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By *uby0000 OP   Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

if you knew for sure your best friend was being cheated on would you tell them or keep quiet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if you knew for sure your best friend was being cheated on would you tell them or keep quiet"

I would tell them as I wouldn't be much of a friend if I kept it quiet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd keep quiet, I've been in that position & she won't thank you for telling her X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

tell them..

even if i didnt know the person id tell them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd speak to the other half, tell them I know and tell them to sort it. Sometimes people do know that it's going on but don't want to deal with it, if you tell them, they'll have too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd speak to the other half, tell them I know and tell them to sort it. Sometimes people do know that it's going on but don't want to deal with it, if you tell them, they'll have too "

this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd speak to the other half, tell them I know and tell them to sort it. Sometimes people do know that it's going on but don't want to deal with it, if you tell them, they'll have too "

Thats is possibly the best answer to intervene can damage your relationship with your friend to go to the person doing it and letting them sort it is always the best option as I see it.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Tell them, not an easy thing to do, but I wouldn't hesitate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

personally i dont think anyone elses life is anything to do with me, so why would i?

this could backfire spectacularly.

let her find out herself and be the mate you aare when the shit hits the fan.

she will thank you more for that than telling her.

you can deny all knowledge of it too, but you cant if you tell her.

she could accuse you of knowing for ages

being one of his conquests, hell, he could even tell her you came onto him and he spurned your advances and so this is your payback.

look after your own shit and let others sort theirs

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I would tell them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"personally i dont think anyone elses life is anything to do with me, so why would i?

this could backfire spectacularly.

let her find out herself and be the mate you aare when the shit hits the fan.

she will thank you more for that than telling her.

you can deny all knowledge of it too, but you cant if you tell her.

she could accuse you of knowing for ages

being one of his conquests, hell, he could even tell her you came onto him and he spurned your advances and so this is your payback.

look after your own shit and let others sort theirs"

yet you said on the thread i started you would want to know.. odd

think how shit your mate would feel when she fins out you knew all along and let her carried on getting played for a fool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"personally i dont think anyone elses life is anything to do with me, so why would i?

this could backfire spectacularly.

let her find out herself and be the mate you aare when the shit hits the fan.

she will thank you more for that than telling her.

you can deny all knowledge of it too, but you cant if you tell her.

she could accuse you of knowing for ages

being one of his conquests, hell, he could even tell her you came onto him and he spurned your advances and so this is your payback.

look after your own shit and let others sort theirs

yet you said on the thread i started you would want to know.. odd

think how shit your mate would feel when she fins out you knew all along and let her carried on getting played for a fool"

i didnt, i said i wouldnt want to know, i would just rather the relationship ended.

how is she going to know you knew all along if you dont tell her?

answer is, she wont.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there ya go, save you going looking lol

.

.

.

quote:

no.

i have had it done, and it only hurt when i found out.

up until that point i was happily living in blissful ignorance.

even though lieing is the devils spunk, and honesty is all well and good, but when it hurts someone its not a good thing at all.

its just best not to cheat in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

how is she going to know you knew all along if you dont tell her?

answer is, she wont."

as if her fella isnt gonna be quiet and ignore the fact her mate knew.. he'd wanna cause as much damage surely if things are going tits up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell

Unless there is a chance of blackmail

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

how is she going to know you knew all along if you dont tell her?

answer is, she wont.

as if her fella isnt gonna be quiet and ignore the fact her mate knew.. he'd wanna cause as much damage surely if things are going tits up "

but we dont know if he knows that she knows, only that she knows (this is getting complicated lol)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell... even if at first she may not like you but at least you are being a true friend.. besides the truth will always be found out in the end. X Molly

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By *1KandiCouple
over a year ago

Jacksonville

Don't tell, you will some how be at the bad end when it is all done. Find a way for them to find out anonymously.

Be there for them to help to get through it. No good will come from you telling them. They probably won't believe you and when they confirm there will be issues between you and your friend....

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Already have. I even told on an ex-friend who was cheating, because he didn't seem to care that he was destroying everybody elses' friendships.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My best mate is the same as my sister. I would tell her just as I would my sister

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Told mine....she married him and we are just civil at any dos for joint friends. She opted not to believe me (and two others) when we told her he'd been coming on to us too. I do hate losing her as a friend, but I couldn't sit back and just watch as the guilt would have eaten away at me. I'd have lost her friendship anyway had I not told her because I was distancing myself from her so I didn't have to lie about him. If I was in the same situation again though I'd do the same thing because I personally would hate to find out afterwards, and have the humiliation of knowing everyone else knew

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

I'd tell her and face the consequences as I wouldn't be able to live with myself hiding it from her!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Told mine....she married him and we are just civil at any dos for joint friends. She opted not to believe me (and two others) when we told her he'd been coming on to us too. I do hate losing her as a friend, but I couldn't sit back and just watch as the guilt would have eaten away at me. I'd have lost her friendship anyway had I not told her because I was distancing myself from her so I didn't have to lie about him. If I was in the same situation again though I'd do the same thing because I personally would hate to find out afterwards, and have the humiliation of knowing everyone else knew "

You did the best thing possible. The one thing a real friend would have done. It just so happened to prove that fake happiness is more important to her than the real friendship you brought.

I've met and dropped a lot of people like that, and all the fakes fall away with them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would choose to confront her partner 1st and tell him what I knew. I would also confide in mutual friend to see what they thought before making a decision.

This is a situation where you could end up being damned if you do & damned if you don't....!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Told mine....she married him and we are just civil at any dos for joint friends. She opted not to believe me (and two others) when we told her he'd been coming on to us too. I do hate losing her as a friend, but I couldn't sit back and just watch as the guilt would have eaten away at me. I'd have lost her friendship anyway had I not told her because I was distancing myself from her so I didn't have to lie about him. If I was in the same situation again though I'd do the same thing because I personally would hate to find out afterwards, and have the humiliation of knowing everyone else knew

You did the best thing possible. The one thing a real friend would have done. It just so happened to prove that fake happiness is more important to her than the real friendship you brought.

I've met and dropped a lot of people like that, and all the fakes fall away with them."
Well said wiseman

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

How Id tell them, or give them support would depend on the friend. A question upon their relationship and well being may help more than stating an accusation on the other half. Id want someone there for me, and who didnt let me sustain deceit.

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