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Heartbroken

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

3 of my 4 kids live with there dad and my youngest tonight asked for her dad and he came and got her as she doesn't want to get up early for me to go to work ! Am I over reacting or am I right ? I just feel I've lost everything for not being in love ?

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

awww im sure they miss their mum and be glad to see you xxx hugs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs. But remember, they grow up quickly and hopefully will realise that mom was doing her best by working hard and loved her kids regardless.

Its gonna be hard hun , but just let them know that you will be there if they need you or ...change their minds.

Good luck

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By *andWCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs "

Really???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"3 of my 4 kids live with there dad and my youngest tonight asked for her dad and he came and got her as she doesn't want to get up early for me to go to work ! Am I over reacting or am I right ? I just feel I've lost everything for not being in love ? "

how cum they all dont live with u???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???"

Yup....i know...ive had one

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It is refreshing to read that mum and dad share the responsibility of their children... Too often it is only 1 party.

Good luck and I am sure it will resolve to both your satisfaction.

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By *upitersmileCouple
over a year ago

Manchester


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one "

Haha... I was one!!

Took until I had my own children for me to realise the hell I put my mum through. And now she tells me it's pay back time....I've 3 girls

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By *andWCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one "

I have 2 never thought of them as 'heartless little shits' though x

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria


"Kids are heartless little shits, only thinking of their own needs. "

Fixed that for ya...know I was only bothered about myself as a kid

OP, as others have said, it probably hurts like hell at the minute, but eventually your kids will realise the sacrifices you made to give them a good start in life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awww hugs for you hun

Thay know your doing everything for there further and that you love them don't freet over it x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There dad works from home some times and is in a great job before you judge I'm an admin manager and have to hit deadlines which includes long hours etc and have to be there like tomoz at 7 !!! Does that make me a bad mum ?? I'm only working so much to make things better for them ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one

I have 2 never thought of them as 'heartless little shits' though x"

I just know thru experience that some....not all. kids have their own adgenda ,even from an early age. And it would be foolish for us to think of them all as delightful little angels.

I certainly wasnt and turned my mother grey very early .

It wasnt until i had my son that i realised what i had done.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There dad works from home some times and is in a great job before you judge I'm an admin manager and have to hit deadlines which includes long hours etc and have to be there like tomoz at 7 !!! Does that make me a bad mum ?? I'm only working so much to make things better for them ???? "

Dont beat yourself up, your doing what needs to be done to earn a crust. They will realise soon enough .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it does not ! Im a full time working mum and everything i do is for my child mines 11 and i have sat and spoke to her and she fully understands that when mum works in come the treats and when shes at her dads mum gets her treats ...so dont feel bad xx

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"There dad works from home some times and is in a great job before you judge I'm an admin manager and have to hit deadlines which includes long hours etc and have to be there like tomoz at 7 !!! Does that make me a bad mum ?? I'm only working so much to make things better for them ???? "

It simply means you are doing what is needed to give your children the best you can. It is not a perfect world and sacrifices are constantly made.

They will understand in the future... Right now they don't get it... They will.

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By *andWCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd

Please don't get us wrong me and Scott both work full time and feel terrible through the holidays that we can't spend alot of time with the children, we just understand why they feel that way and don't think they do it to make us feel guilty x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Why am I being made to feel like such a bad mum for having a career ??

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By *adyA01Woman
over a year ago

Wellington

The only person making you feel bad is you hun. They are your kids and love you and therefore it is natural that they miss you when you are not there. I have 2 kids and my ex and I share them 50/50. I work very hard and spend a lot of time working at home too! Its hard but I need to pay the bills. I feel guilty all the time for not spending more time with them! But what's the alternative! Sit at home on the dole and living off the taxpayers. Never! Give yourself a break hun, they will understand one day xxx

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By *ucsparkMan
over a year ago

dudley


"Why am I being made to feel like such a bad mum for having a career ??"

As a father with care it is quite refreshing that you are both bothered about your children. As others have said just be there for them. Also a job is great but children need to come first at some point. Really hope it all works out for all of you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont know how old your kids are but i have always thought that mums should stay at home and look after their kids, not all of them though.

i know you need money to pay the bills but some people worry too much about spending money on their children instead of spending time with them.

you are lucky to have a decent job though and you must do whats right for you, not just your kids.

They wont be bothered about you much when they become teenagers, they will want to be with their mates all the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have choices to make, I gave up a well paid job 20 yrs ago to be full time carer for my father, who developed dementure, I went from £400 a week down to £35 a week, which wasn't enough, so I found a job that I could do on line, and love it, when my father died, I became free to live life how I wanted, so still work long hours on line, and phone, but now I am able to home rescues dogs and horses, my doctor said, basically I need someone or something to care for, I have found my place in the world, and love every minute of it.

My sister has always worked away from home mon to Friday, she has 4 children, and justified being away by her fantastic salary, saying its the only way as a single mum she could survive and give her kids everything she never had.

1 has become a drug addict, 1 is in prison for robbery,and 2 sit around waiting for handouts.

Looking back it wasn't the trainers, or phones, or money the kids needed, it was her time and experience and love.

I can only talk about my own experiences, I know some children who are deprived of their parents time go on to be very well balanced and happy people.

Most animals raise their young until they can survive without them,

luckily they don't watch television and get involved in advertising.

If we all look around our own home and see what we have paid hard earned money for and never use, its shocking!,

We live in a world dominated by money and greed.

Why not go back to the days when, family came first, we bartered our skills, and didn't need to join the rat race to keep up with the jones's.

Soon we wont have much choice, we will work just to buy food and pay for the petrol ( if there is any left) to go to work, to get money to pay to go to work.

Remember we have a choice about everything we do. Make sure you make the right choice for you, and don't cry about the consequences, each and every one of us can change, if we want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one

I have 2 never thought of them as 'heartless little shits' though x"

Thankfully I've never thought of my children as this either ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im sorry but i dont idealise kids, they can be selfish,manipulative and down right cruel in certain situations,

Ok so most parents think their little darlings are the best in the world and fail to see the truth, consequently,society has to bare the brunt.

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By *ittle nelWoman
over a year ago

Merseyside


"There dad works from home some times and is in a great job before you judge I'm an admin manager and have to hit deadlines which includes long hours etc and have to be there like tomoz at 7 !!! Does that make me a bad mum ?? I'm only working so much to make things better for them ???? "

i think its important to see you work, so they learn that things aren't handed to them. you are doing whats needed for your family. that's never wrong xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one

I have 2 never thought of them as 'heartless little shits' though x"

I have three, love them dearly, at 21, 25 and 30 they've never given me a moments worry, all work or in full time education but at times I think they are selfish, self absorbed, lazy little shits!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kids can be heartless little shits at times,only thinking of their own needs

Really???

Yup....i know...ive had one

I have 2 never thought of them as 'heartless little shits' though x

I have three, love them dearly, at 21, 25 and 30 they've never given me a moments worry, all work or in full time education but at times I think they are selfish, self absorbed, lazy little shits! "

we know what you mean.

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