FabSwingers.com forum: Guidance for new forum users

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

As there are so many new forum users about at the moment following the Dare To threads I though this might be a good time to run the forum guidance thread.

Post your non-malicious guidance for new forum users.

Welcome to you if you are new. Please use this space to ask that question you have about the forum rather than start a new thread.

Guidance note 1: if you have a question do a quick search (box on the left hand side) and see how many times it has been asked and when it was last asked. This will give you a sense of the sort of responses you might get and may even answer your question.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep your sense of humour and remember you have a right to voice your opinion as much as the loudest person does

No one owns the forums

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll try to remember all that while i still have my L plates

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we don't all bite, but have some respect, we're not going to fuck everyone, but you can still make good friends x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Read the forum rules. The key rules are written above the box you will be typing into.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

"we don't all bite, but have some respect, we're not going to fuck everyone, but you can still make good friends x"

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A positive attitude will evoke positive responses

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes no matter what you write it can or will be perceived in a different perspective from which it was written.

Just keep smiling, and also remember you can walk away from the forums.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Criticise the post but not the poster. Don't make it personal.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

dont get angry... walk away from the keyboard

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

When forumites are bored they tend to get sarcastic or digress and take threads in some weird directions!

Don't take this personally - they're not bored with you or trying to be nasty, just bored with whatever is going on in their real life and letting off steam in their virtual one. And sometimes this leads to some of the funniest/quirkyest threads.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Dont whinge about not getting meets after a cpl weeks on site ..and there are no cligues ....be yourself and be positive and people will respond to your posts

...remember you and us are here for fun

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Criticise the post but not the poster. Don't make it personal."

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

If you launch a grenade be prepared for some flames to scorch you too.

If you care about your thread tend it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Single guys....

Just because you are here, doesn't mean you are guaranteed a shag, so no moaning about it.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hoosy_strumpetCouple
over a year ago

W S AREA

Remember also that the forumites that you see posting on a daily basis , who seem like they own the threads , invariably end up like yesterdays newspaper ( wrapping fish and chips ) then a new lot take over

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some threads are very controversial, learn what they are (BBW, Married men/women + bareback!) and make a stance as to whether you're going to post on them or not.

You will quickly learn what each forumite is like, some are soft and cuddly, some less so!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh - if you have a problem the moderators are Jezebel and RugbydoesMFM (Ruggers for short) Admin moderates as well. They are fair in their moderation and in enforcing the rules.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't speak with your mouth full either!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rate my insecurity threads aren't cool.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Don't assume people chatting to each other on the forum means that they know each other. Most haven't met. Most just know the on-line persona of that username. Some exchange messages but will never meet. A few have met.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Putting "LOL" at the end of an insult makes everything OK

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Avatars of your penis aren't cool (unless they are for the weekly challenge).

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rate my insecurity threads aren't cool. "

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Single guys....

Just because you are here, doesn't mean you are guaranteed a shag, so no moaning about it."

And just cos someone replies in support of your post it doesn't mean they want to shag you!

Although they may want to shag you... But keep any onthread flirting light hearted. If you want to take it further take it to private messaging. And if you can't get through their filters and they haven't messaged you then step away - noone likes to see anyone begging or getting cringy in open forum.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone replies to your thread, don't assume they want to get into your undercrackers.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loads of good advice it does make me an occasional poster want to join in

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If someone replies to your thread, don't assume they want to get into your undercrackers. "

damn

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Avatars of your penis aren't cool (unless they are for the weekly challenge). "

It just reminds me I'm talking to a knob...

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read back history of the forums, they are informative, entertaining and sometimes a bit shocking..... blue waffle and special fried rice threads come to mind.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Avatars of your penis aren't cool (unless they are for the weekly challenge).

It just reminds me I'm talking to a knob... "

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Don't whatever you do, when d*unk, attempt to wipe your arse with a broken bottle.....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Please, please, please don't play out your off-line relationship with any other forum reprobate on the forum. It's not pleasant for everyone else when it goes bad.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Don't whatever you do, when d*unk, attempt to wipe your arse with a broken bottle....."

I would add, don't try that when sober either.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you a married man playing away. Whatever you do don't tell anyone in here. You'll get nailed to an upside down bruning cross.

