FabSwingers.com forum: Fine Line

By *istress-Mazikeen OP Woman
over a year ago

bolton

Is there a fine line between, having a friend with benefits and being in a full relationship.

How do you draw the line.

For me the freind with benefits is the odd text during the day, and setting the date to meet.

What would you be like if your freind with benfit / f/buddy was texting you lots, and phoning, and saying they were missing you? And not wanting to meet others, and if you say your meeting others you get looks that could kill.

Would you cool it or just carry on, I know what I would do in my mind, but just asking peeps opinions.

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By *aughty_kittyWoman
over a year ago

finger licking good

i like my meets like i like my shampoo ... wash and go.

i like my lovers like i like mc donalds, eat it every other day, more then that i go off it and move to KFC

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a fine line between, having a friend with benefits and being in a full relationship.

How do you draw the line.

For me the freind with benefits is the odd text during the day, and setting the date to meet.

Would you cool it or just carry on, I know what I would do in my mind, but just asking peeps opinions.

In the past, with non committal, sexual relationship scenarios, I have put it to an end as soon as I see the signs that they want more than I can offer at that time, I don't think it's fair to carry on having non committal sexual liaisons if they start to have other ideas.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

Nowt wrong with that, I have and I'm sure everyone has many questions on one topic.

It's better than moaning thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

Nowt wrong with that, I have and I'm sure everyone has many questions on one topic.

It's better than moaning thread.

Oh I agree...but one under the other?!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

Nowt wrong with that, I have and I'm sure everyone has many questions on one topic.

It's better than moaning thread.

Oh I agree...but one under the other?!!"

oh don't start me off, one under the other, I'm a little horny today and Ms Rooney ain't here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a fine line between, having a friend with benefits and being in a full relationship.

How do you draw the line.

For me the freind with benefits is the odd text during the day, and setting the date to meet.

Would you cool it or just carry on, I know what I would do in my mind, but just asking peeps opinions.

I agree with you Friends with benefits are great untill they start contacting you all the time, if you have explained that you want nothing more and they continue then it's time to move on in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

Nowt wrong with that, I have and I'm sure everyone has many questions on one topic.

It's better than moaning thread.

Oh I agree...but one under the other?!!

oh don't start me off, one under the other, I'm a little horny today and Ms Rooney ain't here.

Wayne you have a one tracked mind...

Go and find something useful to do and stop perving...lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

Nowt wrong with that, I have and I'm sure everyone has many questions on one topic.

It's better than moaning thread.

Oh I agree...but one under the other?!!

oh don't start me off, one under the other, I'm a little horny today and Ms Rooney ain't here.

Wayne you have a one tracked mind...

Go and find something useful to do and stop perving...lol"

lol, only today, I have things I need to do shortly, so on here now for a little while.

In the forums too, not perving at profiles, lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a fine line between, having a friend with benefits and being in a full relationship.

How do you draw the line.

For me the freind with benefits is the odd text during the day, and setting the date to meet.

Would you cool it or just carry on, I know what I would do in my mind, but just asking peeps opinions.

I always set boundaries - if they cross it just ignore and move on immediately.

One of my previous playmates would make snide remarks when I had other meets, and knowing I never turn my phone of would text continually when he knew I was playing

What I've found is some people say they are looking for a nsa, but in reality they're looking for a relationship with someone who practices more than the missionary position and broad minded!

I make it clear now from the off that they are one of a hansful of playmates. Thankfully those I play with now understand that we are all just satisfying a natural need and it won't end at the altar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...They are no longer friends with benefits, but friends with expectations...

It will only get worse...

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By *istress-Mazikeen OP Woman
over a year ago

bolton

"Variations on a theme from your other topic?!!

I know but just something that when you get other peoples opinions, can help you make a good decision, and not an angry rushed one when you get pissed off.

I would do what most of you have said, say stop texting, cool it and see how it goes, if they dont then it would be sorry bye, you cant accept that I am playing with others.

Cheers for the info.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its a hard one that no pun intended!!

me personally being relationship phobic for many reasons prefer to have a buddie or whatever you want to call it but in a non commital basis.

currently the buddy i have we are in contact a lot via texts msn etc but that suits us its not a relationship as such but not exclusive either but we have the utmost respect and understanding of what we want from each other.

in the future it may change i dont know? i know im confusing lol!!

sometimes good communication about what each other wants and needs and expects is crucial and i mean sit down cards on the table and get it out dont have an ulterior motive and be honest and if its not what the 2 of you want then its time to move on and seek what you want elsewhere. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats the problem Mznwty people arent honest about what they want.

