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Pre-Nuptial Agreements

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just watching the news. Interesting debate. So apparently today the report from the Law Commission could make them binding.

Just wondered what your thoughts were. Is it cold-hearted so one party in particular looking after their interests or sensible because you both agree what you think is fair and know where you stand.

I think I could be in either camp. I know that my Mum had one, as she had been widowed twice previously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If or when I ever embark on another long term common law partnership, I shall set up a Pre nuptial.... To protect All parties...

Its not cold, it's practical...IMHO...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having been through the divorce fiasco, I'm tempted to say 'yes, definitely' but could I say that to someone that I loved enough to marry (or whatever) again?

No chance!!

It's a real tough one, that.

Maybe I need to fond myself a filthy rich woman - or failing that, just filthy!!!

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

My two pennyworth. Without looking for an argument I have to say that prenups should either be legally binding or illegal and therefore unenforceable contracts.

The simple fact is that the way things are is just a recipe for even more bitter financial disputes on the break-up of a marriage that only benefit lawyers...

At the moment you sign a prenup and believe that if you break up the division of property is sorted, but then the lawyers step in and maybe it isn't. At least if they are made legally binding this will no longer be the case.

As for actually wanting or signing a prenup, that is a totally different question and should not be confused with a prenups legal status.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

After what my father put us through, logic kind of outweighs emotion.

If I owned my own house and married someone who was previously renting , I would make them sign a pre-nup.

I may love them but people can change and feelings can change and I don't think it's heartless or selfish to want to protect your own assets.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"After what my father put us through, logic kind of outweighs emotion.

If I owned my own house and married someone who was previously renting , I would make them sign a pre-nup.

I may love them but people can change and feelings can change and I don't think it's heartless or selfish to want to protect your own assets."

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By *andm288Couple
over a year ago

oxford


"After what my father put us through, logic kind of outweighs emotion.

If I owned my own house and married someone who was previously renting , I would make them sign a pre-nup.

I may love them but people can change and feelings can change and I don't think it's heartless or selfish to want to protect your own assets.

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just watching the news. Interesting debate. So apparently today the report from the Law Commission could make them binding.

Just wondered what your thoughts were. Is it cold-hearted so one party in particular looking after their interests or sensible because you both agree what you think is fair and know where you stand.

I think I could be in either camp. I know that my Mum had one, as she had been widowed twice previously. "

I was watching a piece on it on BBC this morning. It is a constructive aim for the Law Commission to look at it. I think pre-nups are a good idea to be available for those who want them. Better to have an agreement in place when loved up, than to have chaos on divorce. I have no issue with anyone who wants to ring-fence previously earned assets. And, no, I don't think it is tempting Fate to have one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a wonderful way to start a long term relationship.

If you have that much insecurity,then maybe getting married is not really what you should be doing.

Why would you want to marry a person that is already planning the DIVORCE.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts


"What a wonderful way to start a long term relationship.

If you have that much insecurity,then maybe getting married is not really what you should be doing.

Why would you want to marry a person that is already planning the DIVORCE.

"

There is insecurity and then there is being realistic. I don't enter long-term relationships planning the end, I just don't let emotions cloud my judgement.

As I said, whether you like it or not, people can change and feelings can change. It's all very well being bright eyed and bushy tailed but if things do come to an end, I don't see why you should have to re-mortgage or re-buy something you've already paid for just because things may have become bitter or somebody developed £-signs for eyeballs.

It's not about planning or encouraging the end of a relationship, it's just protecting yourself incase the worst happens. x

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By *eMontresMan
over a year ago

Halesowen

Having lost 80% of what I had worked for for 15 years, I would never marry again without a legally binding pre-nup.

I now own my own house outright, have savings, and only work 34 weeks a year. But having to walk away with just the contents of a transit van and starting again from zero, is not something I would ever want to do again, and at my time of life, would be virtually impossible to recover from.

Plus, whilst my ex squandered her share and has no legacy to leave our children (she's not even on the deeds of the house she shares with her new husband), I'm not prepared to dilute the legacy I've managed to rebuild for my kids.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

I agree wholeheartedly with them.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Its big in the states....My ex parents wanted him to get a pre nup as they felt i only married him to get a green card...they also thought I was after his money...What they failed to see was I had my own money and savings which I spent during the course of the marriage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having lost 80% of what I had worked for for 15 years, I would never marry again without a legally binding pre-nup.

I now own my own house outright, have savings, and only work 34 weeks a year. But having to walk away with just the contents of a transit van and starting again from zero, is not something I would ever want to do again, and at my time of life, would be virtually impossible to recover from.

