FabSwingers.com forum: True Brit

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

After a couple of days and many many political threads I thought perhaps it's time for a change.

Then just like after general election time I thought "nah, same shit different day"

In one of the other threads I asked if anyone (particularly the rabid right amongst you) could give me some examples of what these supposed Great British values are? Because apparently they are being forgotten and trampled on by the workshy and filthy foreign types.

Answer came there none. So have another think and post here.

If anyone has any joke ones they'd like to share that'd be good too.

I can't possibly see anything going wrong with this thread. It's solid.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

You have to like Brit Pop, else you can't say you are a true Brit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lile British bacon so im a true brit xx

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

Being an American and one of the obvious problems as a filthy foreigner (tongue on cheek) plus having 2 sons born in this country I can only comment about what I see as an outsider. Having travelled a bit has been a great eye opening experience for me. I never knew how narrow minded patriotism can make a person till then. It's not bad to love ones community and there are pros and cons everywhere on the planet. I do love so very many things about this country and my own. I hope that I will teach my kids that being patriotic does not have to include hate or intolerance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You have to like Brit Pop, else you can't say you are a true Brit.

What? If that means liking 1Direction I'd rather be from bongobongo land!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dripping sarnies xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

suppose the most intrinsic 'british' values would be:

a sense of fair play

hard days work for a fair days pay

look after your own

dont shit on your doorstep

dislike everyone, but tolerate everyone lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Id agree with the last one!

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

Queuing- a true Brit automatically queues...the whinges about it.

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

One thing I noticed early on and that still baffles me is how Brits like to use insults as terms of endearment.. one fella calling another a cunt then hugging him. You Brits are very odd sometimes lol

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"I hope that I will teach my kids that being patriotic does not have to include hate or intolerance.

this..

and an ability to laugh at ourselves..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"One thing I noticed early on and that still baffles me is how Brits like to use insults as terms of endearment.. one fella calling another a cunt then hugging him. You Brits are very odd sometimes lol "

I think Aussies do that too. But they say stuff like "Hey there me old Dingos bollock". Or that's possibly stereotypical and casually rascist.

Ohhh there's one, casual rascism!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

erm, coming from america, surely you have come across all these things you find strange about the brits?

the gang sub culture calling each other by derogatory terms, as endearments?

the narrow minded patriotism of the americans is much larger than anything we could be accused of lol.

even listening to a guy talking about the government being shut down he said 'why cant we sort this out, i thought we were the greatest country on earth'

been a fair few generations passed since Brits thought that about themselves lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our ability to produce the greatest queues in the world

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

erm, coming from america, surely you have come across all these things you find strange about the brits?

the gang sub culture calling each other by derogatory terms, as endearments?

the narrow minded patriotism of the americans is much larger than anything we could be accused of lol.

even listening to a guy talking about the government being shut down he said 'why cant we sort this out, i thought we were the greatest country on earth'

been a fair few generations passed since Brits thought that about themselves lol"

I never claimed it was any better over there. I'm from Texas. .. THE most insular and backward bible bashing narrow minded American there are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

erm, coming from america, surely you have come across all these things you find strange about the brits?

the gang sub culture calling each other by derogatory terms, as endearments?

the narrow minded patriotism of the americans is much larger than anything we could be accused of lol.

even listening to a guy talking about the government being shut down he said 'why cant we sort this out, i thought we were the greatest country on earth'

been a fair few generations passed since Brits thought that about themselves lol

I never claimed it was any better over there. I'm from Texas. .. THE most insular and backward bible bashing narrow minded American there are"

would love to go to texas.

yaahaw lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Our ability to produce the greatest queues in the world

We do it properly here, and will kill anyone who violates the queing system.

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

"Our ability to produce the greatest queues in the world

We do it properly here, and will kill anyone who violates the queing system. "

Brits and Germans asked to queue... recipe for disaster

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Our ability to produce the greatest queues in the world

We do it properly here, and will kill anyone who violates the queing system.

