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What moment

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington

Was the last time you really grew as a person?

Was it a passing comment from a random stranger that made you question your life choices?

Was it some idle Tuesday when a thought was the catalyst for change?

Or was it a major event that made you change your life and mindset?

For me it was the moment I realised that I had been trying to fix people instead of letting myself heal, that moment was the start of a 10 year evolution from a man who would let women walk all over me while I tried to help them only to resent myself when they eventually cheated on me.

I’ve come a long way in the last decade, my only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
7 days ago

East Sussex

I think my life has been a series of small growing experiences rather than one big one.

I suspect that hitting 70 might cause some assessment of priorities though

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"I think my life has been a series of small growing experiences rather than one big one.

I suspect that hitting 70 might cause some assessment of priorities though "

I think that’s how it should be, but for some people life events change them, I have a work colleague who went into lockdown married with children, last year he married a man, life comes at some of us really fast

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By *ellinever70Woman
7 days ago

Ayrshire

I'm not that introspective

But I can appreciate what's shaped me to be who I am

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By *hortieWoman
7 days ago

Northampton

When hubby died 19 years ago. That put a lot of things into perspective.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"I'm not that introspective

But I can appreciate what's shaped me to be who I am"

I am, and I’m at the point of being excited about what is to come, life is an adventure and you never know what is coming next

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By *histle do nicelyMan
7 days ago

Glasgow South


"Was the last time you really grew as a person?

Was it a passing comment from a random stranger that made you question your life choices?

Was it some idle Tuesday when a thought was the catalyst for change?

Or was it a major event that made you change your life and mindset?

For me it was the moment I realised that I had been trying to fix people instead of letting myself heal, that moment was the start of a 10 year evolution from a man who would let women walk all over me while I tried to help them only to resent myself when they eventually cheated on me.

I’ve come a long way in the last decade, my only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner."
For me it's when the gran children came along...A second go at being in a world where children need you

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By *ontyboi76Man
7 days ago

Pontypridd

If looking at big moments that car crash life or just make you think from outside of your comfort, then its last year. I freed my wife to play and from that I reassed myself and if I had given her the life she deserved and the sex. In the end it was positive and brought us back very close.

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By *viatrixWoman
7 days ago

Gatwick

This week I applied for a job that I have wanted since I was a child.

I’ve gone through the first of many stages. Don’t know how far I will get but I am so proud of myself for gettijg over the mental block of not even considering applying in the past. A lifetime of people telling me “you can’t” did their job well. Until now. 🩷🎀

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By *histle do nicelyMan
7 days ago

Glasgow South


"This week I applied for a job that I have wanted since I was a child.

I’ve gone through the first of many stages. Don’t know how far I will get but I am so proud of myself for gettijg over the mental block of not even considering applying in the past. A lifetime of people telling me “you can’t” did their job well. Until now. 🩷🎀"
wishing you success

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"Was the last time you really grew as a person?

Was it a passing comment from a random stranger that made you question your life choices?

Was it some idle Tuesday when a thought was the catalyst for change?

Or was it a major event that made you change your life and mindset?

For me it was the moment I realised that I had been trying to fix people instead of letting myself heal, that moment was the start of a 10 year evolution from a man who would let women walk all over me while I tried to help them only to resent myself when they eventually cheated on me.

I’ve come a long way in the last decade, my only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner. For me it's when the gran children came along...A second go at being in a world where children need you"

That is beautiful, as they say if you raise your kids you get to spoil your grandchildren, if you spoil your kids you have to raise your grandchildren.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"This week I applied for a job that I have wanted since I was a child.

I’ve gone through the first of many stages. Don’t know how far I will get but I am so proud of myself for gettijg over the mental block of not even considering applying in the past. A lifetime of people telling me “you can’t” did their job well. Until now. 🩷🎀"

That’s huge, when you listen to yourself, and give yourself what you need, great things happen, good luck.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"If looking at big moments that car crash life or just make you think from outside of your comfort, then its last year. I freed my wife to play and from that I reassed myself and if I had given her the life she deserved and the sex. In the end it was positive and brought us back very close. "

Absolutely, sometimes we can get so caught up in trying to hold onto someone, we don’t give them a chance to stay of their own accord, the old saying “if you love someone let them go” is still as true as it always has been.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"When hubby died 19 years ago. That put a lot of things into perspective."

I’m sorry for your loss, just know that love you shared will never sour (hugs)

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By *ealitybitesMan
7 days ago

Belfast

I had a couple of life changing and life affirming experiences just before turning 50 that flipped my entire outlook and attitude on its head.

For the entirety of my 40s I knew I had to appreciate myself more but just couldn't do it and those experiences gave me the strength to do so.

It hasn't been perfect but at least I'm looking out for me just as much as I do for others.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
7 days ago

East Sussex

I thought maybe when my mum died it would be life changing but it wasn't. I wonder if when my dad dies it will be 🤔

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By *lectrictouchMan
7 days ago

inverarary

Many moments but loosing a very close friend changed my life

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By *reamingdeadMan
7 days ago

wigan


"Was the last time you really grew as a person?

Was it a passing comment from a random stranger that made you question your life choices?

Was it some idle Tuesday when a thought was the catalyst for change?

Or was it a major event that made you change your life and mindset?

For me it was the moment I realised that I had been trying to fix people instead of letting myself heal, that moment was the start of a 10 year evolution from a man who would let women walk all over me while I tried to help them only to resent myself when they eventually cheated on me.

