FabSwingers.com forum: negativity

By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gets my vote. Negative waves suck you dry !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Negative ppl just attract negativity into their lives, It's like they thrive on it... They never seem fulfilled or content with anything!!!

I have cut everyone from my life that is negative, whingy and constantly "woe is me" They're all gone, including family... And i feel much lighter and far happier since I did!

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By *andWCouple
over a year ago

Pontypridd

There were a few close friends on my Facebook like that, I just posted them 'the secret' and hoped for the best x

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Not keen on negativity.....there are some on Facebook I just want to shake them..

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By *lackshadow7Man
over a year ago

Toronto

I've always had a positive look on life for the most part. I try not to associate myself with overly negative people in all aspects. It just becomes soul draining.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You only have to look at some of the threads in here to see that some people thrive on negativity....it seems a whinge often generates more response than a smile

Funsuckers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i love facebook for the diversity,, sometimes i hate those people who yap on about how perfect their lives are.. lol

if people dont like or have issues with how i use my account they know how to unfriend me

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By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

The odd negative post is ok, I may be guilty of it myself but someone I know was close to suicide because she lost a sock.....a sock!!!!

Also not a fan of ugly comments either. What's the saying about when you point a finger you point 3 back at yourself??

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By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I'm going to try and only post in positive threads from now on as well

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

A now exfriend of mine was always negative but was a sort of psychic vampire and loved it when bad things happened to other people and never commented or said something to put you down if you had good news but was always gleefully in ya face about his good news. I think I have quite a balanced view and can see problems and solutions...so might air negative things but don't dwell on them. I think I'm quite a positive person overall.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

It's the bitching about others.....I have to think have you looked in the mirror

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I like to think I am a positive person .... and your right to not wish to read negative things .. as can rub off onto you there way of thinking and get you down .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

Interesting statistic for you. It takes 10 good things to wipe out a negative thing in someone's life. So if someone has faced all sort of shit recently. Think how much good has to come their way so they aren't negative anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree! I came off facebook because I was so sick of all the negative posts. It was getting me down. My ex is the same, every little thing is a disaster to him.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

How dis they work that out?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

How dis they work that out?"

A famous philosopher said it. They did tests apparently and that's what they came up with. Can't remember the name of them now as it was ages ago I found this out. It does make sense to me though as some people I know have roughly followed that pattern.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i'm positively negative me

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

It is my belief that no experience is inherently positive or negative it is simply which element you choose to focus on that give it a good or bad status. Once an experience has passed you have two choices either you learn from the event/experience(this would be the positive) or you choose to let it control your emotions (at this point your ego is in charge and no good can come of this) leading to feelings of self importance and usually a spiral of self pity ( this would be the negative). This is the most simplistic way I think I can explain this and it has served me well. Without going in to specifics this is the fundaments of my cognative processing. I am always happy to elaborate should any forumites wish for me to.

Think good thoughts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Negative ppl just attract negativity into their lives, It's like they thrive on it... They never seem fulfilled or content with anything!!!

I have cut everyone from my life that is negative, whingy and constantly "woe is me" They're all gone, including family... And i feel much lighter and far happier since I did!"

You know that's a really tough call to make. But I have done the same. As far as family members are concerned I struggle, but deep down I echo your sentiments and to keep negativity in my life was making me very very unhappy.

So here's my vote to positivity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are pessimists

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Being negative and a pessimist can be a sign of being scared of having to deal with life - a pessimist can only be pleasantly surprised after all

I am not too bothered about so called negative people - let's face it, most of us have times in our lives when we are a bit "down".

What bothers me more is dishonesty as that is more of a personality "default" .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Negative ppl just attract negativity into their lives, It's like they thrive on it... They never seem fulfilled or content with anything!!!

I have cut everyone from my life that is negative, whingy and constantly "woe is me" They're all gone, including family... And i feel much lighter and far happier since I did!

So here's my vote to positivity

Der I mean to keep negativity out of my life lol.

