FabSwingers.com forum: Nutty neighbours

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Over the years I have had some nutty neighbours strangely linked to cats let me explain.

When the kids were little we had large garden with swings in etc. Neighbours had amongst other things 36 yes 36 cats who all used garden to shit on daily.

Came to point where I had enough gathered load up and posted on letter box. Long story short i made them clear it all up every day before kids got up. Not unreasonable in my eyes.

The house was just normal size semi. Anyway as they stopped clearing up rang council they had to get rid of 33.

One night after being out came home early hours of morning d*unk the neighbour was sat on lawn with a sketch pad drawing pic of a hedgehog that was not actually there.

Apologies for length of post but this is dhort version.

Anyone else with nutty neighbours?

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

No...

But maybe my neighbours would claim that I was nutty

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By *uppy ConquerorMan
over a year ago

dundee

my neighbours dog bit me and i had to spend two days in hospital getting it sewed up. when i got out instead of asking if i was ok, she thought she would start shouting at me in the street saying i had bit myself. she had the dog with her at this time and it was going nuts. i told her to get the dog away to fuck and put a muzzle on it. about a month later i got a letter from her soliciter saying she was taking a interdict out on me to keep me away from the dog

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No can't compete with any of the above. Had some unpleasant selfish bitchy neighbours but nothing like you guys

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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can get cat pepper

Works really well keeping them off

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well "

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My neighbour from my first house, when he got back from his honeymoon, the first thing he said to me was ..."guess what present my wife gave me... A dose of the clap". He tried to set fire to the place, regularly had temper tantrums and smashed the place up. Was arrested 5 times. I'd hears he hung himself about 10 years later. Which is sad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone call the RSPCA

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

"Someone call the RSPCA

For me?

why?

Its hot mustard not like putting a cat in a bit it can't get out of or throwing boiling water or putting out poisoned food.

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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable.

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By *lentyoffun40Couple
over a year ago

Lancashire

[Removed by poster at 20/01/14 09:20:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of.

Abusing animals is never acceptable. "

Not sure why people think it is acceptable to abuse animals because they are simply doing what they need to do.

It's a cat, its needs to shit it is shitting in a place that it simply feels is suitable. It is not targeting you and is not aware it is a garden you use to grow things or play in.

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By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable. "

Sorry to be self centred but if any animal turns my garden into its midden then I will do whatever is required to shift them on. If I can do it without doing permanent harm to the creature I will but it not Ill have the pests killed because feces carries and is a breeding place of disease.

I am sorry if you dont understand or agree with this, but its called enlightened self interest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable.

I am sorry if you dont understand or agree with this, but its called enlightened self interest. "

Animal abuse. pure and simple

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

" One night after being out came home early hours of morning d*unk the neighbour was sat on lawn with a sketch pad drawing pic of a hedgehog that was not actually there.

Sorry but this made me

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

I had a nutty neighbour he would be up all night singing and sending his mum's chair lift up and down the stairs. One day I saw him and had ago at him. He said he was mental and if he had a car he would gas himself. I got my ex hubby's car keys handed them to him and said if you wait for me to go to the garden , I will get you ca hosepipe. The

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

As for the cat shit problem, I don't use the pepper 1) they would just hold their nose as they kept doing their business in my garden.

2) I have a dog and kids and that stuff worries me.

I use orange peel and that has cut it right down. Hardly any poo now

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By *lentyoffun40Couple
over a year ago

Lancashire

When I first moved into my house it was a bad winter with heavy snow

I saw the old lady who lives opposite me struggling getting up her drive let alone get her car out the garage

I went across and cleared the whole drive . Her path and doorstep . Even did her back pathway ( no pun intended)

She told all my neighbours about the lovely lad who moved in the area

2 days later , the snow had cleared and my car was parked about a foot over her entrance to drive

She came across and knocked on

I said hello how are you ? Only to be subjected to a barrage of abuse about blocking her drive !!

