FabSwingers.com forum: Repying to messages

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why do people deem it acceptable to ignore messages and not reply to them. A simple "No Thanks" and hit send only takes a few seconds to do.

To my way of thinking not replying is just downright ignorance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm with you on that, it's common courtesy and as I was taught growing up "manners don't cost anything"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my profile and the way i run it and manage it is my decision. Nothing in the terms and conditions of this site dictates WE should reply to all messages

unless you can prove to me otherwise?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to take a look at the FAQS for the site, this is neither to be expected or rude by the rules of the site.

Remember some people get 100 messages a day, they genuinely have time to reply to every message, especially if someone clearly hasn't read their profile or respected their requirements.

Why even worry if someone doesn't reply to your message. Just move on to someone that does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always reply to message's and when we politely turn the person down we get called all the names under the sun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think in guidelines here it is perfectly acceptable not to respond to messages you can take that as a no thanks

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

But it's a waste of internet paper.

I never reply to messages. I use a system of winks and deleting messages to get across my point.

People who don't reply are just looking after our internet environment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think in guidelines here it is perfectly acceptable not to respond to messages you can take that as a no thanks "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/07/13 14:53:02]

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By *hoosy_strumpetCouple
over a year ago

W S AREA

"We always reply to message's and when we politely turn the person down we get called all the names under the sun

Totaly agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reply to all but its easy to do when you only get about one a month

Some people specialy the ladies cant get 50+ an hour so i can understand the not replying to all

If i dont get a reply i assume they are not interested and move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My favourite topic

Perhaps OP you should read from the sites FAQ:

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

Also do you answer every piece of junk/unsolicited mail that lands on your doormat or inbox with a no thank you?

Even if you did you would find the receiver of the "no thanks" sometimes will keep on pestering and before you know it you are wasting your time talking to someone you have no intention of meeting or in the care of the junk mail purchasing from.

Also it is up to individuals how they run their account, no answer is a no thank you so just move on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We always reply to message's and when we politely turn the person down we get called all the names under the sun

..... and that is well out of order too, just no need for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My favourite topic

Perhaps OP you should read from the sites FAQ:

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Also do you answer every piece of junk/unsolicited mail that lands on your doormat or inbox with a no thank you?

Also it is up to individuals how they run their account, no answer is a no thank you so just move on!

Care = case stupid autocorrect!

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Think we been through this so many times...

If I reply to someone who messaged me after reading the profile but NOT fitting any criteria why would I then reply ?..

If I do I can get rude comments or questions as to why I have said no.

So to me suffice to say if they message me I feel absolutely free to delete without reply. I dont ask to be messaged.

That is their choice mostly I dont even fit what THEY are asking for on the profile..

I find the filters set are either not working or the people are putting up a foto just to message me and then removing it from the profile immediately. That really annoys me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have a line on my profile that says 'no reply means a no thanks" , we're not totally deluged with messages but get enough for it to be too tricky to reply to all, and i dont reply to anyone who doesnt meet our preferences or quite clearly havent read our profile, they havent been polite why should i be?! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do people deem it acceptable to ignore messages and not reply to them. A simple "No Thanks" and hit send only takes a few seconds to do.

To my way of thinking not replying is just downright ignorance."

equally its downright ignorance to not read peoples profiles and to send messages when your clearly not what they want. It works both ways. Why should they reply to you when youve ignored their preferences

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I reply to all but its easy to do when you only get about one a month

Some people specialy the ladies cant get 50+ an hour so i can understand the not replying to all

If i dont get a reply i assume they are not interested and move on

Same here!

My inbox is easy to manage

I think the frustration can come when you write a nice bespoke message to an individual or couple and not doing as is so ofen done

- Cut and Paste

- One Liners

- Fancy a fuck

Only to hear nothing in return, I take the time to write and wonder why I don't get a reply.

I do understand that some people in particularly women get 100+ messages in there inbox a day and that can't be easy to split the wheat from the chaff.

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By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I initially tried to reply to every message even tho in first hour I'd over 200!!! Most of which I didn't meet their requirements or they mine or both. BUT I soon discovered a polite "thanks but no thanks" meant I was bombarded with "why?" "But..." "What if..." Type messages, further no thanks led to some pretty nasty messages n I had to use block. It just gets a bit much. So now if I'm not interested I delete

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The amount of crap messages we receive in a week is ridiculous. Why would I spend my time replying no thanks to people that haven't read our profile or just send random what you up to today messages.

Most of them get binned and we reply to the ones WE want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do people deem it acceptable to ignore messages and not reply to them. A simple "No Thanks" and hit send only takes a few seconds to do.

To my way of thinking not replying is just downright ignorance."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Each to there own but personally I feel it is ignorant to just ignore. Would you just turn your back on someone talking to you?

A simple no thanks only takes a second.

But hey if no reply probably not worth the effort

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do read profiles and only message those who's criteria I meet. I don't send random messages, I send rude messages to anyone who doesn't reply and I don't send continuous messages in the hope of getting a reply.