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"...........

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

................."

Where does it say that? The Gospel According to Mark (Zuckerberg)?

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

"
So its only on Facebook you are avoiding it?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

i stay away from negative people. we all have our moments but some thrive on it. 10 years doing cbt has helped me to change negatives to positives

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"i stay away from negative people. we all have our moments but some thrive on it. 10 years doing cbt has helped me to change negatives to positives"
Do you worry that being with "negative" people might set you back or that the negativity is kind of contagious as I have heard people say that?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"i stay away from negative people. we all have our moments but some thrive on it. 10 years doing cbt has helped me to change negatives to positives"

You must be good at putting batteries in vibrators then

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By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I remember seeing an episode of Oprah years ago. To half the audience while queuing they planted actors saying they smelt a horrible smell (there was no smell) and same to other half but a nice smell (again no smell)

The ones told about the bad smell were more likely to believe they smelt it themselves.

Intro to show Oprah revealed trick and kicked off show with "now imagine you're a child and the person you love most is telling you bad things about yourself all the time..."

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I remember seeing an episode of Oprah years ago. To half the audience while queuing they planted actors saying they smelt a horrible smell (there was no smell) and same to other half but a nice smell (again no smell)

The ones told about the bad smell were more likely to believe they smelt it themselves.

Intro to show Oprah revealed trick and kicked off show with "now imagine you're a child and the person you love most is telling you bad things about yourself all the time..."

"
Absolutely - the human mind at any age, particularly when young and vulnerable, is open to suggestions, and some more so than others.

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By *lyce and Mister MCouple
over a year ago

Falkirk

There is a thing called energy vampires, the negative people who get a kick out of draining everyone else of their positivity by being negative around them. The best defense for this is as you say hide them/ avoid their drama. I've had to do this a lot over the past year and I notice a huge difference in my attitude and moods too

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By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"...........

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

.................

Where does it say that? The Gospel According to Mark (Zuckerberg)?"

Did I Say it said it anywhere? Nope. It's just my feelings on it. Hope that's ok??

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By *ittle_brat_evie!! OP Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"It more contagious than positivity?

I have a few people on my Facebook who are always negative in every post and everytime I see them post I just want to tell them yo shut the fuck up lol

So I have decided I don't need that in my life so am hiding them (some of them are family so can't delete them really)

Apparently, according yo horizon positive people live longer so look for that silver lining people.

So its only on Facebook you are avoiding it?"

Nope but it was where the idea was sparked

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"i stay away from negative people. we all have our moments but some thrive on it. 10 years doing cbt has helped me to change negatives to positivesDo you worry that being with "negative" people might set you back or that the negativity is kind of contagious as I have heard people say that?"
not really, I try and get them to find a positive, I can't put close to things unless I've found a positive. Even with my dad dying the positive I found was at least hevwasnt leading a life as a cabbage

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"i stay away from negative people. we all have our moments but some thrive on it. 10 years doing cbt has helped me to change negatives to positivesDo you worry that being with "negative" people might set you back or that the negativity is kind of contagious as I have heard people say that?not really, I try and get them to find a positive, I can't put close to things unless I've found a positive. Even with my dad dying the positive I found was at least hevwasnt leading a life as a cabbage"
I can understand that completely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The peeps I like are those whose glasses are half full. Don't have time for negativity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is my belief that no experience is inherently positive or negative it is simply which element you choose to focus on that give it a good or bad status. Once an experience has passed you have two choices either you learn from the event/experience(this would be the positive) or you choose to let it control your emotions (at this point your ego is in charge and no good can come of this) leading to feelings of self importance and usually a spiral of self pity ( this would be the negative). This is the most simplistic way I think I can explain this and it has served me well. Without going in to specifics this is the fundaments of my cognative processing. I am always happy to elaborate should any forumites wish for me to.

Think good thoughts.

Yes! I agree with this!! I started doing it without realising. But I try to see the best in every situation, no matter how bad. Trying to teach the kids to think the same too.

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