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Joke

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Am just board in work dose anybody have any good jokes I can steal to tell my work colleagues to brighten the day up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Your rubbish you lot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your rubbish you lot "

Whats brown and stick?

A STICK!!!!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Am just board in work dose anybody have any good jokes I can steal to tell my work colleagues to brighten the day up "

A blind man walks into a bar. Says ' ouch'

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By *anny PepperoniMan
over a year ago

Matlock


"Am just board in work dose anybody have any good jokes I can steal to tell my work colleagues to brighten the day up

A blind man walks into a bar. Says ' ouch' "

A dyslexic guy walks into a bra....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its the religious dyslexic insomniac i feel sorry for.

Sitting up all night wondering if there is a dog.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A couple in bed wife says to hubby "you make love to me like you decorate" he says "slow and professional" she says " no I have to finish the job myself "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd just like to thank my English teacher for defining the word 'Many' for me.

It means a lot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I asked the librarian if he had the new book about erectile dysfunction.

He tapped his keyboard, and peered at the screen. "It's not coming up", he frowned.

I said "That's the one."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ejaculate: The ejection of semen.

Or...

A yorkshire person telling Jack he's not on time.

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By *urvywelshCouple
over a year ago

Everywhere and nowhere baby

What is the definition of Trust?

Two cannibals giving each other a blow job.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone knows about them 200 nigerian girls that have been abducted! America has sent there top secret service to search for them! Anyway britain has sent rolf harris, garry glitter and freddie star.. and to top it off kevin!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you make a Pirate angry?

Take the P out of him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

They taste funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Following the death of Peaches Geldof, Police sources say that Poppers E's and Whiz were found in the house.

Her other sisters were out shopping

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By *urvywelshCouple
over a year ago

Everywhere and nowhere baby

A cannibal returned from a holiday missing a leg.

"What happened?" asked his friend.

"It was self catering." he replied.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

Prostitute goes to the Dr. He tells her " your pregnant... Do you know who the father is"?

She replys " what?!!! If i ate a can of baked beans, would I know which one made me fart?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do u call a guy that wears paper trousers ?

....... Russell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you call a man with a spade on his head?

Weird.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I asked the librarian if he had the new book about erectile dysfunction.

He tapped his keyboard, and peered at the screen. "It's not coming up", he frowned.

I said "That's the one."

"

i went to the same library and asked 'do you have a book on not becoming violent to deal with rejection?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are blondes useless at robbing banks?

Because they tie up the saves and blow the guards!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A guy walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey.

The barman pours his drink and puts it on the bar.

The guy takes up his drink and downs it in one.

"thanks, give me another one"

The barman pours him another double whiskey and the guy once again, downs it one.

"same again" says the guy.

"sure" says the barman. "well, I guess that you must be celebrating something big then?"

"Yep" says the guy, downing his 3rd drink in one. "I am celebrating my first blow job"

"that is a good reason to celebrate" says the barman "but how many whiskeys do you want?"

"Better give me another one" says the guy "I still can't get the taste out of my mouth!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you call pastman pat at the.. dole ? Pat.

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By *homasP80Man
over a year ago

Linwood


"What do you call a man with a spade on his head?

Weird. "

Q - What do you call a man with a car on his head?

A - Jack

Q - Why are there no pills in the jungle

A - because parrots-eat-em-all (paracetamol)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Lol some quality jokes people quality

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What did the green grape say to the red grape ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What did the green grape say to the red grape ?? "

Give us a clue ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What did the green grape say to the red grape ??

Give us a clue ? "

nope it was

breathe u bugger breathe

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What did the green grape say to the red grape ??

Give us a clue ?

nope it was

breathe u bugger breathe "

Lol bloody quality

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Russell

what do you call the same man later? Pete

what do you call a man with a rabbit up his arse? Warren

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By *urvywelshCouple
over a year ago

Everywhere and nowhere baby

Guy goes into a bar, orders a double whiskey, downs it in one. Orders another, downs it in one. Orders another, barman says ' you're knocking them back quickly aren't you?'

Guy knocks back his third double and says 'you'd drink them quickly if you had what I've got',

'Why? What have you got? Asks barman

'38p !' Says the guy, running out the door.

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Russell

what do you call the same man '10 years' later? Pete

what do you call a man with a rabbit up his arse? Warren"

edit: would help if I could type the full punchline

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By *ev-PMan
over a year ago

Hampshire

My mate always uses big words that he doesn't understand the meaning.

Still...it does make him sound more photosynthesis.

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