FabSwingers.com forum: Preened and impeccable or rough and ready?

By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I've read so many profiles demanding men turn up impeccably presented, which is fine if that refers to their bodily appearance and hygiene - but dictating sartorial this, that or the other is another thing.

Believe it or not, there are some of us here who don't spend half our day preening ourselves in front of a mirror and who have better things to spend our time and hard earned on than aftershave, hair gel, shoe polish and dry cleaning suits. Sure, I could waste my money on these things but I refuse to kowtow to overly materialistic expectations - especially since it's the person and their character who matters - not what latest fashionable shite they happen to be wearing that day.

I suppose you could pigeon hole us as being a little "rough and ready", which is fine as long as it's not taken to imply we don't know how to wash our hair or clean our teeth.

Let's be honest, wearing an Armani suit or a pair of Prada heels doesn't stop you being a dirty raddled bastard if you don't how to wash or you like a cream pie off every Tom, Dick and Harry you barely know over your perfectly polished car bonnet every Friday night - and they certainly won't stop you being a complete tosser if that's what you are.

Well, by the same token, it's perfectly possible to be as clean as a whistle, smell gorgeous, have a fantastic body and an engaging personality whilst wearing a pair of worn jeans and a scruffy jumper as long as they're clean.

Seriously, am I the only one here who prefers women to turn up wearing scruffy jeans, dirty boots and a torn jumper?..

.. or is it just me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A scruffy jumper that's clean ? eh!....

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"A scruffy jumper that's clean ? eh!....

Yes indeed - I have many!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having clean shoes, or clothes without holes shouldn't be seen as looking preened - I think most people would expect that to be a given.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A scruffy jumper that's clean ? eh!....

Yes indeed - I have many!

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I assume if you're attached it's kind of hard to leave the house preened up anyway huh?

I for one do not mind what a man is wearing as long as it's all clean. I'd actually far rather a nice pair of jeans than a boring suit, and any man that meets me regularly is gonna get me in a pair of jods sooner or later!

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Having clean shoes, or clothes without holes shouldn't be seen as looking preened - I think most people would expect that to be a given."

You'll be telling us it's normal to eat quiche next!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Having clean shoes, or clothes without holes shouldn't be seen as looking preened - I think most people would expect that to be a given.

You'll be telling us it's normal to eat quiche next!

With the correct quiche cutlery, of course

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"I assume if you're attached it's kind of hard to leave the house preened up anyway huh?

No, not really - it's not like I have a lock that won't open unless I look like Swampy. I'm free to leave my house looking any way I like... and I agree, jods are fine.

It's expectation to the exclusion of all else I'm talking about - it's just nice to be ourselves sometimes, without having to worry about what kind of facade we need to erect in order just to be met.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It all depends what you class has preened., if we are going out on a meet or just on the town I will polish my shoes iron my clothes and do the best hubbm to look well presented, I wouldn't dream of wearing jeans with holes in or tatty clothes, my clothes aren't super designer clothes but they are nice clothes, so if expensive clothes make you preened then I'm never going to be,

But you will never see me clean shaven I hate it I get a really bad rash, so my stubble is kept nice and meat and tidy and my hair is gelled but messed up, so I suppose you could say physically speaking I work hard to look unkempt

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

No, not really - it's not like I have a lock that won't open unless I look like Swampy. I'm free to leave my house looking any way I like... and I agree, jods are fine.

It's expectation to the exclusion of all else I'm talking about - it's just nice to be ourselves sometimes, without having to worry about what kind of facade we need to erect in order just to be met.

I can relate - I even mention it on my profile. Yes I have stockings and heels but sometimes I do get bored with being asked to wear them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Since when did caring about your appearance become "materialistic"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I accept people at simply the best they can do.

Clean and tidy, that's all I would ask.

Her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have my own thing that lies somewhere between the two.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It all depends what you class has preened., if we are going out on a meet or just on the town I will polish my shoes iron my clothes and do the best hubbm to look well presented, I wouldn't dream of wearing jeans with holes in or tatty clothes, my clothes aren't super designer clothes but they are nice clothes, so if expensive clothes make you preened then I'm never going to be,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a date once and he turned up n looked ok if a little casual trakis

Wen I sat down with him for a coffee I realised his fingernails were black he hadnt shaved, brushed his teeth nor had he used deodrant never mind aftershave then spent 10mins how he never left the house without doing his hair ffs

so I can understand why woman list wot thy expect. Its not until someone doesnt dress appropriately that u think of it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

turned up to a lasses house recently on my way home from a festival...muddy clothes the lot =) not what i normally do but we got on great, made good friends and continue to be so....the state of my clothes made no difference whatsoever...

