FabSwingers.com forum: Chat Room Cliques

By *ockwell Dominus OP Man
over a year ago

Birstall

I have not been into the chat room on here for quite some time but a couple of friends said I should go in as it was alot of fun.

I went in the General Chat room today and found it to be quite exclusive and hostile towards new male chatters. I expected to find a jolly room with banter and a nice friendly atmosphere but instead I found I was most definitely not welcome.

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yeap, I have, never go in there now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate the chat rooms, can't have a decent converstation anyway imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have not been into the chat room on here for quite some time but a couple of friends said I should go in as it was alot of fun.

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

Its not just the males who feel that way,thats why we dont use the chat rooms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

definately can be very cliquey....unless you're pushy enough to but in on others conversations!! lol

its usually the same people chatting the same bollox and have you noticed how all the females are stunning!!! yeah right!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes iam afraid that is very true you seem to have the regular ppl in there showing there part of for everybody to see me thinks that how most get there kicks on here.Playing on cam.And if you dont your not one of them.So iam not one of them lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there are cliques i think in every chat room on the internet, its the same with the forum usual cliques as well. try a different chat room try the lobby or the welsh room, usually they welcome ppl as long as they chatting hun good luck anyway kitts x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have tried a few times but got a bit board after 30 mins. You have to concentrate all the time and still miss bits so gave it up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im okay i type all day at work so can keep up, got day off today tho chill out time lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"im okay i type all day at work so can keep up, got day off today tho chill out time lol"

Your lucky like Lou but i am pretty slow with the keyboard. I need teaching

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"im okay i type all day at work so can keep up, got day off today tho chill out time lol"

It's not about keeping up with typing for me, more keeping up with reading, you always have to pay attention... whereas in the forum you can go and find whatever was said later on.

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

i feel the same about the chat rooms as well.. you go in say hello to all and your lucky if you get a reply from anyone........ i very seldom go in as feel you dont get made welcome at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant see how they can type so quick what with one hand on their cocks its good to go in and have a perv though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to agree that the Genral room is a bit cliquey, though lobby and (particularly wales) are lovely (kitts

) I have had more meets out of the chat room than by mail, so that says something.

The chat rooms are often filled with blokes without cams, or when they do have a cam it's a 'cock cam' or as was said, making sychophantic comments to the ladies. So the girls don't take any notice of 'another one'.

If u are there to chat, be nice and make witty comments, have your cam on ur face and people will start to include u after a few days. Just keep pushing and people will notice u.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very rarely i use chat i cant keep up and felt it very clique!! one or two people spoke but was mainly dominated by a select few!

def prefer the forums personally xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a fem is on cam they'll talk, that tells you all you need to know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have to say that I too found the chatrooms here a waste of time. The clique members must be knackered when they're finished, not relaxing at all!

When I come on somewhere like this I want to relax, chill, not have to have my eyes glued to the screen every second!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its all each to their own. A clique is just people who know each other.

I use the chat rooms every day and make sure I say hi to everyone who comes on and introduces themselves. If they dont speak then who can blame people for not making contact.

Over the time I have been on Fab I have used the Forum and Chat and at the moment I find Chat more to my taste. Also for the comments further up. You will find that one of the rooms is a Directing Room. If people want to show their bodies etc why the hell not. After all this is a swinging site not a Sunday School site.

As for another comment up there, well I would say this it it. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder, one mans meat etc. Perhaps others see something that the person who made the comment didnt.

At the end of the day you get good and bad on Chat or Forum, you just have to find what suits you.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

You only get out what you put in.

Everyone is new at some point. When I (mrs) started using chat rooms years ago I soon realised that if I was going to be a wallflower and wait for people to speak to me, I probably wouldn't get anywhere, so I butted in to anyone and everyones conversation and eventually people chat and answer you.

Just saying hello in chat may get missed, so I would keep trying.

All those people in the "clique" people talk about didn't know each other at first either.

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By *ebzStarWoman
over a year ago

Notting

I went in there the other night to try out my new webcam.

Was scared - so quickly flashed me tits and ran out again, lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Exactly Rugby you have hit the nail on the head. I remember going to a club for the first time. At the end Patrick and I sat by a couple. Pat got up to go for a smoke and I was left by myself. So I introduced myself to them and got talking. I asked how they were enjoying their first experience of a club. They replied that they found it very cliquey and no one spoke to them. I replied that at that precise moment I was a woman sitting on my own striking up conversation with them. And as Rugby said you only get out of things what you put in

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol @ debs flashing

Pussy, I am going to frame that, I think it is the first time I have seen your serious !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I went in there the other night to try out my new webcam.

Was scared - so quickly flashed me tits and ran out again, lol"

Aww and you didn't invite all the forumites to come have a perve!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U know why am having a serious moment Rugby?? Am not well and cant go on Chat room and show me tits and muff off

so am on forum to torment the feckin life out of ya all

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"U know why am having a serious moment Rugby?? Am not well and cant go on Chat room and show me tits and muff off

so am on forum to torment the feckin life out of ya all"

God help us !

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"U know why am having a serious moment Rugby?? Am not well and cant go on Chat room and show me tits and muff off

so am on forum to torment the feckin life out of ya all"

Be afraid, be very afraid lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"U know why am having a serious moment Rugby?? Am not well and cant go on Chat room and show me tits and muff off

so am on forum to torment the feckin life out of ya all"

So Scotland chat room is safe from you for another few days?

Seriously though hope you get well soon babes we miss the cheeky pussy... we're planning your Scotland tour for the shagmobile!

xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often find the chatrooms very fast so I go in at stupid o'clock when there are less people online.

I was lucky tho I had a friend who went in with me (he was used to the speed of the rooms cos he was a chat mod on another site) and he made sure I had a rough idea what I was doing, now I just need to remember how to whisper and not muck it up, and pluck up the courage to go in at this time of day when more people are online and in the rooms.

Shona

x x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often find the chatrooms very fast so I go in at stupid o'clock when there are less people online.

Shona

x x x "

sit in the quiet corner with me and I'll hold your hand xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cliques or a bunch of 'friends' who chat with each other ?

If you walked into a pub that you've never been into in your life, does everyone stop what they're doing and talk to you ?

Of course they don't, but that'll be cos they're all in a clique aren't they and you are not welcome

Bottom line - join in the chat, yes the chat usually comprises of a total load of incoherent bollox, so all you need to do is add you tuppence worth and eventually you'll be one of the percieved clique

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laine can you see me sitting in the quiet corner??

And anyway you dragged me into the chat with loads of people last time I was in the Scotland room at the same time as you

Shona

x x x

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By *riapus4uMan
over a year ago

Charlestown, Cornwall

I found the same problem in Genral chat room, I don't use the Directing chat as it tends to lock up my computer, the 'new' chat room is better I think.

But then the 'Lounge' can be cliquey!!

(creeps away to have evening meal).

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By *elleCouple
over a year ago

south-west corner of outer london

Personally, I like the chat rooms, especially the Directing Room, but then I do like a bit of exhibitionism, lol.

I only go on with Dan though, as I can't keep up with reading and typing (and following directions

)

The regulars aren't that cliquey, it's just if you come across them half way through a mad conversation you can feel a bit lost.

Talk to me if you spot me there: I don't bite (mostly

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont go on them myself to be honest I can never keep up and find it hard to even spark conversation. Very clicky!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I (wayne) am in the new chat room now, it seems ok so far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

every room has its cliques ... scotland one too sadly.!!!

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

oh yes the scotland one is very indeed you can go in and not wil say _elle even when you have said ho to everyone in the room

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"oh yes the scotland one is very indeed you can go in and not wil say _elle even when you have said ho to everyone in the room"

i wouldnt talk either if someone called me a ho!!

i love typos!! _usty u win my award for makin me laugh tonite!! xx

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

My tuppence, for what what it's worth (prob about 0.00001p).

I am in the Scotland Room most nights/mornings, usually till about 5am, and I endeavour to say hello to everyone that comes in and invie them into conversation.

Yes it can be difficultand intimidating when "friends" that speak to each other every night are in, but I would never preclude anyone from a conversation.

Hell, I even find myself after a few months on here (OK not that long really) going into chat and feeling out of place and out of my depth.

