FabSwingers.com forum: Economical with the truth

By *allen Madonna OP Woman
over a year ago

In my own little world

Been with a guy for almost a year, but he's very economical with the truth. It got to me recently, so I dumped him. Met him last night at a club, I still fancy him rotten, got a little more information out of him, but I don't know whether to pursue, as I feel that he's either keeping me in a box or at arms length. I'm very open minded and can't think of any circumstance that would be a deal breaker, but hate being deceived.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

[Removed by poster at 04/08/13 18:28:54]

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Its a difficult one. If you want a relationship with the guy then total honesty is probably needed. But if you don't then, as long as he isn't lying right out, you might just have to put up with him having secrets.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Avoid people like that like the plague....it won't be their heartbreak it will be yours...jog him on..so many other men about who will tell the truth this one sounds like he is having one over on you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always tell the truth...you know...

...if lying doesn't work the first time.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I always tell the truth...you know...

...if lying doesn't work the first time.

Or if you get found out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It sounds to me like he just wants to keep things private and separate from swinging or am I missing something? Maybe he doesn't want a relationship with a swinger?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If this guy has been this way for a year and it's bothered you, then I think in time it would get to you again.

Unless you can accept that he won't open up to you and will only tell you what he wants you to know, then it will cause frustration.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't go back. If it's pissed you off enough to dumb him once already is not ganna be different the second time.

Although he might not be doing it to keep you at arms lengths. It could be just how he is with everyone but either way you don't want a relationship where you feel you are being kept in the dark.

You deserve the best.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always tell the truth...you know...

...if lying doesn't work the first time.

Or if you get found out

My lies are so fucking good...I don't!

Disclaimer: For those who don't frequent the forums..this is a joke.

For those of you who do..you already kniw I'm joking!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"It sounds to me like he just wants to keep things private and separate from swinging or am I missing something? Maybe he doesn't want a relationship with a swinger?"

My initial thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a big thing for me cannot be honest or economical with the truth and it is over. I been burnt two times as I trusted to much.

Think with head on this one I say.

You are an amazing beautiful lady, you find a good man. I offer to take you and see how thing go, but we live to far part. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

perhaps its a good reason to reflect on how others use the site, it is aimed in a NSA manner, I can go months,years without repeat meets

I'm not gonna say there is anything wrong in this mans manner..as all I hear is one side of the story..

to be honest, I tend to avoid someone like the OP, if I feel i cant express myself how I wish on a swinging scene

bit blunt, but there u go

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By *ighland_RoseCouple
over a year ago

Brigadoon

Don't go back, never go back. You ended it for a reason and that reason will still be there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a big thing for me cannot be honest or economical with the truth and it is over. I been burnt two times as I trusted to much.

Think with head on this one I say.

You are an amazing beautiful lady, you find a good man. I offer to take you and see how thing go, but we live to far part. xx

Oh dear ............

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

Was he bothered when you "dumped" him??

If not.....Leave it be....

You obviously want more than he is willing to give..

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"perhaps its a good reason to reflect on how others use the site, it is aimed in a NSA manner, I can go months,years without repeat meets

I'm not gonna say there is anything wrong in this mans manner..as all I hear is one side of the story..

to be honest, I tend to avoid someone like the OP, if I feel i cant express myself how I wish on a swinging scene

bit blunt, but there u go"

Can't believes I'm saying this: I agree with you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a big thing for me cannot be honest or economical with the truth and it is over. I been burnt two times as I trusted to much.

Think with head on this one I say.

You are an amazing beautiful lady, you find a good man. I offer to take you and see how thing go, but we live to far part. xx

Oh dear ............"

Lol.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"It sounds to me like he just wants to keep things private and separate from swinging or am I missing something? Maybe he doesn't want a relationship with a swinger?"
thats what I thought, if he's not telling lies what's the problem in him not telling you all his business

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By *ancs MinxWoman
over a year ago

Burnley

"Don't go back, never go back. You ended it for a reason and that reason will still be there."

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"This is a big thing for me cannot be honest or economical with the truth and it is over. I been burnt two times as I trusted to much.

Think with head on this one I say.

You are an amazing beautiful lady, you find a good man. I offer to take you and see how thing go, but we live to far part. xx

Oh dear ............"

