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go with gut feeling or be the better person????

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

two of my kids are with their dad ....for last few days ...had son phone me numerous times in tears ....when talk to the ex get told im interfering in their relationship .....my parents are with me at mo and are going home tomoz ...near to where ex is .....should i go and get my kids or let them have the last few days with him ?????

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"two of my kids are with their dad ....for last few days ...had son phone me numerous times in tears ....when talk to the ex get told im interfering in their relationship .....my parents are with me at mo and are going home tomoz ...near to where ex is .....should i go and get my kids or let them have the last few days with him ?????"

If you are genuinely concerned and have reason to believe he isn't looking after them, they are distressed and not coping etc then yes go get them

If it's not that bad and they are just bored or whatever then like you said - its only a few days, surely they could cope knowing they'll be home soon

No one but you knows whats best at the end of the day!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

if he is in tears and wants to come home, go for him.

you will know him better than anyone, if he is likely to try and play one against the other.... have the chat

good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

one is fine and enjoying herself ....its my boy he sounds really tired and very tearful which i know all the signs of when he needs a few chill days ....its the longest time he had them in 3 years we been split.....hes a child that can be on go all day but needs a good night sleep as well

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"one is fine and enjoying herself ....its my boy he sounds really tired and very tearful which i know all the signs of when he needs a few chill days ....its the longest time he had them in 3 years we been split.....hes a child that can be on go all day but needs a good night sleep as well "

When your boy is tired but with you does someone come and take him ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe, if you haven't already, advise your ex that he seems to need a good nights sleep as he gets a bit grouchy when he's tired.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

and his son is much the same ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"and his son is much the same ..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should know what's best for your kids , but then again he is there father and all bit if there unhappy then you need to find out why ! How often do they spend time with there dad anyway ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This will go on forever, can't go worrying now. So long as they are safe then as much as it hurts leave it be. So difficult with separations and kids will always be the stumbling block. Good luck its never easy but work hard and happiness will be yours and most importantly for your children x

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

How would you feel if when your son is back with you he decides to call his father in tears when he is tired and his father then turns up and whisks him away for some time away from you?

Your children are lucky enough to have two parents. They deserve to have the normal good and bad moments with both parents. As their father he deserves to have happy and grouchy kids issues to deal with and to figure out how to handle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you go, your son has won, and it just reinforces his control or manipulation of you, this isn't about safety, its about a child playing one parent off against the other

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