FabSwingers.com forum: OMG I need help

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

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By *he one in the middleMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

What is it you need help with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it your profile ?

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

"Is it your profile ?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you toppled over in your red high heels?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will help u

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By *renchbambi xWoman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

My wings are too small...sory hunnie. I'll lend you my umbrella if you want x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is the title slightly short, shouldnt it end with AGAIN.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bingo wings?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Batwings?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is it your profile ?"

no my profile is fine

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Batwings?"

bugger are they showing in my pics !!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

is the title slightly short, shouldnt it end with AGAIN."

I have never asked for this kinda help

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"bingo wings?

shhhhhhhhhhhhh no one noticed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My wings are too small...sory hunnie. I'll lend you my umbrella if you want x"

that would be useful for poking ... good idea

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have you toppled over in your red high heels?"

nope they currently arent on my feet - they are resting in their box lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is the title slightly short, shouldnt it end with AGAIN.

I have never asked for this kinda help

Maybe not but how long is yer list of other needs?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

What is it you need help with "

something is haunting me

or will be lol

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By *he one in the middleMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

is the title slightly short, shouldnt it end with AGAIN.

I have never asked for this kinda help

"
so what help do you need

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

is the title slightly short, shouldnt it end with AGAIN.

I have never asked for this kinda help

Maybe not but how long is yer list of other needs? "

ohhhh that gets fulfilled

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have ur feet swelled up and u cant get the shoes off now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have u tied a double knot too tightly in your corset can't get it untied n struggling to breathe

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I will help u"

thank u are u big n brave cos I need to stand behind you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have u tied a double knot too tightly in your corset can't get it untied n struggling to breathe

nope havent been trapped in that since the last time lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're about to be haunted? Is this a game of charades?

YOU'RE OPENING YOUR NEW GAS BILL!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"have ur feet swelled up and u cant get the shoes off now?"

nope ....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You're about to be haunted? Is this a game of charades?

YOU'RE OPENING YOUR NEW GAS BILL!!!"

no thats DD so no problem

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have u lost a cucumber?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?"

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"have u lost a cucumber?"

have u found one then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I'm big shouldered and chested... i better not need to deflect bullets though...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"have u lost a cucumber?

have u found one then?

just a pickled one...will that be a problem?

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By *taffsfella1Man
over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme

You have a spider in your house?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you got your head stuck in some railings in ya local cemetery?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"have u lost a cucumber?

have u found one then?

just a pickled one...will that be a problem?"

its not mine

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You have a spider in your house? "

I like spiders

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have you got your head stuck in some railings in ya local cemetery?

pmsl ... omg if I had I can imagine the queue of people wanting to get revenge for some of the things I have done lol and NO I havent been THAT stoopid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You ordered a gimp and it went feral?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I'm big shouldered and chested... i better not need to deflect bullets though..."

there is nothing wrong with my bullet, it clearly has intelligence cos its heard there is an economy drive going on - hence only two batteries lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You ordered a gimp and it went feral?"

oooooooooooo fuck nooooooooooooo thats not on my radar .... they freak me

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By *ort123Man
over a year ago

Tredegar

Spider????? Urgh!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I'm big shouldered and chested... i better not need to deflect bullets though...

there is nothing wrong with my bullet, it clearly has intelligence cos its heard there is an economy drive going on - hence only two batteries lol

Two batteres for a bullet?

Jeezus pleezus!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I am big, tall, wide but not strong lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I'm big shouldered and chested... i better not need to deflect bullets though...

there is nothing wrong with my bullet, it clearly has intelligence cos its heard there is an economy drive going on - hence only two batteries lol

Two batteres for a bullet?

Jeezus pleezus!"

did u not see my thread the other day about how the fuck is it working when ... it should have three batteries and is working with two only in it ... lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I am big, tall, wide but not strong lol "

wuss or brave?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I'm big shouldered and chested... i better not need to deflect bullets though...

there is nothing wrong with my bullet, it clearly has intelligence cos its heard there is an economy drive going on - hence only two batteries lol

Two batteres for a bullet?

Jeezus pleezus!

did u not see my thread the other day about how the fuck is it working when ... it should have three batteries and is working with two only in it ... lol

Hahaha mystery solved. The mysterious case of the possessed bullet vibe. Hey my ex's rabbit melted!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No its not about the bullet

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By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

Does it have anything to do with marmalade?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I am big, tall, wide but not strong lol

wuss or brave?

A wuss

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

How may I help?

I need to hide behind someone - someone big and strong and tall and wide .......... really wide

I am big, tall, wide but not strong lol

wuss or brave?

A wuss

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

OK the crisis might have averted or dispersed ... for the time being

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you about to be given a proper seeing to by someone dressed in a bed sheet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dont tell me u've shat urself...........

again!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Are you about to be given a proper seeing to by someone dressed in a bed sheet?"

noooooooooooooooooo lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"dont tell me u've shat urself...........

again!"

Paddy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you about to be given a proper seeing to by someone dressed in a bed sheet?

noooooooooooooooooo lol

I dont believe you (plus I'm out of ideas)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"dont tell me u've shat urself...........

again!

Paddy

oops, meant that private

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"dont tell me u've shat urself...........

again!

Paddy

oops, meant that private

bad bad man

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

Is it your electrics? Your avatar looks like you have been messing with them again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For crissakes ya NOT run out of milk for your hot cocoa n wanted someone nip shop for u but that's now averted cos ya suddenly started lactating is it?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is it your electrics? Your avatar looks like you have been messing with them again. "

Nope havent played with anything dangerous

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"For crissakes ya NOT run out of milk for your hot cocoa n wanted someone nip shop for u but that's now averted cos ya suddenly started lactating is it?

nope its ok its (well they are) sorted now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You were in the rain without an umbrella... like a wet lil kitty...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

anyway, back to your profile......

