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Get real ladies - a rant from the single man's perspective!

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By *oy rider OP   Man
over a year ago

Bridgnorth

OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It is the way it is.... And ain't going to change anytime soon.

Just don't dance to it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think a précis of that would be 'man pissed off that ugly, fat old women can demand sex with virile fit young chaps'.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cool story bro.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed-fat ugly birds like me should be thankful I get any attention at all and to thank all the men, I should drop my knickers for anyone.

crystal

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice long message but you must realize the women on here don't spend all day on here.

If they were to reply to everyone, it would take them all day, they get 100s of messages so reading all, checking profiles, and replying to all is asking far too much.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't hold back now

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got about a third down and got bored sorry

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

It's not a god given right to press delete but it is a right and an option according to the site guidelines.

I am not amongst the women who receive 100s of messages. I could respond to all of them individually. In fact I used to with a polite no thanks. I found that it does cost to be polite. Not only did it open the door for them to keep sending messages until I blocked them, it also allowed them to send abuse that I should be grateful at my age and state of ordinariness to have received a message from them.

Let's not forget the same men/people who create new profiles with the same photos to send you another message. I am not replying to them again.

I have learned that putting the wants/dos and don't messages on my profile doesn't work so they are not there. It doesn't mean I will say yes to everyone.

Now, I agree with you that SOME people (not just women) have unrealistic expectations of people on this site and are a tad delusional about themselves. However, the women I might think of like that are very well verified and get more meets than I do. So perhaps they aren't being unrealistic and there are men that value them and their sensuality.

As to the rather sweeping statement that women don't age well - bollocks!

Merry Christmas and Happy Swinging.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a merry christmas

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Supply and demand

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow! Really?!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

popcorn anyone??

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *r Mahogany70Man
over a year ago

Leicester

I salute you, Joy rider

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nice long message but you must realize the women on here don't spend all day on here.

If they were to reply to everyone, it would take them all day, they get 100s of messages so reading all, checking profiles, and replying to all is asking far too much.

"

I hope you are being sarcastic there as not all women get 100's messages per day

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well this fat middle aged bitch ain't done too badly in the 'tall, young, virile, hung, ripped and good looking' stakes over the years

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cor blimey mate! Merry Christmas and a happy new year.

...that's just fab. We can't do nowt about it.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

so did you want a shag or not?

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"popcorn anyone??

"

Popcorn isn't necessary. He's made his _iews clear and I read it all the way to end.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half.... "

Dispute all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I always think when I read these rants that its obviously got to the point that sex has become so important to the poster that all other things have become less important. If that was the case with me, if I felt anger and frustration when my messages are deleted without reply, I know its time to get off the site and get a sense of proportion. Sex is nice. Sex is fun. Sex feels great. But it should not be something we have to have to be happy.

And yes, I do get my messages deleted without reply. As one of those 'all-powerful' single women (don't make me laugh!) I have also been turned down by men. And that's fine, because they read my profile and decided I was not what they were after. So I shrug and move on.

No-one is entitled to anything on here. Not a wink, a message, a reply, or even a shag! I know I know, how very dare we show discernment in the men we let between our legs. But for something so personal and intimate surely I should be able to pick a man who is attractive to me, physically and mentally? Or is it only one way on here and us women 'of a certain age' should be grateful for any attention we receive?

TL:DR - take a chill pill mate. This is supposed to be fun.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

Dispute all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage "

Dispite* (stupid fat fingers)

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

This, fat, non-spring chicken doesn't make demands in the way you list them as I'm sure nor do a lot of, if not all demand too much and if we do well, don't speak to us.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's not a god given right to press delete but it is a right and an option according to the site guidelines.

I am not amongst the women who receive 100s of messages. I could respond to all of them individually. In fact I used to with a polite no thanks. I found that it does cost to be polite. Not only did it open the door for them to keep sending messages until I blocked them, it also allowed them to send abuse that I should be grateful at my age and state of ordinariness to have received a message from them.

Let's not forget the same men/people who create new profiles with the same photos to send you another message. I am not replying to them again.

I have learned that putting the wants/dos and don't messages on my profile doesn't work so they are not there. It doesn't mean I will say yes to everyone.

Now, I agree with you that SOME people (not just women) have unrealistic expectations of people on this site and are a tad delusional about themselves. However, the women I might think of like that are very well verified and get more meets than I do. So perhaps they aren't being unrealistic and there are men that value them and their sensuality.

As to the rather sweeping statement that women don't age well - bollocks!

Merry Christmas and Happy Swinging."

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half.... "

Sure....us ladies ain't all that. We're ignorant, don't give the fuglies a chance, quick to delete and should be grateful for any shag we get

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally disagree with pretty much the whole post in afraid!

Who people want to meet us their preference.

The age, body style, physical attributes and sex of who someone meets is their preference.

Who people choose to reply to or block is their preference.

What people write in their profiles is their preference.

It always appears to be those being rejected, ignored or simply not having their 'expectations' met that feel the need to have a dig at others - be they single of either sex or couple.

Those having fun, engaging with others via messages, forums, clubs, socials and meets - must be far too busy to moan!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I think a précis of that would be 'man pissed off that ugly, fat old women can demand sex with virile fit young chaps'.

"

...and get it!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *arumcoupleCouple
over a year ago

salisbury

Guess he ment to say "Pissed off of derby"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got as far as this bit...

'Men can handle being told you're not interested' then lost the will to read further! However I'm sure your in box will be inundated after that short outburst!

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester

Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

You need to accept that not everyone has manners and that being rude is down to character , so those who block or delete you are probably doing you a favour..........

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

I got about half way before i gave up..


"Cool story bro."

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

WOW! Someone's not a happy bunny!

Oh and you can breath now

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts


"I got as far as this bit...

'Men can handle being told you're not interested' then lost the will to read further! However I'm sure your in box will be inundated after that short outburst! "

it probably will be bulging with mail .... but not offers of a shag methinks

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go you

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block .............."

So do men. There are no features on this site that are 'women only'.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got as far as this bit...

