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"I'd fuck you, but only for a couple of hours." You are too far away | |||
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"Im washing my goldfish " I’ve got to wash my hair | |||
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"Look at the person above you and tell us the one completely ridiculous, petty or amusing reason why you wouldnt fuck them... Keep it funny, harmless and light-hearted. No nastiness or personal attacks. I’d fuck you, but…...." | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside" I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside I've got soul but I'm not a soldier." I’d fuck you but I prefer Batman | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. I’d fuck you but I prefer Batman " We would fight over Batman | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. I’d fuck you but I prefer Batman " I'd fuck you but I'm Batman | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. I’d fuck you but I prefer Batman " I’d fuck you but you have nicer hair than me | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄" I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷" I can't see you because my eyelashes are too long | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷" I've lost my dick somewhere 🤔 | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I can't see you because my eyelashes are too long" Your boobs are juicier than mine. | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷" I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow? | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow?" I'll find my waaaaaay home.... | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow?" He's too tired allegedly | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow? I'll find my waaaaaay home...." I don't like salsa  | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow? I'll find my waaaaaay home...." Hes the littlest hobo | |||
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"I’ve just stubbed my toe and it’s hurting like hell! Xx 😄 I'm rubbish at 1st aid. 🤷 I’m too tired right now. Maybe tomorrow? I'll find my waaaaaay home...." Stereophonics song 🙄 maybe tomorrow 🙄 | |||
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"I need beauty inside, not just outside I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. I’d fuck you but I prefer Batman I’d fuck you but you have nicer hair than me " Lol love it | |||
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"I’m sorry, I need to repot my cactus " He's only looking for fun | |||
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"Her boobs are bigger than mine " I i would but your boobs are way bigger than mine | |||
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"Her boobs are bigger than mine I i would but your boobs are way bigger than mine " Your boobs aren’t big enough 😂 | |||
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"Hes not decisive enough " She wants me to be decisive | |||
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"Or does she 🤔" I’d fuck you but you drink fosters 🤣 | |||
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"But I'm guessing you wouldn't fuck me " I only fuck rays of sunshine | |||
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"But I'm guessing you wouldn't fuck me I only fuck rays of sunshine " I'm afraid of wolves | |||
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"But I'm guessing you wouldn't fuck me I only fuck rays of sunshine " I haven't got any sunglasses | |||
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"But I'm guessing you wouldn't fuck me I only fuck rays of sunshine I'm afraid of wolves " You’re way too out of my league | |||
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"My flies are stuck and I can get my trousers down. " He's caught in a trap | |||
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"My flies are stuck and I can get my trousers down. He's caught in a trap " Id fuck u but ur tails in the way | |||
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"I prefer cows over bulls " He’s straight | |||
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"Im not in the mood for fun" She eats strawberries very seductively | |||
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"I can’t speak French " I can’t get my trousers off. | |||
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"I can’t speak French I can’t get my trousers off. " Not in the mood for sticks | |||
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"You 8 too much " I only like actual comms | |||
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"You 8 too much I only like actual comms" Hes Just eyes and thighs | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots…" I prefer semi skimmed | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed" I don't prefer semis | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis " I'm no good with laces | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis I'm no good with laces " I have fears of bees, flags, hands and arrows | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis I'm no good with laces I have fears of bees, flags, hands and arrows" Hands down, he won't bee getting it up | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis I'm no good with laces I have fears of bees, flags, hands and arrows Hands down, he won't bee getting it up " I'd never undo those shoes! | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis I'm no good with laces I have fears of bees, flags, hands and arrows Hands down, he won't bee getting it up I'd never undo those shoes!" No, can’t think of any reason why I wouldn’t.  | |||
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"Granny knots aren’t real bondage knots… I prefer semi skimmed I don't prefer semis I'm no good with laces I have fears of bees, flags, hands and arrows Hands down, he won't bee getting it up I'd never undo those shoes! No, can’t think of any reason why I wouldn’t. "I don’t like fish finger rolls | |||
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"He fiddles too much already " She's straight | |||
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"He fiddles too much already She's straight " We like chaos in the daylight | |||
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"Regrettably too far" Not far enough | |||
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"Regrettably too far Not far enough " He doesnt like closeness | |||
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"Regrettably too far Not far enough He doesnt like closeness " I fell off the chair. | |||
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"He can only see blue right now" Are they touring?  | |||
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"He can only see blue right now" Ur not looking for someone as young as me  | |||
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"He’s too young" Id rather have lasagne | |||
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"He’s too young" His hair is more shiny than mine | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine" Sadly she is straight | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight " Bit far away x | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x" I'm washing my non existent hair  | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair "He dresses better than me | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair
He dresses better than me"I prefer clothing over boobs | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair
He dresses better than me
I prefer clothing over boobs "He's too busy hunting for other ladies baps | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair
He dresses better than me
I prefer clothing over boobs
