FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Open Fab Auditions

Jump to newest
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I am auditioning acts to perform at the social on June 28th at Jaydees. See http://www.fabswingers.com/forum/events/271567#message_5110697

We need some classy entertainment. What can you do?

Are you coming to the social and can offer us a turn? Want to come and need a good excuse? Want to sing and dance in front of a mostly sexy audience?

Present your act here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

I can't carry a tune in a bucket, my party piece is underwater BJs...not sure if there'd be any call for that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I can't carry a tune in a bucket, my party piece is underwater BJs...not sure if there'd be any call for that "

I think that can be arranged. What skills do you bring to this task and how many can you manage?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A Bangkok Ping pong ball spectacular classy enough?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"A Bangkok Ping pong ball spectacular classy enough? "

Oh yes, that should go down well. Can you aim the ball into someone's mouth for added effect?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"I can't carry a tune in a bucket, my party piece is underwater BJs...not sure if there'd be any call for that

I think that can be arranged. What skills do you bring to this task and how many can you manage?

"

Silky smooth mouth and tongue and line 'em up, I'll stop when I get to the end...

Oh, I am planning on accessorising my hair with my outfit (silver) so it may leave a bit of a sheen in the jacuzzi/pool...I'd better make sure I double wash it beforehand

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I can't carry a tune in a bucket, my party piece is underwater BJs...not sure if there'd be any call for that

I think that can be arranged. What skills do you bring to this task and how many can you manage?

Silky smooth mouth and tongue and line 'em up, I'll stop when I get to the end...

Oh, I am planning on accessorising my hair with my outfit (silver) so it may leave a bit of a sheen in the jacuzzi/pool...I'd better make sure I double wash it beforehand "

I'll find out what the water situation is and we can bill you as the Slippery Silver Sea Siren.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"I can't carry a tune in a bucket, my party piece is underwater BJs...not sure if there'd be any call for that

I think that can be arranged. What skills do you bring to this task and how many can you manage?

Silky smooth mouth and tongue and line 'em up, I'll stop when I get to the end...

Oh, I am planning on accessorising my hair with my outfit (silver) so it may leave a bit of a sheen in the jacuzzi/pool...I'd better make sure I double wash it beforehand

I'll find out what the water situation is and we can bill you as the Slippery Silver Sea Siren.

"

Ooh, I feel a name change coming on for June

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I can't sing for toffee

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I can't sing for toffee "

Could you do the dance of the seven veils? Extreme dart throwing? A session on how to accessorise leopard print?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Talentless, I'm afraid

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Talentless, I'm afraid "

Dance of the seven Trilbys.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got a long and massive tongue.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Talentless, I'm afraid "

I doubt it Tina, can you have a motor-boating kiosk pleaaaaase

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"Talentless, I'm afraid

I doubt it Tina, can you have a motor-boating kiosk pleaaaaase "

Have you got private medical insurance or do you not like your nose?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I got a long and massive tongue.

"

Yes, but what's the act?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/05/14 18:36:30]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got a long and massive tongue.

Yes, but what's the act?

"

I can do a Noah's ark with it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Need a DJ ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Need a DJ ?"

I don't know. The club may already have one but if not then that could be very handy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I got a long and massive tongue.

Yes, but what's the act?

I can do a Noah's ark with it.

"

You have animals two by two on your tongue?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"Talentless, I'm afraid

I doubt it Tina, can you have a motor-boating kiosk pleaaaaase

Have you got private medical insurance or do you not like your nose? "

User error!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Talentless, I'm afraid

I doubt it Tina, can you have a motor-boating kiosk pleaaaaase

Have you got private medical insurance or do you not like your nose?

User error! "

Insurance and a stubby nose

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp "

What sort of clowning? One of these modern ones or the old fashioned sort?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got a long and massive tongue.

Yes, but what's the act?

I can do a Noah's ark with it.

You have animals two by two on your tongue? "

I was thinking more of saving one from the floods.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant come, will be to busy in the gym lol x.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Hove, mainly…

I shan't be going but If anyone wants to play my rusty trombone, they are welcome

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp

What sort of clowning? One of these modern ones or the old fashioned sort?"

I'm hoping it's the custard down the trousers type

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I cant come, will be to busy in the gym lol x."

All that time in the gym does stop some men from cumming.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I shan't be going but If anyone wants to play my rusty trombone, they are welcome "

I'd be worried about tetanus. All acts must be risk assessed.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Hove, mainly…


"I shan't be going but If anyone wants to play my rusty trombone, they are welcome

I'd be worried about tetanus. All acts must be risk assessed.

"

Oh

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I might tell a few jokes and try to be humorous

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp

What sort of clowning? One of these modern ones or the old fashioned sort?"

Strictly old skool type, big red nose, permanent manic grin and oversized feet

Coco

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I might tell a few jokes and try to be humorous "

I thought you said try to be humoous. Now that is talent.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

What I'm really looking for is a bit of burlesque to live music. A comedy act (I know some of you are capable of that) and then a singalong to end.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp

What sort of clowning? One of these modern ones or the old fashioned sort?

Strictly old skool type, big red nose, permanent manic grin and oversized feet

Coco "

That's you before you dress up and start clowning so what's the act?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would like to audition as the resident Clown

Ive been certified

Gimp

What sort of clowning? One of these modern ones or the old fashioned sort?

Strictly old skool type, big red nose, permanent manic grin and oversized feet

Coco

That's you before you dress up and start clowning so what's the act?

"

Know what ? If i had feelings i could be upset but luckily i dont.

Gimp

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's got to be some talent on fab

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a fire eating act which involves extinguishing a couple of Swan Vesta matches. Vegas wasn't interested so might be my big chance?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

or maybe this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jM0HVeQMcqs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're asking swingers if they would like to perform on a stage??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ub_from_kentMan
over a year ago

maidstone

I know some hypnosis

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

id ge tup n sing 'i touch myself'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You're asking swingers if they would like to perform on a stage?? "

I'm not sure the club has a stage

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush


"id get up n sing and touch myself "

Kinky!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"id get up n sing and touch myself

Kinky!"

lol id sing it to you ryan if you wore that costume in the avatar

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush


"id get up n sing and touch myself

Kinky!

lol id sing it to you ryan if you wore that costume in the avatar "

If I wore that we could both touch ourselves

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

So far I have signed Tina Titz and her lovely assistant Gemma as a comedy turn.

There's a potential DJ.

A clown.

Cute n Sassy singing while Ryan touches himself.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I shall be busy getting material

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I shall be busy getting material "

Observational comedy can be so cruel... and delicious.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can spin plates on my nipples

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I can spin plates on my nipples "

Are you coming to the social? If not why not? Get your plate spinning nipples along.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could throw a Steel Panther tribute band together. Their music would be perfect for a gathering of swingers, with songs like Bukakke Tears, Gloryhole and Weenie Ride.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I could throw a Steel Panther tribute band together. Their music would be perfect for a gathering of swingers, with songs like Bukakke Tears, Gloryhole and Weenie Ride."

Go for it. It sounds perfect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *icketysplits OP   Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Day 2 of auditions for the day time participants.

Come on, present us your talents.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top