FabSwingers.com forum: Toshn`s Cafe is now open

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing??

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Lmaf

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing?? "
Nah just a cold buffet

You shit bed Giles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing?? Nah just a cold buffet

You shit bed Giles

Nightmare Jane..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing?? Nah just a cold buffet

You shit bed Giles

Nightmare Jane..

"
awww you need a cuddle .Or just a good old fashioned humping

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing?? Nah just a cold buffet

You shit bed Giles

Nightmare Jane..

awww you need a cuddle .Or just a good old fashioned humping

What about sleep?? Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs...

Ok so its self service but have you cooked everytging n pug it into a hot plate thing?? Nah just a cold buffet

You shit bed Giles

Nightmare Jane..

awww you need a cuddle .Or just a good old fashioned humping

What about sleep?? Lol"
That was not one of my choices

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Me cafes not very busy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So what you are really saying is if you want anything then it's go make ya effin own cos you can't be arsed

oh Morning mate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cold breakfast, no tea. Ffs tosh you're letting the side down.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

"
Which bit of the self service did you not understand ? But seen as though you want it in bed I may be swayed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody favouritism is it. Stomps off to get cold food.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Which bit of the self service did you not understand ? But seen as though you want it in bed I may be swayed

Lol well that was easy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody favouritism is it. Stomps off to get cold food. "

MorningTwinkle my lovely x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Bore da PP. Oh a nice warm croissant with strawberry jam if your offering. Ta

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

"
Excuse me !! I am making the tea for the lovely legs . And reaping the benefits

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Bloody favouritism is it. Stomps off to get cold food.

MorningTwinkle my lovely x"

Morning again phone dweller. Yep still doing it how bessar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody favouritism is it. Stomps off to get cold food.

MorningTwinkle my lovely x"

Morning sweet cheeks. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Excuse me !! I am making the tea for the lovely legs . And reaping the benefits "

Ok you're excused

now bugger off

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

"
Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx"
oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx"

You can have one of mine. I've got Toshn and PP making me tea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sausage, bacon, egg, mushrooms, black pudding, beans, fried toast and a large tea with milk and 2 sugars please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sausage, bacon, egg, mushrooms, black pudding, beans, fried toast and a large tea with milk and 2 sugars please

get me one too whilst you're at it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Right I'm off down the cafe seeing as no one is talkin to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Start calling you billy lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

At bloody last. Jeese the things a girl has to do to get a cuppa. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Start calling you billy lol

cheesy squeezy peas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Right I'm off down the cafe seeing as no one is talkin to me

Its a cold buffet pp. Dont get your hopes up. Service is crap. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Right I'm off down the cafe seeing as no one is talkin to me

Its a cold buffet pp. Dont get your hopes up. Service is crap. Xx"

I know thats why I'm off to the cafe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Right I'm off down the cafe seeing as no one is talkin to me

Its a cold buffet pp. Dont get your hopes up. Service is crap. Xx

I know thats why I'm off to the cafe

whilst you're there a cuppa wouldnt go a miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Start calling you billy lol

cheesy squeezy peas

Lmfao

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

At bloody last. Jeese the things a girl has to do to get a cuppa. Xx"
I could suggest something

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

At bloody last. Jeese the things a girl has to do to get a cuppa. Xx I could suggest something

Is it rude or nasty. If it is thrn no. I made my own

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

At bloody last. Jeese the things a girl has to do to get a cuppa. Xx I could suggest something

Is it rude or nasty. If it is thrn no. I made my own"
It was rude I'm afraid

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

Good morning everyone, good morning Tosh!

Why are you so tired this morning?

So you are doing self service this morning? I can find some strawberry milk but can't see the straws......I need a pink one please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Morning everyone. Tea and crumpets please. As I'm still in bed can you bring them over ? X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Good morning everyone, good morning Tosh!

Why are you so tired this morning?

So you are doing self service this morning? I can find some strawberry milk but can't see the straws......I need a pink one please

"
yer help yerself . Its D.I.Y in here . Im sure you've done that before

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

Nooooo I usually stand looking helpless and men do stuff for me.......

Be a love and bring me a pink straw, please

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I will just have a large americano please

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nooooo I usually stand looking helpless and men do stuff for me.......

Be a love and bring me a pink straw, please

"
Ok . Cause its you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I will just have a large americano please

"
Self service . Help yourself

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"I will just have a large americano please

Self service . Help yourself

Don't be mean!!! You can't bring me a straw and not take an americano.....you might make a girl cry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I was gonna say good morning Toshn and place my order for tea and a nice bacon buttie seeing as I have a day of and I'm sure I need pampering....

Shocking going service tosh

Couldn't I at least get tea in bed Mr Sexy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good morning all. Have a great day xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tut tut Tosh. This is just not good enough.

Have made my own tea now. Not having any of your self service stuff, its been there a couple of hours now!!!

