FabSwingers.com forum: Farting

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

Ewww - or fucking funny????????????

Sorry - buti cant help but laugh when someone lets rip!!!

Esp if they not sure how you gonna react and you look at there face while you keep a straight one.

Never grew outta that one.

To me FARTS ARE FUNNY!!!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Formula Ford ones are

(formula ford aka fanny farts)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

well ladies, thank you for your excellent company. I'm off to fart in bed. And yes, my farts do smell of roses xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"well ladies, thank you for your excellent company. I'm off to fart in bed. And yes, my farts do smell of roses xx"

Good!!!!

Mine smell of Tulips

Camping morning farts are still the best!!!

Cant even hide em as everyone can hear!!!

lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We were at a company conference about 10yrs ago, and as the conference was getting underway, our chairman tripped as he stepped forward and knocked the mike stand over and he dropped his speach notes.

His secretary ran forward to help and as she bent down to pick the notes up, she let one rip, straight into the mike. Fookin 'ell, it was Condorde taking off

The poor lass was overcome with embarrassment and we didn't see her again at that meeting

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Farting is a hobby of mines.

Nothing more satisfying when letting rip a stoater and the smell chokes others around you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"We were at a company conference about 10yrs ago, and as the conference was getting underway, our chairman tripped as he stepped forward and knocked the mike stand over and he dropped his speach notes.

His secretary ran forward to help and as she bent down to pick the notes up, she let one rip, straight into the mike. Fookin 'ell, it was Condorde taking off

The poor lass was overcome with embarrassment and we didn't see her again at that meeting

lmao

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

Be loud, Be Proud, and above all Be smelly

just save them up to drop in crowded lifts!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Debs is the queen of farts, she blew the roof of my house when she stayed. Thought we had been bombed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago

Back of Beyond

Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm,

But the woman I was giving oral to at a recent party absolutely freaking stank!! I mean it couldn't have been worse if I had stuck my nose in a bucket of shit! She could have warned me before hand

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm,

But the woman I was giving oral to at a recent party absolutely freaking stank!! I mean it couldn't have been worse if I had stuck my nose in a bucket of shit! She could have warned me before hand

LMFAO!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *-and-KCouple
over a year ago

Back of Beyond

"Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm,

But the woman I was giving oral to at a recent party absolutely freaking stank!! I mean it couldn't have been worse if I had stuck my nose in a bucket of shit! She could have warned me before hand

LMFAO!!!!

Its funny now, but at the time it put me off for the rest of the night, I could physically taste it in my mouth, not nice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm,

But the woman I was giving oral to at a recent party absolutely freaking stank!! I mean it couldn't have been worse if I had stuck my nose in a bucket of shit! She could have warned me before hand

LMFAO!!!!

Its funny now, but at the time it put me off for the rest of the night, I could physically taste it in my mouth, not nice

I'm sorry, but that has literally got me crying with laughter. And I bet your eyes were watering too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm"

really? i think i would mind if someone farted while i was giving them oral!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if someone farted whilst i was giving them oral i would be sick

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Quite frankly debz.

I dont find it funny at all

You will never hear me fart or talk about it.

Very unladylike im sure

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Quite frankly debz.

I dont find it funny at all

You will never hear me fart or talk about it.

Very unladylike im sure

oooooo peaches ya fibber

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shhhhhhhhhh

its true i tells ya

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

"Now I don't mind ladies farting especially during oral, I know its difficult to control muscle spasms at such a time as orgasm,

But the woman I was giving oral to at a recent party absolutely freaking stank!! I mean it couldn't have been worse if I had stuck my nose in a bucket of shit! She could have warned me before hand

LMFAO!!!!

Its funny now, but at the time it put me off for the rest of the night, I could physically taste it in my mouth, not nice

"
me thinks was rimming like

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Shhhhhhhhhh

its true i tells ya

oh Peaches me lover - i did think of you!!!!

HEHEEEEE

And Diamonds - at least my blowing off made you aware that i was awake- well i was after THAT one anyway, hehehehe xxxx

I heard a joke the other day, two people having sex and the lady farted.

Blo9ke says OMG what was that,

Lady says - my front hole was so happy with what you were doing that my back hole blew you a kiss!!!!

hehehehehehe

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Shhhhhhhhhh

its true i tells ya

oh Peaches me lover - i did think of you!!!!

HEHEEEEE

And Diamonds - at least my blowing off made you aware that i was awake- well i was after THAT one anyway, hehehehe xxxx

I heard a joke the other day, two people having sex and the lady farted.

Blo9ke says OMG what was that,

Lady says - my front hole was so happy with what you were doing that my back hole blew you a kiss!!!!

hehehehehehe"

Mine are quite musical ya know

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Shhhhhhhhhh

Mine are quite musical ya know

I know hun - i can hear them from here!!!!

Only about 40 miles from you and am up wind - so to speak!!! LOL xxxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I done once walking into my sons bedroom...it sounded like i had said. "hellooooo"

hahahahah he didnt think it was funny but i was on the floor.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

nothing wrong with a fart its mother nature

but imagine farting in a court

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"I done once walking into my sons bedroom...it sounded like i had said. "hellooooo"

hahahahah he didnt think it was funny but i was on the floor.

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And...........

I farted once at mcvities ..in one of the basement loos while me and a mate was having a crafty fag.

She thought some fooker was knocking on the windows.

Ive never seen her move so fast and put the fag out. lmao

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And...........