'Men can handle being told you're not interested' then lost the will to read further! However I'm sure your in box will be inundated after that short outburst! "

Blimey you got further than me

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow what an epic hope he feels better after that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I add that the ratio is 400 men to 1 women lol

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"I always think when I read these rants that its obviously got to the point that sex has become so important to the poster that all other things have become less important. If that was the case with me, if I felt anger and frustration when my messages are deleted without reply, I know its time to get off the site and get a sense of proportion. Sex is nice. Sex is fun. Sex feels great. But it should not be something we have to have to be happy.

And yes, I do get my messages deleted without reply. As one of those 'all-powerful' single women (don't make me laugh!) I have also been turned down by men. And that's fine, because they read my profile and decided I was not what they were after. So I shrug and move on.

No-one is entitled to anything on here. Not a wink, a message, a reply, or even a shag! I know I know, how very dare we show discernment in the men we let between our legs. But for something so personal and intimate surely I should be able to pick a man who is attractive to me, physically and mentally? Or is it only one way on here and us women 'of a certain age' should be grateful for any attention we receive?

TL:DR - take a chill pill mate. This is supposed to be fun."

Exactly! I have been deleted without response and I have been turned down when sending messages. That's exactly as it should be: if I don't meet what that man is looking for that is his choice.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

...And then he had a wank and all was right with the world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got as far as this bit...

'Men can handle being told you're not interested' then lost the will to read further! However I'm sure your in box will be inundated after that short outburst!

Blimey you got further than me "

Ha ha I was feeling generous

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By *uietlykinkymeWoman
over a year ago

kinky land

Sweeping statements anyone?

I wonder if admin will pop up with their 'no reply is a reply' & if you concentrate on those that are interested you will have more fun on this site

I do love how the rants in here never actually apply to the majority of users on the forums

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Totally disagree with pretty much the whole post in afraid!

Who people want to meet us their preference.

The age, body style, physical attributes and sex of who someone meets is their preference.

Who people choose to reply to or block is their preference.

What people write in their profiles is their preference.

It always appears to be those being rejected, ignored or simply not having their 'expectations' met that feel the need to have a dig at others - be they single of either sex or couple.

Those having fun, engaging with others via messages, forums, clubs, socials and meets - must be far too busy to moan!

"

Oh I moan, but it's the fit, virile, hot as fuck single men I meet on here buried between my fat thighs that cause it to be fair!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As to the rather sweeping statement that women don't age well - bollocks!

Merry Christmas and Happy Swinging."

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

after reading his rant i think the man has a point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What happened in here then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well done mister....no one is 19 anymore, I never rate myself as something better,or demand the six pack.

However I do believe the single bloke gets the raw end of the deal, there is no single blokes on our profile, but that is simply as we are looking in other areas, and I have to note there are a lot of _iews, but each and everyone reads the profile, it is obvious.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

You need to accept that not everyone has manners and that being rude is down to character , so those who block or delete you are probably doing you a favour.......... "

Aaah shucks, I didn't know ignoring men outwith my criteria was rude...shame...on...me!

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

So do men. There are no features on this site that are 'women only'."

Absolutely ......we all have equal rights and choices and our own unique preferences .............viva la difference....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well said joyrider .it does make you laugh sometimes .that women have such long arsed profiles. like a shopping list for mr perfect..size shape . stamina .etc etc but my favourite one today was a woman on here no face pic .stating im a bit hypocritical but no face pic no reply .no face pic no bloody message .is what she got .or to sydney university these pictures are private and I will take legal action.ffs grow up why would they want pictures of you your rotten .and your showing he bloody world allready

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't worry it will soon be Christmas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well this post is really gonna help us single guys on here....NOT

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a précis of that would be 'man pissed off that ugly, fat old women can demand sex with virile fit young chaps'.

...and get it! "

Mmmm I've had some

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"after reading his rant i think the man has a point "

Please do elaborate.

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By *errynjuneCouple
over a year ago

Barnsley

Hope they do this in a spoken version. Read out aloud by the wonderful Stephen Fry I bet it would sound soothing.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I hope you feel better for getting it off of your chest. Personally I think everyone can put anything they like on their profile and if it works for them, then fair enough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bless OP's cotton socks .

And at men ageing better than women as a blanket statement.

I'll continue with my long list as it's working

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahaha well said!!...I wonder how they'd do on Plenty of Fish?

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

You need to accept that not everyone has manners and that being rude is down to character , so those who block or delete you are probably doing you a favour..........

Aaah shucks, I didn't know ignoring men outwith my criteria was rude...shame...on...me! "

Ignoring men or messages ...........

Freedom of choice , but I would always reply to anyone ..........ok , I don't get many , but to those that do message and do not fit my criteria I would let them and have let them down politely............if I had lots ............block delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've not been in the forums for a while....but boy I'm so glad I came back.

Oh and yes I'm a fat old bird, but you know what....I've got exactly what I want from here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hahaha well said!!...I wonder how they'd do on Plenty of Fish?"

My pof list works too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great story

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hope they do this in a spoken version. Read out aloud by the wonderful Stephen Fry I bet it would sound soothing. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*twists open his Xmas day single malt whilst resting it on his huge washboard ab!!

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

Can i buy the script .would make a moving screen play. X x X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

Who is John Holmes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok own up %

Who turned the OP down with a

" no thanks " message?

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester


"Can i buy the script .would make a moving screen play. X x X"

Can you hear the violinist..........

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

This site works in different ways for different people at different times. Due to that very difference, things are not going to be what one wants all the time.

Roll with the flow, man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok own up %

Who turned the OP down with a

" no thanks " message? "

No one...they just blocked him

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By *cottishsexgoddessWoman
over a year ago

Glenrothes


"I got about a third down and got bored sorry "

My first reaction was then I had the same reaction as above!!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's not a god given right to press delete but it is a right and an option according to the site guidelines.

I am not amongst the women who receive 100s of messages. I could respond to all of them individually. In fact I used to with a polite no thanks. I found that it does cost to be polite. Not only did it open the door for them to keep sending messages until I blocked them, it also allowed them to send abuse that I should be grateful at my age and state of ordinariness to have received a message from them.

Let's not forget the same men/people who create new profiles with the same photos to send you another message. I am not replying to them again.

I have learned that putting the wants/dos and don't messages on my profile doesn't work so they are not there. It doesn't mean I will say yes to everyone.

Now, I agree with you that SOME people (not just women) have unrealistic expectations of people on this site and are a tad delusional about themselves. However, the women I might think of like that are very well verified and get more meets than I do. So perhaps they aren't being unrealistic and there are men that value them and their sensuality.

As to the rather sweeping statement that women don't age well - bollocks!

Merry Christmas and Happy Swinging."

Here here!! Couldnt have worded it btr myself...

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By *W69Couple
over a year ago

Bournemouth

Wow...just before Christmas!

Everybody's entitled to share their _iews and opinions in an open forum, and clearly you have thought a lot about what you wanted to write.

Appreciate in your subject line you use the word "rant" which in itself does not necessairly require/imply that this thread will obtain any further input or discussion from yourself.

If you choose to acknowledge the points mentioned above it is obviously your prerogative but can see a lot of women/men and couples not being happy (to put it mildly) about being typecast with the same behaviour brush.

Swinging suicide as you put it, maybe, but only time will tell. Guess from here its about how you respond if you choose to do that and how it may/may not affect your chances of fun after openly sharing your "_iews".

It was the women not ageing well reference that got our goat up....Grrr

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By *riskynriskyCouple
over a year ago

Essex.

We are middle of the road (hopefully) who have been ignored and very occasionally ignored others....

The short answer to your rant is.....

Supply and demand....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was on another thread, talking to myself, evidently; I was wondering where everyone went!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Amazing as frustrating as it is women will always have the power when it comes to sex if you dont like it tough shit I suggest you start doing jigsaws or some other hobby I dont think this one suits you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Took me two reads (bloody hard work) to realise the Op is basically moaning that he gets deleted and blocked when he sends messages to some ladies.

Looking at the foot stamping, self centered, spoiled and childish rant that he aims at the site in general, why would anyone NOT block......who wants that garbage sent to them directly.

He's nowhere near me, but I've blocked him now in case he ever notices my profile!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Totally disagree with pretty much the whole post in afraid!

Who people want to meet us their preference.

The age, body style, physical attributes and sex of who someone meets is their preference.

Who people choose to reply to or block is their preference.

What people write in their profiles is their preference.

It always appears to be those being rejected, ignored or simply not having their 'expectations' met that feel the need to have a dig at others - be they single of either sex or couple.

Those having fun, engaging with others via messages, forums, clubs, socials and meets - must be far too busy to moan!

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This site is frustrating for everyone at times and nobody likes rejection/bruises from.barge poles etc.

The site reflects society, good folk, complete wankers and downright shysters. Good lookers, average lookers who.see themselves as gorgeous and people who dont bat above the average.

I am just fortunate as George Clooneys stunt double with a twelve incher( dont boast as a rule! ) that I constantly beat off supermodels with a shitty stick. " whats that Heff', ?? Nicoles got the cocktails shaken....on my way.m8!!"

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By *opping_candyWoman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire

If I get to a certain age and can get young fit well endowed intelligent studs to service my desires then I'll bloody well do it! Or does being a fat bird mean I'm only allowed to meet similarly shaped menfolk and should feel grateful for each message I get?

I can't believe you just wrote such a long winded rant basically covering the topic of 'why are women so rude and don't reply', a thread which is started on here roughly 3 times a day.

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

Am so horny for the OP now.....

Errr then again no! Wow. Well done. Am amazed you get through life x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

each their own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a précis of that would be 'man pissed off that ugly, fat old women can demand sex with virile fit young chaps'.

...and get it!

Mmmm I've had some "

shes spot on when a big bird knocks you back its a kick in the nuts.but women can pick and choose wno they fuck with ease .its like am old joke 3lads get asked if you could covered in something what would it be john replies gold miss id scratch a bit of and buy a bmw.next lee says platinum miss its worth more than gold id scratch some off and buy a porsche.what a about you tommy PUBIC Hair miss .shocked she asks why .well miss my sister only has a little triangle and she has a bmw a porsche and a rolls royce outside her house most nights

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

All that to whinge about not getting replies.

Wow!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why should they respond to every message? If a woman deleted your message then that's the end of it, move on.

Everything you said btw I'm pretty sure a large number of men do the same thing

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

The odd valid point amongst all this, particularly concerning "tired" individuals with less than reasonable expectations or downright arrogance and rudery, but the question that is left foremost in my mind is: who is John Holmes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you."

its all in good humour .but ive .never known of women with an ear fetish any out there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have also posted similar sentiments expressing amazement at the sense of expectation of some of the women on here ...rants demands and then pan to pics expecting helen of troy and confronted with the gargoyle above the stage at the london palladium. Suppose its best to be sanguine ...lifes not fair ...women exploit our horniness but are governed by .irationality and hormones and age far worse than men ...thats life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't reply to everyone.. Ladies get hundreds of replies.

It's basic economics - more guys equals over supply = falling stock value

Exceptional stock will stand out and has a higher chance of a successful yield (ejaculation)

Man up!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

You need to accept that not everyone has manners and that being rude is down to character , so those who block or delete you are probably doing you a favour..........

Aaah shucks, I didn't know ignoring men outwith my criteria was rude...shame...on...me!

Ignoring men or messages ...........

Freedom of choice , but I would always reply to anyone ..........ok , I don't get many , but to those that do message and do not fit my criteria I would let them and have let them down politely............if I had lots ............block delete. "

When visible my profile doesn't attract many and has a lot of filters. I'm looking to meet tall, straight, single, sub men between 45 and 55, within five miles of West Dulwich who can accommodate and not in a hotel: ever, seeking a fat, black Domme.

Pretty specific don't you think, yet you'd think me rude if I ignored a bi married travelling salesman hold up in a Travel Lodge at Tower Bridge wanting me to give him a blow job.

You may be happy for any kind of contact, me? I'll continue to ignore those not respecting my preferences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you."

