FabSwingers.com forum: Most Quotable Comedies Ever

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

Monty Pythons Quest for the Holy Grail is my all time favorite.

Spaceballs is a close second for me. Contains my absolute favorite movie quote.

"Now you know why evil will always triumph....because good...is dumb. "

Anyone else have something to offer?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Life of Brian: "he wanks as high as any man in wome!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

Yep... Monty Python wins hands down... Also "a fish called Wanda" and "Shreck"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'At least we got the duck'

'Eddie, what in the name of Greek buggery is the use of a plastic duck?'

'It floats in the bath!'

'But WHY?'

'Its hollow?'

'Tch, I mean WHY THE DUCK?'

'It came free with the telly!'

'Eddie EVERYTHING came free with the telly we were LOOTING! Why didn't you just get a free telly with the telly?'

'BECAUSE IT'D SINK IN THE BATH!'

Bottom, comedy gold

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" i'll ave two round, two pointy and a bag a gravel "

Cracks me everytime

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

Life of Brian no doubt. Bloody Splitter.

A Fish Called Wanda was hilarious. Fierce Creatures was a surprisingly good follow-up as well I thought.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

[Removed by poster at 10/09/13 21:47:21]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

He is not the messiah... He's a very naughty boy!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He is not the messiah... He's a very naughty boy!

I'd already put that in the poor grammar thread. But, like sex, can never get enough of it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rik Mayal Reading ' Georges Marvellous Medicine' on Jackanory

" grandma's mouth was all brown and puckered ....like a dog's bum "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whats the romans everdone for us eh ".........

" well they built the agueduct!! "....

" ok apart frm the aqueduct, whats the romans done for us? "....

" they built the roads"....

" apart frm the aqueducts, the roads whats the fucking romans done for us"......

" well its alot safer at night".....

" apart frm the aqueduct, the roads and safer at night, whats the fucking romans done for us????

Wankers "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

"Rik Mayal Reading ' Georges Marvellous Medicine' on Jackanory

" grandma's mouth was all brown and puckered ....like a dog's bum "

Haaaaaaaaaa.... Made my tea come out my nose.. Brilliant

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

So that the men (and the women!).............

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

Look....if we built this large wooden badger.......

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

wonely ... im so wonely

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

Just popped on "life of Brian" because of this thread xxx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

What.....behind the rabbit?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ark Gr8 Teddy BearMan
over a year ago

Wigan

The adventures of Sherlock Holmes smarter younger brother. "Yahhhh"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brian: Please, please, please listen! I've got one or two things to say.

The Crowd: Tell us! Tell us both of them!

Brian: Look, you've got it all wrong! You don't NEED to follow ME, You don't NEED to follow ANYBODY! You've got to think for your selves! You're ALL individuals!

The Crowd: Yes! We're all individuals!

Brian: You're all different!

The Crowd: Yes, we ARE all different!

Man in crowd: I'm not...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Four candles .....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *utmegsMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think

"Four candles ..... "

Os. Os.

Mon repose! Os

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *utmegsMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think

The entry in my diary today was one word. Simply says "Bugger".

Blackadder goes forth

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Insist E Blackadder be projectionist STOP.

PS Don't ever let him STOP.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Four candles .....

Os. Os.

Mon repose! Os"

Pure comedy genius

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

More Barker genius ...

"Good evening. I am the president of the Loyal Society for the Relief of Suffers from Pismronunciation, for the relief of people who can't say their worms correctly, or who use the wrong worms entirely, so that other people cannot underhand a bird they are spraying. It's just that you open your mouse, and the worms come turbling out in wuck a say that you dick not what you're thugging to be, and it's very distressing."

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not even out... I just popped out... I wasn't going out out...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

"Its not dead...Its pining for the fjords."

Just cant beat Python!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh woe is me, never again will i gaze upon Englands shores, i will miss her rolling hills, her lush green meadows

......and her playful sheep ..... Baaaa

God it smells like a pair of armoured trousers after the 100 years war in here, BALDRICK....have you been eating dung again

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Brian: Please, please, please listen! I've got one or two things to say.

The Crowd: Tell us! Tell us both of them!

Brian: Look, you've got it all wrong! You don't NEED to follow ME, You don't NEED to follow ANYBODY! You've got to think for your selves! You're ALL individuals!

The Crowd: Yes! We're all individuals!

Brian: You're all different!

The Crowd: Yes, we ARE all different!

Man in crowd: I'm not...

"
pmsl xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illwill69uMan
over a year ago

moston

It's only a flesh wound!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

A bit long, but still my favourite Python sketch.

What's the point of going abroad if you're just another tourist carted around in buses surrounded by sweaty mindless oafs from Kettering and Boventry in their cloth caps and their cardigans and their transistor radios and their Sunday Mirrors, bomplaining about the tea - 'Oh they don't make it properly here, do they, not like at home' - and stopping at Majorcan bodegas selling fish and chips and Watney's Red Barrel and calamaris and two veg and sitting in their cotton frocks squirting Timothy White's suncream all over their puffy raw swollen purulent flesh 'cos they 'overdid it on the first day.'

And being herded into endless Hotel Miramars and Bellvueses and Bontinentales with their modern international luxury roomettes and draught Red Barrel and swimming pools full of fat German businessmen pretending they're acrobats forming pyramids and frightening the children and barging into queues and if you're not at your table spot on seven you miss the bowl of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, the first item on the menu of International Cuisine, and every Thursday night the hotel has a bloody cabaret in the bar, featuring a tiny emaciated dago with nine-inch hips and some bloated fat tart with her hair brylcreemed down and a big arse presenting Flamenco for Foreigners.