I farted once at mcvities ..in one of the basement loos while me and a mate was having a crafty fag.

She thought some fooker was knocking on the windows.

Ive never seen her move so fast and put the fag out. lmao

She was being polite, pretending she thought it was a knocking on the window, she was actually worried about the methane explosion!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pmsl.......

an old boyfriend of mine who was scottish used to say.....

"sniff up, the abc of vitimins are floating in the air"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *heWolfMan
over a year ago

warwickshire

I heard a joke the other day, two people having sex and the lady farted.

Blo9ke says OMG what was that,

Lady says - my front hole was so happy with what you were doing that my back hole blew you a kiss!!!!

hehehehehehe"

I thought you were going to tell of the geezer who had led a sheltered life indulging in his first 69 when the woman farted.

She apologised, he gritted his teeth and carried on but a few seconds later she dropped another one, a real eye-waterer.

At that point he gets up and says, "I'm sorry, but we've got to stop. I don't think I can bear another 67 of those"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

When i was kid - about 2 years ago..lol

My dad used to do BIG stinky farts.

He used to trap me head between his legs and tell me to breathe deep.

If you breathe deep he said, the smell will go away quicker"!!!!

lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"I done once walking into my sons bedroom...it sounded like i had said. "hellooooo"

hahahahah he didnt think it was funny but i was on the floor.

I am crying laughing here

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my brother used to keep his farts in a quality street tin, under his bed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????"

Chicken

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never grown up and farts just make me howl, childish i know but I can't help it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????

Chicken

ya do the dance too???

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????

Chicken

ya do the dance too???

Cant help but flap your arms in time to the beat...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I done once walking into my sons bedroom...it sounded like i had said. "hellooooo"

hahahahah he didnt think it was funny but i was on the floor.

That really did make me laugh!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ig badMan
over a year ago

Up North :-)

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????

Chicken

ya do the dance too???

Cant help but flap your arms in time to the beat...

Your still thinking chickens aint ya

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a sad arse that never rejoices!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember when i was going to school aged 12 or 13 and i followed through.

Now that was a fart!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Trumps with lumps..........not good

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Farts that sound like Bird call are funny...

What bird that be then Snoggy????

Chicken

ya do the dance too???

Cant help but flap your arms in time to the beat...

Your still thinking chickens aint ya

Barrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!

LOL

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ebzStar OP Woman
over a year ago

Notting

"Trumps with lumps..........not good

trumps with lumps - love it!!!!

Hehehehehe

I remember once at my mates and i farted - and it sounded wet - she said - ewwww did you follow thru - i repsonded taughtly NO I HAVNET - stuck my hand down the back of my pants and ran off!!!!

MY god did we laugh =- and nearly caused another spurt!!!!

LOL

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

did you know that when you fart in the bath, it says waterbottle, waterbottle, waterbottle

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"did you know that when you fart in the bath, it says waterbottle, waterbottle, waterbottle

"
you have far too much time on your hands lol, why are men fascinated with farts anyway....and they pull a fart face too.........whats all that about

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"did you know that when you fart in the bath, it says waterbottle, waterbottle, waterbottle

you have far too much time on your hands lol, why are men fascinated with farts anyway....and they pull a fart face too.........whats all that about "

Why are females fascinated about farts that they have to start a thread about them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"did you know that when you fart in the bath, it says waterbottle, waterbottle, waterbottle

you have far too much time on your hands lol, why are men fascinated with farts anyway....and they pull a fart face too.........whats all that about

Why are females fascinated about farts that they have to start a thread about them

"
you answer mine and il answer yours!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *zMaleMan
over a year ago

penzance

This post is sooooooooooooooo funny it's got me pissing out straight.

reminds me of a joke.

A cpl just got together and feeling amorous the girl says I fancy a 69, bloke says yeah I'm game but whats a 69? So she explains and they get into position as as he gets his head down between her legs she lets rip a snorter,the guy lifts his head and says fucks me love I can't stand another 68 of them.

Well it tickled me when I first heard it about 40 yrs ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"This post is sooooooooooooooo funny it's got me pissing out straight.

reminds me of a joke.

Well it tickled me when I first heard it about 40 yrs ago

"
fuck me.....A MAN WHO CAN PISS STRAIGHT!!!!! LMAO

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *zMaleMan
over a year ago

penzance

Wellllllllllllllllllllll when it hangs in the bowl you can't miss

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *zMaleMan
over a year ago

penzance

In my fucking dreams it does anyway lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"did you know that when you fart in the bath, it says waterbottle, waterbottle, waterbottle

you have far too much time on your hands lol, why are men fascinated with farts anyway....and they pull a fart face too.........whats all that about "

And lift their leg

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

farts are funny , natural thing for the body to do , dont see the point in being red faced about it , got to be done , but do love the ones where you know other people are looking at you thinking what the hell has that boy eaten lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best ones have to be silent and deadly in a lift.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i cant stop laughin here!!! farts are funny and anyone who doesnt find them amusin is a borin fart!!!

to up the league .......... the fanny fart!! cracks me up everytime excuse the pun!! xxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"my brother used to keep his farts in a quality street tin, under his bed

PMSL

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do fanny farts smell?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nooooooo

little puffs of jamine wind...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nooooooo

little puffs of jamine wind...

Orrrrrrr

mackerel...if she aint washed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Nooooooo

little puffs of jamine wind...

Orrrrrrr

mackerel...if she aint washed

or has BV lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread