FabSwingers.com forum: This is not funny....I can't

By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would help but it's rude to talk with my mouth full.

*wipes cheese from his chops*

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

microwave ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

Oh froggydisneyfawn - NOW think carefully from last night.

You finished your cheese n staggered to kitchen carrying said cheeseboard and you put it down on the?????????

Come on its not that difficult

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"microwave ? "

OMG....let me check

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Oh froggydisneyfawn - NOW think carefully from last night.

You finished your cheese n staggered to kitchen carrying said cheeseboard and you put it down on the?????????

Come on its not that difficult

But is Mister....its me mind! its gone walkies

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By *imtomyMan
over a year ago

manchester

Was the wine the culprit that made you forget??

Try and find the wine glass or bottle then you might find the board and knife.lol

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Was the wine the culprit that made you forget??

Try and find the wine glass or bottle then you might find the board and knife.lol

Hehehehe! For once I was NOT d*unk...I even checked the Garden Shed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bambi, look down the back of the sofa is usually the advice you get on here ......... but beware, sofa's eat people!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Oh froggydisneyfawn - NOW think carefully from last night.

You finished your cheese n staggered to kitchen carrying said cheeseboard and you put it down on the?????????

Come on its not that difficult

But is Mister....its me mind! its gone walkies

Hold on are we looking for the cheeseboard or your mind???? cos they could be in different places!!!

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Have you looked in the last place you looked yet? I find loads of shit there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Oh froggydisneyfawn - NOW think carefully from last night.

You finished your cheese n staggered to kitchen carrying said cheeseboard and you put it down on the?????????

Come on its not that difficult

But is Mister....its me mind! its gone walkies

Hold on are we looking for the cheeseboard or your mind???? cos they could be in different places!!!

They could be the same thing

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By *imtomyMan
over a year ago

manchester

"Was the wine the culprit that made you forget??

Try and find the wine glass or bottle then you might find the board and knife.lol

Hehehehe! For once I was NOT d*unk...I even checked the Garden Shed

"
hmm, you might have to search for a fab member with the name of Sherlock Holmes to come and find it!!

Just give me five minutes while I create another profile.lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fridge? I find I've put all sorts in there sometimes

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Oh froggydisneyfawn - NOW think carefully from last night.

You finished your cheese n staggered to kitchen carrying said cheeseboard and you put it down on the?????????

Come on its not that difficult

But is Mister....its me mind! its gone walkies

Hold on are we looking for the cheeseboard or your mind???? cos they could be in different places!!!

Ooooooh Minxie, you're onto something...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My money's on - it's hiding in the fridge

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Have you looked in the last place you looked yet? I find loads of shit there.

Pfft...what do you take me for?

I never retrave my steps...far too dangerous!

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"I would help but it's rude to talk with my mouth full.

*wipes cheese from his chops*"

I'm watching you mister!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

Would you like me to check my cupboards. .?

(flutters eyelashes...)

ted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe get more then one so if you do this again ... you don't have to worry , lol

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

similar thing happened to me once .. hunted high and low searching for a frying pan I had used the previous night .. turned out me fella had chucked it out !!

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Would you like me to check my cupboards. .?

(flutters eyelashes...)

ted

You!! you took it??? own up or else, I'll send a whole lot of

over to your house x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Would you like me to check my cupboards. .?

(flutters eyelashes...)

ted

You!! you took it??? own up or else, I'll send a whole lot of

over to your house x"

Promises, promises...

No, but I will own up to keeping an odd looking sausage for longer than was probably good for it...

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Would you like me to check my cupboards. .?

(flutters eyelashes...)

ted

You!! you took it??? own up or else, I'll send a whole lot of

over to your house x

Promises, promises...

No, but I will own up to keeping an odd looking sausage for longer than was probably good for it...

Back to my cheeseboard Mister....you're not distracting me with your odd looking sausage!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"own up or else, I'll send a whole lot of

over to your house x"

PS has Funky got his own emoticon now then??????

