FabSwingers.com forum: the l word

By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

have you ever said it and not really meant it? or had someone say it to you when you know they don't

why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL is that an I or an L?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i have got to a stage in a relationship where i couldn't say it anymore, needless to say it didn't last long

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

If you mean the Love word then I have only said it when I have meant it. I have had someone say it to me and then 18 months later tell me that when he said it he didn't mean it for me. He was thinking of someone with the same name as me who he loved at the time but couldn't be with and as he was with me tried to convince us both that he did love me.

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

One of the most over used words, when used correctly and sincerely: changes lives.

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

Sometimes I think people get the definition of lust and love completely wrong.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I say it when I mean it....words are often like promises and are only comfort to a fool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only ever meant it when I said it.

My most recent ex told me he never meant it and I know now he didn't - he just used me and went back to his ex. That hurt so much. I would've rather he never said it at all.

Hey ho. He has definitely downgraded

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By *ibbyhunterCouple
over a year ago

keighley

glad it's the love word, been going crazy here thinking what the i word could be.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"glad it's the love word, been going crazy here thinking what the i word could be.

you wasn't alone

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"I've only ever meant it when I said it.

My most recent ex told me he never meant it and I know now he didn't - he just used me and went back to his ex. That hurt so much. I would've rather he never said it at all.

Hey ho. He has definitely downgraded

nice one I know what you mean why lie?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive said it believing at the time it was real.. but after i knew it wasnt real...

So im now unsure what love actually is.. cos at the time ive said it i was so into that person id have done anything for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I fell in love with my ex b/f, I cried when I first told him. I had never felt as vulnerable before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Over-rated IMHO.

There are many other ways to express love and affection without uttering the L word.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I've said it an at the time believed it was true then realised it wasn't. Fessing up was 1 of the hardest things iv ever done as I know she did love me an posibly still does. I hated myself for it but it was far from on purpose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sometimes I think people get the definition of lust and love completely wrong. "

Exactly my thought.

I would not say it if I didn't mean it and once you know true love, it is irreplaceable.

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

I am wondering if ive ever been in love now they say you know so unsure

my lover told me it today but I do believe he means it not sure if I do though

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Ive said it believing at the time it was real.. but after i knew it wasnt real...

So im now unsure what love actually is.. cos at the time ive said it i was so into that person id have done anything for them.

ye I know what you mean x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id rather someone say i love you but im not IN love with you than have someone say 'i lust you'..

Perhaps im odd but lust just screams sexual desire where loving someone even on a low level implies emotions and caring.

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By *razilnutsMan
over a year ago

York

Love is such a subjective thing...

I can honestly say I loved every woman in my life, whether for 10 minutes or for 10 years!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never said it in that kind of context...I've said I love chocolate and things like that but have never said 'I Love You' to anyone, but I've never felt it so that's probably why! I had it said to me once and as horrible as it sounds that put the nail in the coffin because I knew I'd never return the feelings so had to end things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people. "

was it just to get in your knickers or like I said in my earlier post a genuine mistake ?

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

perhaps its about thinking if they say it they keep that person but its so wrong to make out you do

yes it does change someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have only ever said it when I really meant it. Unfortunately its a lie that trips out of the mouths of so many. It should never be said if it is not meant 100%.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have only ever said it when I really meant it. Unfortunately its a lie that trips out of the mouths of so many. It should never be said if it is not meant 100%.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Id rather someone say i love you but im not IN love with you than have someone say 'i lust you'..

Perhaps im odd but lust just screams sexual desire where loving someone even on a low level implies emotions and caring."

I believe you have to be in love to actually love another person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people. "

He might have loved you loads, he might have just said that to be cruel and hurt you. Some people are like that.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

To some, saying it is foreplay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

have you ever said it and not really meant it? or had someone say it to you when you know they don't

why?"

I have never said and not meant it, if I didn't love someone I would tell them but I have had it said to me when they didn't mean it, I think you should always be honest.

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By *exxifun5Couple
over a year ago

NORWICH

I thought I was in love for 18 years ... and one day I realised that u can love but love needs to be returned .... then tom came along and showed me real love and more importantly respect. Without respect there is no love ... and I couldn't be happier

(Sorry fir the mush lol )

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

They really do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've told 6 women I love them ... 4 partners, my mum and my sis. Meant it every time, at the time, but head over heels just the once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't wait to hear and say those words again

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

people who expoit it are arseholes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

was it just to get in your knickers or like I said in my earlier post a genuine mistake ? "

He is a sociopath xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can't wait to hear and say those words again "

I love your t-shirt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

He might have loved you loads, he might have just said that to be cruel and hurt you. Some people are like that.

He just wanted to hurt me from day one

Always said I'd never get caught out like that, but I missed all the signs x

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

people who expoit it are arseholes"

Yeah....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

Don't give them the chance in the first place by not wearing one's heart on one's sleeve. Works for me!

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

He might have loved you loads, he might have just said that to be cruel and hurt you. Some people are like that.

He just wanted to hurt me from day one

Always said I'd never get caught out like that, but I missed all the signs x"

I will always be cautious now yes my lover says it but hes so jealous too but I don't know

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

was it just to get in your knickers or like I said in my earlier post a genuine mistake ?

He is a sociopath xx"

arrr I see sorry

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"People expose their vulnerabilities, their hopes & desires.

People who exploit have the golden ticket to your heart.

