FabSwingers.com forum: Bestest EVER EVER !!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus .....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh P.S .....

What's YOUR bestest EVER EVER first message........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyone had the "lets play soldiers game i lie down you blow me" one? x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

mine has to be the 'wow you're so hot/sexy' one's.....when i have no pic on my profile....i feel like i'm being watched

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah some really make us chuckle...they must go to creative writing classes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bang you all day? my arm would get very tired after about 10 minutes, not to mention the pain of impact on my knuckles, they'd blister up I'm sure, doesnt sound very pleasurable anyway. good job your not a door then

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By *nkednkinky_bbwWoman
over a year ago

cannock

"anyone had the "lets play soldiers game i lie down you blow me" one? x

yup, a few times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus ..... "

Tell him to go and buy a drum if he wants to bang something.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"anyone had the "lets play soldiers game i lie down you blow me" one? x

yes! just recently...same guy??!

...was you blow the hell out of me...hmm, reaches for semtex

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"bang you all day? my arm would get very tired after about 10 minutes, not to mention the pain of impact on my knuckles, they'd blister up I'm sure, doesnt sound very pleasurable anyway. good job your not a door then

Some people come nearer to a plank than a door

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think he just see's who is online and sends that message!! i suppose its a bit more creative than the fancy a fuck ones!! x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus .....

Tell him to go and buy a drum if he wants to bang something.

Ha! Where were you when I needed back up .....eh eh ?? xx

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I should save the classic ones as ive had a few

but today I got......

"Im off today"

I thought oh thats nice for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I should save the classic ones as ive had a few

but today I got......

"Im off today"

I thought oh thats nice for you"

i got one of them before, my reply was "we're out of milk, be a good lad" haha

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

"anyone had the "lets play soldiers game i lie down you blow me" one? x

Oh yes...I had that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus .....

Tell him to go and buy a drum if he wants to bang something.

Ha! Where were you when I needed back up .....eh eh ?? xx"

Well he hasn't mailed me yet lol

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

todays prize in terms of my inbox goes to.....

"can we cum over pics of Jodie Marsh I love her false tits and she makes me horny if that's okay?"

WTF

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"todays prize in terms of my inbox goes to.....

"can we cum over pics of Jodie Marsh I love her false tits and she makes me horny if that's okay?"

WTF

classic there pet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my best one was playing titani ,,when i shout iceburge ,you go down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had one that just said, you could be lucky !

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"todays prize in terms of my inbox goes to.....

"can we cum over pics of Jodie Marsh I love her false tits and she makes me horny if that's okay?"

WTF

I had that one yesterday, so he obviously not cum yet, aw bless

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

""Im off today"

"I know, I can smell you from here"

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

crikey too many gems to mention - just had 'ello ow r u 2day?

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

ohh and one ages ago - ran along the lines of ' our kids are having a party tonight - if you play your cards right we'll stay at yours?' nope! Z

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"crikey too many gems to mention - just had 'ello ow r u 2day?

argh! i hate the text ones....saving their time and wasting mine! i cant decipher all that shite in one easy chunk!

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

"crikey too many gems to mention - just had 'ello ow r u 2day?

argh! i hate the text ones....saving their time and wasting mine! i cant decipher all that shite in one easy chunk!"

lol - i know - love the delete button! Z

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By *ouple1234Couple
over a year ago

BELFAST UK

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus ..... "

name and shame the cheese man he needs alot of advice if he thinks your knickers will drop off using lines like that lol

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

sorry but think i had the winner sent to me ..this is copy of the first message he sent...

u ever fot about being a porn star bb am casting for my new movie if your up for it get intuch xx

nope this isnt a joke ,it was actually sent to me !!!

how i resisted the temption to message back with my mobby number and arrange to meet up right away ill never know !! i must be frigid i guess lol !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"sorry but think i had the winner sent to me ..this is copy of the first message he sent...

u ever fot about being a porn star bb am casting for my new movie if your up for it get intuch xx

nope this isnt a joke ,it was actually sent to me !!!

how i resisted the temption to message back with my mobby number and arrange to meet up right away ill never know !! i must be frigid i guess lol !!!!"

Takes the proverbial biscuit lol

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

i sure get em !!!! this is a first contact message fromlast nite

4ft 11,jesus youll be popular in this world !!

guy seemed shocked someone wouldnt be over the moon getting that message lol ! i asked what he ment ( knowing full well )and was told was just a comment and never ment anything by it.when i said was strange comment and ppl generally talked to a person like they would face to face i was laughed at and met with the immortal line " but its a swing site!"

but hey obviously as theyve been on the site under 24hrs theyll know far more than me about what ppl exspect on here lol !!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i got one on a different site saying

'fat girls suck cock good but smell funny when you 69 'em'

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

ooohhh and another

'i;d still like to bone the fuck out of you'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i sure get em !!!! this is a first contact message fromlast nite

4ft 11,jesus youll be popular in this world !!

but hey obviously as theyve been on the site under 24hrs theyll know far more than me about what ppl exspect on here lol !!

Four foot elven yea there is a god xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus ..... "

So I take it is just me who found that funny?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a mail telling me I looked fit for my age and did I want to do some professional wrestling?

fekk I'm only a few years off brittle bones!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)"

Usually I get asked to be XYZ hotel while they go and play/watch golf

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By *ickmealloverWoman
over a year ago

a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus ..... "

grossed out here

I would block him

flippin awful

what happened to good manners and decorum

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

"i sure get em !!!! this is a first contact message fromlast nite

4ft 11,jesus youll be popular in this world !!

but hey obviously as theyve been on the site under 24hrs theyll know far more than me about what ppl exspect on here lol !!

Four foot elven yea there is a god xx

hehe !!! yes almost 5ft of pure attitude !! hehe xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Usually I get asked to be XYZ hotel while they go and play/watch golf

That is...errr... ummm.... I am not sure lol what that is. Depends if they asking for room service also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Usually I get asked to be XYZ hotel while they go and play/watch golf

That is...errr... ummm.... I am not sure lol what that is. Depends if they asking for room service also

Some want a room a service and breakfast!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Usually I get asked to be XYZ hotel while they go and play/watch golf

That is...errr... ummm.... I am not sure lol what that is. Depends if they asking for room service also

Some want a room a service and breakfast!

So apart from being allowed to look at their Big Bertha or their 7 ... what do you get out of that?

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Usually I get asked to be XYZ hotel while they go and play/watch golf

That is...errr... ummm.... I am not sure lol what that is. Depends if they asking for room service also

Some want a room a service and breakfast!

lol just go and while their out playing golf raid the mini bar and then leave lol !!!

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)"

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

"underdeveloped vocabulary"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

"underdeveloped vocabulary""

and insufficient appreciation of goods

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

"underdeveloped vocabulary"

and insufficient appreciation of goods

Will he now complain of a no reply??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

"underdeveloped vocabulary"

and insufficient appreciation of goods

Will he now complain of a no reply??

Well, he might not have enough words for that as Sharpdressed said - so you might have to teach him first

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"I simply love the one liner email "am staying in hotel XYZ tonight"

???;-)

Well, I've just received this, as a full message...

'nice body'

hmmm now how do I respond to that???

"underdeveloped vocabulary"

and insufficient appreciation of goods

Will he now complain of a no reply??

Well, he might not have enough words for that as Sharpdressed said - so you might have to teach him first

For some reason I think I will give that a miss

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Just recieved this as a first contact message......

' I wish you were a door ......... so I could bang you all day long.'

THAT ..... ( despite being a losing pile of shite ) wins the best line ever! When ever I think the contacts from here can't sink any lower... someone sinks to an all time ...... Jesus .....

So I take it is just me who found that funny?

I am guessing thats a yes then

I took it as a man trying a different tack to the normal mails..and tried to have a joke instead.

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