FabSwingers.com forum: Mess & Responsibility

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

For those people who share a house or have kids of a certain age. What are you opinions on who should tidy it?

1. The person who made the mess?

2. The person who the mess belongs too?

3. Everyone who shares the house/flat, etc?

4. Or the people who use that particular room the most where there is mess?

On a slightly different subject. If dirt/hygiene wasn't the issue. Should someone be able to keep their own space in their house/flat (if only they go in there) how they like or should they keep it like the rest of the building as at the end of the day they are sharing the property?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it's a shared house then whoever makes a mess in the communal part should tidy it. so no. 1

If it's their private space then how they want it as long as it's not affecting the rest of the house (by say stinking)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it's a shared house then whoever makes a mess in the communal part should tidy it. so no. 1

If it's their private space then how they want it as long as it's not affecting the rest of the house (by say stinking) "

That's my theory, but everyone I live with say I am wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rota is the way forward when sharing a house. But all should be reasonable and tidy. As for own space, IF you are paying for it then keep it your way as long as its clean, if not then do what the person paying wants or leave. Simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just tidy your room you messy sod.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just tidy your room you messy sod. "

Example for you. Me and you share a house. I clean up after myself without any fuss at all and you don't even notice I am doing it and when you go around the house. None of my stuff is on show as its where it should be, etc. When you get round to putting your stuff away. Should I help you as we take it in turns to tidy mess or should everyone clean up after themselves?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just don't make a mess in the first place then there is none to tidy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just don't make a mess in the first place then there is none to tidy. "

That's kind of my point. I am refusing to pick up other people's mess as they should be doing it themselves as it is there mess at the end of the day, but I get told frequently that is a stupid thing to say by several people. People who know me. Know I am tidy as I don't make mess in the first place. Yet because of that I get told I am lazy as I don't tidy other people's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then I would say you are in the right.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Then I would say you are in the right. "

Yet my entire household says I am in the wrong. Basically we should share all the chores. Despite the fact I do all my own

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

our rule..

If you make a mess.. you tidy it up..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If everyone cleaned up after themselves there would be no arguments or need of a rota. This would work for say kitchen and bathroom with a rota for hoovering and cleaning the other communal rooms as long as they are kept reasonable by everyone.

Exceptions to this would be if someone cooked a meal for everyone it would be nice/polite for someone else to do the dishes.

At least your not arguing about who nicked the last of your milk from the fridge

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why is everyone in this thread speaking sense and I live with nutters

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

because your not living with some sane lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is everyone in this thread speaking sense and I live with nutters

I think all you do is point out that they are not tidying up any of your mess because you do it yourself immediately and don't leave it for others to do. Which is the considerate thing to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bottom line OP you are living with family, so I guess you don't own your own space or pay a full share of the costs. so consider it a contribution towards rent owed, and get it done. Take it as incentive to move out and find your own place where you can make the rules.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bottom line OP you are living with family, so I guess you don't own your own space or pay a full share of the costs. so consider it a contribution towards rent owed, and get it done. Take it as incentive to move out and find your own place where you can make the rules."

So I have to tidy 2 siblings rooms while they mess it on a daily basis? I do contribute money wise as well as keep my own property clean and tidy. I dont even have an ounce of dust on my stuff, never mind leave clutter anywhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Move out...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive teenage boys....if i go to work and its tidy i expect it to be tidy when i come home and they know this.

If their washing isnt in the wash then it doesnt get washed and their room is their responsibility.

I also have an 8 year old....i will ask her to pick up after her and help her tidy her room.

If we always do for our kids how are they supposed to learn to keep a tidy home...i dont ask for much from mine but wouldn't put up with always picking up after them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't want to get into your entire family dynAmics, ages, hours worked etc. will all play a part. But if you have to clean siblings rooms this can be stopped very easily by doing it thoroughly. Go through and tidy every drawer cupboard etc. they will complain and not want you going through their stuff again.

Same with parents if you neatly arrange all your mothers vibrators and underwear you will be banned from that room too.

The last sentence I wrote is your only real solution to feeling like Cinderella, move out get your own place make your own rules.

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By *ucsparkMan
over a year ago

dudley

When I lived at home from fourteen I washed ironed and put away. I cooked at least one main meal a week. Got a job had to pay one of each of the main bills every year. Mothers motto place for everything and everything in its place. Enlisted at eighteen to a much easier life.

As others have said your place, your rules. Time to move out

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