Flippin eck!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

Please help me locate it

(be nice

)

Would you like me to check my cupboards. .?

(flutters eyelashes...)

ted

You!! you took it??? own up or else, I'll send a whole lot of

over to your house x

Promises, promises...

No, but I will own up to keeping an odd looking sausage for longer than was probably good for it...

Back to my cheeseboard Mister....you're not distracting me with your odd looking sausage!

Ahem, could it be being utilised as a doorp-stop somewhere around 'Chez Bambi'..????

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By *imtomyMan
over a year ago

manchester

My bets are that you put a magazine or lap top down on top of it.

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

Its not under the bed

Its not in the fridge

Its not in the freezer

Its not in the shed, nor the garage, nor inside the piano....

C'mon guys...think, please help. I need ideas....I am begging, on my knees x

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By *imtomyMan
over a year ago

manchester

Oh, anyone help I've lost my bread board..

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"My bets are that you put a magazine or lap top down on top of it.

Aha! thats a good idea...let me check! Back in a tick x

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

It'll be the Borrowers. They still have two of my side plates and some cutlery.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bread bin? If u had a baguette? Perhaps u put it in there? Or the bin?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its not under the bed

Its not in the fridge

Its not in the freezer

Its not in the shed, nor the garage, nor inside the piano....

C'mon guys...think, please help. I need ideas....I am begging, on my knees x"

Er.... while ya down there.....

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"It'll be the Borrowers. They still have two of my side plates and some cutlery."

You know....I was just having a similar thought! Its not impossible!

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Its not under the bed

Its not in the fridge

Its not in the freezer

Its not in the shed, nor the garage, nor inside the piano....

C'mon guys...think, please help. I need ideas....I am begging, on my knees x

Er.... while ya down there.....

You know why big boy!!! Behave yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the bed

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

under the sofa?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its not under the bed

Its not in the fridge

Its not in the freezer

Its not in the shed, nor the garage, nor inside the piano....

C'mon guys...think, please help. I need ideas....I am begging, on my knees x

Er.... while ya down there.....

You know why big boy!!! Behave yourself

ooooh you just made an old man very happy..

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"In the bed

'crumbs...thats an idea'! dont move...

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"under the sofa?

Already checked!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In the bed

'crumbs...thats an idea'! dont move..."

If not, is it in my bed?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

Bin?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"under the sofa?

Already checked!"

it's down the back of it I tell you down the back of it .........

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"It'll be the Borrowers. They still have two of my side plates and some cutlery.

You know....I was just having a similar thought! Its not impossible!

If you do find it can you see if they have left my side plates and cutlery, please?

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

Is there going to be a prize?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester."

... and a group of Dorrrrrrset 'old guys' all gathered around it at the local pub wondering if it's some magical implement which fell to earth....

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"under the sofa?

Already checked!

it's down the back of it I tell you down the back of it .........

I'd never dare put cheese down your back Minxie!! Who do you take me for?

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester.

... and a group of Dorrrrrrset 'old guys' all gathered around it at the local pub wondering if it's some magical implement which fell to earth....

PMSL xxxxxxxx will you be serious?

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester.

... and a group of Dorrrrrrset 'old guys' all gathered around it at the local pub wondering if it's some magical implement which fell to earth....

No, they'd have a truckle of Dorset White and some Dorset Knobs to place upon it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"under the sofa?

Already checked!

it's down the back of it I tell you down the back of it .........

I'd never dare put cheese down your back Minxie!! Who do you take me for?

Oooh I dunno... I reckon Minxie would be quite partial to a bit of melted Rebluchon cascading over her....

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"...find my cheese board. I have opened all the cupboards in the house and it is nowhere to be found. I had some of the brie and blue cheese on toasted baguette last night ffs!!