I accept that a lot of people get lots of messages but still think a no thanks is courteous. Perhaps Admin could give us an auto-response button that would take care of this issue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do read profiles and only message those who's criteria I meet. I don't send random messages, I send rude messages to anyone who doesn't reply and I don't send continuous messages in the hope of getting a reply.

I accept that a lot of people get lots of messages but still think a no thanks is courteous. Perhaps Admin could give us an auto-response button that would take care of this issue."
so if some 1 says no thanks

would you replay, with

why not? like most would do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

IF I got a "No Thanks" reply I would accept that as that is also common courtesy

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

"Each to there own but personally I feel it is ignorant to just ignore. Would you just turn your back on someone talking to you?

A simple no thanks only takes a second.

But hey if no reply probably not worth the effort"

In the last few minutes, i've had 3 messages from people who didn't bother to read my profile. One got a curt response, the other two were deleted and blocked without reply.

Why?

Besides the fact that i can, the messages made it pretty evident from the first few words that they didn't READ my profile. If they can't do that, then i can't be bothered to respond.

Not that i'm obliged to anyway. Same goes for all site members.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/07/13 15:22:08]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just love that argument / whine "I simply don't have time to reply to the 100 messages I have a day"

1) impossible number to have, surely (unless you do something to encourage them) - there's not THAT many people in your area interested...

2) if you don't have time to reply yet somehow do have time to read them, that says a lot about your ego (it's waaaay too big).

The argument that "I don't have time to reply to them" is pure bullshit

That behaviour - and some of the replies on here says a lot about the psychology of some individuals.

Don't worry guys - I don't want to meet a-holes: and those who can't be bothered to reply clearly are a-holes - so the a-holes select themselves out. A kind of swinging Darwinism at work here. The non-repliers have done you a favour. Jobs a good 'un I'd say.

*preparing to be flamed...*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We always respond to all mail, even if it takes time. It is a normally "thanks for your time, but you are not what we are looking for at the moment".

Does the trick to us. But we have had some nasty replies back, and some single blokes saying I have a massive dick, and your going to miss out.

Over all most people do respond, and I do not worry about it when people do not respond back. As I know people can get busy.

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By *eareenaCouple
over a year ago

Rockford

I have tried to be nice.. but now its just blocking. .. seems harsh but wow read my profile. ..

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

"Load of tripe"

Your logic is horribly flawed. i've personally seen accounts on here that reach close to 100 messages on a daily basis, even with selective filters enabled.

Again, no one is obliged to respond to any messages. at all. However you view that is totally up to you.

If you want to respond to someone who hasn't read your profile, offering you something you clearly don't want, then by all means, do so. I don't always have that patience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh here we go again with another no answer/no manners thread!

Women and couples get inundated by mails, even someone like me who lives miles from the majority and have loads of filters in place!

I'm quite specific on my profile as to what I'm looking. When someone from the other end of the UK mails me, is the opposite of what I'm looking for and has obviously not bothered reading my profile WHY should I waste my time answering? Especially as 9 times out of 10 you get the 'oh but' reply or 'your loss' or even worse 'wouldn't want to f**k you anyway'!!

I'm a size 18 blonde who lives on the west coast of Wales so I would need to be pretty stupid or desperate to message someone in Glasgow who was looking for a petite slim size 10 brunet. Get my drift?

Politeness works both ways. You may think it's rude not to answer but I happen to think it's rude not to read profiles in the first place

End of rant!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You cant win on here i used to reply with a thanks but no thanks and sometimes get abuse or begging so now i dont always bother....unless its a really well thought out message.

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By *an and wifeyCouple
over a year ago

n lincs

We have allways replied to messages untill a couple if weeks ago when a single guy gave us a few abusive reply's thinking he knows us just because he got a simple "no thanks not for us but thanks for the interest"

It even went to " we can only dream of getting the action he gets"

And we was polite in every reply.

First time in a year we have had to block some 1 for being offensive. Definitely makes us think twice to replying to single guys now

Think that is why single guys don't always get replied to and there is a few dim wits out there that ruin it for the good guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yrah I prefer no reply at all to 'no thanks your not my type'. That way I can pretend they never got my message. Better for the ego lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely a reply thanks but no thanks and block.

That way no offensive replies and nonmore hassle.

Jusy a thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP you profile says there are circumstances when you delete without a no thanks reply, therefore your original post is showing slight double standards to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do people deem it acceptable to ignore messages and not reply to them. A simple "No Thanks" and hit send only takes a few seconds to do.

To my way of thinking not replying is just downright ignorance."

Unavoidable feeling this way but it's life on FAB and it wont change as long as you have a cock in your trousers. I liken it to the person in the car that you let out at a busy junction, who then fucks off without acknowledging you. It's annoying for a few seconds but then you turn the music up, smile and move on. C'est la vie

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By *j_markCouple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Totteridge/Whetstone

"Why do people deem it acceptable to ignore messages and not reply to them. A simple "No Thanks" and hit send only takes a few seconds to do.

To my way of thinking not replying is just downright ignorance."

If you accept that no reply = not interested you'll enjoy the site more

Admin x

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