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"anyway, back to your profile......"

yeah my profile ................ ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You were in the rain without an umbrella... like a wet lil kitty..."

nah havent ventured out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spiders?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spiders?"

love em

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

earwig infested knickers?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"earwig infested knickers?"

Paddy ................. u made me snigger then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

yeah useful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"earwig infested knickers?

Paddy ................. u made me snigger then

the only insect i utterly detest lol..I knew u couldnt love them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

yeah useful

My cat just watches them and follows them around. Silly animal only chases moths lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"earwig infested knickers?

Paddy ................. u made me snigger then

the only insect i utterly detest lol..I knew u couldnt love them!"

was gonna ask is that an improvement or not on ants in ya pants ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

yeah useful

My cat just watches them and follows them around. Silly animal only chases moths lol

one of mine eats em

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

yeah useful

My cat just watches them and follows them around. Silly animal only chases moths lol

one of mine eats em

Eeeee! Pussy breath is bad enough

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spiders?

love em

Me too, cute furry little fly-catchers!

yeah useful

My cat just watches them and follows them around. Silly animal only chases moths lol

one of mine eats em

Eeeee! Pussy breath is bad enough

lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

you certainly do

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can someone please take me under their wing ......................... I need rescuing - urgently

you certainly do

thanks lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

read all of this - making me smile - still dunno what help is needed for tho

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By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

"read all of this - making me smile - still dunno what help is needed for tho"

Everything

(Didn't mean it)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"read all of this - making me smile - still dunno what help is needed for tho

Everything

(Didn't mean it)

yeah u did

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

the bit that really surprises me lots ......... is that no one has said I am beyond help!!!! lol

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

Do you need rescuing from the danger of trick or treaters on Thursday?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have ya got your head stuck between your legs trying to open them shoes, while in the middle of a meet , and now your ass is exposed to the elements, your meet got bored and fucked off, your feet are sinking in the mood and the storm is comming at you over the moors,, you need someone big to shelter under while you finish yourself off and get unstuck?????

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By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

"the bit that really surprises me lots ......... is that no one has said I am beyond help!!!! lol

Aww your not a lost cause .... just a little lost ..... sometimes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you need rescuing from the danger of trick or treaters on Thursday?

not yet !!! lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"the bit that really surprises me lots ......... is that no one has said I am beyond help!!!! lol

Aww your not a lost cause .... just a little lost ..... sometimes

am laughing now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"have ya got your head stuck between your legs trying to open them shoes, while in the middle of a meet , and now your ass is exposed to the elements, your meet got bored and fucked off, your feet are sinking in the mood and the storm is comming at you over the moors,, you need someone big to shelter under while you finish yourself off and get unstuck?????"

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

love the fact u wiggled out of answering the undoing shoes bit .... nooooooooooooo they wouldnt at all would they ............. *coughs and chokes *

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

love the fact u wiggled out of answering the undoing shoes bit .... nooooooooooooo they wouldnt at all would they ............. *coughs and chokes *

open ,, take off ,, remove ,,, surely your missing the point

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

love the fact u wiggled out of answering the undoing shoes bit .... nooooooooooooo they wouldnt at all would they ............. *coughs and chokes *

open ,, take off ,, remove ,,, surely your missing the point

explain the open bit??

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester

Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

love the fact u wiggled out of answering the undoing shoes bit .... nooooooooooooo they wouldnt at all would they ............. *coughs and chokes *

open ,, take off ,, remove ,,, surely your missing the point

explain the open bit??

ok i will,,, they look like they must have zips in the soles ,,, or painted on

happy now

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By *uicybum62Woman
over a year ago

leeds

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

"
did you do same has me reading and reading still dont if you find out can you let me no

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

u worry me ......... what pic are u looking at ... how do I open my shoes ... ????? and surely if I was in that precarious position someone would take advantage ..............

yes but people on fab wouldnt even consider taken advantge

love the fact u wiggled out of answering the undoing shoes bit .... nooooooooooooo they wouldnt at all would they ............. *coughs and chokes *

open ,, take off ,, remove ,,, surely your missing the point

explain the open bit??

ok i will,,, they look like they must have zips in the soles ,,, or painted on

happy now

vivid imagination lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

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By *uicybum62Woman
over a year ago

leeds

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

"
his it has long has the other 1

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

his it has long has the other 1

can I have this in English please

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By *uckyinlustMan
over a year ago

manchester

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

his it has long has the other 1

My patience has gone now .........head done in ........

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

his it has long has the other 1

My patience has gone now .........head done in ........

but I did say last nite it was sorted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

ya just ne a good shag from some irish farmer cock, and then sent home walkin in a new pair of wellies ,,, that el sort ya out!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

ya just ne a good shag from some irish farmer cock, and then sent home walkin in a new pair of wellies ,,, that el sort ya out!!

wellies ................. ooooooo are they PINK

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

ya just ne a good shag from some irish farmer cock, and then sent home walkin in a new pair of wellies ,,, that el sort ya out!!

wellies ................. ooooooo are they PINK

pink or brown ,, what ever ya like

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ffs we still don't know why you need help ............just feckin tell us will ya

that's resolved but I have another issue now ..........................

ya just ne a good shag from some irish farmer cock, and then sent home walkin in a new pair of wellies ,,, that el sort ya out!!

wellies ................. ooooooo are they PINK

pink or brown ,, what ever ya like

its show n tell time now - u show I'll tell ya whether I like em

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've really kept them all going this time !

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