YES, it is scary, YES it is a case of jumping in feet first, but we've all been newbies and we need to remember how it was the first time we dipped our toes in the water.

SORRY - that probably didn't come across how I meant it to, but what I mean to say is don't be scared, the water ain't that cold and someone will always throw you a lifebelt

SHUTTING UP now cos my champagne is running out xx

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

yes a typo butits true you go in and chat and just sit there after you have said hi and no body even has manners to acknowledge you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a look recently but thought it didn't look as good as the forums.

I used to be in a bbw chat room with a voice chat option as well as the usual typing. Only one person could speak at a time, but it worked really well. I loved the different regional accents and personalities. Perhaps Fabs will have summat like that some day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the hiya and very fiew folk then actual talk does not just happen to "newbies" ....we been here over 2 years and still get it sometimes.

And when you say something about no one speaking or answering you when you type ....you get labbled a MOANER!!.....

if asking for manners by way of an answer is moaning, then i'll moan till the cows come home !!.....lol

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"yes a typo butits true you go in and chat and just sit there after you have said hi and no body even has manners to acknowledge you"

If all anyone does is go into chat and 'just sit there' after just saying hi then I am not surprised you feel like people are ignoring you.

You have got to make an effort yourself to get involved and not just expect everyone to come flocking to you just because you enter the chat room and say hi - would it happen in a packed pub/club? I think not!

Make an effort to join in conversations, start your own conversation with people and basically put something into chat instead of 'just sitting there' then people will get to know you and chat to you more.

Just the tuppence worth of someone who makes an effort in chat to actually chat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually just sit banning people - that tends to provoke conversation

Joking

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For the first few weeks of going into the chat room I used to just sit and say hi and bye to everyone, my typing was so slow that I couldn't keep up even with that... it got to the stage when the room was busy I'd see who everyone was saying hi to and copy them!

I persevered and eventually engaged in actual conversations with folk, even now I find if I'm not in the chat room for a few days that there are new people, and I have to make an effort to engage in conversations again.

It IS like being in your local, the more you go in, the more people get to know you and chat with you.

I still have difficulty typing fast enough to keep up with all the convos going on at once and I'm a mod!

Persevere and you will get there.

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By *edhot4blkCouple
over a year ago

York/London/Crantock

As we are members of 4 sites such as this and use the chatrooms on all 4 sites we have found its always the same people in the clique but just using different names, so it would seem its the few spoiling it for the many..

in the general room on this site i saw one day a room fall out and a certain few ganged up on a member, one of the few said to this poor guy ""its our room and dont u forget it "" with that i never went into the chatrooms on this site again...

the rooms on this site arent owned by anyone they are provided by the site to use by all not just the honoured few and the few should remember this...

what we all have to remember is ...we are all different and as such want different things so if we dont all fall into what the chatroom clique feels we should they should leave the few that want to have fun alone...to let them have fun in their own way...

stella..xxxx

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By *ardnWettCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

Absolute waste of time its like being a naughty child u r effectively sent to stand in the corridor, big thumbs down.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

"Absolute waste of time its like being a naughty child u r effectively sent to stand in the corridor, big thumbs down.

I was in the Scottish Chatroom till 5am ish today and was never once sent to any naughty corner. Mainly because I join in the conversations, say hello to people who come into the room (be they newbies or people i have got to know) and have a laugh and a good time with everyone in the room.

There are those that do forget they are not in the Directing Room, but a wee polite reminder to them usually gets most to stop and some even say sorry

If you put nothing in you will get nothing back

Again just my tuppence worth!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the hiya and very fiew folk then actual talk does not just happen to "newbies" ....we been here over 2 years and still get it sometimes.

And when you say something about no one speaking or answering you when you type ....you get labbled a MOANER!!.....

if asking for manners by way of an answer is moaning, then i'll moan till the cows come home !!.....lol"

As has been said many times before, sometimes chat flows so fast that people often get missed when saying hi. It's not being rude, it's the fact that if you are like me and cannot touch type, you take your eyes off the screen to type and a whole page of chat can whizz by.

I usually just say one 'hi' to the room now when it is busy, that way no-one feels excluded, and I don't feel bad if I miss them.