Brits and Germans asked to queue... recipe for disaster

Shhh...don't mention the war....

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By *atasha_DavidCouple
over a year ago

Slough

Its a fine example of disguised macho culture because Brit men are so sexually repressed.

To use a term of endearment might get you mistaken for a (insert favourite euphemistic name for a gay man here), heaven forbid, so instead they use an insult. Only a true friend is allowed this privilege so the use of it is an instant sign to the pack of friendship, the grosser the insult the deeper the friendship.

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By *ustmaybeMan
over a year ago

Northwood

Tea, scones and fish n chips.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tea, scones and fish n chips."

That's not a british value. That's dinner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"suppose the most intrinsic 'british' values would be:

a sense of fair play

hard days work for a fair days pay

look after your own

dont shit on your doorstep

dislike everyone, but tolerate everyone lol"

If this is the case, we've lost our way!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you heard me speak? I think its all about the accent lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cup of tea and a proper bacon butty. Moaning about the weather, being polite to your face but complaining like crazy to anyone else

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Putting our TWO! fingers up as an insult is gradually disappearing from society due to Johnny Foreigner.

A sad sad day indeed.

So FU!

(òÓ,)_\,,/

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The values bit is difficult. For every value I can think of I can also think of other countries that would naturally hold those values. Traits, however, is what you are getting on this thread and are the things I can identify.

I don't know anywhere else where people can complain about foreign accents in call centres but will adjust that to accommodate even the harshest, most difficult to understand regional accent. Everyone is speaking English but the accents are different.

Entire conversations about the weather and the route taken to get there but never mention politics, religion and family.

You might chat at the bus stop but once on the bus, tube or train conversation should cease.

Bristling is censure enough, preferably with pursed lips but for heaven's sake don't send the meal back and just say it was lovely.

Stand outside and chat to the neighbours etc. for half an hour but don't invite them in as that's getting a bit too cosy. Plus, if you do invite them in a good neighbour will say no.

I love, love, love this country. I no longer holiday abroad as I would rather spend the money here and visit all the places I love and those I haven't been to yet. It's just that sometimes I feel a little sad that people focus on the what isn't working but don't do anything to fix it.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Putting our TWO! fingers up as an insult is gradually disappearing from society due to Johnny Foreigner.

A sad sad day indeed.

So FU!

(òÓ,)_\,,/"

Don't blame Johnny Foreigner when it's Cameron using just one finger as his new symbol for Tory Britain. Campaign and insist he uses the proper two fingered British salute.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The values bit is difficult. For every value I can think of I can also think of other countries that would naturally hold those values. Traits, however, is what you are getting on this thread and are the things I can identify.

Entire conversations about the weather and the route taken to get there but never mention politics, religion and family.

You might chat at the bus stop but once on the bus, tube or train conversation should cease.

Bristling is censure enough, preferably with pursed lips but for heaven's sake don't send the meal back and just say it was lovely.

Stand outside and chat to the neighbours etc. for half an hour but don't invite them in as that's getting a bit too cosy. Plus, if you do invite them in a good neighbour will say no.

i love the thing about the neighbours.

its me all over with both mine lol

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

"You have to like Brit Pop, else you can't say you are a true Brit.

What? If that means liking 1Direction I'd rather be from bongobongo land!

I always thought Bongobongo land was in the Inverness area

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Its near Howondaland!