I know...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"perhaps its a good reason to reflect on how others use the site, it is aimed in a NSA manner, I can go months,years without repeat meets

I'm not gonna say there is anything wrong in this mans manner..as all I hear is one side of the story..

to be honest, I tend to avoid someone like the OP, if I feel i cant express myself how I wish on a swinging scene

bit blunt, but there u go

Can't believes I'm saying this: I agree with you!

just come out n say it!...u want yer fanny licked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

been through something very similar. I dont want to go into any details on an open forum, but if you want to pm me feel free.

its a horrible situation to be in. xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"perhaps its a good reason to reflect on how others use the site, it is aimed in a NSA manner, I can go months,years without repeat meets

I'm not gonna say there is anything wrong in this mans manner..as all I hear is one side of the story..

to be honest, I tend to avoid someone like the OP, if I feel i cant express myself how I wish on a swinging scene

bit blunt, but there u go

Can't believes I'm saying this: I agree with you!

just come out n say it!...u want yer fanny licked

Nutter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he happily let you dump him and didn't pursue you...

Regardless of your recent dallyings.... It looks to me like he's just not into you.

Time to review your expectations?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

If the economies with the truth were really lies then what has changed?

If the economies were things that you wanted to know and he didn't want to tell you then what has changed?

If you or he have changed then check that you want the same things. If nothing has changed then what makes you think it will be any different this time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If he happily let you dump him and didn't pursue you...

Regardless of your recent dallyings.... It looks to me like he's just not into you.

Time to review your expectations?"

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"This is a big thing for me cannot be honest or economical with the truth and it is over. I been burnt two times as I trusted to much.

Think with head on this one I say.

You are an amazing beautiful lady, you find a good man. I offer to take you and see how thing go, but we live to far part. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

never go back

why put yourself through all that again

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By *allen Madonna OP Woman
over a year ago

In my own little world

thank you everyone. You've been very correct in your comments which I really appreciate, and though its going to hurt like fuck all over again, but I deserve to be treated better, and therefore I'm not going to pursue his friendship on any level.

A real shame, as I think he will be forever looking and end up lonely.

So will brush myself down and carry on as normal as possilbe.

NEXT!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i wouldnt bother with a man just because i fancyed him as thats not important. but i dont think someone is realy a friend if they arent honest with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Been with a guy for almost a year, but he's very economical with the truth. It got to me recently, so I dumped him. Met him last night at a club, I still fancy him rotten, got a little more information out of him, but I don't know whether to pursue, as I feel that he's either keeping me in a box or at arms length. I'm very open minded and can't think of any circumstance that would be a deal breaker, but hate being deceived."

There is a difference between lying and hiding the truth. However people do that to protect feelings, etc. So if you think he's hiding something ask him about it. Maybe he feels too ashamed to admit to something. Yet if you ask him out right he will tell you and you can tell on the spot if its a big deal as you can pretend to be in his shoes then and think if you were him. Would you have done the same thing.

Welcome back to the forums by the way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly in an relationship is importand, be it a NSA swing meet or a full blown relationship. Let your head time your head and if something feels wrong it probably is. It will hurt more if you become more emotionally involved, do cut your losses and move on now.

If its meant to be, it will be, if its not move on & remember the good times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well done in listening...

I have the feeling you wanted a relationship....

Maybe time to.look for someone who does as well?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honestly in an relationship is important, be it a NSA swing meet or a full blown relationship. Let your head rule your heart and if something feels wrong it probably is. It will hurt more if you become more emotionally involved, so cut your losses and move on now.

If its meant to be, it will be, if its not move on & remember the good times.

Good lord my typing is getting worse, lets try this again the corrections above!'

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By *allen Madonna OP Woman
over a year ago

In my own little world

Thank you guys.

PS - nice to be back too xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there is 1000s of guys out there its vintage ferraris thats rare

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thank you guys.

PS - nice to be back too xx"

Wanted to message you a while back, but saw you had filters on

Ah well chat on here instead is still good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How hard is it to be honest

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By *allen Madonna OP Woman
over a year ago

In my own little world

I know, sounds stupid now that I think about it that I put up with so much crap, oh well thanks to everyone, I've now been to Spec Savers and taken off the rose tinted glasses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Spec Savers "

Spec Savers sound like a fraud.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never lie. Don't see the point. Probably why I have so many arguments, lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All people lie.The people who claim not to have selective memory.

However some people find it difficult to open up and tell the truth even with the most open minded of partners.

Its a sad fact that probably its men who find it most difficult to be open. I think laying it clear without ultimatums is best.....If you want us to work then we need to be open....choice is yours. then again its your choice also, empower yourself slightly but no need to be hard faced to prove a point.

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