FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

so, gentleman

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

if you were given the opportunity to judge a 'best boobs' contest, what criteria would you judge by? ....and what technique would you employ in said judging considering that you are doing so blindfolded?

having recently experienced this phenomenon for the first time, I'm wondering if the 'judge' did a proper job of it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills


"if you were given the opportunity to judge a 'best boobs' contest, what criteria would you judge by? ....and what technique would you employ in said judging considering that you are doing so blindfolded?

having recently experienced this phenomenon for the first time, I'm wondering if the 'judge' did a proper job of it "

Taste, was on the tip of my tongue

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"if you were given the opportunity to judge a 'best boobs' contest, what criteria would you judge by? ....and what technique would you employ in said judging considering that you are doing so blindfolded?

having recently experienced this phenomenon for the first time, I'm wondering if the 'judge' did a proper job of it

Taste, was on the tip of my tongue "

shock! horror! outrage!

the judge didn't taste! silly man.

then again, considering what was awaiting him at the end of the line, that may have been pretty smart

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Taste touch smell smoothness

Even size

Disqualification for implants

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

should probably state this was a .....mostly.... clothed boobs scenario. lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There should be different disciplines. I have know some boobs unable to support their own weight which were far superior to some firm perky ones.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a man, but appreciate a good tit, so I would say "weight" xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There should be different disciplines. I have know some boobs unable to support their own weight which were far superior to some firm perky ones. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

and what techniques would you use to judge boobs, on bras,lined up for you while you are blindfolded?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills


"and what techniques would you use to judge boobs, on bras,lined up for you while you are blindfolded?"

Windscreen technique

Just love the noise as they kiss both sides of the windscreen

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"and what techniques would you use to judge boobs, on bras,lined up for you while you are blindfolded?"

Thats cheating. You may as well say who has the best fitting bra. Or am i taking this too seriously? (Apologies if i am )

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would not give a knack . I lovvvveeeess tits

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"and what techniques would you use to judge boobs, on bras,lined up for you while you are blindfolded?

Thats cheating. You may as well say who has the best fitting bra. Or am i taking this too seriously? (Apologies if i am )"

it was in a pub, though a couple of people bared themselves nonetheless. the judge did get a little creative with his gro....erm....judging technique, though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would not give a knack . I lovvvveeeess tits "

now tosh, you have to award a prize to one lady. so how would you choose. I'm quite curious here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts


"

Disqualification for implants "

Yoicks!

Size, feel, weight, texture

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

I could immerse myself in this......

The contour of the nipple?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would not give a knack . I lovvvveeeess tits

now tosh, you have to award a prize to one lady. so how would you choose. I'm quite curious here. "

Would have to spend a long time deliberating

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm beginning to wonder if the fab ladies in hull should demand a recount

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would not give a knack . I lovvvveeeess tits

now tosh, you have to award a prize to one lady. so how would you choose. I'm quite curious here. Would have to spend a long time deliberating "

lol! i imagine you would! he tried, but he was moved along the line by the hostess lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not a gentleman but I still love boobs...

Its shape, weight, suckable nipples and taste for me mmmmmmmmm

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands "

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. "

I would probably of been open to blackmail

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail "

i will remember that should you be a future judge. lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail "

I know you are

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Entering on a stage wire I'd slip my cock between each pair of breasts and judge depth of penetration to workout diameter using some simple calculus.

I would also use this technique to judge gloveliness. The ability of the breasts to fit round a cock like a glove during a tit wank or fuck.

Then upside down hanging I would test the boobs for jiggliness giving them the two handed jiggle test.

Then using the pen grip I would test the nipples for width, length and erectility (the arousability of a nipple from rest to bullet like)

Finally I would weigh them using the upside down Whayyhay technique

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Speed of Nipple erection,If the button turns into a bullet quickly then the juggs are for me

Gimp

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail "

What bribe would be needed for me to win?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail

What bribe would be needed for me to win? "

Let me buy you dinner!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail

A

What bribe would be needed for me to win? "

We would have to discuss the terms and conditions

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Entering on a stage wire I'd slip my cock between each pair of breasts and judge depth of penetration to workout diameter using some simple calculus.

I would also use this technique to judge gloveliness. The ability of the breasts to fit round a cock like a glove during a tit wank or fuck.

Then upside down hanging I would test the boobs for jiggliness giving them the two handed jiggle test.