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

Must:

* love fish and chips

* drink tea - WITH milk

* always have a kettle ready for boiling

* moan about the weather - no matter whether the weather is good, bad, indifferent

* know how to queue

* tut and murmur at all those foreign types who don't know how to queue

* drive on the left

* have a variety of umbrellas which are constantly left on public transport

* understand the concept of Sunday Dinner even if you don't observe the practice

* use sarcasm in place of compliments

* understand the minutae of the class system and where your place is in it

* complain/bitch about anyone you see as not in your class - which would be everyone else

* believe everything you read in a tabloid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Must:

* love fish and chips

* drink tea - WITH milk

* always have a kettle ready for boiling

* moan about the weather - no matter whether the weather is good, bad, indifferent

* know how to queue

* tut and murmur at all those foreign types who don't know how to queue

* drive on the left

* have a variety of umbrellas which are constantly left on public transport

* understand the concept of Sunday Dinner even if you don't observe the practice

* use sarcasm in place of compliments

* understand the minutae of the class system and where your place is in it

* complain/bitch about anyone you see as not in your class - which would be everyone else

* believe everything you read in a tabloid "

This is it, in a nutshell

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By *ust_for_laughsCouple
over a year ago

Hinckley

erm, coming from america, surely you have come across all these things you find strange about the brits?

the gang sub culture calling each other by derogatory terms, as endearments?

the narrow minded patriotism of the americans is much larger than anything we could be accused of lol.

even listening to a guy talking about the government being shut down he said 'why cant we sort this out, i thought we were the greatest country on earth'

been a fair few generations passed since Brits thought that about themselves lol

I never claimed it was any better over there. I'm from Texas. .. THE most insular and backward bible bashing narrow minded American there are"

I've got a friend from Ohio (he always emphasises the 'from', as he never wants to go back) who would fight you for the Biggest Backward State title!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Must:

* love fish and chips

* drink tea - WITH milk

* always have a kettle ready for boiling

* moan about the weather - no matter whether the weather is good, bad, indifferent

* know how to queue

* tut and murmur at all those foreign types who don't know how to queue

* drive on the left

* have a variety of umbrellas which are constantly left on public transport

* understand the concept of Sunday Dinner even if you don't observe the practice

* use sarcasm in place of compliments

* understand the minutae of the class system and where your place is in it

* complain/bitch about anyone you see as not in your class - which would be everyone else

* believe everything you read in a tabloid "

Is that on the Nationality test?

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"Must:

* love fish and chips

* drink tea - WITH milk

* always have a kettle ready for boiling

* moan about the weather - no matter whether the weather is good, bad, indifferent

* know how to queue

* tut and murmur at all those foreign types who don't know how to queue

* drive on the left

* have a variety of umbrellas which are constantly left on public transport

* understand the concept of Sunday Dinner even if you don't observe the practice

* use sarcasm in place of compliments

* understand the minutae of the class system and where your place is in it

* complain/bitch about anyone you see as not in your class - which would be everyone else

* believe everything you read in a tabloid

Is that on the Nationality test?"

Yup and if you pass you get 'TrueBrit' stamped on your arse in indelible ink.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Is that on the Nationality test?

Yup and if you pass you get 'TrueBrit' stamped on your arse in indelible ink.

I fail

I don't drink tea.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

Is that on the Nationality test?

Yup and if you pass you get 'TrueBrit' stamped on your arse in indelible ink.

I fail

I don't drink tea."

Oh dear - no arse stamp then!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Is that on the Nationality test?

Yup and if you pass you get 'TrueBrit' stamped on your arse in indelible ink.

I fail

I don't drink tea."

Get back where you came from!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Is that on the Nationality test?

Yup and if you pass you get 'TrueBrit' stamped on your arse in indelible ink.

I fail

I don't drink tea.

Get back where you came from!

But I can queue and tut and all the other stuff really well.

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

Tractors in lincolnshire no longer pull over to let the queue of traffic behind them pass.

my theory is that nearly all farmhands round here are now Polish and they dont know our etiquette

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By *rivate auditionsMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

"After a couple of days and many many political threads I thought perhaps it's time for a change.

Then just like after general election time I thought "nah, same shit different day"

Answer came there none. So have another think and post here.

If anyone has any joke ones they'd like to share that'd be good too.

I can't possibly see anything going wrong with this thread. It's solid."

oh!,so your one of forum the limp wristed lefties eh?.

nah!,am not gonna rise to bait sorry!.

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