But if you a married woman playing away tell all the men and they will be on you like flys on a freshly laied dogs egg.

Happy forum-ing

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

And if you break Funky's time machine with out of date glitter you'll be in trouble... he's already behind schedule!

Oh and never mention the 'C' word!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

When camping....never be tempted ladies to wipe your foo-foo with a leaf after taking a wee....it may well be a stinging nettle you have snatched up.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ILLY aka SirslagWoman
over a year ago

Land of the Prince Bishops

"Avatars of your penis aren't cool (unless they are for the weekly challenge).

It just reminds me I'm talking to a knob... "
so upset did so want to have my penis as an avatar bk in the box it goes ....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please, please, please don't play out your off-line relationship with any other forum reprobate on the forum. It's not pleasant for everyone else when it goes bad."

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

with the best will in the world opening posts digress and ramble, nature of the beast.

However love-ins get a bit sickly so as others have said keep them light hearted or take them to private mail, don't blog out your affair in public.

We all love red hot passion except when it burns out and becomes a cold cinder. Todays firey hot amour is tomorrows dirt and ashes.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so upset did so want to have my penis as an avatar bk in the box it goes ...."

You have an actual Penis?..

That's cool..I have one too!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Most of all have fun!!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"And if you break Funky's time machine with out of date glitter you'll be in trouble... he's already behind schedule!

Oh and never mention the 'C' word!

What? Commitment?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

As others have said, decide carefully if a thread is worth posting on - if it is a touchy subject or looks like it is heading in a bad direction then it is probably best to steer clear of it!

Also don't take everything that is said too seriously, the majority of the threads/posts are just banter and have no malicious intent behind them, though there will always be the odd one or two who post something negative, again - decide if it is worth replying to said post or just ignoring it and carrying on with the subject

It's a case of trial and error with a lot of it, you'll soon learnt the 'tricks of the trade' with this place

And if your ever unsure about anything or need advice about this place which you cannot find the answer to in the Forum Rules section then there is always plenty of Forumites or a Mod about to give you a bit of guidance

You soon recognise the regular faces - just get stuck in (responsibly!) and join in the fun

F x

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And if you break Funky's time machine with out of date glitter you'll be in trouble... he's already behind schedule!

Oh and never mention the 'C' word!

What? Commitment?

Christmas ? Oooops!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

On a more serious note.....always be true to yourself and maintain the courage of your convictions when giving an opinion....

Following the pack, even when you don't agree with their take on things deep down, WILL NOT earn you a fumble for your troubles.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ignore grammar nazis!!

Some in here use spell checks - some don't! Some miss iPhone autocorrects producing hilarious results! Some have dyslexia. Some use text speak. Some appear to have swallowed a dictionary and a thesaurus and can quote/recite all kinds of legal, historical and factual information on cue! It's not always true and anyone can hit google or wiki !!

And opinions are like arseholes - everyone has one and is entitled to air theirs!

*opinion - not arsehole!!

**and if you air your arsehole - please make sure it's freshly scrubbed and free from loo roll, dangleberries and Klingons!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

Have they all handed their bump hats in already ? It can be a good laugh, we do however have enough people from the wonderful little city of Derby and their support for their ikkle football team

Try and keep things lighthearted, we are all guilty at times of rising to things that aren't worth it at all. Opinions welcome of course, will it be worth questioning opinions who knows. You,ll no doubt see people see their arses as much as letting off some steam yourself. Count to ten, light up a joss stick and imagine tickling them naked to offer a peace branch.

We do not discriminate age, race,sexuality only after several weeks will you be pigeon holed due to demographics North/South etc. United fans exempt.

Anyways, pop off your suits, uniforms, overhauls, pour yourself a glass of wine, serve chilled and get gobbling. Xxx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Don't do love in...Like someone mentioned up there I don't really want to see ohh I love you no I love you more....

. When really they are sending a message to someone I can't stand her she thinks she is all that!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Oh god yeah... and don't air your dirty laundry in public. Skid marks are never attractive!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Realise and remember, the mods here do a great, unpaid and usually thankless job here.

