FabSwingers.com forum: Old skool insults

By *layfullsam OP Man
23 hours ago

Solihull

Some weren’t very pc but let’s have them

I’ve got a match, your face and my arse

You’ve got a face like a Nagasaki bomb dodgers left flip flop

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By *evilinyouMan
23 hours ago

Bristol

Haha good thread 👍

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By *layfullsam OP Man
23 hours ago

Solihull

You muppet

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By *layfullsam OP Man
23 hours ago

Solihull

"Haha good thread 👍"

Thank you my good man 🫡

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By *hickthighs26Woman
23 hours ago

your hotlist

Doyle

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By *oyoteUglyWoman
23 hours ago

Somewhere dark and gloomy

Go ask your mum who your dad is

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
23 hours ago

Bristol

You're a cunt...

It's as fresh today as it ever was

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By *ude LawMan
23 hours ago

Harrogate

You see that thread with no replies?

That's you, that is.

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By *actile TensionMan
23 hours ago

Sussex

That's a bit below the belt, bit like your mother's tits

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By *ensuallover1000Man
23 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

You’ve got a face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
23 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"You're a cunt...

It's as fresh today as it ever was "

A timeless classic 😁👍🏻👍🏻

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By *evilinyouMan
23 hours ago

Bristol

"You're a cunt...

It's as fresh today as it ever was "

It's still my go to 👍

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By *onin25Man
23 hours ago

Durham

"You see that thread with no replies?

That's you, that is."

History Today loved it, saw them do it live twice

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By *evilinyouMan
23 hours ago

Bristol

"Go ask your mum who your dad is"

Haha quality 😅😅

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By *onin25Man
23 hours ago

Durham

Dicksplat

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By *carlettsWoman
23 hours ago

Harpenden

"Talk to the hand 'cause the face ain't listening"

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By *carlettsWoman
23 hours ago

Harpenden

Munch wipe

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By *uckMe12FreeMan
23 hours ago

(User no longer on site)

Pleb. Still no idea what it means, other than it's now a T.V programme.

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By *ude LawMan
23 hours ago

Harrogate

"You see that thread with no replies?

That's you, that is.

History Today loved it, saw them do it live twice "

Saw Rob Newman do his philosophy thing a few years ago.

It was good, but you just wanted him to say this.

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By *uitedGent.Man
22 hours ago

Milton Keynes

"Pleb. Still no idea what it means, other than it's now a T.V programme. "

Such a good tv show 😅

Was a term to describe someone beneath you, either financially or class status

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By *hilly1515Man
22 hours ago

the return insult...reply

shut up you piss flap

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By *ineapplePixieCouple
22 hours ago

S.Wales

You absolute wetwipe ✨️

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By *ensuallover1000Man
22 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Spanner, plonker, dipshit.

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By *layfullsam OP Man
22 hours ago

Solihull

Your mum

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By *aFemmeCoquetteWoman
22 hours ago

Somewhere in the middle not the.....

Eeww you minger

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By *onin25Man
22 hours ago

Durham

"You see that thread with no replies?

That's you, that is.

History Today loved it, saw them do it live twice

Saw Rob Newman do his philosophy thing a few years ago.

It was good, but you just wanted him to say this."

I saw Newman and Baddiel twice, around the time of the Mary Whitehouse Experience (went with my Dad and might have been the youngest person there). They both did solo sets and then they did some of their sketches. Baddiel was funnier but his set was virtually identical both times, whereas Newman's was brand new the second time.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
22 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Cretin - a politically incorrect term nowadays although most folk are likely unaware that it previously, officially described a medical condition/extreme form of learning disability.

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By *earditallWoman
22 hours ago

Lancaster

Bozzy eyed twat...used to call my cousin this.

My other cousin i called Burt Reynolds her tash would have rivalled his anyway.

Wazzack

Bum chums

Pratt

Divvy

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By *avexxMan
22 hours ago

cheshire

"Bozzy eyed twat...used to call my cousin this.

My other cousin i called Burt Reynolds her tash would have rivalled his anyway.

Wazzack

Bum chums

Pratt

Divvy

"
.. did she have hairy chest like burt

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By *hilly1515Man
22 hours ago

we had a maths teacher in the first year of big school who dished cretin out with extreme venom... you did not mess with him took no shit off of no kid

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By *aFemmeCoquetteWoman
22 hours ago

Somewhere in the middle not the.....

You're a right munter

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By *sleWightCoupleCouple
22 hours ago

Ryde

"You dick-splash!"

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By *ensuallover1000Man
22 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Bozzy eyed twat...used to call my cousin this.

My other cousin i called Burt Reynolds her tash would have rivalled his anyway.

Wazzack

Bum chums

Pratt

Divvy

😂😂😂 Wazzack and Divvy - those bring back some memories 😂😂

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By *ensuallover1000Man
22 hours ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Dweeb - I love that one.

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By *attieTV/TS
22 hours ago

Nottingham

Most of the ones I remember from the 80's were either homophobic or references to physical disorders

Bender, poofter, Gaylord, shitstabber, lesbo

Mongo, Doylam, Joey, Spazmo

Thankfully they seem to have fallen out of favour.

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By *earditallWoman
22 hours ago

Lancaster

"Bozzy eyed twat...used to call my cousin this.

My other cousin i called Burt Reynolds her tash would have rivalled his anyway.

Wazzack

Bum chums

Pratt

Divvy

.. did she have hairy chest like burt

Probably

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By *earditallWoman
22 hours ago

Lancaster

"Most of the ones I remember from the 80's were either homophobic or references to physical disorders

Bender, poofter, Gaylord, shitstabber, lesbo

Mongo, Doylam, Joey, Spazmo

Thankfully they seem to have fallen out of favour.

They were pretty offensive by today's standards ... it's good we have moved on really

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By *uri00620Woman
22 hours ago

Croydon

Plank

Buttmonkey/Butthead

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By *morousCouple8Couple
22 hours ago

Cumbria

"Most of the ones I remember from the 80's were either homophobic or references to physical disorders

Bender, poofter, Gaylord, shitstabber, lesbo

Mongo, Doylam, Joey, Spazmo

Thankfully they seem to have fallen out of favour.

I’m glad lots have gone!

One I remember from school was - whatever minger your mum works at McDonald's on minimum wage - with the hands 🫣

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By *hilly1515Man
22 hours ago

I used joey in front of my mum to my brother once...

she hit me with that may lefts I was beginning her for the big right... never ever uttered again in jest or anger...

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By *CExeCouple
22 hours ago

Lincoln/Exeter

Gimp

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By *attieTV/TS
22 hours ago

Nottingham

Knobhead

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By *urpleburgularalarmMan
22 hours ago

nowhere, next to neverbeenthere

Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp🤪

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By *ellsOMan
22 hours ago

hull

I remember we went through a phase in the late 80's of calling each other a blocker, no clue what it meant

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By *ellsOMan
22 hours ago

hull

Bocker* not blocker

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By *hinstrapMan
22 hours ago

sheffield

Ya ma sucks cocks for ciggies

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By *carlet SeductionWoman
22 hours ago

Maidstone

Fleabag. That was literally it when i was at school

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By *umfun24Man
22 hours ago

wilmslow

Sack of shit.

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By *eauNaturelMan
22 hours ago

Mortonhampstead for a few days

Your right OP, many insults weren't very considerate of others as they often ridiculed those in society that appeared to be different from the considered 'norm'.

In the Army if a soldier was given given a sick note by the doctor, the note was referred to as a 'bif-chick'; the word 'bif' referred to Spina bifida.

The term 'monging it'; with the word mong referring to Mongoloids a now unacceptable and highly offensive term for people with Down syndrome.