A French person without cheese is like a French kiss without tongue...it does not bear thingking about...!

are you sure you didnt put it under the grill when toasting the baguette

could be debris

Please help me locate it

(be nice

check under the grill to see if you left it in when you toasted your baguette

might only be debrie left though

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Is there going to be a prize?"

Yes yes!! *jumps up and down in excitement*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester.

... and a group of Dorrrrrrset 'old guys' all gathered around it at the local pub wondering if it's some magical implement which fell to earth....

No, they'd have a truckle of Dorset White and some Dorset Knobs to place upon it."

Yes, well there ain't a lot else to do down there apart from put your Dorset Knobs together, is there....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oven?

Behind the taps cos U washed it?

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

throw all the mens crusty underwear that you keep as trophys out into the garden and then your nose wont be mislead and it might lead you to your cheeseboard

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Have you been on a picnic lately? It could be languishing in a field 'somewhere in Derbyshire... or even deepest, darkest Dorrrrr-settttt (moy luvverrrrr! As they say down ther...)

I have vision of FrenchBambi on her bike with a cheeseboard strapped to her back. It will have come off going around the roundabout at Dorchester.

... and a group of Dorrrrrrset 'old guys' all gathered around it at the local pub wondering if it's some magical implement which fell to earth....

No, they'd have a truckle of Dorset White and some Dorset Knobs to place upon it.

Yes, well there ain't a lot else to do down there apart from put your Dorset Knobs together, is there....

Oi! There me to do down there so...

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

I thought it said chess board. And there was me thinking I'd stumbled across some intellectual passtime thread

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"throw all the mens crusty underwear that you keep as trophys out into the garden and then your nose wont be mislead and it might lead you to your cheeseboard

Ewwww Sam! Really?

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"throw all the mens crusty underwear that you keep as trophys out into the garden and then your nose wont be mislead and it might lead you to your cheeseboard

Ewwww Sam! Really?

no not really a moment of madness grabbed me and then i was timed out on deleting it ! x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From Officer Crabtree: 'ave you licked beheend ze painting of ze Fallen Midoooner with the Big Bibbies by Von Klimp'???????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"throw all the mens crusty underwear that you keep as trophys out into the garden and then your nose wont be mislead and it might lead you to your cheeseboard

Ewwww Sam! Really?

no not really a moment of madness grabbed me and then i was timed out on deleting it ! x"

a likely story...

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"throw all the mens crusty underwear that you keep as trophys out into the garden and then your nose wont be mislead and it might lead you to your cheeseboard

Ewwww Sam! Really?

no not really a moment of madness grabbed me and then i was timed out on deleting it ! x"

You had me worried there for a moment!

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Did you leave it in the dishwasher, ,, mine eats tea spoons,, I think its in cahoots with the washing machine it collects my socks,,,

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By *renchbambi x OP Woman
over a year ago

Need to know basis

"Did you leave it in the dishwasher, ,, mine eats tea spoons,, I think its in cahoots with the washing machine it collects my socks,,,

I Founf it! Panic over!!! Dishwasher yayayayayaya!! Must have eaten all the cheese xx

Merci a tous for your help! You have been brilliant!

Steve..a bj for you my love xx

Off to Chams for MMMMF

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By *aula.ceciliaWoman
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Yay!!!! didnt happen to find my pink Fuji camera next to it did you??? I cant find it anywhere!!!!

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

I'll let gary kasperov know and save him a journey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did you end up using it as a paddle ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did you leave it in the dishwasher, ,, mine eats tea spoons,, I think its in cahoots with the washing machine it collects my socks,,,

I Founf it! Panic over!!! Dishwasher yayayayayaya!! Must have eaten all the cheese xx

Merci a tous for your help! You have been brilliant!

Steve..a bj for you my love xx

Off to Chams for MMMMF

For gawds sake froggydisneyfawn - surely ya bothered to look in the dishwasher BEFORE u got us lot hunting high/low for it! Pft! Ya so careless wiv things

lol

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