Disrespect them I'll hunt you down and spit on your shoes, the day you buy new.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have strong views on a thred and dissagree with something. SHOUT as loud as you like the thred will always pay attention to if.

Its all about debate at times so get stuck right in

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember that all posts have a person behind them. Don't be a keyboard warrior.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread is great. I've giggled out loud at some of the posts

which took some explaining as I'm in work trying to look intelligent

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for the advice folks... Will try to be a good forumite.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Don't talk shit. Peaple have long memory's even if they don't say anything 1s you've been sust all your posts have lost all respet

also I think the most important thing to remember is its all just suposed to be fun. Iv had some of my biggest face hurting laffs in here

don't push my buttons I bite back

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Oh god yeah... and don't air your dirty laundry in public. Skid marks are never attractive!

thanks!!!! Iv now got tea all over my phone

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

There are forum games and then there are games. Work out which, if any you want to play.

It's not compulsory to join in any game and those that choose to play are not forming an exclusive and excluding club.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And, should someone 'feel the need' to indulge in the use of BLOCK CAPITALS, it may not mean they are SHOUTING at you....

Some of us with finely honed sensitivities despair the lack of italics and emboldening to emphasise our point...

ted.

PS are you listening Admin..????

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fear the Angel Delight!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't talk shit. Peaple have long memory's even if they don't say anything 1s you've been sust all your posts have lost all respet

also I think the most important thing to remember is its all just suposed to be fun. Iv had some of my biggest face hurting laffs in here

don't push my buttons I bite back

What button is that??

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Don't do love in...Like someone mentioned up there I don't really want to see ohh I love you no I love you more....

. When really they are sending a message to someone I can't stand her she thinks she is all that!! "

awww but babe you said you love me

sorry dident mean to go off I tride to stop myself I really did

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

[Removed by poster at 03/07/13 14:07:25]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fear the Angel Delight!"

... or even the Anal Delight, for devotees of 'I'm sorry I haven't a clue' (Monday's new episode)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we don't all bite, but have some respect, we're not going to fuck everyone, but you can still make good friends x"

please do both sound like fun

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Don't talk shit. Peaple have long memory's even if they don't say anything 1s you've been sust all your posts have lost all respet

also I think the most important thing to remember is its all just suposed to be fun. Iv had some of my biggest face hurting laffs in here

don't push my buttons I bite back

What button is that??

throws a cyberspace knock out punch......that fecking butten

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't talk shit. Peaple have long memory's even if they don't say anything 1s you've been sust all your posts have lost all respet

also I think the most important thing to remember is its all just suposed to be fun. Iv had some of my biggest face hurting laffs in here

don't push my buttons I bite back

What button is that??

throws a cyberspace knock out punch......that fecking butten

You can't do that I'm like robbies dog (eastenders) WELLHARRRD

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Pmsl

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also realise, well intended threads so go off on a tangent.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also realise, well intended threads so go off on a tangent.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Fear the Angel Delight!"

Angel Delight is not to be feared!

Angel Delight is to be smeared!

All over!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't talk shit. Peaple have long memory's even if they don't say anything 1s you've been sust all your posts have lost all respet

also I think the most important thing to remember is its all just suposed to be fun. Iv had some of my biggest face hurting laffs in here

don't push my buttons I bite back

What button is that??

throws a cyberspace knock out punch......that fecking butten

You can't do that I'm like robbies dog (eastenders) WELLHARRRD

And in the boys showers to lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

The exchange above between Bunter and Fire Blade is a good example of how a thread may have an aside and still be able to get back on track.

There won't be an emoticon for every emotion you are trying to convey. Sometimes a smiley will soften the harsh text and at other times it can make it seem that the poster is trying to absolve themselves by adding a smiley. If you start a sentence "I'm not (fill in the blank) but..." and say something offensive no amount of smiley faces will make that ok.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Don't presume becouse some 1 flerts or has a joke with you there after any thing more they mite just be having a laff.........personly I hate them kind of peaple but it takes all kinds

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/13 14:21:53]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Bring jaffa cakes and vodka and we'll be your Bessie mate!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always remember the naughty step is cold even in summer time

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bring jaffa cakes and vodka and we'll be your Bessie mate!

....... and cake! but no popcorn.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

When you see a "popping to the shops" thread be prepared to wait a very long time to get your delivery.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Single guys....

