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Suggest a law

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By *hyllyphylly OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

When I become Dark Overlord of the UK, I need some new laws.

Any suggestions?

My first one would be.... It will be legal to punch those "charity fundraisers", (not to be confused with proper ones), full on in the face if they keep asking you every time you walk past them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

old single smelly as fuck people have to be washed once a week min

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The chill the F out law!

"My first one would be.... It will be legal to punch those "charity fundraisers", (not to be confused with proper ones), full on in the face if they keep asking you every time you walk past them."

they're trying to do something good in the world and have to put up with a thousand people ignoring them for doing so. They're normally chosen as the far too happy and smiley sort too! Punch them for that yeah but not for trying to do something for those worse off than yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would like a cinema law that if you create any noise that involves bodily functions, food wrappers or technology your publically flogged outside.

With a bylaw of young people under 18 years of age not permitted in cinemas after 6pm.

And finally a bylaw stating that if a cinema is almost empty you must sit as far away from the others in the cinema already seated. NOT ON THEIR FECKIN LAPS!!

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By *irtydanMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

the street beggers would have to go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one under the age of twenty one should be allowed to own a dog. When you do want a dog there should be a home check first to see if your home is suitable for the dog size you want. All dogs then should have a sample on DNA taken so that any dog shit found on the pavement would tell you where that dog lives and appropriate action can be taken.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All knickers banned lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Children can be seen but not heard

(I'm quite happy to not have to see them to)

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh


"All knickers banned lol"

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Four day week!

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

It will henceforth be illegal to view and respond to messages in the fora without a sense of humour and unless yer banter is up to it! Damn, this could be my last post (no bugles please)

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh


"Four day week!"

Three surely, I want the weekend to be longer than the week!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That I should be worshipped by all everyday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

make it illegal for women over a certain size to wear leggings

wolf howling t shirts to be a crime worthy of 5 years

increase the drinking age to 21

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often dream about this.

One law I would like to introduce is for political parties to be legally bound to their party manifestos, so they can be prosecuted should they not adhere to the very policies that helped them get into power.

That is kind of moot though, if you are already in charge.

The first thing I would personally do it re-nationalise the railways and possibly take back anything that essential to living and make it state run (water, energy etc).

Another thing I would do (this may be controversial) is to phone America and tell them I want Bush in my office first thing in the morning. He and Blair would then be put on trial for war crimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Damn, my post was too serious...

Too much coffee again maybe.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"No one under the age of twenty one should be allowed to own a dog. When you do want a dog there should be a home check first to see if your home is suitable for the dog size you want. All dogs then should have a sample on DNA taken so that any dog shit found on the pavement would tell you where that dog lives and appropriate action can be taken. "

I would extend that to cats as well. Far too many roaming around attacking wild birds and shitting in my garden.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

Oh, and under 5's banned from any aeroplane that I am on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ban all wank-heads

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By *aisy100Woman
over a year ago

wakefield


"Oh, and under 5's banned from any aeroplane that I am on. "

il come on your aeroplane

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All country parks and national trust lantern must set aside at least 3% of its square mass to be used for dogging

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By *renchbambi xWoman
over a year ago

Need to know basis


"Ban all wank-heads "

and fucktards and twunts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ban all wank-heads

and fucktards and twunts "

All of them ..... mind you Id have no one to moan about if it happened

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

There should be law about snotty nosed kids coming up to me and pulling at my clothes

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By *inky BunnyMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

The Dark Overlord must be brought to justice & tried for his many crimes (inc. punching people full in the face) and a New Era of Light, Peace, Love & Power through & in all people shall reign

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone spitting in public must be made to lick it up off the floor.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"Oh, and under 5's banned from any aeroplane that I am on.

il come on your aeroplane "

After looking at your pic I am now googleing "private jet rental"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would like a cinema law that if you create any noise that involves bodily functions, food wrappers or technology your publically flogged outside.

With a bylaw of young people under 18 years of age not permitted in cinemas after 6pm.

And finally a bylaw stating that if a cinema is almost empty you must sit as far away from the others in the cinema already seated. NOT ON THEIR FECKIN LAPS!! "

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"Four day week!

Three surely, I want the weekend to be longer than the week!"

I was trying not to push my luck and Fridays usually aren't bad. I could be persuaded to rip Tuesdays right out of the week though! I hate Tuesdays!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No one under the age of twenty one should be allowed to own a dog. When you do want a dog there should be a home check first to see if your home is suitable for the dog size you want. All dogs then should have a sample on DNA taken so that any dog shit found on the pavement would tell you where that dog lives and appropriate action can be taken.