Nah he does...that's a pretty brave thing to say...we'll get guys playing the "all women are beautiful card" now trying to score brownie points..but its true...good on ya OP for being honest...still doesn't change anything...its a womens world here...but its still fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why should they respond to every message? If a woman deleted your message then that's the end of it, move on.

Everything you said btw I'm pretty sure a large number of men do the same thing"

This has happened to me. Delete no reply I now don't send messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The odd valid point amongst all this, particularly concerning "tired" individuals with less than reasonable expectations or downright arrogance and rudery, but the question that is left foremost in my mind is: who is John Holmes?

"

70s porn star with massive cock ...died of aids after sleeping with 5000 women and many men ...when contracted the disease cried why me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wonder how many private messages he's getting from blokes in agreement though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you."

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

Sure....us ladies ain't all that. We're ignorant, don't give the fuglies a chance, quick to delete and should be grateful for any shag we get "

Thanks for that... My head was sore at the thought of reading it all xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"*twists open his Xmas day single malt whilst resting it on his huge washboard ab!! "

Not only women that are delusional then!

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village


"I wonder how many private messages he's getting from blokes in agreement though"

Count me out!!!

Sorry OP but there's a big difference between your rant and Jodie's.

Jodie was generic about observations made on the forums from all perspectives and she was funny to be fair.

Yours was basically telling women of a certain age & disposition that they should be thankful anyone can be bothered with them and not at all funny.

Sorry to be blunt but that's how i read it, though i will admit i did switch off half way through reading yours

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By *ayandess1Couple
over a year ago

bridgwater

Here's the deal - 99% of swingers are couples.

Single guys are pretty much surplus to requirements. Very few couples are looking for them, and the few single girls that are on here are normally looking for couples or other women.

That leaves the tiny tiny proportion of couples and singles that might - if they want - hook up with a single male.

Here's the killer - no matter what they look like, no matter how old they are, and no matter how confident they are, women and couples can choose whoever they like. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

The fact is most men will sleep with anyone, so women CAN afford to be choosy.

I am part of a couple, if we split I can tell you this, no way would I ever even think of continuing on this path. Id cut and run. More chance of finding a shag on a proper dating site.

Look at clubs. Single guys are very rarely anything more than walking dildos. I'm not being a dick, its just the facts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

Sure....us ladies ain't all that. We're ignorant, don't give the fuglies a chance, quick to delete and should be grateful for any shag we get

Thanks for that... My head was sore at the thought of reading it all xx "

Basic summary.. whine whine whine!

Man up! Debate resolved.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester


"Great rant .............

But they do have the god given right to delete , block ..............

You need to accept that not everyone has manners and that being rude is down to character , so those who block or delete you are probably doing you a favour..........

Aaah shucks, I didn't know ignoring men outwith my criteria was rude...shame...on...me!

Ignoring men or messages ...........

Freedom of choice , but I would always reply to anyone ..........ok , I don't get many , but to those that do message and do not fit my criteria I would let them and have let them down politely............if I had lots ............block delete.

When visible my profile doesn't attract many and has a lot of filters. I'm looking to meet tall, straight, single, sub men between 45 and 55, within five miles of West Dulwich who can accommodate and not in a hotel: ever, seeking a fat, black Domme.

Pretty specific don't you think, yet you'd think me rude if I ignored a bi married travelling salesman hold up in a Travel Lodge at Tower Bridge wanting me to give him a blow job.

You may be happy for any kind of contact, me? I'll continue to ignore those not respecting my preferences. "

I'm sure there is a plethora of tall, slim , single , submissive guys who can accommodate.......... wanting a fat black Domme within a five mile radius of Dulwich but how would they know you are actually available to them if they can't see your profile ..................

As for me , I respect all profiles and preferences ..........

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By *ex.IncCouple
over a year ago

Castleford

Phew. Can someone pass me a beer? That was a bit steamy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I doubt very much that 99% of people on here are couples. And women can't pick and choose as they wish - it may be balanced towards their favour but don't kid yourself that all women can take their pick.

I don't find single men surplus either, not at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I doubt very much that 99% of people on here are couples. And women can't pick and choose as they wish - it may be balanced towards their favour but don't kid yourself that all women can take their pick.

I don't find single men surplus either, not at all."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have also posted similar sentiments expressing amazement at the sense of expectation of some of the women on here ...rants demands and then pan to pics expecting helen of troy and confronted with the gargoyle above the stage at the london palladium. Suppose its best to be sanguine ...lifes not fair ...women exploit our horniness but are governed by .irationality and hormones and age far worse than men ...thats life "

Go fuck a man then... Plenty to choose from

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My life, my ways, my profile. If others do not like how I operate, it is their problem, not mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"*twists open his Xmas day single malt whilst resting it on his huge washboard ab!!

Not only women that are delusional then! "

Of course not! .......fancy a wee drop?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My life, my ways, my profile. If others do not like how I operate, it is their problem, not mine. "

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By *ayandess1Couple
over a year ago

bridgwater

Ok fair point - exaggeration. Ill slap myself for being a twit.

Alternatively - you can think of a fitting punishment.

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

You suggest women reply to all mails, with a "not interested" if this is the case, but this is when we get the abuse so how does that make sense, we ask for it, but we should still send it and take the abuse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's not a god given right to press delete but it is a right and an option according to the site guidelines.

I am not amongst the women who receive 100s of messages. I could respond to all of them individually. In fact I used to with a polite no thanks. I found that it does cost to be polite. Not only did it open the door for them to keep sending messages until I blocked them, it also allowed them to send abuse that I should be grateful at my age and state of ordinariness to have received a message from them.

Let's not forget the same men/people who create new profiles with the same photos to send you another message. I am not replying to them again.

I have learned that putting the wants/dos and don't messages on my profile doesn't work so they are not there. It doesn't mean I will say yes to everyone.

Now, I agree with you that SOME people (not just women) have unrealistic expectations of people on this site and are a tad delusional about themselves. However, the women I might think of like that are very well verified and get more meets than I do. So perhaps they aren't being unrealistic and there are men that value them and their sensuality.

As to the rather sweeping statement that women don't age well - bollocks!