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"turned up to a lasses house recently on my way home from a festival...muddy clothes the lot =) not what i normally do but we got on great, made good friends and continue to be so....the state of my clothes made no difference whatsoever..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont like scruffy men, you dont have to spend a lot of money to look tidy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am mainly suited and booted and always clean shaven. and down stairs man scapped

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my gran used to say - dont let anybody look down on you so long as what you have is clean and paid for

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

. .i dip my cock in detol and off we go. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

". .i dip my cock in detol and off we go. X"

just had a random flashback to music lessons at school - jar of something we used to dip the recorders in - made me shudder

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

We both put effort in and expect it back in return! If i'm decorating or gardening then yeap its me old clothes and sloppy jo jumpers ... Not when we are out at clubs / parties tho!!! Soap n water, smartness and self pride cost fuck all but some effort and self worth! If others couldn't be bothered then frankly they aint for us .

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

". .i dip my cock in detol and off we go. X

just had a random flashback to music lessons at school - jar of something we used to dip the recorders in - made me shudder "
i lied for comedy effect. . . . .i actually use jeyes fluid, saves on aftershave

x x X

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

"Since when did caring about your appearance become "materialistic"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But it's such a pain having to change out of my work clothes. Do you know how complicated it is to get in and out of this God damn Batsuit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it wierd that anyone sees spending money on cleaning their shoes and cloths as a waste of money, i quite like the rough and ready guy but one who is clean and smells nice, for me rough and ready don't mean scruffy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've read so many profiles demanding men turn up impeccably presented, which is fine if that refers to their bodily appearance and hygiene - but dictating sartorial this, that or the other is another thing.

I suppose you could pigeon hole us as being a little "rough and ready", which is fine as long as it's not taken to imply we don't know how to wash our hair or clean our teeth.

Seriously, am I the only one here who prefers women to turn up wearing scruffy jeans, dirty boots and a torn jumper?..

.. or is it just me?

We would get on so well!! I'm assuming you still like a woman to bathe daily and clean her teeth twice a day though??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that's different, if i met a guy straight from a festival i would understand he will ne dirty, i have been to many i know what they are like, but if i met a guy coming from home and he turned dirty i would leave, i always turn up to meets clean and i expect the same in return

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"We would get on so well!! I'm assuming you still like a woman to bathe daily and clean her teeth twice a day though??"

Yes indeed.

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I must say, it's odd that so many here appear to have missed my point... who think that wearing a pair of worn jeans and a scruffy jumper means you're dirty - that this means, somehow, you don't know how to wash your face or clean your teeth.

Sure, we all like people we meet to be clean, that's rather as read. However, the gist of my point was appearance rather than cleanliness, on the practicality and aesthetics of wearing boots rather than high heels, worn jeans rather than smart slacks, fluffy jumpers rather than dry cleaned suits.

Maybe they ought to read the OP again, particularly the "clean as a whistle" bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We would get on so well!! I'm assuming you still like a woman to bathe daily and clean her teeth twice a day though??

Yes indeed.

Just checking

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Something else to consider is that many of us will meet you at a public venue. There may well be certain standards that are expected there, or we may hold a certain public office that would cause our profiles to be somewhat undermined if we are trying to get a table as a mismatched group. Camera lenses are often everywhere these days, and having someone who looks like tracy emins bed trying to finger you under the table is not something we all wish to relish when it is circulated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that's different, if i met a guy straight from a festival i would understand hpe will ne dirty, i have been to many i know what they are like, but if i met a guy coming from home and he turned dirty i would leave, i always turn up to meets clean and i expect the same in return "

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

To be fair she was extremely understanding as she knew where I was coming from....she washed my clothes and bunged me in the shower before feeding me a lovely roast dinner bless her....was a most unusual fab meet to be honest.....

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find it wierd that anyone sees spending money on cleaning their shoes and cloths as a waste of money, i quite like the rough and ready guy but one who is clean and smells nice, for me rough and ready don't mean scruffy

This for me you don't have to be head to toe in Armani just clean, tidy and smelling nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes...."
was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!"

Didn't mind at all, I nu where Ud been for a week! Ur company was well worth it.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wear what I fancy wearing and hope the person(s) I'm meeting would do the same. If I was going somewhere where dress code is important I'd wear something appropriate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must say, it's odd that so many here appear to have missed my point... who think that wearing a pair of worn jeans and a scruffy jumper means you're dirty - that this means, somehow, you don't know how to wash your face or clean your teeth.

Contradicting yourself a lot here mate. You says that worn jeans and scruffy doesn't mean dirty, yet your original posts states that anyone who looks after themselves, dresses well or cleans their shoes as materialistic and "preened"

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!

Didn't mind at all, I nu where Ud been for a week! Ur company was well worth it.x"

For gods sake, get a room you two - oh wait, you already did... alright then.