I was flabbergasted!

I have since cleared her drive of snow on many occasions and often drop her off in town To save her catching the bus

What still makes me chuckle is this

One day a few years ago . I was on holiday and my mate was looking after my house

His relatives .. All friends if mine decided to play a prank and emptied my house of everything . I mean everything

The lady across the street never said a word ..my mate said she even offered is a brew !!! Pmsl

She's a tad nutty and grumpy sometimes

But I'll miss her when she's gone !!

As for the knob head next door .. He's another story !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So pleased that I have no neighbours. I can do what I like when I like. In the summer I was out picking apples naked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The lady two doors down from us hasn't set foot outside of her house in the twenty years we've been here, not even into her garden. Her husband is a jolly bloke but completely bonkers. Their daughter, who is about forty, hasn't spoke to us in fifteen years. We were having a BBQ one summer and she shouted out her window that we were all savages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As for cats pooing in your garden. My neighbours cat used to do it all the time. We then started feeding it. Not too much but we'd put a bowl out near to where it would poo. It soon stopped doing its business in our garden. They don't like to shit where they eat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable.

I am sorry if you dont understand or agree with this, but its called enlightened self interest. "

I do understand it is frustrating, there are no laws to prevent cats doing anything but there are laws against animal abuse.

However, if you did anything to my cat I'd not be held responsible for my actions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My neighbours are quite normal , only problem is they borrow stuff and never return it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable.

I am sorry if you dont understand or agree with this, but its called enlightened self interest.

I do understand it is frustrating, there are no laws to prevent cats doing anything but there are laws against animal abuse.

However, if you did anything to my cat I'd not be held responsible for my actions."

Id return the favour in kind. Perhaps apply the hot mustard with a wire brush before making him lick his own arse.

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By *imjohnCouple
over a year ago

Clacton on sea, Essex

[Removed by poster at 20/01/14 10:12:00]

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By *imjohnCouple
over a year ago

Clacton on sea, Essex

Our neighbours are great as they know we shoot a lot of naughty stuff at home with lots of people coming & going & that we are swingers, no one cares we all get on very well & help each other out when the need arises.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well

Years ago i had a cat that used my garden as a toilet...

Tried pepper didn't work

Then was told another way to get rid...

It worked!

Made up some very hot horseradish mustard got hold of cat and smeared it on its backside...

The cat jumped (scratched me but so) made a mewling sound and ran about 10 feet...

Slid to a halt and lifted a leg and licked itself clean...

Went stiff as a board shook its head screamed and ran...

Never saw it again...

Poor cat. That's nothing to be proud of. Abusing animals is never acceptable.

I am sorry if you dont understand or agree with this, but its called enlightened self interest.

I do understand it is frustrating, there are no laws to prevent cats doing anything but there are laws against animal abuse.

However, if you did anything to my cat I'd not be held responsible for my actions.

Id return the favour in kind. Perhaps apply the hot mustard with a wire brush before making him lick his own arse.

Class

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Re the cat woman sprinkle black pepper on all your flower beds and areas they toilet on they won't come back works for dogs as well "

none of remedies like that worked.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" One night after being out came home early hours of morning d*unk the neighbour was sat on lawn with a sketch pad drawing pic of a hedgehog that was not actually there.

Sorry but this made me

She was nuts. She had been in the garden two hiurs apparently. When i saw her i thiught i was more d*unk than i was.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tried pepper, didnt work so I stuck loads of plastic forks in the flower bed so it would be too uncomfortable for the cat to sit in it. It worked! I forgot to tell my friends though and they came round and thought id done it as a garden feature! !

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By *ouisa mWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I lived with a girl once who used to bring home homeless people because she felt sorry for them. If she really pitied them, she'd give them her bed and she'd sleep on the couch

Otherwise we'd all wake up to random d*unks in our living room or going through our fridge!!

Landlord refused to evict her cos she always paid her rent!!

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