Merry Christmas and Happy Swinging."

Well said.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ok own up %

Who turned the OP down with a

" no thanks " message?

No one...they just blocked him "

psml

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My life, my ways, my profile. If others do not like how I operate, it is their problem, not mine. "

thanks for that i can't stop singing that crap dance track from the early 90's by Dr alban called its my life

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"I doubt very much that 99% of people on here are couples. And women can't pick and choose as they wish - it may be balanced towards their favour but don't kid yourself that all women can take their pick.

I don't find single men surplus either, not at all."

I am on here to meet single men, not single ladies or couples. And yet that still shouldn't mean I can't have a preference in the guys I meet. And I certainly cannot take my pick. Arranging a one on one meet can be soul destroying for someone with a low self image, and as for getting men to commit to a GB? Forget it.

Having seen some men on here who I previously admired via their forum posts agree with this misogynistic rant I might just stick to clubs from now on. At least the men there choose to shag me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *othingButCocoChanelWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Oh and the OP is "looking for HOT females and couples"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

Lol

I'm seeing you holding the fab swingers award for,

most inappropriate username.

Congratulations.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I doubt very much that 99% of people on here are couples. And women can't pick and choose as they wish - it may be balanced towards their favour but don't kid yourself that all women can take their pick.

I don't find single men surplus either, not at all.

I am on here to meet single men, not single ladies or couples. And yet that still shouldn't mean I can't have a preference in the guys I meet. And I certainly cannot take my pick. Arranging a one on one meet can be soul destroying for someone with a low self image, and as for getting men to commit to a GB? Forget it.

Having seen some men on here who I previously admired via their forum posts agree with this misogynistic rant I might just stick to clubs from now on. At least the men there choose to shag me. "

and what man would not want thee x

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"and what man would not want thee x"

Careful. You might be accused of sucking up to us uggo ladies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow. Somebody needs to get some...

...and has simultaneously turned off every woman on here.

Rod for your own back there OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always reply to my mail, with a polite thanks but no thanks and a reason - if they do not appeal to my brain.

I don't have a list of demands for the men I look for, nor do I expect them to have one for me.

I must be one of the lucky ones x

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well that escalated quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I add that the ratio is 400 m

en to 1 women lol "

I bet there is some truth in that as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cool story bro."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well done mister....no one is 19 anymore, I never rate myself as something better,or demand the six pack.

However I do believe the single bloke gets the raw end of the deal, there is no single blokes on our profile, but that is simply as we are looking in other areas, and I have to note there are a lot of _iews, but each and everyone reads the profile, it is obvious."

I'm 47 next month, and do not put myself under any illusion I'm a spring chicken,but high expectations get you no where, only expect someone genuine, its my motto, that's how it should be for both men and woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What I got from this; "if you let me put my cock in you then I'll kiss your arse, if not then I'll belittle you and your sex in a rant, as you're only attractive as long as I have a chance to get my end in"

Or am I just a cynic?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you.

Nah he does...that's a pretty brave thing to say...we'll get guys playing the "all women are beautiful card" now trying to score brownie points..but its true...good on ya OP for being honest...still doesn't change anything...its a womens world here...but its still fun."

All women are beautiful till they reject you !!!!! Then they are fat ugly old bints that couldn't pull a flasher in the real world ..... But that's fab ! I would say to those who don't like the game ! Don't plAy simples .... And a merry christmas to you all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's the deal - 99% of swingers are couples.

Single guys are pretty much surplus to requirements. Very few couples are looking for them, and the few single girls that are on here are normally looking for couples or other women.

That leaves the tiny tiny proportion of couples and singles that might - if they want - hook up with a single male.

Here's the killer - no matter what they look like, no matter how old they are, and no matter how confident they are, women and couples can choose whoever they like. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

The fact is most men will sleep with anyone, so women CAN afford to be choosy.

I am part of a couple, if we split I can tell you this, no way would I ever even think of continuing on this path. Id cut and run. More chance of finding a shag on a proper dating site.

Look at clubs. Single guys are very rarely anything more than walking dildos. I'm not being a dick, its just the facts. "

Dont count this single guy in the same bracket. Sweeping statements.com

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Oh and the OP is "looking for HOT females and couples" "

They will be hot; at our age the menopause causes havoc with the internal temperature controls.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's the deal - 99% of swingers are couples.

Single guys are pretty much surplus to requirements. Very few couples are looking for them, and the few single girls that are on here are normally looking for couples or other women.

That leaves the tiny tiny proportion of couples and singles that might - if they want - hook up with a single male. Surpus to requirements? Ive had dozens of meets on here mostly with couples

Here's the killer - no matter what they look like, no matter how old they are, and no matter how confident they are, women and couples can choose whoever they like. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

The fact is most men will sleep with anyone, so women CAN afford to be choosy.

I am part of a couple, if we split I can tell you this, no way would I ever even think of continuing on this path. Id cut and run. More chance of finding a shag on a proper dating site.

Look at clubs. Single guys are very rarely anything more than walking dildos. I'm not being a dick, its just the facts. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh and the OP is "looking for HOT females and couples"

They will be hot; at our age the menopause causes havoc with the internal temperature controls.

"

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *ayandess1Couple
over a year ago

bridgwater

Agreed - mine was an inconcieved answer and was probably mostly shite - but the meaning was there.

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By *nJ_NW_cplCouple
over a year ago

wirral

OMG just missed emmerdale reading that. There is a certain amount of truth to parts of it but most comes down to the unsolicited mail thing. As a couple we don’t get hundreds of mails but even so about 75% of what we do get comes from single men when it states quite clearly that we don’t meet single men. When we get post if it hasn’t got our name on it somewhere it goes straight in the bin. xxx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

Ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OMG just missed emmerdale reading that. There is a certain amount of truth to parts of it but most comes down to the unsolicited mail thing. As a couple we don’t get hundreds of mails but even so about 75% of what we do get comes from single men when it states quite clearly that we don’t meet single men. When we get post if it hasn’t got our name on it somewhere it goes straight in the bin. xxx"

Put a filter on then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/12/13 20:52:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It is the way it is.... And ain't going to change anytime soon.