Sort of underlines my point about how much more important things like friendship and acceptance are over the more common expectations of appearance though - so what if someone's a little unkempt here and there, or prefers to wear scruffy jeans and fluffy jumpers... doesn't make a jot of difference in the shower.

Personally, I should prefer to be judged by a woman when she has me tied to the bed and is sitting on me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!

Didn't mind at all, I nu where Ud been for a week! Ur company was well worth it.x"

your some woman...enjoying the company of a muddy blithering idiot like me lol...must say...your outside the norm, and that's no bad thing =) thank you a billion for looking after me =) xxx

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

No not really - go back and read it again more carefully this time. If you're still finding it difficult, I'd be happy to repost it for you using smaller words and simpler ideas.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like a man to have clean,ironed clothes. I don't like tracksuits or trainers at all. I do like a slightly dishevelled look though,especially tousled hair. But my favourite is smart casual fresh from the shower. Smelling laundry fresh and sparkly

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"I like a man to have clean,ironed clothes. I don't like tracksuits or trainers at all. I do like a slightly dishevelled look though,especially tousled hair. But my favourite is smart casual fresh from the shower. Smelling laundry fresh and sparkly "

Damn, I don't have an iron - still have a little hair though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/05/14 17:24:01]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!

Didn't mind at all, I nu where Ud been for a week! Ur company was well worth it.x

For gods sake, get a room you two - oh wait, you already did... alright then.

Personally, I should prefer to be judged by a woman when she has me tied to the bed and is sitting on me.

it's not the wrapper that counts =)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Damn, I don't have an iron - still have a little hair though.

you can flatten clothes by putting them under your mattress. But not if you have slats

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Personally, I should prefer to be judged by a woman when she has me tied to the bed and is sitting on me.

it's not the wrapper that counts =)"

D'ya know, I could've saved myself so much time and effort if I'd just written that as the OP in the first place.

Damn, I don't have an iron - still have a little hair though.

you can flatten clothes by putting them under your mattress. But not if you have slats "

Damn - I have slats too.

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By *ittyticklerCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

It's not about "preened" or designer labels, anyhow. I think it's tacky to have your labels on the outside of your clothes anyway, like the dreaded Superdry.

It's looking like you've made an effort for someone, that's all. That you (I imagine as a newbie) "care" for all of the hour or two that you may be meeting for.

I wouldn't want to shag a chap who looked like you could smell his knob through his kecks.

I want to go to my husbands office when he is suited and booted (which isn't often, so is quite a novelty for me)and have my way with him on his twirly office chair. He won't let me though, because his colleagues would know I was there and why he wasn't answering knocks on his door.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know exactly what your saying

as I say, its not the norm for me to turn up all covered in mud and sunburned lol..

Guess I was just trying to say that it doesent truly matter how you turn up, if there's a good excuse anyhow lol.....

... But the very best of meets, by the sound of it - full of friendship, understanding and generosity and devoid of superficial judgment.

You lucky man!

Oh it was.....I think we shall remain friends

was a bloody good laugh as it goes.... was great, n looking forward to next meet, xx

lol, I promise not to be muddy this time or to make you do my washing or to need to throw me in the shower!! your some kind of angel I tell ya!!

Didn't mind at all, I nu where Ud been for a week! Ur company was well worth it.x

For gods sake, get a room you two - oh wait, you already did... alright then.

Personally, I should prefer to be judged by a woman when she has me tied to the bed and is sitting on me.

it's not the wrapper that counts =)"
certainly isn't!

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By *ittyticklerCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

It's not about "preened" or designer labels, anyhow. I think it's tacky to have your labels on the outside of your clothes anyway, like the dreaded Superdry.

It's looking like you've made an effort for someone, that's all. That you (I imagine as a newbie) "care" for all of the hour or two that you may be meeting for.

I wouldn't want to shag a chap who looked like you could smell his knob through his kecks.

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"... am I the only one here who prefers women to turn up wearing scruffy jeans, dirty boots and a torn jumper?..

.. or is it just me?

.. so, it's just me, Banana Cake, Christos and Fruitiloop then, eh?

Anyone else?...

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Rough and ready. Impeccable personal hygiene.

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By *opinov OP Man
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Rough and ready. Impeccable personal hygiene."

Precisely.

For some reason, too many others seem to think they're mutually exclusive.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Rough and ready. Impeccable personal hygiene.

Precisely.

For some reason, too many others seem to think they're mutually exclusive."
More fool them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I smell a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I smell a bit.

Out of shower gel?

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By *untimeanytimeMan
over a year ago

kings lynn

I remember not too long ago going out an spending a fortune on ripped jeans an tops with holes in and even dirty looking jeans. Obviously we all wash an clean up thats just goes without saying. Why dress up like a penguin in a suit if I had to do that id be punching above my weight. Smart casual all the way

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