Will wish you a bore da and be on my way again to the kitchen to D.I.Y. XXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Start calling you billy lol

cheesy squeezy peas

Lmfao "

Can I have hot ones please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Morning all,

Well I was going to be nice to Toshn as say bring the coffee back to bed, but seen as though its self service anyone else like to help and bring them back to bed?

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh see happy crack is in one of her moods again

Sod off mard arse. Youre the one who started it by making it self service.

Your tired

Don't tell me you have soggied you pants again

Nah. Had a dry night. Gold star for me. No frigging tea in the offering. Xx oh god anything to shut yer up .. Tea on its way

At bloody last. Jeese the things a girl has to do to get a cuppa. Xx I could suggest something

Is it rude or nasty. If it is thrn no. I made my own It was rude I'm afraid

youre naughty and the cup won't fit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good morning all. IF anyone is looking for help with the ta and toast service I'm now available

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good morning all. IF anyone is looking for help with the ta and toast service I'm now available

Can I have coffee, white one and a slice of toast please x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good morning all. IF anyone is looking for help with the ta and toast service I'm now available

Can I have coffee, white one and a slice of toast please x"

With pleasure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

"
But im tired

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

"
You know I do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

I'm already taking coffee and toast to Worksop for Goldilocks I could give you one at the same time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

You know I do

It's no good being selective with the jobs you pit the effort into.........we wanted tea

not this serve yourself malarkey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

I'm already taking coffee and toast to Worksop for Goldilocks I could give you one at the same time

Can I have marmite on my toast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Bore da PP. Oh a nice warm croissant with strawberry jam if your offering. Ta

I have plenty of cold!! Costa coffee going begging! And one caffeine over dosed! Dog...

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Bacon and cheese toastie please with extra bacon and a caramel slice and black coffee.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Bore da PP. Oh a nice warm croissant with strawberry jam if your offering. Ta

I have plenty of cold!! Costa coffee going begging! And one caffeine over dosed! Dog...

ha ha ha I've just laughed out loud in the office Mrs F

I am worried bout your poor dog though

Crikey, just thought...hope you've taken the flower out your doodaa otherwise you've probably got green fly by now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Bore da PP. Oh a nice warm croissant with strawberry jam if your offering. Ta

I have plenty of cold!! Costa coffee going begging! And one caffeine over dosed! Dog...

ha ha ha I've just laughed out loud in the office Mrs F

I am worried bout your poor dog though

Crikey, just thought...hope you've taken the flower out your doodaa otherwise you've probably got green fly by now

Greenfly!!? It's bloody taken root I tell ya!! It's turned into a virtual bush

lol... And the dog alas too late... Costa have a fab rug though! And I have free coffees for life!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bore da n good morning everyone .

Due to the fact I am knackered . This cafe is self service

Bore da Toshn. Not impressed with this self service malarkey

I'd like a nice cup of weak tea in bed please

Bore da. On it's way Miss Legs and would like like anything else.

Bore da PP. Oh a nice warm croissant with strawberry jam if your offering. Ta

I have plenty of cold!! Costa coffee going begging! And one caffeine over dosed! Dog...

ha ha ha I've just laughed out loud in the office Mrs F

I am worried bout your poor dog though

Crikey, just thought...hope you've taken the flower out your doodaa otherwise you've probably got green fly by now

Greenfly!!? It's bloody taken root I tell ya!! It's turned into a virtual bush

lol... And the dog alas too late... Costa have a fab rug though! And I have free coffees for life!

lol you are totally bonkers mrs F

Trimming your lady garden takes on a whole new meaning. It was carnations wasn't it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bloody self serve, ya ole fart, trying getting to bed at night

But im tired

Ha, a jobs a job put ya all into it man or don't bother

I'm already taking coffee and toast to Worksop for Goldilocks I could give you one at the same time

Can I have marmite on my toast

You can have what you like on your toast

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd stick to a wank. Breakfast is overrated lol.

...that is one thing i think we can all self service haha

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy"

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

"
ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice "

I'm still waiting for preferential treatment here

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice

I'm still waiting for preferential treatment here

"
it needs to be earned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice

I'm still waiting for preferential treatment here

it needs to be earned

Ever heard of payment in advance

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice

I'm still waiting for preferential treatment here

it needs to be earned

Ever heard of payment in advance

"
ok cup of tea coming up . I expect payment in kind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since it is self-service I think I'll go round the back and swap everything about in the cupboards and put a few bonus items in the fridge, such as the fire extinguisher.

That's not the fire extinguisher, it's an extra large sex toy

Ooooh, that's going to come home with me then

ffs don't take the pin out . You will have foam coming out of every orifice

I'm still waiting for preferential treatment here

it needs to be earned

Ever heard of payment in advance

ok cup of tea coming up . I expect payment in kind

Oh you will have ....in bucket loads

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I put my order in for morning please, coffee one, toast and a nice wake up call about seven ready for work, thank you muchly x

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