Just don't dance to it.

"

I agree.

I've gone pass caring because the goalposts are forever moving.

If I had to grumble about something, it'd be that!

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By *adgodCouple
over a year ago

Greensburg


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

Dispute all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage

Dispite* (stupid fat fingers)"

One more try? Lol. Teasingly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OK then, here goes. Inspired by a brilliant 're_iew of the year' rant from JustJodie posted earlier, I'm going to chuck my own little hand grenade into this fetid little pond and see what stirs.

Many will go 'OMG - he's just committed swinging suicide' but ladies, some things need to be said and some things have a real grain of truth in them and maybe you ought to listen and learn something.

I am aware that this is a sex site and that swinging is dominated by couples and completely controlled by women but something needs to be said about the utterly ridiculous (and some might say, downright hypocritical) expectations of a lot of the ladies on here.

It concerns the reasons why many of you end up feeling compelled to put notes at the end of your profiles complaining about the 'abuse' you sometimes receive from some people. This is usually about messages you don't bother to answer etc. I notice many of you say things like 'if I don't, I'm not being rude/not up my own arse' then try to explain it with 'I just don't fancy you etc,' but are clearly at a loss to understand why it might happen at all.

I'm going to say something that will shock many of you - You do ask for it!

Yes, I did really just say that - let me tell you why.

We're all supposed to be mature, experienced adults here, who know what the real world of sex is all about. If so, why are so many ladies on here downright delusional!

I makes me laugh to see how many ladies 'of a certain age' feel able (and justified) to state that their desired playmate must be young, fit, virile, handsome, have a muscled, athletic body, be hung like a donkey, have more cum in his balls that a damn shire horse and be able to pump all night like a nuclear powered piston engine on steroids. Oh, and as well as that, he must also be clean, disease free, hugely experienced, well groomed, intelligent, respectful of your 'boundaries' (i.e. willing to let you have it all your way, NOT that anyone might say you might be just a tad on the selfish side when you do bother to meet)and have a good sense of humour, a tongue like a Komodo dragon and, of course be able to breathe through his damn ears!

I wouldn't mind but let's be honest, Most of us on here are not exactly spring chickens and although we gain sexual experience with age the mileage also starts to show. And to be honest, while age can look good on some men, it rarely does any favours for women.

What makes me smile is that for many of the ladies that post such demands, their body shots, for they rarely show their faces, show clearly that the supermodels amongst them are rarer still.

For many, if you were feeling kind, the word 'tired' might spring to mind. If you were feeling unkind, a whole host of adjectives troop across the horizon!

So lets have a reality check and get real, ladies. it will save hassle in the long run and probably get you more fun as well.

If such men existed they wouldn't need to be on here bothering, they could wander down to the local cattle market disco and have a whole bevy of hot, young, teenage totty lined up for a shag from here to Timbuctoo.

Likewise, if you were actually good looking enough to justify such demands you would, according to your level of intelligence, contacts or luck, either be:-

a) Gracing the cover of Vogue and dating top sportsmen, movie and rock stars

b) Living in the Playboy mansion, on page 3 or working in the 'adult' industry, and dating footballers.

C) Working in a lapdance bar, escort agency, webcam house or brothel and probably have a pimp!

But one thing you sure as f*&@ wouldn't be doing is wasting your time or assets on here!

Now I am the first to admit that I am myself on the wrong side of middle age, no model and never have been. I am an ordinary looking, fairly normal guy - but at least I know that. I ask only for a reasonable decent looking lady to be considerate enough to bother to find out what I'm like before dismissing me.

And ladies, that word is the crux of the matter. Too many here think that when a guy takes the time and trouble to message you, the fact that you might 'not fancy him' gives you the god-given right to hit 'delete' or block without even bothering with a two word reply.

Yes, girls, it DOES come across as arrogant, rude, inconsiderate and belittling. Men can handle being told you're not interested - they do not appreciate being treated as though they're shit off your shoes because you 'don't fancy them' when they've taken the trouble to write to you - even if it's just a few lines.

Dare I say that , no, a bit of manners would not cost you anything. That a simple 'no thanks' would be far better received than a contemptuous delete. I will go further. perhaps a bit more, a 'no thanks - but thanks for asking,' might be in order as, heaven forbid for suggesting it, but you might actually have grounds for being at least grateful for the fact that they're interested enough to bother!

I myself do not send abusive 'hurt' replies - I'm realistic enough to know they don't achieve anything - but I CAN understand why some men send them.

Which is why I feel compelled to write this and explain it to the many women on here who obviously don't get it.

Try seeing it from the other side and you might find you get a lot less grief from many quarters - and probably end up with more friends and better experiences.

For the truth is, as most should be experienced enough to know by now - looks are nice but no guarantee or guide to either personality or performance (which is equally true of both sexes!)

So girls, stop behaving as if you're still dancing round your handbags with your mates at the local cattle market, imagining you're the queen of dance and sex and acting as if you're so special a man's got to have the face of George Clooney, the body of Schwarzenegger and the cock of John Holmes to justify you even speaking to him.

So for the new year let's have a quiet site revolution - a sense of realism, consideration, good manners and even gratitude - and I suspect we'll all get on better as a community and have a better social AND sex life.

(and to all the guys who are probably reading this and cheering - that includes YOU lot as well as a lot of you also ask for the way you're treated. It's not just the ladies who need to show some respect, for reasons I won't bother going into here. I just got sick of the women moaning about how 'hard done by' they are by 'rude' men.)

Oh yes, almost forgot - merry Christmas and a happy, considerate, 2014.

"

The post of the year. And I think you were being kind!

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By *ordsandstuffMan
over a year ago

Highbury

Doesn't bear thinking about how it would be if the male/female ratios were reversed. Those in glass houses....

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By *ingjayMan
over a year ago

exeter

Ah he should do what I did give up looking and get pof pleeeenty of ass to be tapping on there!! And easier than the women on here if you looking for a F**k, this sites good for the forums, but ok not the man he described either. He does ring true with some if you had his cave man brain 'its a swinging site everyone's up for it with anyone', but it ain't and they ain't, so that side is shit down for me, I just here for the good people on the forums

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley


"popcorn anyone??