Then using the pen grip I would test the nipples for width, length and erectility (the arousability of a nipple from rest to bullet like)

Finally I would weigh them using the upside down Whayyhay technique

"

what a thorough judge you would be, lmao!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail

I know you are "

shuuush don't tell em I'm easy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Speed of Nipple erection,If the button turns into a bullet quickly then the juggs are for me

Gimp"

I'm pretty sure a high percentage of 'bullets' appeared. what then?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Entering on a stage wire I'd slip my cock between each pair of breasts and judge depth of penetration to workout diameter using some simple calculus.

I would also use this technique to judge gloveliness. The ability of the breasts to fit round a cock like a glove during a tit wank or fuck.

Then upside down hanging I would test the boobs for jiggliness giving them the two handed jiggle test.

Then using the pen grip I would test the nipples for width, length and erectility (the arousability of a nipple from rest to bullet like)

Finally I would weigh them using the upside down Whayyhay technique

what a thorough judge you would be, lmao!"

I don't know about thorough but it would be comical

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail

I know you are shuuush don't tell em I'm easy "

i think 'easy' may be an understatement.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Not The 9 O'Clock News American Express advert method

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples "

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method "

Yes please!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if you were given the opportunity to judge a 'best boobs' contest, what criteria would you judge by? ....and what technique would you employ in said judging considering that you are doing so blindfolded?

having recently experienced this phenomenon for the first time, I'm wondering if the 'judge' did a proper job of it "

Size, texture, flavour, aerodynamics, critical mass etc etc. or, slap em and see which ones wobble the longest, or even all of these

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method "

Well they say practice makes perfect . So yes go on then

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm never gonna get a prize....

Well not unless the judge has very small hands

lol many ladies won't hun. the judge can only choose one lady, after all. I would probably of been open to blackmail

A

I know you are shuuush don't tell em I'm easy

i think 'easy' may be an understatement. "

Cheeky mare

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/05/14 18:17:49]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method

Yes please!"

I've got two you and Toshn can have one each

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

That they are not hairy lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *relanddirectMan
over a year ago

cheshire


"should probably state this was a .....mostly.... clothed boobs scenario. lol"
in that scenario surely your judging the bra?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Entering on a stage wire I'd slip my cock between each pair of breasts and judge depth of penetration to workout diameter using some simple calculus.

I would also use this technique to judge gloveliness. The ability of the breasts to fit round a cock like a glove during a tit wank or fuck.

Then upside down hanging I would test the boobs for jiggliness giving them the two handed jiggle test.

Then using the pen grip I would test the nipples for width, length and erectility (the arousability of a nipple from rest to bullet like)

Finally I would weigh them using the upside down Whayyhay technique

"

Where do I sign up for the competition? Not likely do win on erectability but I'll give it a good try Hehe

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills


"That they are not hairy lol "

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"if you were given the opportunity to judge a 'best boobs' contest, what criteria would you judge by? ....and what technique would you employ in said judging considering that you are doing so blindfolded?

having recently experienced this phenomenon for the first time, I'm wondering if the 'judge' did a proper job of it

Size, texture, flavour, aerodynamics, critical mass etc etc. or, slap em and see which ones wobble the longest, or even all of these "

nearly crying with laughter over this post, too.

I've no idea how the judge would describe the last technique he used. it hasn't, i don't think, been mentioned yet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Speed of Nipple erection,If the button turns into a bullet quickly then the juggs are for me

Gimp

I'm pretty sure a high percentage of 'bullets' appeared. what then? "

Yhen it would be a case of who slipped me their room number first....and the winner is

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That they are not hairy lol

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation "

ah now !! If moobs there after . I'm yer man

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then

I was excited

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That they are not hairy lol "

and that they're, in fact, boobs. let's just say, hijinks and shenanigans ensued at the end of the comp. one was a set of moobs. one wasn't

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method

Yes please!

I've got two you and Toshn can have one each "

Sounds like a deal to me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Then

I was excited "

I bet'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Speed of Nipple erection,If the button turns into a bullet quickly then the juggs are for me

Gimp

I'm pretty sure a high percentage of 'bullets' appeared. what then?

Yhen it would be a case of who slipped me their room number first....and the winner is "

i don't think anyone thought to bribe him. wonder how expensive he would've been

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That they are not hairy lol

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation ah now !! If moobs there after . I'm yer man "

Jeeze not according to your pics Phwoar!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"That they are not hairy lol

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation "

I was talking about boobs...trust me I've seen some boobs with hairs on them and on a female

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That they are not hairy lol

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation

I was talking about boobs...trust me I've seen some boobs with hairs on them and on a female "

Eek

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That they are not hairy lol

I was enjoying this until you brought Moobs into the equation

I was talking about boobs...trust me I've seen some boobs with hairs on them and on a female "

Bleugh

There are times when a queasy emoticon would be useful

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

yeah yeah back on topic and off hairy things, please

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"yeah yeah back on topic and off hairy things, please "

Good point. When can I test my allocated one boob of yours?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The ultimate test for the perfect boobs must be 'the motorboat test'.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"yeah yeah back on topic and off hairy things, please "
Well yours are a good handfull

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Grope the boob . Listen for a moan . Winner . Simples

Wanna try it later just to perfect the method

Yes please!