Just because you are here, doesn't mean you are guaranteed a shag, so no moaning about it.

And just cos someone replies in support of your post it doesn't mean they want to shag you!

Can this be a sticky?!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't presume becouse some 1 flerts or has a joke with you there after any thing more they mite just be having a laff.........personly I hate them kind of peaple but it takes all kinds

You ride your bike like a girl blade

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Lots of straight men have on-line bromances on the forum. It's ok as they remain straight because they don't swap cock pictures.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For those who are still scrolling up and down the forums, use the home (top) and end (bottom) buttons on the right of your keyboard to zoom start to finish.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Lots of straight men have on-line bromances on the forum. It's ok as they remain straight because they don't swap cock pictures."

right thats twice my fones had a bath in tea on this blasted thread

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"On a more serious note.....always be true to yourself and maintain the courage of your convictions when giving an opinion....

Following the pack, even when you don't agree with their take on things deep down, WILL NOT earn you a fumble for your troubles."

Agreed! Plus gents: acting like White Knights jumping to uphold the honour of the fair maidens *sniggers* please, doesn't earn you brownie points, it makes you look like a sycophantic creep.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lots of straight men have on-line bromances on the forum. It's ok as they remain straight because they don't swap cock pictures."

And they make great mmf fantasies!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Avatars of your penis aren't cool (unless they are for the weekly challenge). "
unless they have eyes and look like a sesame street character

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Lots of straight men have on-line bromances on the forum. It's ok as they remain straight because they don't swap cock pictures.

And they make great mmf fantasies! "

now now iv told you no matter how big the fantasy thats not my kinda fantasy so please stop asking now

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The suck fuck or chuck threads are not binding contracts.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The suck fuck or chuck threads are not binding contracts. "

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When camping....never be tempted ladies to wipe your foo-foo with a leaf after taking a wee....it may well be a stinging nettle you have snatched up."

I think you may have confused this thread for the Tips on surviving Glastonbury thread.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't take this place seriously in any way, shape or form!

99% of the threads are utter bolox and nonsense, written by people who shouldn't be left in charge of their own genitals, yet you'll consider handing yours over without a user manual.

Read, join in, take the piss nicely but don't be a mardy arse if someone takes the piss in return

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Almost forgot!

If you're a hot woman from the midlands, it mandatory to send me a pm begging me for hot sex

As you were

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't ever use the word bograt. Or all the ladies will call you charming.

And I'm not at all really

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you may have confused this thread for the Tips on surviving Glastonbury thread. "

Please don't mention the glasto thing again or we'll have everyone flashing there foofs again

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"When camping....never be tempted ladies to wipe your foo-foo with a leaf after taking a wee....it may well be a stinging nettle you have snatched up.

I think you may have confused this thread for the Tips on surviving Glastonbury thread. "

I survived, but I was staying in a motorhome and not a tent....

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once a month a forum king/queen is appointed. It is their job to make sure the forums are running smoothly. If it goes quiet it is the forum king/queens job to start new threads or to bump old threads.

If you are chosen as forum king/queen you will be notified via PM.

You are not allowed to disclose if you have been selected for the role.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"Don't ever use the word bograt. Or all the ladies will call you charming.

And I'm not at all really

I don't get it, according to Urban Dictionary....

Bograt

A useful word, it can be used to point out a bum on the street bathing in his/her own mess or any terribly ugly person you have unfortunately come across.

Think of the ugliness of a bog and mix it with the dirtiness of a rat. And you have something very disgusting.

Some sket that is under the age of consent and is a bit ugly.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't ever use the word bograt. Or all the ladies will call you charming.

And I'm not at all really

I don't get it, according to Urban Dictionary....

Bograt

A useful word, it can be used to point out a bum on the street bathing in his/her own mess or any terribly ugly person you have unfortunately come across.

Think of the ugliness of a bog and mix it with the dirtiness of a rat. And you have something very disgusting.

Some sket that is under the age of consent and is a bit ugly."

Yep that's just what it is. What ever you do don't bring it up in a thred. I say no more lollol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once a month a forum king/queen is appointed. It is their job to make sure the forums are running smoothly. If it goes quiet it is the forum king/queens job to start new threads or to bump old threads.

