FabSwingers.com forum: Relate

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Relate - We went years ago, best thing we ever did, just wondered if anyone else had been and what you gained from it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wish my ex was mature enough to communicate with me and realise we had problems deep enough to go t oa relationship counciller, instead of being wrapped up with her own things and not seeing i was broken and needed help.

ah well, onwards and upwards.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Surprised that no one else has ever been.

Just to re iterate, Relate not only made our marriage better, but made us much stronger as people and therefore as a couple.

Would recommend it and would reply to those who may need advice on our experiences.

As said before, we went many years ago and the same stuff we learnt from it applies.

In case anyone wonders - they are not the "God Squad"!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The main thing about going, was to be open minded, probably why I am surprised nobody else has been.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He cheated on me .... Nothing would have made that better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He cheated on me .... Nothing would have made that better"

see thats where ours ended.

problem was, we got together when she was quite young so hadnt developed the interpersonal skills that are required to make a relationship work.

she had a very selfish attitude to live, never asking how my day was and always turning conversations around so they were about her, so she didnt notice i was struggling with depression.

she just took it that i didnt fancy her anymore so found it elsewhere.

we are fine with each other now, and she realises she could have done better.

so its all good, but yes, something like Relate would have helped before it got to that stage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would hope that if we had relationship troubles we would be grown up enough to talk to each other open and honestly to each other without the need to ask a stranger to help!

Understand that relate would and does work for others, so not dissing it

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"The main thing about going, was to be open minded, probably why I am surprised nobody else has been."

Lots of people might have been but just done want to talk about it to other people

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I get all that is said.

If either of us were to have cheated that would have been the end of us too!!

We also understand most would keep quiet about it, but just wanted to shout it out in case it helped people make the choice to try it.

In case any were wondering relate came years before we embarked on Gangbangs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For any kind of counseling though all parties involved have to be willing to commit to it and want to do it otherwise it will not work

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I suggested going to relate when my marriage ended suddenly without any warning to me. My husband at the time told me there was no point in going as he wanted a divorce. He wasn't able to be honest with me for the reasons for the end and probably with himself so the thought of him having to discuss it out loud was not something he was going to do. He had made his decision and was final. What me or the kids needed was irrelevant to him. Strangely enough he is still interested in who I date or what sort of clubs I attend.

Cake and eat it??? No way ex!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Relate will see one partner without the other too. I tsometimes helps people move on or accept that a relationship is going nowhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't afford them.

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By *eMontresMan
over a year ago

Halesowen

I guess it depends on the counselor. Went a few times with my ex, but it was a total waste of money and time. Counselor was a semi literate moron with maybe an nvq in clipboard management

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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

my relationship hit a bad spell a few years ago but we spoke to each other about it communication is the key

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By *irtyAndCh33kyCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

I went to relate with my ex husband....he punched me in the face after the session so we never went back. Some relationships aren't meant to be saved!

The best thing I ever did was leave him and now I'm with Mr Ch33ky I know what a loving, secure and respectful relationship is like

Mrs Dirty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For any kind of counseling though all parties involved have to be willing to commit to it and want to do it otherwise it will not work"

If one of you isnt listening, or only there to be told they are right and the other is wrong... Save yourselves the time and effort....

There are many success stories though...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I went to relate with my ex husband....he punched me in the face after the session so we never went back. Some relationships aren't meant to be saved!

The best thing I ever did was leave him and now I'm with Mr Ch33ky I know what a loving, secure and respectful relationship is like

Mrs Dirty "

you're right some relationships aren't worth saving and Relate will never advise people to stay together if parting is better or indeed safer for one or both of them

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By *rsSuckWoman
over a year ago

Hemel Hempstead

Relate told us we are wasting our money to come to them, as my hubbie is unwilling to change.

I wish it was as easy as talking. I talk and my hubbie ignores me.

If I had the money I would leave. I am stuck with a man that loves his computer more than me.

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By *andomness23Man
over a year ago

Close..

"I suggested going to relate when my marriage ended suddenly without any warning to me. My husband at the time told me there was no point in going as he wanted a divorce. He wasn't able to be honest with me for the reasons for the end and probably with himself so the thought of him having to discuss it out loud was not something he was going to do. He had made his decision and was final. What me or the kids needed was irrelevant to him. Strangely enough he is still interested in who I date or what sort of clubs I attend.

Cake and eat it??? No way ex!

"
well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have our own perceptions of things and I really do admire people who have got through bad times ..

But for others some of those bad times are unforgivable even with help

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By *ussyGalore and Mr OCouple
over a year ago

A House

"Relate told us we are wasting our money to come to them, as my hubbie is unwilling to change.

I wish it was as easy as talking. I talk and my hubbie ignores me.

If I had the money I would leave. I am stuck with a man that loves his computer more than me.

(((((((((((hugs)))))))))))

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