I’ve come a long way in the last decade, my only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner."

Completed the national three peaks challenge at the weekend

Had to find a new level of determination to tap into in order to complete it. Especially on snowdon as the weather conditions were awful. Doing it for charity also pushed me on

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By *ohn 66Man
7 days ago

South Birmingham

A football injury when I was 25.

After realising I'd never get back to the (non-league) level I'd played at, I took a job abroad.

A whole new set of pathways opened up for me - some wonderful (some less so) but if I'd still been able to play football I would never have lived the life I've enjoyed so much.

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By *oxy-RedWoman
7 days ago

pink panther territory

I started to grow after the loss of my 7month old baby Grandaughter I'm March of last year, I stared to question my faith in God etc, I started thinking of my own immortality,I was always so laid back and happy never letting things get to me,I've always been a soft touch ,now I'm harder the soft touch shell had been shattered and I use humour to hide my feelings most of the time

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By *ortheastFarmerMan
7 days ago

Northumberland

Go back to 2019, when I was d*unk, trying to OD with codine and stood on the edge of a pier ready to jump.

2 female police officers trying to talk me down, 1 of them was new to the job as well. Ended up with RNLI, fire, ambulance and police all in attendance. It was my best mate who finally got me to see sense.

After that, the trip to hospital etc it occured to me just how fucked my head was, how ive just waisted so much essential services, like the ambulance, how ive not delt with my problems, instead tried to cover them with sex, alcohol and stupidity.

Got myself into rehab, got my life sorted out and got help.

That last day of rehab was a start of a new me. Its been hard, but im a way better person now, with a better mindset. Yeah I still suffer with mental health like ptsd, but I control it now, not let it control me.

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By *parkle1974Woman
7 days ago

Leeds

I had an epiphany a couple of weeks ago out of the blue. Since then I have never felt happier x

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By *2000ManMan
7 days ago

Worthing

When I left home. It was on good terms.

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By *eductiveSecretsWoman
7 days ago

Birmingham

I had to rediscover who I was after leaving a situation that destroyed every part of me for 16 years. Personal growth is ongoing as you never know when the next trigger or setback will happen, but I do know the person I am today took a lot of healing and self reflection that im grateful for.

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By *ommymaxMan
7 days ago

Leigh

When i was massively out my comfort zone and tbh had zero confidence in what i was doing, brought my self doubt up with a friend and they told me how complimentary people had been about me and how much they respected me and what i was doing

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By *vmarisaTV/TS
7 days ago

Motherwell

After discovering the power a TV like me can hold over men (and some women too) after my most recent relationship I realised that I have been unconsciously trying to fix others broken lives and that this is something I should not be doing. Also I am evolving once more and changing my sexuality,gradually and eventually I will no longer be non binary and a true bisexual going into the final chapter of my life, but I will always try to help people it's just my nature. Mx 👿

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By (user no longer on site)
7 days ago

I’ve been on something of a journey of growth and discovery the past 2-3 years, had some difficult times in my personal life at the beginning of that time which made me look at myself and really think about who I was and who I wanted to be which at first were questions that I really struggled to answer - I’m doing great now and still trying to grow and make good decisions each day. Turning 40 this year was also another moment where I really thought about where I am in life and where I want to be etc as well

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
7 days ago

Leeds

Question my life choices? Why are you supposed to do that sort of thing 🤷🏻‍♂️

The mr

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By *uaveNightsMan
7 days ago

Canvey Island

I think it was 2 years of health anxiety, getting out of an abusive relationship and then cancer scare.

Those three events changed who I am as a person, forced me to take a look within and work on myself. I’d like to think I’m starting to see the fruits of that labour now.

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By *WB85Man
7 days ago

Staffordshire

I had what I call a blip in my life a few years back that massively impacted my mental health.

Triggered by my stressful work life and a personal situation that occurred....just pushed me over the edge.

I'm in a far better place this last 12 months or so now, but occasionally I hit a rough patch.

Now I have to know when something is wrong for me be able to walk away from it.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"Go back to 2019, when I was d*unk, trying to OD with codine and stood on the edge of a pier ready to jump.

2 female police officers trying to talk me down, 1 of them was new to the job as well. Ended up with RNLI, fire, ambulance and police all in attendance. It was my best mate who finally got me to see sense.

After that, the trip to hospital etc it occured to me just how fucked my head was, how ive just waisted so much essential services, like the ambulance, how ive not delt with my problems, instead tried to cover them with sex, alcohol and stupidity.

Got myself into rehab, got my life sorted out and got help.

That last day of rehab was a start of a new me. Its been hard, but im a way better person now, with a better mindset. Yeah I still suffer with mental health like ptsd, but I control it now, not let it control me. "

Well the fact that you’re still here is proof that it wasn’t a waste of, you’re alive and the world is better for it.

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington


"After discovering the power a TV like me can hold over men (and some women too) after my most recent relationship I realised that I have been unconsciously trying to fix others broken lives and that this is something I should not be doing. Also I am evolving once more and changing my sexuality,gradually and eventually I will no longer be non binary and a true bisexual going into the final chapter of my life, but I will always try to help people it's just my nature. Mx 👿"

This exactly

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By *ate2theparty808 OP   Man
7 days ago

Erdington

I’m genuinely touched by some of your comments, there’s a lot of bravery out there, you’re a very inspirational bunch

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