If you are chosen as forum king/queen you will be notified via PM.

You are not allowed to disclose if you have been selected for the role. "

.... Court jester however is often obvious to all.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Dont post image links, even on REPUTABLE sites like, Flickr, imgur etc.

You end up with a timeout

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"And that's what we love about the forum its good for debate!!!

And you can't beat a mass debate

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't mean to be rude but I'm not sure this is the thread for people to moan having been banned, although I suppose it serves as a warning that the forums are moderated.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't mean to be rude but I'm not sure this is the thread for people to moan having been banned, although I suppose it serves as a warning that the forums are moderated."

Another good one hijacked

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't mean to be rude but I'm not sure this is the thread for people to moan having been banned, although I suppose it serves as a warning that the forums are moderated."

those that want to moan about bans moan to the people that can deal with it by clicking the contact link at the bottom of the page

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If someone replies to your thread, don't assume they want to get into your undercrackers. "

Welcome to the new people. Be yourself and have fun.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Don't mean to be rude but I'm not sure this is the thread for people to moan having been banned, although I suppose it serves as a warning that the forums are moderated.

those that want to moan about bans moan to the people that can deal with it by clicking the contact link at the bottom of the page"

Another good piece of guidance for new forum users. There is a contact link at the bottom of the page. There is also a FAQ section to the site.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be happy and hope you find lots of fun

Ruby

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use tact, don't just gob off. If you don't agree with a formite, then just agree to disagree if neither opinions are the same. Remember as much as we are entitled to our own opinions, they will not always be the same as others!

Have a sense of humour as most stuff put on here is tongue n cheek.

If someone really upsets you, and you feel your being victimised, don't mouth of, just click and report and let the admins sort it out FAIRLY!

Have fun and welcome

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just popping in to welcome all forum uses, welcome to all the new uses, and hi to all regular uses

Hope everyone is well xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Users# lol bloody phone! Lol

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

"And you can't beat a mass debate"
. Haha, see what he did there ?

Saving on webspace and site costing, I know it's only minimal but it all adds up, when replying and quoting, delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention.

It really helps us that are scrolling on the phones x

Who's round is it anyway ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

"Don't mean to be rude but I'm not sure this is the thread for people to moan having been banned, although I suppose it serves as a warning that the forums are moderated."

Would be better not having to demonstrate that particular point but yes its not the place for moaning about bans so posts have gone and if youve quoted them they have gone too sorry.

But loads of useful posts

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention."

I totally agree. The quoting system is a weird here and it makes me want to bang my face on the desk when I see 30 lines of nested quotes with a 3 word reply.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you do post your opinion be aware it may offend others and earn you a place on their block list

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Use tact, don't just gob off. If you don't agree with a formite, then just agree to disagree if neither opinions are the same. Remember as much as we are entitled to our own opinions, they will not always be the same as others!

Have a sense of humour as most stuff put on here is tongue n cheek.

If someone really upsets you, and you feel your being victimised, don't mouth of, just click and report and let the admins sort it out FAIRLY!

Have fun and welcome

excellent advice an I only wish I took it more often how ever everys different an other parts of your life change the way you deal with things so adding to noangels advise id also add if your having 1 of those days an the pashence is a little thin this isn't the best place to be at that time

id also like to say with regards to my earlyer post about bans it was far from ment as moaning about my own bans is was ment as dont bother moaning about em as in you did it deal with it

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

If you do get banned....

Don't talk about the ban on the forums when you are able to post again...... That can get you another ban

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention.

I totally agree. The quoting system is a weird here and it makes me want to bang my face on the desk when I see 30 lines of nested quotes with a 3 word reply."

I agree an I no I do it myself I just dont know how to only put the bit I want HELP see nobody knows it all so ask

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/07/13 16:42:50]

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we don't all bite, but have some respect, we're not going to fuck everyone, but you can still make good friends x"

Bollocks, was hoping xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you have a negative username, try not to live up to it too much.