I'll be honest, many years ago, I did used both of these terms as insults but I wouldn't dream of doing it now.

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By *ernow gentMan
22 hours ago

valhalla

Lizard

Clockwobble

Thundercunt

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By *couse GitMan
22 hours ago

Newton

She was a model....... for manhole covers

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By *morousCouple8Couple
22 hours ago

Cumbria

You’ve a face for radio

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By *ellhungvweMan
22 hours ago

Cheltenham

"Most of the ones I remember from the 80's were either homophobic or references to physical disorders

Bender, poofter, Gaylord, shitstabber, lesbo

Mongo, Doylam, Joey, Spazmo

Thankfully they seem to have fallen out of favour.

And these were just the ones the teachers used to use

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By *iceguymark69Man
22 hours ago

Hull

Joey Deacon

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By *CExeCouple
22 hours ago

Lincoln/Exeter

"Your right OP, many insults weren't very considerate of others as they often ridiculed those in society that appeared to be different from the considered 'norm'.

In the Army if a soldier was given given a sick note by the doctor, the note was referred to as a 'bif-chick'; the word 'bif' referred to Spina bifida.

The term 'monging it'; with the word mong referring to Mongoloids a now unacceptable and highly offensive term for people with Down syndrome.

I'll be honest, many years ago, I did used both of these terms as insults but I wouldn't dream of doing it now."

Mate of mine broke his back at RMAS Sandhurst. He was told... 'man up', 'take your balls out of your handbag' and 'stop being such a poofter'. My military time was late nineties through to mid noughties and some of the language and behaviour was beyond unacceptable even then.

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By *WB85Man
22 hours ago

Staffordshire

Bellend. Its still a personal favourite of mine.

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By *ermite12ukMan
22 hours ago

Solihull and Romford

If dynamite was brains. You wouldn't have enough to blow your hat off.

Is some village missing it's idiot?

You should be on the stage. Cleaning it.

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By *hilly1515Man
22 hours ago

"Oi village"

was pretty scathing in the rite context.

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By *earditallWoman
22 hours ago

Lancaster

"Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp🤪"

We used that but more a bulldog licking piss off a thistle

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By *elix SightedMan
21 hours ago

Cloud 8

You know that noise you used to make when you put your tongue on the other side of your bottom teeth to mimic someone being dumb - how do you spell it? That was always a go to up to about the age of 14.

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By *ancashireredheadWoman
21 hours ago

Lancashire

Pillock, berk, melon and my personal favourite cunty bollocks.

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By *oeBeansMan
21 hours ago

Derby

You knob-jockey

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By *obwhateverMan
21 hours ago

Mordor

Yer Ma’s yer Da an yer Da’s yer Ma

Yer Ma sells Avon

Yer Da sells Avon

Smell yer Ma

Various other “Ma” based insults.

You: plum, spoon, doughnut, doughball, channel, balloon, diddy-ride (titwank in Scots), spanner, it was basically calling people whatever inanimate object which sprung to mind.

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By *oeBeansMan
21 hours ago

Derby

When having a verbal back and forth, someone would ultimately say "nice comeback. If you want my comeback, you need to wipe it off your Mum's chin"

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By *hilly1515Man
21 hours ago

"When having a verbal back and forth, someone would ultimately say "nice comeback. If you want my comeback, you need to wipe it off your Mum's chin""

lmao .. Joe. that's the winner

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By *igma GoatMan
21 hours ago

London

I know 5 fat people in this city and your mom is 3 of them.

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By *inkShyWoman
21 hours ago

near Windsor

Arsewipe

Divvy

Dimlow

Pleb

Mong

Gobshite

And I have no idea why but a girl always got called Corn breath 😂

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By *ools and the brainCouple
21 hours ago

couple, us we him her.

"Joey Deacon"

Poor joey he never did anything wrong yet became an object of ridicule.

Sadly he's not with us anymore.