Popcorn isn't necessary. He's made his _iews clear and I read it all the way to end.

"

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Doesn't bear thinking about how it would be if the male/female ratios were reversed. Those in glass houses...."

There are sites where the ratios are reversed and the men willing to play the game of pretending they are looking for a relationship get plenty of sex meets on there. Instead of meeting for a social they go on a date and then when things feel comfortable it moves to sex.

If the ratios changed on Fab it would make very little difference to me - I would still be a fussy bint.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can people stop quoting the entire rant; my thumb is hanging off from continuously scrolling!!!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Can people stop quoting the entire rant; my thumb is hanging off from continuously scrolling!!! "

It is annoying but it's also annoying trying to cut the post down when you're on the phone.

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

priceless !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/12/13 21:23:30]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a précis of that would be 'man pissed off that ugly, fat old women can demand sex with virile fit young chaps'.

...and get it!

Mmmm I've had some "

I think there's quite a few of us that have

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

if anyone be it male ,female or couples what to have strict criteria on who interests them then why not? Not every one wants to shag every random who messages them. Let alone be greatfuL that someones sent a "I wanna smash your back doors in " type introduction If i wanted to meet Eric Northman ,local the 3rd Friday of each month then that is purley my choice alone lol.Its not affecting others enjoyment of the site is it . If a profile wasn't working for for the person/couple then im very sure theyd then change it .

As for the " you ask for abuse" ..what piffle ! There is NO excuse for being abusive . If a persons reply has to resort to abuse then it says far more about that person then the one whos mearly knocked them back lol !

Bottom line people will use their profile as they see fit,They will choose to meet as they see fit and vet their meets as they see fit . May not be way way you do it but doesn't mean its wrong .All about freedom of choice as has been said .You also have the choice to ingnor the old munters and their demands (such as guy not being married ) and mail those who do interest you . lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hope they do this in a spoken version. Read out aloud by the wonderful Stephen Fry I bet it would sound soothing.

"

Or Morgan Freemans voice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's the deal - 99% of swingers are couples.

Single guys are pretty much surplus to requirements. Very few couples are looking for them, and the few single girls that are on here are normally looking for couples or other women.

That leaves the tiny tiny proportion of couples and singles that might - if they want - hook up with a single male.

Here's the killer - no matter what they look like, no matter how old they are, and no matter how confident they are, women and couples can choose whoever they like. It has nothing to do with anyone else.

The fact is most men will sleep with anyone, so women CAN afford to be choosy.

I am part of a couple, if we split I can tell you this, no way would I ever even think of continuing on this path. Id cut and run. More chance of finding a shag on a proper dating site.

Look at clubs. Single guys are very rarely anything more than walking dildos. I'm not being a dick, its just the facts. "

99% ?? Utter bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you.

Nah he does...that's a pretty brave thing to say...we'll get guys playing the "all women are beautiful card" now trying to score brownie points..but its true...good on ya OP for being honest...still doesn't change anything...its a womens world here...but its still fun."

I agree, it's only a woman's world in here though because sycophantic , weak , desperate men let them. Don't lower you standards , don't kiss ass , don't change yourself, and if all that fails have a wank, got to be better than chasing some fat bird on here

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By *ayandess1Couple
over a year ago

bridgwater

Not in my observations - yes I exaggerated but its not all bollocks. I still stand by the jist of what I said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got to wonder why he he is messaging these women, and not getting replies obviously, if he thinks they are so past their prime and ugly , cos he obviously must be doing this if he's ranting about it

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"To the OP you just come across as a male with a big chip on your shoulder.

As for reading your rant and cheering ? slightly deluded of you to think that most of us males,share your mindset.

I think your rant is a pile of shite but all the best to you.

Nah he does...that's a pretty brave thing to say...we'll get guys playing the "all women are beautiful card" now trying to score brownie points..but its true...good on ya OP for being honest...still doesn't change anything...its a womens world here...but its still fun.

I agree, it's only a woman's world in here though because sycophantic , weak , desperate men let them. Don't lower you standards , don't kiss ass , don't change yourself, and if all that fails have a wank, got to be better than chasing some fat bird on here "

We don't run very fast.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some the post I agree with, in regards to lists of demands, I'm here to find friends to have sex with, and the odd kinky person to indulge in some fetish fun because it's hard finding that in normal life.

I don't want to be someones checklist sex toy. But I just don't message those people which works for me.

I think people should be more friendly :p

But from the otherside I get those messages from men which are simply "hey hot pics", "looking fit", "wanna fuck"?

and tbh I don't want to waste time to replying to that, what the fuck do they expect? When a blank shillohettie messages you one line, an their profile is just "hot guy looking for fun" what are you meant to reply and why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with 95%. Admire your balls. (from a straight guy)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Doesn't bear thinking about how it would be if the male/female ratios were reversed. Those in glass houses...."

Even if the roles were reversed I wouldn't fuck someone I wasn't attracted to...I don't enjoy sex without attraction so would be pretty pointless.

OP...I may be fat & ugly and have a fair few likes/dislikes but I think I do ok on here, both with my 'regular' meets and new ones, must be doing something right as I still get messages and have been meeting a couple of guys for some time now. As for the social aspect, I'm still in touch with a few guys who have left the scene to start relationships too...usually just the odd text to check in but to me that still counts.

However, because I am fat & ugly when I did actually take the time to reply with a 'thanks but no thanks' I have had a fair bit of abuse...admittedly not every guy dished out abuse but it was enough to dent my confidence and make me consider leaving at one point. So now I don't send a 'no thanks' message, and the ones that would have sent abuse rarely bother to seek me back out to send it as they weren't all that interested in the first place...they were just looking for an available hole. Yes that does mean that I am ignoring some of the nice guys that wouldn't give abuse, but chances are these men have read my profile and understand my reasoning for not replying, simply taking the non-reply as a no thanks...their experiences of the site are probably significantly better than yours as they aren't expecting to hear knickers falling every time they hit the send button.

