FabSwingers.com forum: Some people have no idea about ordinary life!

By *ENGUY OP Man
over a year ago

Hull

I overheard this today in my local branch of Subway, in the centre of Ascot.

Today was the start of Royal Ascot week; I'd gone into town for some shopping and stopped off in Subway, having my meal, watching all the racegoers in their finest clothes passing by.

In walked a couple; he was very smartly dressed in an expensive suit, buttonhole flower in his collar lapel and she was dressed up to the nines and was very attractive!

Every time she spoke, her accent could have cut glass!

Her: But darling, this is a Sandwich Shop!"

Him: "I know, but they're very good!"

Her: "Do they do Caviar?"

Him: "No"

After ordering, she looks around and asks, "Where's the waiter to carry my tray?"

Him: "You carry your own!"

Her: "What?????"

Once at her table, she was heard to say, "Where's my knife and fork?"

He muttered something in her ear to which she intoned,

"I have to use my hands????"

Cue laughter from everyone else in the place!!!!

Some folks have no idea!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve often tried blagging my way to cheeky upgrade by subtly pretending I was a member of the aristocracy…….

Its never worked for me though..!!!!

I usually end up giving myself away by being far to posh…

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By *ondonpride69Couple
over a year ago

Blackpool

What, no pie and mash shops in Ascot.... The place has gone down hill

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love these kind of people, roughing it and clearly way out their depth.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They might have just being joking though …….

Hey, I’d do sumit like that if I thought I’d get someone to bite..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What, no pie and mash shops in Ascot.... The place has gone down hill

No pie and mash outside the north circular, never mind the M25

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By *oulou45Woman
over a year ago

Bucks

"What, no pie and mash shops in Ascot.... The place has gone down hill

No pie and mash outside the north circular, never mind the M25"
Tell me about it we used to have to drive from Herts to London and by loads for everyone at the community centre in herts lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im surprised snobs lower their standards even stepping foot in subway lol

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

There is a pie and mash shop in Southend, I don't know if that in the North circular of not, I used to think Southend was on the south coast, I was really upset when I found out it is no where near the sea either.

I failed GCSE Geography!!

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

"I love these kind of people, roughing it and clearly way out their depth.

Oh.. yes.. I would Bet That They Are Probably at the Manor House and Having A Rather Bloody Good Laugh at Just How They Actually Ended Up in Some Grotty Little Cafe...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Turn this round and you go into a posh restaurant unsure which cutlery to use you whisper to your partner for guidance, other diners overhear and burst out laughing at your ignorance. How hilarious!! Everyone has feelings even rich posh people.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I have a feeling it was all for show...but that is just me..

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By *hyllyphyllyMan
over a year ago

Bradford

That honestly made me laugh

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By *ondonpride69Couple
over a year ago

Blackpool

"What, no pie and mash shops in Ascot.... The place has gone down hill

No pie and mash outside the north circular, never mind the M25Tell me about it we used to have to drive from Herts to London and by loads for everyone at the community centre in herts lol"

Manze has a web site and delivers. It the way forward if your north of the Watford gap

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I make me own pie mash and liquor

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By *livia_KWoman
over a year ago

South London

Eavesdropping on strangers' conversations is one of my favourite passtimes

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

"I make me own pie mash and liquor

Im yorkshire originally.. and i love my pie n mash n peas..

whats the liquor ??? gravy ??

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By *ondonpride69Couple
over a year ago

Blackpool

"I make me own pie mash and liquor

Im yorkshire originally.. and i love my pie n mash n peas..

whats the liquor ??? gravy ??

My northern wife calls it green gravy even after 27yrs of marriage. Tried to educate her, but have given up

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

My scots hubby calls "Mushy-peas" - Green Gravy..lol

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I would not eat a sandwich with knife and fork either - but nothing wrong with some nice table manners or am I missing something here?

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I overheard this today in my local branch of Subway, in the centre of Ascot.

Today was the start of Royal Ascot week; I'd gone into town for some shopping and stopped off in Subway, having my meal, watching all the racegoers in their finest clothes passing by.

In walked a couple; he was very smartly dressed in an expensive suit, buttonhole flower in his collar lapel and she was dressed up to the nines and was very attractive!

Every time she spoke, her accent could have cut glass!

Her: But darling, this is a Sandwich Shop!"

Him: "I know, but they're very good!"

Her: "Do they do Caviar?"

Him: "No"

After ordering, she looks around and asks, "Where's the waiter to carry my tray?"

Him: "You carry your own!"

Her: "What?????"

Once at her table, she was heard to say, "Where's my knife and fork?"

He muttered something in her ear to which she intoned,

"I have to use my hands????"

Cue laughter from everyone else in the place!!!!

Some folks have no idea!!!!!

Sounds precise and made me smile however in reality even the poshest offspring in private schools nip off to the fast food joints so they may have been on a wind up

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

"
Do you like caviar?

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"however in reality even the poshest offspring in private schools nip off to the fast food joints so they may have been on a wind up

this..

even the younger Royal family members are more 'aware' of life outside their bubble than several decades ago..

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

"
How about champagne to go with it?