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By *layfullsam OP Man
21 hours ago

Solihull

Some village is missing it’s idiot

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By *aFemmeCoquetteWoman
21 hours ago

Somewhere in the middle not the.....

The itchy chin hand gesture

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By *umfun24Man
21 hours ago

wilmslow

"I know 5 fat people in this city and your mom is 3 of them.

Oh god !! The mum insults. I’m cringing just at the thought.

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By *layfullsam OP Man
21 hours ago

Solihull

benny after the crossroads guy

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By *oeBeansMan
21 hours ago

Derby

You can't beat a classic crotch chop

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By *rHarding RMan
21 hours ago

East Midlands

Binner

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By *rHarding RMan
21 hours ago

East Midlands

Cocknose

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By *espoke SwingerMan
21 hours ago

leicester

You've got a face like a slapped arse is always a classic

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By *aFemmeCoquetteWoman
21 hours ago

Somewhere in the middle not the.....

I dont think so Tim

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By *eacupsbearCouple
19 hours ago

York

Cunt muffin.

Festering tit

Shit drizzle.

Three of my faves.

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By *ddie1966Man
19 hours ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your genitals.

Always makes me smile that one

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
19 hours ago

SW1A1AA

[Removed by poster at 22/04/26 23:23:16]

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By *parkle1974Woman
19 hours ago

Leeds

You should have been swallowed

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
19 hours ago

SW1A1AA

Cowbag was really bad to say at primary school

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By *kphooey43Man
19 hours ago

Barnet

Lying Arab.

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By *andleit1980Man
19 hours ago

BRISTOL

Just simply

Your Mum

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By *umfun24Man
17 hours ago

wilmslow

"You should have been swallowed "

Hmmmmmmm, and that’s an insult? 🤔

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By *mandatomCouple
16 hours ago

London

Ughhh Joey

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
11 hours ago

Leeds

You’re so ugly your mum fed you with a catapult.

The mr

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By *oyoteUglyWoman
11 hours ago

Somewhere dark and gloomy

"You should have been swallowed

Hmmmmmmm, and that’s an insult? 🤔"

Give it a minute...

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By *onnachakeaneMan
11 hours ago

Dundrum

You’ve a smirk on ya like a cat with a cream flavoured arsehole

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By *oiluvfunMan
11 hours ago

Penrith

I could go off you, you know? Assuming I liked you in the first place….

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By *umfun24Man
11 hours ago

wilmslow

When you were born, you were so ugly that the midwife slapped your mum

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By *oiluvfunMan
11 hours ago

Penrith

Are you actually gay, or do you just like the look?

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By *illiam101000Man
11 hours ago

Melton Mowbray

"You're a cunt...

It's as fresh today as it ever was "

Straight to the point and no messing around. Best way.

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By *ore than anotherMan
10 hours ago

Torquay

Thats an old school classic. As well as gay lord, grimbo,cabbage, slap head.

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By *ore than anotherMan
10 hours ago

Torquay

"Joey Deacon"
absolute classic lmfao

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By *ore than anotherMan
10 hours ago

Torquay

"The itchy chin hand gesture"
lmao Jimmy Hill umm.

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By *dible_KinkCouple
10 hours ago

Aberdeen

I like the ones that are basically inoffensive to most, but scathing to your friends. There was a fame called "Toejam and Earl" and their insult was "Poindexter", saying this about one of our friends was worse than telling then you'd shaged their grandmother!!!! Or simply calling them a "Wazzock" - a stupid sounding word which conveys exactly what you think of the person at that precise moment.

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By *ogerroger69Man
10 hours ago

West Yorks

Joey Deacon?