I would extend that to cats as well. Far too many roaming around attacking wild birds and shitting in my garden."

We have a neighbour with 4 cats who all think our garden is their property.!!!

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By *ickloverMan
over a year ago

Devizes

All MPs will be on a pay by performance contract, if we think they're doing fuck all that's what they should get paid.

Capital punishment brought back and the cane in schools,

All proven rapists should be hung by the bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Open up at least 50% of beaches and parkland for nude sunbathing and sexual activities ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ban all wank-heads "

I'm in trouble then

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By *heScotandthegirlCouple
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh


"Four day week!

Three surely, I want the weekend to be longer than the week!

I was trying not to push my luck and Fridays usually aren't bad. I could be persuaded to rip Tuesdays right out of the week though! I hate Tuesdays! "

Totally agree on Tuesdays, Mondays are usually ok funnily enough but disagree on Fridays, supposed to be the easiest day of the week and for me always turn out to be the worst, oh and i always push my luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I often dream about this.

One law I would like to introduce is for political parties to be legally bound to their party manifestos, so they can be prosecuted should they not adhere to the very policies that helped them get into power.

That is kind of moot though, if you are already in charge.

The first thing I would personally do it re-nationalise the railways and possibly take back anything that essential to living and make it state run (water, energy etc).

Another thing I would do (this may be controversial) is to phone America and tell them I want Bush in my office first thing in the morning. He and Blair would then be put on trial for war crimes."

Would love some 'bush' in my office!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would love some 'bush' in my office! "

No you mention it, me too!

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By *hyllyphylly OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"The Dark Overlord must be brought to justice & tried for his many crimes (inc. punching people full in the face) and a New Era of Light, Peace, Love & Power through & in all people shall reign "

I agree... oh hang on... DEATH TO ALL UNBELIEVERS

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By *inky BunnyMan
over a year ago

Cardiff


"The Dark Overlord must be brought to justice & tried for his many crimes (inc. punching people full in the face) and a New Era of Light, Peace, Love & Power through & in all people shall reign

I agree... oh hang on... DEATH TO ALL UNBELIEVERS"

Tut tut there you go again : no compassion, no wisdom. Surely now your time is short ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone spitting in public must be made to lick it up off the floor."

Oooooooo HELL YES. I will vote for you if you ever run for over lord !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That all mps get the minimum wage for 3yrs and all other sources of income stopped until they realise what life in reak world is like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Check out Mark Thomas : The Peoples Manifesto.

Quite an amusing little read.


"That all mps get the minimum wage for 3yrs and all other sources of income stopped until they realise what life in reak world is like."

There is an alternative.

As MPs recieve vast salaries (AFTER their term as MPs) from actually being an MP, their wages should be a loan they have to pay back; much like a student loan.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/06/13 17:29:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

5 x Blow job/cunnilingus vouchers per year to be used

with the person of your choice :p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ban all wank-heads

and fucktards and twunts "
I may get more meets if they were banned from here

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Free biscuits for all over 50's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

3 day working week and 4 day weekend has been suggested to me today by another fabber

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

crush the cars of any one caught using a mobile phone while driveing

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By *hyllyphylly OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford

My serious law...

For pubs to decide if they allow smoking or not

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"My serious law...

For pubs to decide if they allow smoking or not"

That's definitely a six thumber.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One day a year...like the purge, where you can fuck anyone haha...swingers day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah a law where all pedos should be hung!!!!!!!!!....

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By *hyllyphylly OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"One day a year...like the purge, where you can fuck anyone haha...swingers day "

but not have sex the other 344 days?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One day a year...like the purge, where you can fuck anyone haha...swingers day

but not have sex the other 344 days?"

Lol no .. thats no good

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By *hris148Man
over a year ago

.


"I would like a cinema law that if you create any noise that involves bodily functions, food wrappers or technology your publically flogged outside.

With a bylaw of young people under 18 years of age not permitted in cinemas after 6pm.

And finally a bylaw stating that if a cinema is almost empty you must sit as far away from the others in the cinema already seated. NOT ON THEIR FECKIN LAPS!! "

Wouldn't the public flogging just attract BDSM exhibitionists?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Evert MP must clock in & out at the house of commons, 5 days a week (9 til 5)

Failure to turn up would be instant dismissal.