I've got two you and Toshn can have one each "

And yours are a good mouthfull

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"yeah yeah back on topic and off hairy things, please

Good point. When can I test my allocated one boob of yours?!"

that wasn't me that allocated one to you, though it may be negotiable.

cv and covering letter to my inbox. applications close at midnight.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ultimate test for the perfect boobs must be 'the motorboat test'. "

lol! i think that's a near description of the last technique he used. still not sure what exactlyit tells you about the boobs.....i just thought it was ffunny.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"yeah yeah back on topic and off hairy things, please

Good point. When can I test my allocated one boob of yours?!

that wasn't me that allocated one to you, though it may be negotiable.

cv and covering letter to my inbox. applications close at midnight. "

There is an email in your inbox from about half an hour ago!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Boob judge has entered the building.

Size, weight, bounciness, and above all motorboatability,

Form a line ladies!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The Boob judge has entered the building.

Size, weight, bounciness, and above all motorboatability,

Form a line ladies! "

wondered when you'd show up, lol.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?"

lol! no, mine aren't all that great. they're a Little floppy and stretchmarked from breastfeeding four ravenous munchkins. I'm ok with them though, as they're quite squeezy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?

lol! no, mine aren't all that great. they're a Little floppy and stretchmarked from breastfeeding four ravenous munchkins. I'm ok with them though, as they're quite squeezy. "

Awwwww but plllleeeeeeeeeeeaaase????? Please let me judge them!?!?!! Ill be you best friend!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

. . i'd pass and wait for the pussy comp

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?

lol! no, mine aren't all that great. they're a Little floppy and stretchmarked from breastfeeding four ravenous munchkins. I'm ok with them though, as they're quite squeezy.

Awwwww but plllleeeeeeeeeeeaaase????? Please let me judge them!?!?!! Ill be you best friend! "

are you going to motorboat them, too? lol. oh, go on then. a little grope night just do them good.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


". . i'd pass and wait for the pussy comp "

now that one i would win

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?

lol! no, mine aren't all that great. they're a Little floppy and stretchmarked from breastfeeding four ravenous munchkins. I'm ok with them though, as they're quite squeezy.

Awwwww but plllleeeeeeeeeeeaaase????? Please let me judge them!?!?!! Ill be you best friend!

are you going to motorboat them, too? lol. oh, go on then. a little grope night just do them good. "

Oooooooo squeezy!! Very nice. 9.2 from the bolton judge.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ok miss earnmenow, im here. What can i do for you? Would you like to be judged?

lol! no, mine aren't all that great. they're a Little floppy and stretchmarked from breastfeeding four ravenous munchkins. I'm ok with them though, as they're quite squeezy.

Awwwww but plllleeeeeeeeeeeaaase????? Please let me judge them!?!?!! Ill be you best friend!

are you going to motorboat them, too? lol. oh, go on then. a little grope night just do them good.

Oooooooo squeezy!! Very nice. 9.2 from the bolton judge. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire


". . i'd pass and wait for the pussy comp

.

now that one i would win "

looks so innocent with its own wee halo

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


". . i'd pass and wait for the pussy comp

.

now that one i would win looks so innocent with its own wee halo "

all of me looks innocent. looks, however, are very deceiving

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hirsty_WorkMan
over a year ago

Exeter

It would have to be a test of the senses. Did it feel good to the hands? How did the nipples react to some slight teasing? Move in closer and you would get a smell for the boob haha. Taste is a very important one & how the nipple felt against the tip of my tonight. Eyes are blindfolded so unfortunately I would not be able to see them. But then finally the all important listen! How did they sound haha?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hirsty_WorkMan
over a year ago

Exeter

The tip of my tongue even, damn auto correct

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It would have to be a test of the senses. Did it feel good to the hands? How did the nipples react to some slight teasing? Move in closer and you would get a smell for the boob haha. Taste is a very important one & how the nipple felt against the tip of my tonight. Eyes are blindfolded so unfortunately I would not be able to see them. But then finally the all important listen! How did they sound haha? "

sound? are you going to thump them like youtest rripe melons? or thwack them together?

or spank them?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

cuppability

bounce

suckability

nipple sticky outiness

any reaction such as sucking teeth ... going oooo ... or cumming noises score extra

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top