Oh I def don't live up to my name , well not often anyway

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

Read, join in, take the piss nicely but don't be a mardy arse if someone takes the piss in return

That's one of the best pieces of advice I've seen

Remember lots of us old timers use the Green Arrow next to names to see what folk previously posted on...those who change opinions more often than they change underwear are soon noticed ("I love BBW, they're real women" on one thread..."Some big fat ugly munters on this site" on another - been turned down by a curvy lady by any chance???)

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If at any point you attempt to invoke the right of parlay and your greeted with the responce....

“I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request”.

It just means "no".

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"If at any point you attempt to invoke the right of parlay and your greeted with the responce....

“I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request”.

It just means "no".

just becouse I buzz off soxy posts an we bounce off each other it doesn't mean we fancy each other its called having a laff

sorry soxy but its time I let you down gently

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention.

I totally agree. The quoting system is a weird here and it makes me want to bang my face on the desk when I see 30 lines of nested quotes with a 3 word reply.

I agree an I no I do it myself I just dont know how to only put the bit I want HELP see nobody knows it all so ask

I have kept this complete so that you know what I am talking about.

When you click reply and quote you will see a[ quote ] at the beginning and end. Delete all the parts in the middle you don't want to repeat but keep the two [ quote ] boxes.

If you are not quoting then just reply in forum or add a new post.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If at any point you attempt to invoke the right of parlay and your greeted with the responce....

“I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request”.

It just means "no".

just becouse I buzz off soxy posts an we bounce off each other it doesn't mean we fancy each other its called having a laff

sorry soxy but its time I let you down gently

Thats not gentle, thats just fucking mean, id do soxy xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Send all hamburger shot to me

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"."

and try not to "reply privately" unless asked

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send all hamburger shot to me

I'm lost , what you on about

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

At least try an read peaples profile ok some go into a rant an I guess im a little guilty of that myself but do try an keep reading you might find theres reasen an also some good advice you might even find out if you take the time to bother finding out some of the rantyest sounding profiles belong to some really quite nice peaple.....not mine of course im a twat

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Send all hamburger shot to me

Even the vegetarian ones?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention.

I totally agree. The quoting system is a weird here and it makes me want to bang my face on the desk when I see 30 lines of nested quotes with a 3 word reply.

I agree an I no I do it myself I just dont know how to only put the bit I want HELP see nobody knows every thing so ask

If you are not quoting then just reply in forum or add a new post."

like that ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Yes ffs I did it thanks likerty its been doing my box it

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If at any point you attempt to invoke the right of parlay and your greeted with the responce....

“I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request”.

It just means "no".

just becouse I buzz off soxy posts an we bounce off each other it doesn't mean we fancy each other its called having a laff

sorry soxy but its time I let you down gently

Ohhhh Blade,,,,,,,,there you go again... you and your devilish attempts at reverse psychology flirting,,,,,,

sheeeesh really dude, you should just embrace these feeling you have,,,,,,

I don’t mind if your lusting after me, after-all its a perfectly natural response your encountering.... and its not like I can help being this charming and gorgeous .....

And I promise to help you find a Tutu in your size that matches the colour your bike leathers,

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"Send all hamburger shot to me

I'm lost , what you on about

When a lady takes a picture of her fajiner, it looks a bit like a hamburger standing on end.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"Send all hamburger shot to me

Even the vegetarian ones?"

I like those to. Some even taste better.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send all hamburger shot to me

I'm lost , what you on about

When a lady takes a picture of her fajiner, it looks a bit like a hamburger standing on end."

Refuses the urge to stand over a mirror to see if that's true

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a veggie,,,,

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"If at any point you attempt to invoke the right of parlay and your greeted with the responce....

“I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request”.

It just means "no".

just becouse I buzz off soxy posts an we bounce off each other it doesn't mean we fancy each other its called having a laff

sorry soxy but its time I let you down gently

Ohhhh Blade,,,,,,,,there you go again... you and your devilish attempts at reverse psychology flirting,,,,,,

sheeeesh really dude, you should just embrace these feeling you have,,,,,,

I don’t mind if your lusting after me, after-all its a perfectly natural response your encountering.... and its not like I can help being this charming and gorgeous .....