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Dont think they have a Liquor Licence

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like they were taking the piss and you fell for it. Even the poshies know how to eat a sandwich, it was one of them that invented the things. Also even in the most exclusive establishments you wouldn't see caviar on the menu. Lastly if they were proper posh they would have been chauffeur driven all the way in to the races. Seems like they had the last laugh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont waste time treasuring life....just live it

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

"
Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sounds like they were taking the piss and you fell for it. Even the poshies know how to eat a sandwich, it was one of them that invented the things. Also even in the most exclusive establishments you wouldn't see caviar on the menu. Lastly if they were proper posh they would have been chauffeur driven all the way in to the races. Seems like they had the last laugh. "

I was thinking the same too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

Awww Affro,,,, so my plan of tempting you with a bottle of Newcastle brown ale and half a Greggs pastie ain’t gonna cut it… sigh,,,,

Oh well, I suppose I can ask for a refund on the beer but I’ve already nibbled the corner of the pastie so I guess thats my lunch sorted for tomorrow ….. tuh

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

As a pescetarian one consumes more fish produce than you can shake a metaphorical stick at.

Caviar wouldn't be my first or indeed last choice in fishied options.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turn this round and you go into a posh restaurant unsure which cutlery to use you whisper to your partner for guidance, other diners overhear and burst out laughing at your ignorance. How hilarious!! Everyone has feelings even rich posh people."

That's a very good point!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

Awww Affro,,,, so my plan of tempting you with a bottle of Newcastle brown ale and half a Greggs pastie ain’t gonna cut it… sigh,,,,

Oh well, I suppose I can ask for a refund on the beer but I’ve already nibbled the corner of the pastie so I guess thats my lunch sorted for tomorrow ….. tuh

"
I do love a nibble -but it has to be refined in manner and delicate in flavour;-)

Now where's that thing I get get my teeth into

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

As a pescetarian one consumes more fish produce than you can shake a metaphorical stick at.

Caviar wouldn't be my first or indeed last choice in fishied options.

"
We should compare notes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was thinking the same too.

Some people like to pretend they are posh when in reality they are gutter trash on a day out. It all ads to the amusement so smile and enjoy the B/S

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

That's a very good point!

Good point indeed - seconded. BTW you dont have to be rich to be posh - often rich is kind of the opposite of posh and that is quite funny to watch when people are trying to be something they are not.

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

As a pescetarian one consumes more fish produce than you can shake a metaphorical stick at.

Caviar wouldn't be my first or indeed last choice in fishied options.

We should compare notes

Re fish produce only or doth the lady suggest illicit potential ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I heard a lad in a chippy asking his mate if the green stuff in one of the pots on the stove was guacamole.

I don't know what he would have made of pea wet, scraps and gravy. With a barmcake to mop it all up.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

As a pescetarian one consumes more fish produce than you can shake a metaphorical stick at.

Caviar wouldn't be my first or indeed last choice in fishied options.

We should compare notes

Re fish produce only or doth the lady suggest illicit potential ?

"
Potentials need to be discusse din far more detail

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By *allDarkFoxForYouMan
over a year ago

Winchester/London

"Caviar in subway sounds a winning menu option to moi

Do you like caviar?

I'm not adverse to savouring said flavour ma'am

How about champagne to go with it?

Don't mind if I do.

You sound like a lady of cultured taste ?

Can I confess that I dislike caviar but love champagne? And yes, I do like the finer things in life - hope that does not put people off

As a pescetarian one consumes more fish produce than you can shake a metaphorical stick at.

Caviar wouldn't be my first or indeed last choice in fishied options.

We should compare notes

Re fish produce only or doth the lady suggest illicit potential ?

Potentials need to be discusse din far more detail

Indeed they do as prudency wears the pants or possibly does not ?

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By *enithWoman
over a year ago

closer than you think

my other half chauffeured his client to Ascot today but wasn't asked to stop at Subway!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

reverse snobbery is alive and well then

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I overheard this today in my local branch of Subway, in the centre of Ascot.

Today was the start of Royal Ascot week; I'd gone into town for some shopping and stopped off in Subway, having my meal, watching all the racegoers in their finest clothes passing by.

In walked a couple; he was very smartly dressed in an expensive suit, buttonhole flower in his collar lapel and she was dressed up to the nines and was very attractive!

Every time she spoke, her accent could have cut glass!

Her: But darling, this is a Sandwich Shop!"

Him: "I know, but they're very good!"

Her: "Do they do Caviar?"

Him: "No"

After ordering, she looks around and asks, "Where's the waiter to carry my tray?"

Him: "You carry your own!"

Her: "What?????"

Once at her table, she was heard to say, "Where's my knife and fork?"

He muttered something in her ear to which she intoned,

"I have to use my hands????"

Cue laughter from everyone else in the place!!!!

Some folks have no idea!!!!!

Sounds precise and made me smile however in reality even the poshest offspring in private schools nip off to the fast food joints so they may have been on a wind up

I thought so too.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

My friend who is quite "ordinary" whatever that means, we're all ordinary to ourselves after all, asked for cutlery in McDonalds she'd never been in there before and assumed she'd be given at least a fork for her chips. The manager found her a plastic set that came with a salad.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Sounds like they were taking the piss to me and you fell for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For all you northerners, liquor is a white gravy type liquid sludge with little bits of chopped parsley that looks like a bowl full of spunk with bits of snot floating in it.

Little cockney enclaves like sarfend and margit occasionally have pie and mash shops for the exiles.

There is one in leysdown on the isle of sheppy. (Not as glamourous as it sounds)

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