FabSwingers.com forum: Pimp the Ryan

By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

It has come to my attention that some ladies believe Ryan to be too popular to be interested in them. Or that he'd be too busy licking the inside of McDonald's bags or something. Some ladies are shy.

So, I am offering a new service. If you fancy Ryan and want to shag him, (ladies only and absolutely no strap-ons), you can tell me and I'll tell him. Remember 'my friend fancies you' from school? Kinda like that.

If you hear from him, get some cookies in. If not, you can pretend nothing was ever said.

(*lurks in corner waiting for Ryan to notice this*)

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

Send him up please

I will even get him a chippy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who's Ryan? X

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Who's Ryan? X"

He hangs around here sometimes. He likes burgers and cookies.

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Send him up please

I will even get him a chippy

I'll tell him as soon as I get caug...as soon as he notices this.

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Yes you are. Burgermeat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Erm.... Yes you are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Don't lie you love the attention

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

It's a veggie free thread then. Where's all the sausage lovers?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a veggie free thread then. Where's all the sausage lovers?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Send him my way ...... am sure he would love to participate in some chaos and mayhem lol

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Poor boy - would you like a place to hide from all this attention???

By the way, bring the sausage!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

" (ladies only and absolutely no strap-ons)"

Damn it!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why don't I get offered these services? Is it because my bum ain't orange?

That's racialistism that is

Stomps about in usual bad tempered way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd shag him an all lol

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Poor boy - would you like a place to hide from all this attention???

By the way, bring the sausage!

As long as it's not the cupboard under your stairs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooh yes please!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I'd shag him an all lol

I'm worried about you now Pops. Lipstick then man shagging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd shag him an all lol

I'm worried about you now Pops. Lipstick then man shagging

I think pops caught the ghey sitting next to lipsticks at the social

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

That isn't the rumour that is going around

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"I'd shag him an all lol

I'm worried about you now Pops. Lipstick then man shagging

You forgot the meggings.

I wish I could forget the meggings.

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

That isn't the rumour that is going around

He only sells himself for the decent chocolate chip cookies y'know

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Why don't I get offered these services? Is it because my bum ain't orange?

That's racialistism that is

Stomps about in usual bad tempered way"

Uhh. Pass.

How do we know if your bum is orange?

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I'd shag him an all lol

I'm worried about you now Pops. Lipstick then man shagging

I think pops caught the ghey sitting next to lipsticks at the social"

He will be stuck with that for life now.

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

That isn't the rumour that is going around

Never listen to a rumour. It's all lies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

That isn't the rumour that is going around

He only sells himself for the decent chocolate chip cookies y'know

I've got warm homemade ones

oh Ryan where art thou..?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a cookie factory.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I could always change ma username back to superryanfan

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By *nigmatic1Woman
over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

Oooooh please can I have a little go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why don't I get offered these services? Is it because my bum ain't orange?

That's racialistism that is

Stomps about in usual bad tempered way"

Oh go on then. Tell me who you want to shag and I'll let them know for you. In return for a donut. No need to flash your bum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah.... You can all keep him

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Oh hush you, the ladies are pimping you out

Ok, ok, ok...... But I'm not cheap

That isn't the rumour that is going around

Never listen to a rumour. It's all lies

Okay, I shall eat all my Foxes chocolate covered cookies then

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

Pah it's all bluster. Not one solitary name has been passed to my inbox

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a cookie factory."

I'm also McDonalds secret CEO.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He's mine and we secretly got married yesterday, all for the price of a cookie

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I have a cookie factory.

I'm also McDonalds secret CEO. "

Cock Education Officer?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd shag him an all lol

I'm worried about you now Pops. Lipstick then man shagging

Shall i remind you of the Avatar you had up of your pink lips? So, don't be trying to hide your face in a paper bag mister! Lol

...i'm kinky you know.

Mind you, after i saw the price of the lipstick. I thought, 'no thanks mate. I'd stick to mascara' haha

And VV - you love my meggins. All that leapard print on show. PHWOAAARRR!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

VV, Pimp my Ryan.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How much did he offer to do this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll give him a go. I like a challenge

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"How much did he offer to do this thread

Nothing to do with me guv honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How much did he offer to do this thread

Nothing to do with me guv honest. "

Yeah you would say thAt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll buy him a burger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oi I'm not a piece of meat you know

Poor boy - would you like a place to hide from all this attention???

By the way, bring the sausage!

As long as it's not the cupboard under your stairs!"