Don't give them the chance in the first place by not wearing one's heart on one's sleeve. Works for me!

surely that's easier said than done though least it is for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've said it and meant it i loved my ex and a saml part of me still dose no one should say it an less they mean it

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

I should have shown this one the door when I realised he was not true

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By *ittle nelWoman
over a year ago

Merseyside

big difference between loving someone an being in love with someone I think. I'd never say it unless I meant it an I hope that they'd already know from my actions etc how I felt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

He might have loved you loads, he might have just said that to be cruel and hurt you. Some people are like that.

He just wanted to hurt me from day one

Always said I'd never get caught out like that, but I missed all the signs x"

There are no signs, it's not your fault. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say it to my special friends sometimes .. In a non bunny boiling way of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes you can love someone as a person but not be in love with them

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Sometimes you can love someone as a person but not be in love with them "

Absolutely. I find it easier to tell the people I love but in love with that I love them. I'm much more cautious about saying I love you when I feel in love as being in love and being in lust have a similar feel at times. They both border on madness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ive said it believing at the time it was real.. but after i knew it wasnt real...

So im now unsure what love actually is.. cos at the time ive said it i was so into that person id have done anything for them.

This

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I've only told three guys I love you. I tell my friends all the while. Tell jay about 10 times aday

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Sometimes I think people get the definition of lust and love completely wrong. "

Too true, I used to

Ryan, but sadly it never worked out

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

have you ever said it and not really meant it? or had someone say it to you when you know they don't

why?"

No and no.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel"

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!"

That is so sad, the man must have been an absolute rat. I'm sure she deserved a man who could have at least treated her with respect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never said it and not meant it. Saying that, I have only ever used the word love twice. My childrends father and my ex...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have truly been in head over heals love once. On paper we are perfect together in the real world it just doesn't work. We are mates and I hope always will be and when I said I loved him I meant it and still do I'm just not in love with him anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The man from my last relationship told me he never loved me or fancied me when we split.

Never had a relationship since, lies like that can change people.

He might have loved you loads, he might have just said that to be cruel and hurt you. Some people are like that.

He just wanted to hurt me from day one

Always said I'd never get caught out like that, but I missed all the signs x

There are no signs, it's not your fault. x"

I have stopped blaming myself and realise he had serious issues and manipulated me but it has changed my perspective, I don't trust easily and take compliments with a pinch of salt. xx

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!"

that is terrible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel"

People say different things at different times and they may have meant it at the time but don't now. Often people deny they never did after being hurt themselves rather than in coming out of the blue. maybe something upsetting was said to prompt this response.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

That is so sad, the man must have been an absolute rat. I'm sure she deserved a man who could have at least treated her with respect

Thing is from the get go we knew it wouldn't end well: never liked him! She met another loser that dumped her when she became pregnant...she sure can pick em, bless her!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I say it when I mean it....words are often like promises and are only comfort to a fool

thou speakest wiser than thou art ware of.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

that is terrible"

Turned her from a stunning, happy woman to a very angry and bitter person sadly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

that is terrible

Turned her from a stunning, happy woman to a very angry and bitter person sadly.

Reading that has left me gobsmacked , I can only imagine the damage that did to her

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

maybe these rats that say they love someone too easily get their cummupance and end up lonely and realise what they lost cos they can never go back

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

that is terrible

Turned her from a stunning, happy woman to a very angry and bitter person sadly.

Reading that has left me gobsmacked , I can only imagine the damage that did to her

You have no idea. He absolutely loathed fat women but was too scared to say anything to my other sister and I or we'd have ripped him a new one!

My sister went from a size 6 to 18 when she had their daughter, she never really lost it and he was really, really nasty to her.

Funding his studies in America for three years, providing him with four bed detached house, Land Rover to drive, a daughter and love counted for nothing. Cheated, left her, remarried, got half the house that my sister and dad bought. They didn't take my advise to legalise the transaction, he ended up with "my" legacy.

Nasty piece of work. I know I'm being totally unfair and irrational, but my niece is the spitting image of her dad, can't warm to her and I feel awful.

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"the LOVE word

its very hurtful when you thought someone loved you then they say they never had very very cruel

My sisters husband, when he was leaving her said "what part of I don't like you let alone love you don't you get? Never have but you were a way of escaping my parents?"

Left her absolutely devastated!

that is terrible

Turned her from a stunning, happy woman to a very angry and bitter person sadly.

Reading that has left me gobsmacked , I can only imagine the damage that did to her

You have no idea. He absolutely loathed fat women but was too scared to say anything to my other sister and I or we'd have ripped him a new one!

My sister went from a size 6 to 18 when she had their daughter, she never really lost it and he was really, really nasty to her.

Nasty piece of work. I know I'm being totally unfair and irrational, but my niece is the spitting image of her dad, can't warm to her and I feel awful. "

some men are beyond belief

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only ever say it when I mean it and it's the most wonderful thing to hear when meant. But I don't think it is enough in itself. I think by the time you hear/say the word it should be pretty evident in so many other ways that that is how a person feels. Love needs to be demonstrated too.

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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago

hertfordshire

"I only ever say it when I mean it and it's the most wonderful thing to hear when meant. But I don't think it is enough in itself. I think by the time you hear/say the word it should be pretty evident in so many other ways that that is how a person feels. Love needs to be demonstrated too."

that's so true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i used to say it to my ex, as i thought thats what i felt, but it seemed it wasnt, because since me and V got together, the feelings i have for her are so intense, and totally different to anything i felt for my ex.

i agree, the word is used way to easily, and possibly in the wrong context, but you can only go with what your heart tells you at the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

that's so true"

Yes, I think so but all too often forgotten.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I say it when I mean it....words are often like promises and are only comfort to a fool

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