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

[Removed by poster at 28/06/13 18:14:48]

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By *ackandkateCouple
over a year ago

Truro

ban breast reductions

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

[Removed by poster at 28/06/13 18:17:57]

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By *ptimum trajectoryCouple
over a year ago

gloucester

the second law of thermodynamics

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By *amslam1000Man
over a year ago

willenhall

All MP's must read all the old fecking laws and reduce and re-write every one till they dont overlap and have loopholes

All new laws need to have a reality check on whether they are actually needed and have something similar allready in existence

road fund licence to be re-introduced and fecking used for the roads for gods fecking sake.

rant over till i think of some more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one allowed in shops looking like they are a Eastern block refugee thats had a heavy night on the piss and been dragged through a hedge backward.

Pyjamas, soiled tracckys and flip flops seem to be a common sight among my local supermarkets on a Sunday afternoon!

What happened to our sense of dress in this country?

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By *drianukMan
over a year ago

Spain, Lancs

All women must wear nice dresses or skirts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That for politicians to serve in government they must all be over 60 - have lived enough years with experiences n not look like a bunch of kids (to me) who should have a note from their mother saying they can b out alone! Oh n mental fitness assessment to prove they are not totally barmy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would ban the wearing of crocs in a public place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My serious law...

For pubs to decide if they allow smoking or not"

Never ever ban is best law introduced in last few years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would make it illegal to wear full face covers in banks etc same rule that applies to helmets should be introduced.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LMFAO!!!

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By *scariMan
over a year ago

Taunton

that stupid fashion of trousers at half mast should be punishable by death!

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village


"I would make it illegal to wear full face covers in banks etc same rule that applies to helmets should be introduced."

How surprising for you specificaly to make that comment

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

All shoulder chips to be surgically removed

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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago

Retirement Village

Everyone (especially a majority of the numpties in brum) to repeat their driving test every 5 years. If they can't keep in lane, speed, cut-up other drivers or drive like they own the road have them shot!!

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By * Jay69Man
over a year ago

Bridgwater - Somerset


"All MP's must read all the old fecking laws and reduce and re-write every one till they dont overlap and have loopholes

All new laws need to have a reality check on whether they are actually needed and have something similar allready in existence

road fund licence to be re-introduced and fecking used for the roads for gods fecking sake.

rant over till i think of some more "

New laws should have a sunset clause. That's a stated purpose and a time frame.

I.e. If we have a new road safety law and it is supposed to save X lives, after X years it is examined - if it did not work, or had unintended consequences, it's repealed.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"All MP's must read all the old fecking laws and reduce and re-write every one till they dont overlap and have loopholes

All new laws need to have a reality check on whether they are actually needed and have something similar allready in existence

road fund licence to be re-introduced and fecking used for the roads for gods fecking sake.

rant over till i think of some more

New laws should have a sunset clause. That's a stated purpose and a time frame.

I.e. If we have a new road safety law and it is supposed to save X lives, after X years it is examined - if it did not work, or had unintended consequences, it's repealed. "

Yep, the smoking ban would be a good place to start.

Is it working? not really, still just as many smokers.

Does it have unintended consequences? Yep, half the local pubs in the country have gone skint.

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By *EXY50ishWoman
over a year ago

Anywhere and nowhere

Haven't read all the threads so apologies if its already up there.

Only people who work are allowed to visit banks, post offices, dentists options etc etc at lunch time. FFS if you have nothing to do all day why go to the bank at lunchtime !!!!!

Rant over ( for a little while )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Another one should be all the smokers to be banned from moaning about smoking ban which is better for everyones health who for years had to endure the stench and associated health issues.

And fresh air is good for health so why moan about that when having fag outside.

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

People who moan about smokers but drive a car, own a dog that barks all F/kin night and/or own a cat that shits in other peoples gardens should get 5 years for hypocrisy.

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By *eforfuncplCouple
over a year ago

Morecambe

When u suck u can't spit lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When u suck u can't spit lol "

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By *hyllyphylly OP   Man
over a year ago

Bradford


"When u suck u can't spit lol "

Spitting should be illegal anyway

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By * Jay69Man
over a year ago

Bridgwater - Somerset


"When u suck u can't spit lol

Spitting should be illegal anyway"

Most certainly for sportsmen, who should have a hanky handy.

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By *ral.steveMan
over a year ago

LEEDS

A 7 day working week cos I work every weekend and have to put up with d*unken arsehole that think there cleaver and hard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All money is free

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone

Fine people for suddenly stopping on pavements in front of you and crossing in front of your path without saying sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Free entry into swingers clubs for all single males

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Cyclists that weave in and out of folk on a pedestrianised street in town at breakneck speed, should be made to do the same thing into oncoming traffic on the M1

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"Cyclists that weave in and out of folk on a pedestrianised street in town at breakneck speed, should be made to do the same thing into oncoming traffic on the M1 "

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