Equally I don't feel bad if I don't get a hi from everyone, I just think will catch them later if we have something of relevance to say to each other.

Not everyone feels like entering into certain topics of conversation and are happy to just watch the chat whizz by, watch cams or listen to music through the cams etc.

Again like in the pub... you want company but are happy in your quiet time when there.

Laine xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

laine was one of the few people in chat who spoke to me and im grateful for it but its def not for me i prefer here as i like many topics at once x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went into the chat room during my forum ban and i just couldn't get back into it. Like i have said before its way too fast and you cannot really get a good convo going.

I use another swinging sites chatroom and its way much better and you can also chat in private.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I have always been in chatrooms even had my own on an international site for 4 years. Every chat room i have been in have been great until i joined fab. Now im talking about the general chat room here. Every time i went in i would have to repeatedly say hello for maybe one person to answer, everyone spoke to "there friends" usually underlining what they where saying. Mods never greated newbies but where watching chat as they where very quick to point out the rules when i say rules people where repremanded for things like HEllo when it was obvious the cap lock had stuck and other such like. Its the only site i never use the chat room on. I know people come on the forums and say they are cliquey but once someone has posted once or twice they are soon recongnized. Im afraid the chatroom (general) is not a good advertisment for this fantastic site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I know people come on the forums and say they are cliquey but once someone has posted once or twice they are soon recongnized. "

I'd agree with that, perseverance (sp)with the forums definately pays off

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

They're only cliques until you're IN...

(apologies to the person I sent this to privately - imbecilic error!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"(apologies to the person I sent this to privately - imbecilic error!)"

LOL I did wonder

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Move along, nothing to see here....

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

definately not just a single male thing...we try and try to get chatting in the rooms but the regulars just bulldoze everyone elses conversation out of the way..

They only seem to be interested in what they want to talk about.

Two weeks running now we have asks repeatedly if our sound is audible in the rooms...not one single reply

Its got to the point now where we just cant be bothered trying.

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By *b430Man
over a year ago

Tayside

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

definately not just a single male thing...we try and try to get chatting in the rooms but the regulars just bulldoze everyone elses conversation out of the way..

They only seem to be interested in what they want to talk about.

Two weeks running now we have asks repeatedly if our sound is audible in the rooms...not one single reply

Its got to the point now where we just cant be bothered trying.

They would need to be viewing your cam and listening to your audio for them to know whether they could hear it or not. Just because you have it on it doesn't mean it is audible to everyone in the chatroom.

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By *.d.f.cMan
over a year ago

exeter

Had a ball for the last 24hrs in chat rooms. Sometimes i was missed, even ignored but most the time got chattin. Just b assertive & remember it is a fickle world, u r loved 1 minute & forgotten the next - lol. Oh yes, i loved cammin it - afterall isn't that what the D Room is for? x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Oh yes, i loved cammin it - afterall isn't that what the D Room is for? x "

actualy if you check the rules you can go on camera , even have rampant sex on camera, in ANY of the rooms.

All you have to remember is which room your in ....ie don't ask people what they want to see you do, or tell folks what to do when viewing them on thier cameras.......those two acts are ONLY allowed in the directing room .

have fun ....and happy swinging....lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

definately not just a single male thing...we try and try to get chatting in the rooms but the regulars just bulldoze everyone elses conversation out of the way..

They only seem to be interested in what they want to talk about.

Two weeks running now we have asks repeatedly if our sound is audible in the rooms...not one single reply

Its got to the point now where we just cant be bothered trying.

How did they get to be regulars that are listened to ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have not been into the chat room on here for quite some time but a couple of friends said I should go in as it was alot of fun.

I wondered if anyone else had experienced the same type of exclusion or if I was just unlucky to go in at lunchtime when people may have been crazed with hunger and so came across as hostile.

Its not just the males who feel that way,thats why we dont use the chat rooms."

Same here!

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

"Had a ball for the last 24hrs in chat rooms. Sometimes i was missed, even ignored but most the time got chattin. Just b assertive & remember it is a fickle world, u r loved 1 minute & forgotten the next - lol. Oh yes, i loved cammin it - afterall isn't that what the D Room is for? x "

And most importantly...remember to whip the puppies out...that ups your chances by a good 50%

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