FabSwingers.com forum: Favourite limerick.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What is your favourite limerick?

Here is one of mine,

The new cinematic emporium

is not just a super sensorium

but a highly effectual

heterosexual

mutual masurbatorium

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Mary had a little lamb

she tied it to a pylon

10,000 volts shot up its ass

and turned its wool to nylon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She was only a Tarmac'ers daughty but she loved here asrephelt.

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

There was an old man from Leeds

Who swallowed a packet of seeds

In less than an hour, his cock was a flower

And his pubes were a tangle of s!!

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By *bony in IvoryCouple
over a year ago

Black&White Utopia

There was a young girl named Sapphire,

who succumbed to her lover’s desire,

she said “It’s a sin,

but now that it’s in,

could you shove it a few inches higher?”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a wonderful thing is a nose.

It grows and it grows, and it grows.

It grows on your head,

While you're lying in bed,

At the opposite end to your toes...

*Milligan*

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

There was a wise man called Frank..

He invented a New way to Wank..

He said you could Float - just like a Boat..

but - the first time he tried it he Sank..

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By *ittall2020Man
over a year ago

Norwich

[Removed by poster at 11/03/14 19:43:21]

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By *ittall2020Man
over a year ago

Norwich

Love the sapphire one. Here's a few more...

The cock of a docker from Fife,

Was the biggest I've seen in my life,

He'd stand in the garden,

With a bloody great hard-on,

And prop up the clothes for his wife.

---------------------

There was an old whore from Berlin,

Who had an enormous great quim,

It wasn't the size,

That attracted the flies,

But the jelly that hung round the rim.

---------------------------

There was a young lady from Bude,

Who went on the stage in the nude,

Til one night out front,

Someone shouted out "cunt"

Just like that, no excuse, bloody rude!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a man from China,

Who wasn't a very good climber.

He fell off a rock,

Broke his cock,

And now he's got a vagina!

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By *otTheReal01Man
over a year ago

London

I started a thread about limericks a day ago and it sank without trace with no replies.

There once was a man on FS,

Who was under a great deal of stress,

Some said "Too young hun,

go out and have fun",

So he bought a blonde wig and a dress.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a wonderful thing is a nose.

It grows and it grows, and it grows.

It grows on your head,

While you're lying in bed,

At the opposite end to your toes...

*Milligan*

I made the mistake of reading a Spike Milligan book on the bus home from work. I was laughing out loud like a fool

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By *udie_GirlTV/TS
over a year ago

Rochdale

Mary had a little lamb.

The midwife had a fit...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An inventive young chap named Bray

Constructed a cunt out of clay.....

But the heat from his prick....

Turned the clay into brick....

And wore all his foreskin away

Anon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A Darling young girl from Pitlochry...

Was shagging one night, in the rockery..

And when her lover did cum....

All over her bum...

She said.."This aint a shag, it's a mockery"

Anon (again...!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mary had a little lamb.

The midwife had a fit..."

of laughter

When she thought ewe was the father!

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By *lPulpoCouple
over a year ago

St Albans

A young married couple named Kelly

Now go through life belly-to-belly

You see, in their haste,

They used sticky paste,

Instead of petroleum jelly!

A sailor, just back from the sea

Was stung on the cock by a bee

Now he makes lots of money

By oozing pure honey

Whenever he goes for a pee!

There was a young harlot named Sue

Who plugged up her pussy with glue

She said, with a grin

"If they pay to get in,

They can pay to get out of it too!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a gruff guy called Crow

Who thought he'd like to make lot's of dough

He manipulated UNITE

So that he was All-Right

As he holidayed in Rio and sipped on Merlot...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A young married couple named Kelly

Now go through life belly-to-belly

You see, in their haste,

They used sticky paste,

Instead of petroleum jelly!

A sailor, just back from the sea

Was stung on the cock by a bee

Now he makes lots of money

By oozing pure honey

Whenever he goes for a pee!

There was a young harlot named Sue

Who plugged up her pussy with glue

She said, with a grin

"If they pay to get in,

They can pay to get out of it too!""

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester

There once was a girl from fab swingers

Who used to play only with singers

She loved a group orgy

With a choir from the clergy

Especially the ones with thick fingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/03/14 06:59:06]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got two favourites.

.....

There was a young girl from Australia

Who painted her arse like a dahlia

A penny a smell

Was all very well

But tuppence a lick was a failure

....

There was a young lady called Jill

Who swallowed a dynamite pill

They found her vagina

In North Carolina

And bits of her tits in Brazil

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a young lady from Ealing

Who had a peculiar feeling

She lay on her back

And opened her crack

Then piddled all over the celing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a young lady from Ealing

Who had a peculiar feeling

She lay on her back

And opened her crack

Then piddled all over the celing

The very same lady from Ealing

Once boarded a bus to Darjeeling

It said on the door

Please don't spit on the floor....

So, she stood up and spat on the ceiling.

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

She stood on the deck in the pale moonlight,

Her limbs were all a'quiver,

She sneezed, she coughed,

Her leg fell off,

And floated down the river

Les Dawson (I believe)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was an old man from Leeds

Who swallowed a packet of seeds

In less than an hour, his cock was a flower

And his pubes were a tangle of s!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Minxiest Minx in Fabland

Twirled a plate on a stick with one hand.

Leaving peas on the floor,

Gravy all up the door....

Now from chaos and mayhem she's banned...!!!

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By *hmeohmyMan
over a year ago

There was a young lady from Hitchin

Sat scratching herself in the kitchen

Her mother said "Rose, it's the crabs I suppose"

She said "bollocks, get on with your knitting"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a young woman called Lal

I hear shes a bit of a gal

She couldnt stop gushing

In the company of Toshn

And now hes her very best pal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have heard some tales

Coming from wales

That the men there shag the sheep

Well I'm afraid its a goat

That floats my boat

But that secret I will keep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have heard some tales

Coming from wales

That the men there shag the sheep

Well I'm afraid its a goat

That floats my boat

But that secret I will keep

You calling me a goat.......lucky you didn't say old as well

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By *ardlovinmanMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Down on fraggle rock

Catch a fraggle by the cock

Swing it round your head

Now the fraggles dead

Thank you primary school! Lol.

It's not the cough that carries you off but the coffin they carry you off in. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The Minxiest Minx in Fabland

Twirled a plate on a stick with one hand.

Leaving peas on the floor,

Gravy all up the door....

Now from chaos and mayhem she's banned...!!!

am giggling and somehow I don't think I will be banned from causing chaos and mayhem lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have heard some tales

Coming from wales

That the men there shag the sheep

Well I'm afraid its a goat

That floats my boat

But that secret I will keep

You calling me a goat.......lucky you didn't say old as well

"
Now wouldci say that about you !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll eat when I'm hungry

I'll drink when I'm dry

If a tree don't fall on me

I'll live till I die

.........

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear

A bear was fuzzy wuzzy

When fuzzy wuzzy lost his hair

He wasn't fuzzy was he!

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By *reaminmycoffeeCouple
over a year ago

Putney

The herring is a lucky Fish

from all disease inured

if ill when caught at sea

immediately he's cured

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must go down to the sea again,

to the lonely sea and the sky;

I left my shoes and socks there -

I wonder if they're dry?

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