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By *ocialablechapMan
10 hours ago

Paphos and also SW UK

Some village is missing it's idiot

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By *atpurrWoman
10 hours ago

Kent

Best I ever heard was…..”your mum wears flip flops” 😂

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By *ore than anotherMan
10 hours ago

Torquay

"Joey Deacon (1920–1981) was a British author and disability advocate with severe cerebral palsy who became famous after appearing on Blue Peter in 1981. Tragically, his name was adopted as 1980s British playground slang to taunt people as "stupid" or slow, accompanied by mocking gestures, turning a story of triumph into a derogatory insult?"

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By *regen1000Man
9 hours ago

Erith

Or a simple belm and "uurr"!

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
8 hours ago

hexham

You are so ugly, it looks like your face has been in fire and someone has put it out with a shovel!

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By *adoldmeMan
8 hours ago

, Braintree

Ones we can't use any more ..

Spaz..

Drip..

Moron..

The best is still

Wanker...

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By *ungfunfellaMan
8 hours ago

Lincoln

[Removed by poster at 23/04/26 10:50:15]

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By *ungfunfellaMan
8 hours ago

Lincoln

Spacker

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By *rklightMan
8 hours ago

mossley

ya dad sells Avon

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By *ensualbicockMan
8 hours ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

Biff !

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By *ensualbicockMan
7 hours ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

"ya dad sells Avon "

Ya Ma wears West Ham socks in bed

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By *riginal_FlirtWoman
7 hours ago

Antrim

You cumclot

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By *he_Tall_OneMan
7 hours ago

Oxfordshire

Batty boy!

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By *rodigal funCouple
7 hours ago

Leinster/Ulster

Wally

Plonker

Prat

Dipstick

Chicken shit

Fuckwit

Dickwad

S 🙊

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By *ee04Man
7 hours ago

Essex

Can’t fix stupid.

Spawny eyed parrot faced wazack

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By *valanche6969Man
5 hours ago

Blackburn

You look like you’d be a flat earther!!

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By *rthur30Man
5 hours ago

Warrington

"Pleb. Still no idea what it means, other than it's now a T.V programme. "

From the Latin plebeian meaning a member of the common people.

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By *issolvedOrdersMan
5 hours ago

Bristol

Tosser

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By *ohn 66Man
5 hours ago

South Birmingham

My mum's phrase for anyone with too much perfume / aftershave...

"You smell like the inside of a tart's handbag"

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By *esirableencountersMan
5 hours ago

NorthEast

Yo mama so fat i rolled over twice and was still on top of her !!

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
4 hours ago

Chichester

Window licker

Moon baby

Sanjay

Common terms only school era

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By *esirableencountersMan
4 hours ago

NorthEast

"Window licker

Moon baby

Sanjay

Common terms only school era "

Hahaha the good old days

Imagine the grief these days

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By *ozapperMan
4 hours ago

Lancashire

Pathetic arse wipe

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By *issolvedOrdersMan
4 hours ago

Bristol

"Window licker

Moon baby

Sanjay

Common terms only school era

Hahaha the good old days

Imagine the grief these days "

Mong is definitely one you can use now

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By *mileyculturebelfastMan
4 hours ago

belfast

Ballbeg

Ballroot

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By *hief ScoutMan
3 hours ago

Middx/Herts borders-ish or thereabouts !

Spawny eyed parrot faced wazack"

"Cheer up lads. I've got you some nice brown bread and butter for ya tea"

"Eeeeee, me father went crackers. Ee reached aaaart, and gently pulled me mam towards him bit' throat....."

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
3 hours ago

Chichester

"Window licker

Moon baby

Sanjay

Common terms only school era

Hahaha the good old days

Imagine the grief these days "

Tbh I still use them at times

. Shoot me I am evil

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By *dmundwilsonMan
3 hours ago

Llandudno

Wouldn’t piss in their face if their eyebrows were on fire.

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By *esirableencountersMan
3 hours ago

NorthEast

"Window licker

Moon baby

Sanjay

Common terms only school era

Hahaha the good old days

Imagine the grief these days

Tbh I still use them at times

. Shoot me I am evil

Now I’m trying to figure out which one you used for me

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