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Oral - Is it an end to a means?

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By *ariner192 OP   Man
over a year ago

Near Newport

I realise I am one of a minority (but believe growing) that gets a lot of pleasure from giving oral to a woman, without asking for anything in return.

However I was surprised when I was asked, "I suppose you want me to go down on you now?" and whilst I am not adverse to that, my response was "only if you want to" (and she didn't lol)

However what stuck in my mind, do people manipulate each other to get their partner to do something to them?

What happened to giving for providing pleasure to someone you care for (or swinging with for that matter!!!)

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton


"I realise I am one of a minority (but believe growing) that gets a lot of pleasure from giving oral to a woman, without asking for anything in return.

However I was surprised when I was asked, "I suppose you want me to go down on you now?" and whilst I am not adverse to that, my response was "only if you want to" (and she didn't lol)

However what stuck in my mind, do people manipulate each other to get their partner to do something to them?

What happened to giving for providing pleasure to someone you care for (or swinging with for that matter!!!)

"

I know what you mean - I love giving oral but would'nt reciprocate unless I wanted to if I was on the receiving end! And I wouldn't give just to receive either! It's got to be about doing something you want to do and not being pressured or feeling obliged to do anything you may not be in the mood to do! Does that make sense?! Z

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By *uckscouple2007Couple
over a year ago

Bucks

Christmas is all about giving; not receiving

Oops ; its Spring time now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Christmas is all about giving; not receiving

Oops ; its Spring time now "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I love giving oral, but to be honest not bothered about receiving oral back............

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex between partners should be never be contractual, sometimes one gives without receiving sometimes it is reverse, who is counting.

Slightly different I guess when meeting swing partners as there is perhaps more of an expectation to reciprocate??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well i love to give it and he loves to recieve, thats something u can never give enough of and i never expect it back in return if it happens it happens...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I realise I am one of a minority (but believe growing) that gets a lot of pleasure from giving oral to a woman, without asking for anything in return.

"

.

You are not alone is getting satisfaction out of satisfying your ladies without asking for anything in return, and good on you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sex between partners should be never be contractual, sometimes one gives without receiving sometimes it is reverse, who is counting.

Slightly different I guess when meeting swing partners as there is perhaps more of an expectation to reciprocate??"

I've not found such an expectation that if someone receives then they should give from anyone, it's always been about what people are comfortable with doing and mutual pleasure, enjoyment and fun!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Question to all then : In a swing meet and I am talking about a casual possibly one off meet... would people be happy to simply give without receiving?

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place


"Sex between partners should never be contractual, sometimes one gives without receiving sometimes it is reverse, who is counting"

hmmm i heard that before totally agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people."

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

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By *ariner192 OP   Man
over a year ago

Near Newport


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

"

With a swinging partner, if I have to give, then I do get pleasure, but with nothing in return, then more than likely I would not return, in everything its about engaging with each other or what is the point ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

With a swinging partner, if I have to give, then I do get pleasure, but with nothing in return, then more than likely I would not return, in everything its about engaging with each other or what is the point ?"

So what you are saying is that on one off meets expectations for reciprocity are higher?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Question to all then : In a swing meet and I am talking about a casual possibly one off meet... would people be happy to simply give without receiving? "

I have done that in couples meets and for specific reasons... I was a 'fluffer' if you like, but happy to be so and then leave and have fun with my own partner too. I enjoyed just giving without receiving from those special couples. xxxxx

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By *ariner192 OP   Man
over a year ago

Near Newport


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

With a swinging partner, if I have to give, then I do get pleasure, but with nothing in return, then more than likely I would not return, in everything its about engaging with each other or what is the point ?

So what you are saying is that on one off meets expectations for reciprocity are higher? "

If after meeting you decide the chemistry is there to go further, then you can't expect one to only take - either way round, if its not then just say no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

With a swinging partner, if I have to give, then I do get pleasure, but with nothing in return, then more than likely I would not return, in everything its about engaging with each other or what is the point ?

So what you are saying is that on one off meets expectations for reciprocity are higher?

If after meeting you decide the chemistry is there to go further, then you can't expect one to only take - either way round, if its not then just say no "

Agreed!