I dont think it matters what you need to be honest about in life, whether its a mate who needs to hear that yes that skirt does make her arse look the size of a small country, or if its someone who needs to be told to back off.

I think often people find their special someone when they least expect to.

I found hubby when I wasnt looking so I know it happens to some.

BUT if you feel something for someone and they feel nothing in return, all your going to do is get hurt. I also think you cannot make someone feel something they dont, so if you expect to make them fall for you then you are in for a huge upset further down the line, no matter how diplomatic they other person is.

My advice would be tell the truth if you feel something for someone (other than sexual attaction that is lol) tell them and that gives them the opertunity to say if they feel the same, and if they dont you can walk away and find someone who does feel the same as you.

I know in reality its not as simple as that but it could be if we were all honest and upfront about what we want in life.

Shona

x x x

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Im afraid it would be a goodbye from me, it should be fun not hassle

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

For me personally there isn't a thin line between a fuck buddy (I refuse to call them fwb's) and a relationship.... there is a fecking great big thick line.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I sometimes think some of these namby-pamby terms people use don’t help.

Fuck buddy… the sex comes first in the term… fuck first, buddy second… fuck buddy. If you don’t like the word ‘fuck’, try playmate. Play (sex - first) mate (friend/buddie - second).

The term ‘friend with benefits’ to me generally implies if you have sex it’s a bonus… the friendship preceding the sex in order of priority… way too namby-pamby for my liking.

Ok it’s all a bit NLP, but it does give some people the wrong idea about your level of connection.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look at it this way buying one Christmas

prezzie or birthday prezzie is bad enough lol

also having one woman bend ya ear is enough

so if they gets heavy run for them there hills lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sometimes think some of these namby-pamby terms people use don’t help.

Fuck buddy… the sex comes first in the term… fuck first, buddy second… fuck buddy. If you don’t like the word ‘fuck’, try playmate. Play (sex - first) mate (friend/buddie - second).

The term ‘friend with benefits’ to me generally implies if you have sex it’s a bonus… the friendship preceding the sex in order of priority… way too namby-pamby for my liking.

Ok it’s all a bit NLP, but it does give some people the wrong idea about your level of connection.

Friend with benefits = Unemployed friend doesn't it?.

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

"...They are no longer friends with benefits, but friends with expectations...

It will only get worse...

"
i know what your saying.we have been married over 25 years.im beginning to get the feeling,shes getting to close,and expecting more than i am willing to give.i dont know what to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well clearly you inspire great devotion Rock Chick! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...They are no longer friends with benefits, but friends with expectations...

It will only get worse...

i know what your saying.we have been married over 25 years.im beginning to get the feeling,shes getting to close,and expecting more than i am willing to give.i dont know what to do.

bloody terrible that!!!

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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

Not sure what you`d call one of my swinging friendships!

A lady I know "took me under her wing" when I first came onto the scene. The current position is that I visit her and her non-playing husband who has similar interests to me (outside of sex) and as friends we all get along well. In return for providing her transport, paying for a room and entry into a club, I get to accompany her round the club and play with her, either in the club or in the room afterwards. She does have her other man friends who she meets at the club and anyone else who takes her fancy. I suppose I`m more her minder at the club more than anything. I too am free to play with anyone who takes my fancy in the club when we`re there and there`s all of the perving chances for me too which suits me fine!

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By *ebzStarWoman
over a year ago

Notting

Terrible but v funny!!!!

Not all people are honest unfortunately - and more so not when they bloody well should be.

In these sort of contexts honesty is a MUST MUST MUST - and if everyone is open about what they do and dont want on BOTH sides 0 then there should be no misunderstandings.

Just wish everyone was more honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...They are no longer friends with benefits, but friends with expectations...

It will only get worse...

i know what your saying.we have been married over 25 years.im beginning to get the feeling,shes getting to close,and expecting more than i am willing to give.i dont know what to do.

Play it cool and see how it goes, another 25 years and the queen is inclined to congratulate you on your coolness...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Different people have different expectations, and it's about being honest with each other and if one person can't accept the others boundaries or respect them then one has to walk away.

I have some guys that are in contact a lot / fair amount / not a lot........... each to their own - as long as it's clear from out the outset it shouldn't be a problem

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