He's too busy hunting for other ladies baps"I’m not a fan of Jasper Carrot | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair
He dresses better than me
I prefer clothing over boobs
He's too busy hunting for other ladies baps"She’s always questioning my work 😂 | |||
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"He’s too young His hair is more shiny than mine Sadly she is straight Bit far away x I'm washing my non existent hair
He dresses better than me
I prefer clothing over boobs
He's too busy hunting for other ladies baps
I’m not a fan of Jasper Carrot"He may not like my accent | |||
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"Im too distracted by the belt " but its a long way to go  | |||
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"Im too distracted by the belt but its a long way to go "I don’t know where Inverness is 🤦♂️ | |||
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"To tiper🤷🤣🤣..... can't spell it. " I need to buy you something better to drink than fosters🤣 | |||
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"Your pet monkey bit my testicles" It’s ok I will punish him | |||
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"To tiper🤷🤣🤣..... can't spell it. " next time I’ll write the full sentence  | |||
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"To tiper🤷🤣🤣..... can't spell it. next time I’ll write the full sentence "Hes too big for me 😲 | |||
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"I don't fuck simps" You’re too far away | |||
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"I don't fuck simps" Shed drink all my rum | |||
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"I don't fuck simps" She doesn’t fuck 🤷🏻♂️ | |||
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"I don't fuck simps She doesn’t fuck 🤷🏻♂️" Nor do I these days! | |||
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"I don't fuck simps She doesn’t fuck 🤷🏻♂️ Nor do I these days! " He’s too honest | |||
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"I don't fuck simps She doesn’t fuck 🤷🏻♂️ Nor do I these days! He’s too honest " He only wants my baps | |||
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"I don't fuck simps She doesn’t fuck 🤷🏻♂️ Nor do I these days! He’s too honest He only wants my baps " I prefer a bun | |||
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"Your nips would give me black eyes…" I only like semi skimmed | |||
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"His name isn’t even eric" I prefer amatriciana | |||
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"His name isn’t even eric" His car has a bona | |||
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"Hes got a dirty pussy " She’s not into filth | |||
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"Hes got a dirty pussy She’s not into filth " He's got undissolved issues | |||
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"Hes got a dirty pussy She’s not into filth He's got undissolved issues " | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 10/08/26 22:34:04]" He removed his post | |||
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"They clap on landing." I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes | |||
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"They clap on landing. I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes " it’s a long way to go but I’ll be lucky if I can match 3 mins | |||
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"They clap on landing. I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes it’s a long way to go but I’ll be lucky if I can match 3 mins "I forgot to bring a half-time orange for the three minutes | |||
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"They clap on landing. I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes it’s a long way to go but I’ll be lucky if I can match 3 mins
I forgot to bring a half-time orange for the three minutes "I’d fuck you but you forgot the half time oranges haha | |||
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"They clap on landing. I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes it’s a long way to go but I’ll be lucky if I can match 3 mins
I forgot to bring a half-time orange for the three minutes I’d fuck you but you forgot the half time oranges haha "You might not be amused when I pull out the grapefruit | |||
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"They clap on landing. I would ,but it's a long way to go for three minutes it’s a long way to go but I’ll be lucky if I can match 3 mins
I forgot to bring a half-time orange for the three minutes I’d fuck you but you forgot the half time oranges haha
You might not be amused when I pull out the grapefruit "I might be more concerned about you putting it in  | |||
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"I’m covered in body butter " I need to get a grip 🤣 | |||
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"But I want all the cum" No entry, just cum | |||
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"But I want all the cum No entry, just cum " He always talks about cumming and I like girls who talk about dirty pussys and baps | |||
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"But I want all the cum No entry, just cum He always talks about cumming and I like girls who talk about dirty pussys and baps" I have no baps | |||
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"But I want all the cum" You’d be welcome to it  | |||
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"But I want all the cum You’d be welcome to it "I would but there’s already someone in here called sinfully, it’s just confusing now | |||
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"My wife won’t unlock my chastity cage." The budgie flew off with the key | |||
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"My wife won’t unlock my chastity cage. The budgie flew off with the key " I'd fuck you but I can't find your answer. | |||
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"My wife won’t unlock my chastity cage. The budgie flew off with the key I'd fuck you but I can't find your answer." You would be very disappointed | |||
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"My wife won’t unlock my chastity cage. The budgie flew off with the key I'd fuck you but I can't find your answer. You would be very disappointed " I would wake up and realise it had all been a dres. | |||
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"My wife won’t unlock my chastity cage. The budgie flew off with the key I'd fuck you but I can't find your answer. You would be very disappointed I would wake up and realise it had all been a dres." DREAM | |||
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"Everyone seems to be asleep. I can’t fuck you while you sleep " Your standards are too high 🤣 | |||
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"Everyone seems to be asleep. I can’t fuck you while you sleep Your standards are too high 🤣" My feet are too sore | |||
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"Everyone seems to be asleep. I can’t fuck you while you sleep Your standards are too high 🤣" What that I want my partner to be awake 🤣 | |||
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"Everyone seems to be asleep. I can’t fuck you while you sleep Your standards are too high 🤣 My feet are too sore "I can massage them | |||
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"You are out of order x" What for? | |||
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"You are out of juice" I’m full of juice | |||
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"You are out of juice I’m full of juice " He’s always on the juice | |||
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