Now I think oral is overrated when not accompanied by a glass of bubbly anyway pmsl oooops wrong thread...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are we talking she/he goes down, other partner to the act cums, she/he walks off, or are we talking it's part of the evening's entertainment in which both partners get pleasure one way or another?

I love to go down, I find it kicks off proceedings very nicely - as well as prolonging and slowing the urgency. I love to receive, but it happens far less. Do I expect it in return? No, if I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't do it. I don't "expect" him to perform any particular act.

That would be different it it was a life partner or even FB, we'd discuss our likes/dislikes surely. A one nighter is just that, and by what he's gonna give back, you decide if he should come back?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are we talking she/he goes down, other partner to the act cums, she/he walks off, or are we talking it's part of the evening's entertainment in which both partners get pleasure one way or another?

I love to go down, I find it kicks off proceedings very nicely - as well as prolonging and slowing the urgency. I love to receive, but it happens far less. Do I expect it in return? No, if I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't do it. I don't "expect" him to perform any particular act.

That would be different it it was a life partner or even FB, we'd discuss our likes/dislikes surely. A one nighter is just that, and by what he's gonna give back, you decide if he should come back?"

I love doing nice things for people, too and get a real sense of pleasure from doing so, whether it is a massage or going down or whatever, my pleasure is in that case not of a sexual nature and my partner is similar in his attitude towards giving. We dont need anything in return on a one off meet other than the pleasure of having given pleasure.

I was just curious how people felt in general about a "one-way" theme ona one off meet?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I prefer giving than recieving that doesnt mean i dont like recieving but if i had too choose i would sooner give

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By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago

Back of Beyond

As the male half of the marriage, I have to say that I am quite happy to go down on any lady, 1 or more than 1 without receiving anything in return.

I find it a pleasure to give oral sex and watch the lady orgasm. If I have it reciprocated or have penetrative sex then that is just a bonus, its not the end to a means.

In fact I have attended party's where I have been quite happy spreading oral skills around the ladies, and then felt pressured by some of them to actually have sex with them. When in fact nothing was further from my mind!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"However I was surprised when I was asked, "I suppose you want me to go down on you now?" and whilst I am not adverse to that, my response was "only if you want to" (and she didn't lol)

"

what a very strange thing to say, comes over as she almost saw it as a chore, im sure if i disliked giving out blow jobs to the point i felt i had to say something like that i wouldnt be swinging lol

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 28/04/10 09:18:42]

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"I have to say that if I gave oral to a woman and she responded with, "I suppose I have to go down on you now," my reply would be, "no darlin', I suppose you'd best fuck off now!"

Can't stand selfish people.

That is what I was really asking - it is all very well to say one is happy to give without receiving and in the loving relationship that is totally ok. But I wonder if it is equally as true across the board on one off meets, when perhaps one party has gone through considerable trouble and travelling to meet?

"

I would have thought before a meet all parties had discussed what their bounderies are....so would know wether a person liked oral or not.

For me though, I love to suck, so as long as I can do that at a meet, then recieving can take a back seat....

There is no way I would recieve oral from someone who didn't want to give it out, for me the best oral for both parties is when the person giving is enjoying it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really enjoy giving and receiving oral sex, probably more so than actually shagging, and I have experienced both scenarios where I have just received it or just given without getting it in return.

Every person is different, every swing meet is different, so I don't expect to do or receive specific "pleasures"

The more I think about this, the thing that comes to mind is that we all have our "sunconsious sex play script" that we follow, ie, sexy chat up, kissy kissy, oral, shagging, sexy cuddle, kissy kissy, dress and move on, lol, etc etc, and most times I would wager that it comes in that order too, without too much variation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When meeting or playing for the first time If you have instigated the meeting then always expect to give and expect nothing in return. The other party has agreed to meet/play so that should be a reward in itself. Lots of people find they get pleasure from giving especially when you see the other party express their satisfaction from your attentions. Treat the other party as a friend not a sex object for your own satisfaction and maybe the fun might be better for both parties.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a relationship scenario NO, when swinging HELL YES, the kissing, teasing and pleasing and the whole build up is what makes things so great, would rather miss out on the penetration than oral any day, having said all that, communication is the key.

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