And I promise to help you find a Tutu in your size that matches the colour your bike leathers,

iv told you before they chief under my leathers an its so uncool when I have to pick them out the crack of my arse

ok I guess my little scams up send usva cock pic ya sexy little fucker you......swoooooon

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Google 'Godwins Law'- if you do this then you've automatically lost any argument to were involved in

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a veggie,,,,

Thats ok cos a thread I saw in wales was licking the lettice xx. Loves ya sox xx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Google 'Godwins Law'- if you do this then you've automatically lost any argument to were involved in

awww ffs im gona have to go do it arnt I grrrr

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Saving on webspace and site costing, I know it's only minimal but it all adds up, when replying and quoting, delete the bulk of the message bar the actual part you wish to bring to attention.

It really helps us that are scrolling on the phones x"

Would like to point out, deleting great swathes of post when you're using some phones is a major P.I.T.A. so basically I can't be arsed sometimes unless i really need to streamline it to make a point

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Google 'Godwins Law'- if you do this then you've automatically lost any argument to were involved in

awww ffs im gona have to go do it arnt I grrrr

Go on Adolf- fetch!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Send all hamburger shot to me

FFS do women say cocks look like sausag......oh!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a veggie,,,,

Thats ok cos a thread I saw in wales was licking the lettice xx. Loves ya sox xx"

Oo'er,,,,, lettuce licking....phwarrrr now that really does sounds quite erotic....I'm in......

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How very true,seen it countless times on here,and I think get a fooking grip its a forum!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have a sense of humour as most stuff put on here is tongue n cheek.

If someone really upsets you, and you feel your being victimised, don't mouth of, just click and report and let the admins sort it out FAIRLY!

Have fun and welcome

id also like to say with regards to my earlyer post about bans it was far from ment as moaning about my own bans is was ment as dont bother moaning about em as in you did it deal with it"

I agree, ppls replies demend on their mood. We are all guilty of reading something the way we feel, so if we aare happy, something can read lighthearted but if we are pissed off and moody then we will read it in a totally opposite light!

Nothing can be gained from being bitchy and it says more about a person than they realise.

Yes we all differ as individuals, so form many different opinions on subjects, but that does not make our opinion the right one. So have tact, be polite and accept that we all see the world with different eyes!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm a veggie,,,,

Thats ok cos a thread I saw in wales was licking the lettice xx. Loves ya sox xx

Oo'er,,,,, lettuce licking....phwarrrr now that really does sounds quite erotic....I'm in......

Cool, when ?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"Send all hamburger shot to me

FFS do women say cocks look like sausag......oh!

With your hamburger and my sausage I feel a BBQ coming on babe xxx

^^^^ Best chat up line I have ever made. Right there live!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

This thread is drawing to a close. The other bit of guidance is that they close automatically at 175 posts. Some sneaky people know how to overcome this obstacle and continue to post long after a thread has closed. Sometimes hours later. The secret to this ability to defy the laws of the Fab Forum is only to be gained by joining in. It's a rite of passage.

I hope this thread has been of use to some of you, even if you didn't post. Have a Fabswingers time on here and I look forward to getting to know you, cyberspace virtually.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Send all hamburger shot to me

FFS do women say cocks look like sausag......oh!

With your hamburger and my sausage I feel a BBQ coming on babe xxx

^^^^ Best chat up line I have ever made. Right there live!"

Are you giving yourself an internet for it?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you do get banned....

Don't talk about the ban on the forums when you are able to post again...... That can get you another ban

Why have I not been banned? I'm feeling left out

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you do get banned....

Don't talk about the ban on the forums when you are able to post again...... That can get you another ban

Why have I not been banned? I'm feeling left out

You're obviously not trying hard enough with your insults

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Dont post image links, even on REPUTABLE sites like, Flickr, imgur etc.

You end up with a timeout

So how come this thread ended up with loads of people whinging about bans or mods....?

First rule of moaning about bans or mods...don't...as the rules ask.

If you don't like the rules that are set...use the CONTACT button to send your feedback or you may fall foul of another ban.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Dont post image links, even on REPUTABLE sites like, Flickr, imgur etc.

You end up with a timeout

So how come this thread ended up with loads of people whinging about bans or mods....?

First rule of moaning about bans or mods...don't...as the rules ask.

If you don't like the rules that are set...use the CONTACT button to send your feedback or you may fall foul of another ban."

