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the prefect day:)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

THE PERFECT DAY FOR HER…

8:15 Wake up to hugs and kisses

8:30 Weigh-in 2 kgs lighter than yesterday

8:45 Breakfast in bed—freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants; open presents- expensive jewellery chosen by thoughtful partner

9:15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil

10:00 Light work-out at club with sexy, funny personal trainer

10:30 Facial, manicure, makeup application, shampoo, condition, blow wave

12:00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor café

12:45 Catch sight of partner’s ex and notice that she has gained 17 kgs

1:00 Shopping with friends: unlimited credit

3:00 Nap

4:00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist; card is from secret admirer

4:15 Massage from strong but gentle hunk—says he rarely gets to work on such a perfect body

5:30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe

7:30 Candlelit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments received from other diners/ dancers

10:00 Hot shower- alone

10:50 Carried to bed… freshly ironed, crisp, white linen

11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling

11:15 Fall asleep in his big, strong arms

THE PERFECT DAY FOR HIM…

6:00 Alarm

6:15 Blow job

6:30 Massive, satisfying shit while reading the sports section

7:00 Breakfast—steak and eggs, coffee and toast—all cooked by naked, buxom wench who bends over a lot

7:30 Limo arrives

7:45 Several beers on route to the airport

9:15 Flight in personal Lear jet

9:30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job on-route)

9:45 Play front nine (2 under par)

11:45 Lunch—steak and lobster, 3 beers and bottle of Dom Perignon

12:15 Blow job

12:30 Another Blow job

2:15 Limo back to airport (several bourbons)

2:30 Fly to Bahamas

3:30 Late afternoon fishing expedition with all-female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot

4:30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs)—on light tackle

5:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle MacPherson (bending over, naturally)

6:45 shit, shower and shave

7:00 Watch news—Michael Jackson assassinated

7:30 Dinner—lobster appetisers, Dom Perignon (1953), big juicy

fillet steak followed by ice cream served on a big pair of tits

9:00 Napoleon Brandy and Habanos cigars in front of wall-sized TV

as you watch football game

9:30 Sex with three women, all with lesbian tendencies

11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing beer

11:30 Night-cap blow job

11:45 In bed alone

11:50 A 22-second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room

11:51 Laugh yourself to sleep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hate to break this remarkable piece of cut and paste but Michael Jackson is already dead.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

i know it just made me laugh when i read it so i though i would share :P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooooooooooooops I missed a bit out ...... I missed the FOR HER bit at the top and started reading, then glanced at the username and saw MAN and thought ...... fuck he's not into women ........ and lost interest

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