FabSwingers.com forum: She does, he does, she dont.........

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My mate is a swingle and the fella she sees is a swingle but............

She thinking longterm with him and he still doing his thing with others.....

Now then....

She stopped seeing anyone else and i reckon she falling for him...

He on the other hand is still happy seeing her and enjoying it but happy to see others.

I dont want her becomming a bunnyboiler...etc...But reckon she may...

as in...

Im not seeing anyone else so i dont want you to see anyone else. etc.

Texts him constantly etc and talks about him non stop.

Now im trying to say this aint healthy and its worrying me bigtime cuz im the one in the middle....i know who he playing with apart from her. etc.

And no....he aint the sort to be faithful to one

What the hell do i do ??????????

Why do these women do this eh ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Leave them alone to sort it out amongst themselves.

Otherwise, if anything does go wrong, you could be blamed for interferring, friends or no friends!

Good luck!

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

oh i smell big trouble ahead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

imho you need to sit your friend down and remind her its swinging not dating.....sorry to be so blunt if their ment to be then it will eventually fall into place if not then shes going to make herself look a little sill

respect to your friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"imho you need to sit your friend down and remind her its swinging not dating.....sorry to be so blunt if their ment to be then it will eventually fall into place if not then shes going to make herself look a little silly

respect to your friend

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

exactly......

its swinging and NOT dating as i keep telling her.

I reckon i have done my bit in telling her whatever and now its up to her.

And god help her if she comes back with...

"why didnt you tell me"

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

did he ask her to stop seeing others or has she done it of her own free will??

if he asked hr to stop but is carrying i think that is a bit off

if she did it of her own free will then that is her decision to live with

has he ever hinted about being a couple??

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By *iamondladyWoman
over a year ago

titsville

As you say the female is moving away from swinging and into relationship area and she is changing things by her feelings. It is difficult because if she follows her feelings and he doesn't agree then she risks loosing him altogether.

I would suggest pointing out to her face to face in a gentle way what are the pros and cons of her actions and how things may turn out.

Then all you can do is leave it to her and then at least you know that u told her what may happen but the rest is up to them. Pearl's advice is good if u don't have the relationship where she will listen to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"exactly......

its swinging and NOT dating as i keep telling her.

I reckon i have done my bit in telling her whatever and now its up to her.

And god help her if she comes back with...

"why didnt you tell me"

Hmmm has your friend swung at all and if so for long sounds like shes head over heels in lust

you see people proclaiming there undying love quite regularly even as we get older some people struggle to dystinguish

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Never asked her to stop, never hinted about bieng a cpl etc.

Its all in her mind im afraid....thinks he cares because he is a considerate lover, which is nice but dont mean he wants to marry her ffs.

And she had her first real orgasm with him...

I really wanna kick her up the ass but then i dont because she really in a pickle and she my mate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i think you should leave them to it, its a hard place to be and if you say anything she might not thank you for it.. I was in a similar position myself..When I met ian it was just sex at first but then I went and fell for him

, never thought he would feel the same but the more we saw each other the more he became hooked and now we are a proper couple.

so be there for ya friend by all means but just be careful yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will he or she read this?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do nowt, keep out of it cos either way if it goes tits up, you'll get the blame because you said something or you'll get the blame because you didn't

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Its so easy to look into someone elses relationship from the outside and try and offer advice

She does'nt want to listen to you at the moment Peaches so the only thing you can do is be there like the good friend you are if it all goes tits up.....you can see it coming but she is blinded by thoughts of love at the moment

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

They not on here. thankfully.

and yerrr reckon they both adult and know the score so leave um to it.

I been seeing my man for over two years and altho i think the world of him , i wouldnt ever think we was a cpl cuz we aint.

we have good fun together and enjoy that time we have. and thats how i likes it.

chill out and loads of lust

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For some reason most of the people I know confide stuff to me, often I will have both partners in my living room moaning about the same thing at different times.

I learnt the hard way plead all ignorance cos it will only cause a falling out and really all I could do is say what I would do in the same situation, not what they should do, cos we are all different and what I would do isnt what others would do.

I have also lost friends cos I told them something I prob shouldnt have but when asked outright "did you know" I have to tell the truth - I seem to be missing the "think before opening mouth" gene when put on the spot

but I think dont ask the question if you dont want the answer.

So Peaches if I was you I would say nothing and be ready with the hugs and tea when it all falls down around your mate.

Shona

x x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i wish i had you lots tact and diplomacy!!

i tend to say what i think and it usually ends up trouble but im usually right!!

we humans are complex things arent we!

as my old granny used to say you cant always get what you want and whats for you wont go bye you!

its a bad position to be in, the one that the friends in and most of us will have been there at some point in our lives and sometimes we cant see the woods for the trees xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does he know she likes him as much as you say??

If he doesnt know, maybe you should tell him decide how to deal with it.

He may:

1. remind her that its swinging and a bit of fun.

2. not see her again

3. he might feel the same about her but doesnt want to scare her off.

Whichever way it goes, it would be better for your friend before she gets totally smitten and then broken hearted. Good luck xx

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