Are you moaning?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

Don't become obsessed with your cock. You will probably turn into one.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Don't start a thread up about BBW's. it highlights I am going to eat cake syndrome

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't start a thread up about BBW's. it highlights I am going to eat cake syndrome

Cake mmmmm I just had a French pear and almond tart and I have now got the giggles after writing that

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

So how come this thread ended up with loads of people whinging about bans or mods....?

Hey! I wasn't moaning

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

If there is cake it should be offered to everyone on the forum. I think that's in the actual founding documents of the site.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

mmmm cake ... nice people .... fun ... banter ... virtual hugs .... promises of real hugs .... virtual parties ... promises of real parties ... help .. support .... shoulders to cry on .... celebrations .... thats what fab forums should be and to a large extent are about xxxx

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did someone mention cake!!!!

Where is it?.....what sort is it?..... how many piece’s are there?

I shout dibs,,,......

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most new foromites should be aware that there is a north south divide. This mostly comes to the surface during the great chip shop / chippy /fishy debates. It's also advisable not to presume that everyone would like gravy on their chips.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Don't assume when someone replies to you on the forum it means they want you to message them, especially if you think you don't have to fit their meet criteria. It's a bit creepy.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most new foromites should be aware that there is a north south divide. This mostly comes to the surface during the great chip shop / chippy /fishy debates. It's also advisable not to presume that everyone would like gravy on their chips. "

hahahaha

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ohhhh myyyyy Lordy

I promise that I will do my best to do my duty to forum

To serve the queen, the Lickety splits

And to keep the cheekychops law

All of course in jest... Great place to be... Great gang of people!

Highly, recommended, love it made lots of friends..

Take a pew enjoy the ride... One problem you will enter but you will most definitely never leave!

From a relatively newbie

stick with they are worth it well most anyways

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

That's a very good point. New forum users should read all threads about fish and chips and north/south divide.

I have a feeling all this good advice has not been read though.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Following on from what I said earlier...

...also don't type with your mouth full.

It's like..

...just don't! Alright!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a very good point. New forum users should read all threads about fish and chips and north/south divide.

I have a feeling all this good advice has not been read though.

Perhaps we should also inform new forumites that not everyone dahn sahf talks like Chaz and Dave and says thing like.....

Cor blimey it's flipp'in hot dahn 'ere today.

But I bet it's still colder than a frozen pizza up norf.

Gurtcha !!!!

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a very good point. New forum users should read all threads about fish and chips and north/south divide.

I have a feeling all this good advice has not been read though.

Perhaps we should also inform new forumites that not everyone dahn sahf talks like Chaz and Dave and says thing like.....

Cor blimey it's flipp'in hot dahn 'ere today.

But I bet it's still colder than a frozen pizza up norf.

Gurtcha !!!!

That's how I imagine lickety speaks.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

That's a very good point. New forum users should read all threads about fish and chips and north/south divide.

I have a feeling all this good advice has not been read though.

Perhaps we should also inform new forumites that not everyone dahn sahf talks like Chaz and Dave and says thing like.....

Cor blimey it's flipp'in hot dahn 'ere today.

But I bet it's still colder than a frozen pizza up norf.

Gurtcha !!!!

That's how I imagine lickety speaks. "

I've met her, she sounds exactly like that

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Perhaps we should also inform new forumites that not everyone dahn sahf talks like Chaz and Dave and says thing like.....

Cor blimey it's flipp'in hot dahn 'ere today.

But I bet it's still colder than a frozen pizza up norf.

Gurtcha !!!!

That's how I imagine lickety speaks.

I've met her, she sounds exactly like that

I was trying to impress you with your posh Arse End accent.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

New men, this one is really important - have patience. A couple of weeks on the site is nothing. Threads about no one meeting you can be viewed by searching and you will see that there was someone just like you saying the same just the other day/week/month.

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Following on from what I said earlier...

...also don't type with your mouth full.

It's like..

...just don't! Alright!!"

Probably best to not type with your mouth at all....have you ever considered using your fingers for typing?

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooooo, thread closed- now I can try out my theory on how to post more after its closed......

"Hello! Hello! IS THIS THING ON?....."

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately