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"You can't blame me for trying"

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Can't you?

When can you? If ever.

For example, applying for a job you're not quite qualified for, trying to chat up someone you think is out of your league, trying to break up a relationship...

When can't you blame someone for trying and when are they taking the piss?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/06/14 07:59:50]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the basis that nobody gets anywhere unless they try, then you can't blame anyone for trying! 

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends if they're trying to achieve something wholly inappropriate and distasteful.

We can't control how we feel but we can control our action's.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"On the basis that nobody gets anywhere unless they try, then you can't blame anyone for trying!  "

How about when you clearly don't meet the stated criteria. Say, applying for a job advertised as needing a degree, experience and a professional qualification when you have none of those?

Isn't that taking the piss and wasting other people's time?

How about lying on a c.v. to get a job?

Offering 50% or 20% or some stupid fraction of the asking price on a house, or anything else, that's for sale?

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"On the basis that nobody gets anywhere unless they try, then you can't blame anyone for trying!  "

Does this excuse or justify any behaviour anyone might use when trying to get something?

Trying to cheat in an exam? Trying to get petrol without paying? Trying to take things from a shop without paying?

"I wanted it and I couldn't afford it so you can't blame me for trying"?

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

People go to all lengths to get what they want...some feel guilty some don't...as the saying goes you don't have friends in business..sometimes life is very cut throat and some will trample on you when they are getting want they want...however they will pass you on the way down.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"People go to all lengths to get what they want...some feel guilty some don't...as the saying goes you don't have friends in business..sometimes life is very cut throat and some will trample on you when they are getting want they want...however they will pass you on the way down. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have many good virtues but sometimes they cant be measured x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trying's good. Shows motivation. Motivation is good.

People attaining the impossible, striving for something better are the ones who develop us as a people.

Everyone's got a (or should have) a goal or a dream. To try for it is the definition of our existence?? Surely?

You can't blame someone for that?

Just my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You cant blame me for trying" is an oxymoron, semantically ambiguous and a [partial] truism.

The person who typically utters the phrase is the one who is 'trying' for a particular outcome or decision - therefore is the person for whom the 'blame' [responsibility, guilt, accountability, liability, onus, blameworthiness, culpability, fault] lies with in terms of culpability. The truism and the oxymoron.

However, the concept of blame implies that there is, at the heart of it, a fault or a wrong an that is very much subjective given what the person 'trying' is attempting - the semantic ambiguity. If a person were trying to negotiate the reduction in a purchase price, this would not be morally or legally wrong unless coercion were used [for example]. Cheating on an exam is morally [and potentially legally] wrong, therefore there is 'blame' [in the strictest sense of the word].

A better phrase I've found is 'nothing ventured, nothing gained' where there is no 'fault' or 'wrongdoing' involved - such as trying to chat up the lady whom all your mates think is 'way above your station'.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Trying's good. Shows motivation. Motivation is good.

People attaining the impossible, striving for something better are the ones who develop us as a people.

Everyone's got a (or should have) a goal or a dream. To try for it is the definition of our existence?? Surely?

You can't blame someone for that?

Just my opinion "

So absolutely anything is acceptable in the pursuit of a goal?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The job I do (and love) I was definitely chancing my arm when I applied for ir. I was, by my mangers admission the strongest application but on paper the weakest shortlisted candidate. You have to take chances

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By *etitmortCouple
over a year ago

ipswich


"The job I do (and love) I was definitely chancing my arm when I applied for ir. I was, by my mangers admission the strongest application but on paper the weakest shortlisted candidate. You have to take chances

"

There you are! I've known people with qualifications and bits of paper coming out of

Their ears and they can't bloody do the job.

If it ain't illegal you can't blame them for trying. As for morality , well that's a matter of personal opinion.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

You can when you get someone miles away and totally unsuitable for reasons of service in the Boer War who wants a meet and whilst not being anywhere near offensive enough to block does send too many messages.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"You can when you get someone miles away and totally unsuitable for reasons of service in the Boer War who wants a meet and whilst not being anywhere near offensive enough to block does send too many messages. "

Now be specific please Tina!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends on the other person. If I see a gorgeous hunk and think no harm in trying.. and he thinks I'm an ugly old hag, he might be pissed off and abusive to me for asking. Or he might think I'm an ugly old hag but still take it as a compliment and say thank you.

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By *ivilizedkinkCouple
over a year ago

harrow

If hurts some innocent person in the process of achieving a goal for purely selfish gain .then you can blame them for trying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On the basis that nobody gets anywhere unless they try, then you can't blame anyone for trying! 

How about when you clearly don't meet the stated criteria. Say, applying for a job advertised as needing a degree, experience and a professional qualification when you have none of those?

Isn't that taking the piss and wasting other people's time?

How about lying on a c.v. to get a job?

Offering 50% or 20% or some stupid fraction of the asking price on a house, or anything else, that's for sale?"

While currently still studying at uni i have been applying for jobs which require a professional qualification of which inam studying for, i always look at the salary they are offering before applying. If its high i know they are picky if its low then what do they expect they arent offering enough for fully qualified personel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've got to be in it to win it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/06/14 11:47:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Trying's good. Shows motivation. Motivation is good.

People attaining the impossible, striving for something better are the ones who develop us as a people.

Everyone's got a (or should have) a goal or a dream. To try for it is the definition of our existence?? Surely?

You can't blame someone for that?

Just my opinion

So absolutely anything is acceptable in the pursuit of a goal?"

Within the realms of the usual parameters. Yes why not?

What's the point in living if you're not trying to achieve something?

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By *arnayguyMan
over a year ago

Durham Tees

I am High Court Judge. You can't blame me for trying...it's my job.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

If I'm messaged by someone who clearly does not match my preferences who uses that excuse to spam my inbox I often think - yes I fucking can. YOU messaged me even AFTER reading my profile and seeing you didn't match what I wanted.

What I actually write is - no thanks.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"If I'm messaged by someone who clearly does not match my preferences who uses that excuse to spam my inbox I often think - yes I fucking can. YOU messaged me even AFTER reading my profile and seeing you didn't match what I wanted.

What I actually write is - no thanks. "

Good point. It's pretty easy to deal with on here at least.

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By *ee Viante OP   Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

The situation that inspired the question was someone lying in order to try to avoid taking responsibility for something they'd done.

When caught out, they said they knew they'd be in serious trouble and we couldn't blame them for trying to get out of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Providing something isn't immoral, illegal or just damn right insulting then why not try.

Sometimes we have to push our luck to end up with a positive outcome, if you don't try then you'll never know!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The situation that inspired the question was someone lying in order to try to avoid taking responsibility for something they'd done.

When caught out, they said they knew they'd be in serious trouble and we couldn't blame them for trying to get out of it."

I guess you can't blame someone for trying to get out of trouble as in their eyes it's the best thing for them. I was brought up and live by honesty being the best policy and no matter how much trouble that'll get you into telling lies will be worse. Besides which my memory is shite and I have enough problems remembering actual events without trying to remember what I said and who to.

I think trying is good so long as it's not illegal or going to hurt anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The situation that inspired the question was someone lying in order to try to avoid taking responsibility for something they'd done.

When caught out, they said they knew they'd be in serious trouble and we couldn't blame them for trying to get out of it."

That's different then! It's not what I thought you were talking about to begin with.

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