As for the whole pic thing, if I make initial contact I will send a message, and I don't expect to get a reply! If I do get one then a face pic is appreciated as I don't want to waste someone's time by spending time chatting to find that I have no attraction to them...just as I don't want to waste their time if they don't find me attractive.

You're rant is nothing new, it's just an extended version. As an adult you should know things aren't going to be handed to you on a plate just because you ask for them...unless of course you're willing to pay in which case I suggest you find a different type of site. I'm sure you'll find more 'willing' women who are up to your high standards there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To goldicocks, can't be arsed editing quite on phone.

You say you get abuse after you turn guys down about your weight etc. I don't get that why the hell are they messaging someone they think is ugly for sex o.O

Actually aim that at the guys who do this as obviously you're not going to know the answer lol.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Some the post I agree with, in regards to lists of demands, I'm here to find friends to have sex with, and the odd kinky person to indulge in some fetish fun because it's hard finding that in normal life.

I don't want to be someones checklist sex toy. But I just don't message those people which works for me.

I think people should be more friendly :p

But from the otherside I get those messages from men which are simply "hey hot pics", "looking fit", "wanna fuck"?

and tbh I don't want to waste time to replying to that, what the fuck do they expect? When a blank shillohettie messages you one line, an their profile is just "hot guy looking for fun" what are you meant to reply and why?"

So men get these messages from men too? As your last paragraph says, what are you meant to reply and why? No effort in = no output and definitely no outcome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To goldicocks, can't be arsed editing quite on phone.

You say you get abuse after you turn guys down about your weight etc. I don't get that why the hell are they messaging someone they think is ugly for sex o.O

Actually aim that at the guys who do this as obviously you're not going to know the answer lol.

"

Maybe it's because they don't think the lady is fat and ugly but either have had so many knockbacks their ego / confidence is shattered and they take it out on the first or last lady they message. Or maybe they think us so called fat / ugly girls should be grateful that we get any kind of sex

Op I do not in way think I can get who I want and I'm very happy with who I have met. As for the fit young men I don't demand it but I'm not going to knock it!!

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By *errynjuneCouple
over a year ago

Barnsley

Just thought, perhaps Victor Meldrew reading it, with feeling of course. xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half....

Dispute all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage "

Ooh, a smashing pumpkins fan

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/12/13 22:21:33]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah _icketysplits we get them too, funnily usually from straight.guys.

I usually either just delete or occasionally respond about their inadequate cock size

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To goldicocks, can't be arsed editing quite on phone.

You say you get abuse after you turn guys down about your weight etc. I don't get that why the hell are they messaging someone they think is ugly for sex o.O

Actually aim that at the guys who do this as obviously you're not going to know the answer lol.

"

There are unfortunately a handful of guys on here that do have the 'any holes a goal' mentality, or will shag anyone to get that first meet verification which they think will then get them access to the women that are more their 'type', so they send messages to every female profile in a 20 mile radius in order to get that first score on the door. For them to be knocked back by someone who should clearly be desperate for any attention at all is a knock to the ego so they then resort to school-yard name calling. I don't tar all guys with the same brush, but the problem is you can't always tell from a profile which ones are going to send the abuse...the last one to tell me he'd have wanted me to lose a few pounds first anyway actually had a really nice and friendly profile. That's when I decided to just delete gping forward so that they'd have to put effort in to send abuse rather than just hit reply. I now rarely if ever get abuse, whereas when I did the courteous reply I could get it 4/5 times a week at least

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

The only part of that I can get on board with is the 'non-reply' bit.

I feel compelled by some sense of god-knows-what to reply to anybody who sends me a message about anything (unless it is actual drivel and I don't understand it). Its polite, damnit.

However, I am not a 'single laydee' and I possibly dont recieve the same volume of mail....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah _icketysplits we get them too, funnily usually from straight.guys.

I usually either just delete or occasionally respond about their inadequate cock size "

You bad boy, must remember that if I turn my filters off again lol

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound


"Yeah _icketysplits we get them too, funnily usually from straight.guys.

I usually either just delete or occasionally respond about their inadequate cock size "

Where are the threads about men being rude and inconsiderate and up themselves for just deleting the messages then? Why is this sort of rant thread always directed against women? Could it be that these threads really just reveal the thinly disguised misogynists for what they really are?

I must start a thread about all the men with demanding profiles and even more demanding messages thinking they are god's gift to womankind. I won't because it really doesn't bother me if men think I am not for them. I just find it funny when I get sent a picture of a tiny flaccid cock hanging below a beer belly on a man who looks closer to 60 than the 49 he claims on his profile. It usually comes with a message telling me they are very well endowed, athletic and young and that they are free right now to meet me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can someone sum that up into one paragraph for me please i dozed off after the first half.... "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow,

Well I'm a young, single, slim female and do consider myself attractive.

On this site because yes I could go down the cattle market and get a man but actually I'm looking for something just a little bit different.

I'm afraid as the women out number the men on here regardless of what we look like we are lucky enough to have the choice of who to play with.

In my first week of joining I got literally 100s of messages. I couldn't reply to them all however if I did reply back with a no thanks, I'd get a tirade if abuse back.

Should I tolerate that? No! I wouldn't put up with it in a bar and I most certainly won't put up with it here.

I will be the first to admit that yes I'm shallow, I do judge purely on looks in the first instance, if I'm not attracted to the person in the photo then there will be no chance of a meet, I don't care how funny or nice you are it's just not happening.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"The odd valid point amongst all this, particularly concerning "tired" individuals with less than reasonable expectations or downright arrogance and rudery, but the question that is left foremost in my mind is: who is John Holmes?

"

Porn star that died of aids back in the 80's....there was a film made about him called dirk diggler

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Build a bridge. ..get over it!...

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod

over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

WoW..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we did the photo exchange thread, I discovered some gorgeous looking ladies, so for all those guys who want to put us girls down, go fly a kite!

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

That worked,,

after reading that lot, I m now really tired,,

Night all,,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Took me two reads (bloody hard work) "

you managed 2 god couldn't get through it once

nice summary

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