Plus, whilst my ex squandered her share and has no legacy to leave our children (she's not even on the deeds of the house she shares with her new husband), I'm not prepared to dilute the legacy I've managed to rebuild for my kids."

out of curiosity how did she get 80 %?

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts


"Having lost 80% of what I had worked for for 15 years, I would never marry again without a legally binding pre-nup.

I now own my own house outright, have savings, and only work 34 weeks a year. But having to walk away with just the contents of a transit van and starting again from zero, is not something I would ever want to do again, and at my time of life, would be virtually impossible to recover from.

Plus, whilst my ex squandered her share and has no legacy to leave our children (she's not even on the deeds of the house she shares with her new husband), I'm not prepared to dilute the legacy I've managed to rebuild for my kids."

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Who gets the butt plugs, who deserves the dildos, it is all important. I think having an arrangement shows maturity of thought, that youre not blindingly ploughing into a relationship thinking it can only move in one direction. It is also a way to plan, where you havent reached the point where there may be some anonymosity etc, or where memories have not faded, over a long period, as it is still earlier days. It is always better to think ahead, like contingency planning. I hope these arrangements are given legal standing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand how one half can walk away with their ex partner's assets. It's ridiculous. How can marrying a rich man entitle a woman to half his house and fortune? Each should walk away with what is theirs. Marriage shouldn't mean giving up what you own.

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By *entfootloverMan
over a year ago

Sevenoaks


"I don't understand how one half can walk away with their ex partner's assets. It's ridiculous. How can marrying a rich man entitle a woman to half his house and fortune? Each should walk away with what is theirs. Marriage shouldn't mean giving up what you own. "

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By *U1966Man
over a year ago

Devon

I would get one before i married again my house is for my daughter and is nearly all paid for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What a wonderful way to start a long term relationship.

If you have that much insecurity,then maybe getting married is not really what you should be doing.

Why would you want to marry a person that is already planning the DIVORCE.

"

Excellent post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would get one before i married again my house is for my daughter and is nearly all paid for"

just put it in your will advise the future ex wife of your wishes. No need for a pre nup.

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By *U1966Man
over a year ago

Devon


"I would get one before i married again my house is for my daughter and is nearly all paid for

just put it in your will advise the future ex wife of your wishes. No need for a pre nup."

Would rather not take a chance and make sure with such am important decision

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

It's a good idea. Practical and could save a lot later.

I was married, initially, in a mosque. The ceremony also included an agreement that my husband would pay me a certain amount in the event of divorce. We decided on a nominal amount at the time.

So pre - nuptials have been around for a while in various cultures and religions. Usually to protect a woman and her children.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge


"I don't understand how one half can walk away with their ex partner's assets. It's ridiculous. How can marrying a rich man entitle a woman to half his house and fortune? Each should walk away with what is theirs. Marriage shouldn't mean giving up what you own.

"

That also applies the other way around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sends out wrong signal altogether in my view before evenconsidering marriage mistrust is there as soon as folk say i love you but to be safe when i leave you lets arrange a pre nuo.

Clearly love is..... pre nup.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say that division of assets is something that should be protected from unscrupulous lawyers having been through a messy divorce. My ex got legal aid and basically dragged it out till I had a £19000 solicitors bill losing my house etc. If a prenup was in place there wouldn't have been that possibly well if they were binding. No I didn't go into the marriage looking for a divorce but the ex did so I wish something was there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sends out wrong signal altogether in my view before evenconsidering marriage mistrust is there as soon as folk say i love you but to be safe when i leave you lets arrange a pre nuo.

Clearly love is..... pre nup."

No if both parties are prepared to sign then it shows it's about love and not money

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I've no idea whether I'd ever use one. Like anything , it would be what feels right at the time. However, like others here, I've come away from a marriage with a lot less than I took into it. So I can see both sides of the coin.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Years ago we all married young and came into marriage with nothing. Now we get married much later in our mid 30's with assets, we have worked hard to build up.nothing wrong with a prenup considering the changing circumstances. I have seen a few guys beaming with smugness when they have moved in with a woman who is solvent and asset rich who has never married and never had kids... All they have left is a trail of bookies slips and trail of children the state is paying for..get a prenup. If you have no pot to piss in don't worry about one!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't understand how one half can walk away with their ex partner's assets. It's ridiculous. How can marrying a rich man entitle a woman to half his house and fortune? Each should walk away with what is theirs. Marriage shouldn't mean giving up what you own.

That also applies the other way around. "

True. But I was too lazy to type it twice (both ways).

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