Good luck Steve

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By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

The move is all set in place and will happen and i know the move is right for me the question was more a case of should i have stayed and helped the guys i managed to beat this control obsessed boss or leave and let them fight alone although i have seen no fight from thus far.

Steve

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

You are doing the right thing, as I am sure you know. The shame is that a bully should be placed in a position of power, however that seems to happen in many industries, I believe it is another of the less savory US corporate management imports.

Guess I'm lucky in my line of work as I never have the problem of bullies, maybe thats because we all literally put our lives on the line and in the hands of our colleagues every time we go to work and that seems to foster mutual respect, co-operation and professionalism.

Good luck in your new position.

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

good luck.hope it works out.

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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

From quickly glancing through this thread, I reckon that

a) you`ve done the right thing by leaving

b) your current boss hasn`t a clue and you should tell him why you`re leaving

c) if you had a decent boss, he`d have the skills to DEVELOP his staff and out the ones who`re rubbish.

I`m sure that if my boss kept on at me, I wouldn`t pull my weight/do my best/whatever if all I got is shit from him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely the right thing to do for your own sanity, you can only go so far but then give up to protect yourself so good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if your not happy, get out

if you are in a position to do it

some dont have the choice and have to stick at it no matter what life chucks at them"

Must admit i work part time in a pub as well as a full time job, id love to leave it but i cant afford to and the problem is that the boss changes the goalposts all the time, no continuity, poor training but if you get it wrong, you get a bollocking??? She then decided that as one of the staff is a trainer in her present job, she could train new staff, ummm she works in insurance and totally different to a pub and was rubbish at it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you identified a problem, the bullying, tried to resolve it but due to entrenched culture did not achieve quite what you set out without compromising your own happiness. I dont think anybody can blame you for leaving people to fend for themselves now and perhaps that recognition alone will make them stand up more for themselves.

You tried and hats off for that.

Best of luck x

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By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

Wooooooo leaving thursday now so its aint gonna be long now lol

Steve

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By *ethot69Couple
over a year ago

Merseyside

"I am finally leaving my place of work next friday and just had a thought that maybe people would have opinions on my reasons why.

My boss is a total bully to all the managers except myself as he knows i would bite back if he tried it with me.

So what do folks think, should i have stayed and tried to defend them even tho i was totally stressed out or leave and be happy.

Steve "

Highly sympathise with this.

I worked for a government agency - my boss (who was a woman) was a complete tool. Nasty to absolutely everyone. Utterly horrible.

In the end I just binned it. There's only so much anyone should do just for the sake of money. Self-respect is more important.

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By *oe_Steve_NWest OP Couple
over a year ago

Bolton

Woooooo thats me outta this job and away from Liverpool

Bring on the new job Monday in sunny Manchester lol

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Woooooo thats me outta this job and away from Liverpool

Bring on the new job Monday in sunny Manchester lol

Steve

enjoy your new job and surroundingsxxx sounds like you made the right decision.that was something my father always drummed into me.whatever job you cloose make sure you enjoy it...he worked his ass off 20 years at a job he hated and in the end the laid him off(I guess made him redundant as said here) and then screwed him over...so be happy

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By *prite128Woman
over a year ago

maidstone

"Woooooo thats me outta this job and away from Liverpool

Bring on the new job Monday in sunny Manchester lol

Steve

good luck steve ...i hope you'll be really happy in the new job xx

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