Oh I am we could find some where a little better than that! lol

After all, the dungeon is nearly finished!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not now .. theres a bloody queue and I like my face too much for my eyes to be scratched out

Darn it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not now .. theres a bloody queue and I like my face too much for my eyes to be scratched out

Darn it

Eyes scratched out? On here? Surely not!?!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I already told him myself. Unfortunately that doesn't mean he's moving up here to take up the offer. *sigh*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not now .. theres a bloody queue and I like my face too much for my eyes to be scratched out

Darn it

Eyes scratched out? On here? Surely not!?!

I know .. its a shocker

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"VV, Pimp my Ryan.

I nearly wrote that but he's not mine and it seemed somewhat presumptuous.

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"How much did he offer to do this thread

Nothing to do with me guv honest.

Yeah you would say thAt

This was entirely for my own mischievous entertainment.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Can I join the queue? I've got sweets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I join the queue? I've got sweets

Are they werthers originals.....??.I've heard that they are the playground lurkers sweet of choice...

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

"Can I join the queue? I've got sweets

Are they werthers originals.....??.I've heard that they are the playground lurkers sweet of choice...

Blackjacks and Fruit Salads

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I already told him myself. Unfortunately that doesn't mean he's moving up here to take up the offer. *sigh*"

Your nose is growing

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"It's a veggie free thread then. Where's all the sausage lovers?"

I had a sausage and egg mcmuffin this morning does that count

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"It's a veggie free thread then. Where's all the sausage lovers?

I had a sausage and egg mcmuffin this morning does that count

Breakfast wrap is the way to go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Okay might have to bring out the big guns....

I've got a brand new bottle of Mr Matey for you to rub lol

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By *3xymamaWoman
over a year ago

Uptown Top Ranking

Please can I try him too? I have welshcakes.....

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"Okay might have to bring out the big guns....

I've got a brand new bottle of Mr Matey for you to rub lol

Now you're talking

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"Please can I try him too? I have welshcakes.....

Are they tasty? I've never had one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm currently in a shop surrounded by shortbread, you know you want it Ryan!

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"It's a veggie free thread then. Where's all the sausage lovers?

I had a sausage and egg mcmuffin this morning does that count

Well I did look but trying new things doesn't always work out

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I'm currently in a shop surrounded by shortbread, you know you want it Ryan!"

Did you oversleep? You're late for work!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"I'm currently in a shop surrounded by shortbread, you know you want it Ryan!

Did you oversleep? You're late for work!"

Oops I read that as currently in bed

My mind is warped!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm currently in a shop surrounded by shortbread, you know you want it Ryan!

Did you oversleep? You're late for work!

Oops I read that as currently in bed

My mind is warped!"

You just like to think of me in bed

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By *3xymamaWoman
over a year ago

Uptown Top Ranking

"Please can I try him too? I have welshcakes.....

Are they tasty? I've never had one. "

They are gorgeous! You'll have to try some

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please can I try him too? I have welshcakes.....

Are they tasty? I've never had one.

They are gorgeous! You'll have to try some"

I will be making a big batch of welsh cakes for next weekend.....

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I already told him myself. Unfortunately that doesn't mean he's moving up here to take up the offer. *sigh*

Your nose is growing

I'd rather something else was!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he chats to me he will chat to anyone

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"If he chats to me he will chat to anyone

I'm all for care in the community

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

Lickety that is conjuring up images in my head I shall never block out haha and not one for where we meet

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

Lickety that is conjuring up images in my head I shall never block out haha and not one for where we meet

We'll have to meet him together and somewhere else then.

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?

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By *ee Viante OP Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?"

"Mini me"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?"

Well now the logistics mean 3 strap ons and one "mini me" so endless combinations

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?

Well now the logistics mean 3 strap ons and one "mini me" so endless combinations

I don't wear prosthetics. We'll both have to have a bit of Ryan Tiddler.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?

Well now the logistics mean 3 strap ons and one "mini me" so endless combinations

I don't wear prosthetics. We'll both have to have a bit of Ryan Tiddler.

That made me laugh, tiddler... Tis ok though as Ryan loves a bit of plastic

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

"No no no, all goes to pot when I'm not around!! I know 'our' Ryan and he bloody loves a strap on

So roll up all the ladies who fancy trying theirs out on Ryan

It's all change now. He wears the strap on, backwards. It's the only way he can keep up with the demand for his body as he can do two women at once.

What a fantastic idea. I'm in

Julie and I are having you this way but not in the cafe.

Who's having the strap on and who's having mini me?

"Mini me"?

With waders

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