And then some adenoidal typists from Birmingham with flabby white legs and diarrhoea trying to pick up hairy bandy-legged wop waiters called Manuel and once a week there's an excursion to the local Roman Ruins to buy cherryade and melted ice cream and bleeding Watney's Red Barrel and one evening you visit the so called typical restaurant with local colour and atmosphere and you sit next to a party from Rhyl who keep singing 'Torremolinos, torremolinos' and complaining about the food - 'It's so greasy here, isn't it?' - and you get cornered by some d*unken greengrocer from Luton with an Instamatic camera and Dr. Scholl sandals and last Tuesday's Daily Express and he drones on and on and on about how Mr. Smith should be running this country and how many languages Enoch Powell can speak and then he throws up over the Cuba Libres.

And sending tinted postcards of places they don't realise they haven't even visited to 'All at number 22, weather wonderful, our room is marked with an 'X'

Food very greasy but we've found a charming little local place hidden away in the back streets....where they serve Watney's Red Barrel and cheese and onion....... Shut up SHUT UP!!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any Ron burgandy quote from anchorman!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Del Trotter "I like duck a la orange; what do they call duck in the French language?"

Rodney "canard"

Del "you right its F-ing hard!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suit you sir?

Dogging at the weekend sir?

Oh, suit you sir!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adgod OP Couple
over a year ago

Greensburg

What's the matter Colonel Sanders......chicken??

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Homer J Simpson

Homer...'my brain is going a million miles a second'

cut to brain, two chimps scratching

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Half a dinar for my Bloody life story

Theres no pleasing some people

Thats just what Jesus said

Crucafixtion???? Out the door first on the left.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *etanreadyCouple
over a year ago

dover

"Four candles ..... "

you mean fork handles lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One more turn del boy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

physkick you've spelt it wrong

phoenix nights series 1

pure quality

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Life of Brian and bottom!

Gasman: Hello, I'm the gasman. Can I read your meter?

Richie: Why, hello Mr Gasman!

Eddie: [mouthing] What?

Richie: Hello Mr Gasman!

Gasman: Yes hello, I was wondering...

Eddie: [mouthing] What?

Richie: [shouting] GASMAN! GASMAN! GASMAN!

Gasman: Do you have someone who looks after you? Can I see them please cause I need to read your meter.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

Fawlty towers, and the deaf woman who wants a room with a sea view......

Basil Fawlty...."And what do you expect to see out of a torquay hotel window? The hanging gardens of Babylon, Herds of Wildebeast sweeping majestically accross the plains"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

Fawlty towers again when a rat is found in the biscuit tin....

Basil Fawlty....."errr, anyone care for a rat" lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

Only Fools and Horses, to Hull and back, Del boy, uncle albert and rodney lost at sea...

Uncle Albert..."look concorde"

Del boy..."Well, mmm, what?"

Uncle albert..."Up there, concorde"

Del boy...."so?"

Uncle albert...."I'm just saying, concorde"

Del boy..."I don't believe this, i'm gonna kill him, the soppy old git"

Lmao

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

"Fawlty towers, and the deaf woman who wants a room with a sea view......

Basil Fawlty...."And what do you expect to see out of a torquay hotel window? The hanging gardens of Babylon, Herds of Wildebeast sweeping majestically accross the plains"

Basil.....what breed of dog is that

Lady guest...its a little shih tzu

Basil...it certainly is

love this because I have one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Life of Brian . Am Brian and so is my wife. Funny as fuck that is

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issHottieBottieWoman
over a year ago

Kent

"Fawlty towers, and the deaf woman who wants a room with a sea view......

Basil Fawlty...."And what do you expect to see out of a torquay hotel window? The hanging gardens of Babylon, Herds of Wildebeast sweeping majestically accross the plains"

Love faulty towers! Can picture him saying it as well. So funny x the funniest one was the talking Moose head!! X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Has to be be Blackadder.

I have a plan so cunning you could hang a tail on it and call it a weasel.

If you want something doing, kill Baldrick first.

My life is strewn with cowpats from the Devils own satanic herd!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Has to be be Blackadder.

I have a plan so cunning you could hang a tail on it and call it a weasel.

If you want something doing, kill Baldrick first.

My life is strewn with cowpats from the Devils own satanic herd!"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

Phoenix Nights

BRIAN POTTER:

It's a family fun day man, there's kiddies running around. They can't go jumping up and down on a love length.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ushandkittyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Phoenix Nights

BRIAN POTTER:

It's a family fun day man, there's kiddies running around. They can't go jumping up and down on a love length."

I got a bloke in t'ospital wit' rubber burns!!

Isn't he a Scottish poet????

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entaur_UKMan
over a year ago

Cannock

"Fawlty towers, and the deaf woman who wants a room with a sea view......

Basil Fawlty...."And what do you expect to see out of a torquay hotel window? The hanging gardens of Babylon, Herds of Wildebeast sweeping majestically accross the plains"

Love faulty towers! Can picture him saying it as well. So funny x the funniest one was the talking Moose head!! X"

The Moose head one funny as fook, and the one when the car breaks down and Basil gives it a damn good thrashing, lol x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

Like the beard Balders gives me something to hang on to.

Smoke me a kipper....

Good night and may your god go with you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *utmegsMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think

"Has to be be Blackadder.

My life is strewn with cowpats from the Devils own satanic herd!"

Oh God! Once more Satan vomits on my eiderdown.

Escuse mee Miester.

PS did anyone else find themseves saying "C. Big blue wobbly thing mermaids live in" when Paxman introduced questions about Dr Johnson's Dictionary on University Challenge the other night.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread