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"What's THE worst sex you have ever had? " You can’t name people in the forums unfortunately OP  | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life" Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? " I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever | |||
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"With my ex. Lie on my right...two minutes max, then he'd roll over fart and go to sleep...so predictable and never changed" We said we'd keep that between us! 😭 | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her " You mean she died | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her " You mean this isn’t what we’re meant to do? Damn! | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean she died" Best comment this week. 👏🤣 | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean she died" If he’s already inside her before she died is it ok to still finish? | |||
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"I don't think I've ever had really bad sex.. x" You must pick your partners really well, almost a superpower in this day and age. 👏 | |||
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"I don't think I've ever had really bad sex.. x You must pick your partners really well, almost a superpower in this day and age. 👏" I am quite picky to be fair | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean she died If he’s already inside her before she died is it ok to still finish? " Quagmire says giggity. | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever "Yeah? Have you tried fucking a wet lettuce? Cheeky Mare! You woz gagging for it, darlin’ Best 23 mins of your life 
They don’t call me thrust weapon love missile for note ya know  | |||
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"I don't think I've ever had really bad sex.. x You must pick your partners really well, almost a superpower in this day and age. 👏 I am quite picky to be fair "I'm imagining a thorough selection process culminating in a single question: Is our meeting going to end up being mentioned on the worst sex thread on fab? | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever
Yeah? Have you tried fucking a wet lettuce?
Cheeky Mare! You woz gagging for it, darlin’
Best 23 mins of your life
They don’t call me thrust weapon love missile for note ya know "you mean the worst 23 seconds of my life | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever
Yeah? Have you tried fucking a wet lettuce?
Cheeky Mare! You woz gagging for it, darlin’
Best 23 mins of your life
They don’t call me thrust weapon love missile for note ya know you mean the worst 23 seconds of my life"Didn't expect to see time dilation in the fab forums... | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever
Yeah? Have you tried fucking a wet lettuce?
Cheeky Mare! You woz gagging for it, darlin’
Best 23 mins of your life
They don’t call me thrust weapon love missile for note ya know you mean the worst 23 seconds of my life
Didn't expect to see time dilation in the fab forums... "It wasn’t the only thing dilated | |||
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"It was with a guy called Brightonsteve worse shag of my life Boooooo BrightonSteve! Was he even from Brighton? I think so but it doesn't really matter he was the shittest shag ever
Yeah? Have you tried fucking a wet lettuce?
Cheeky Mare! You woz gagging for it, darlin’
Best 23 mins of your life
They don’t call me thrust weapon love missile for note ya know you mean the worst 23 seconds of my life
Didn't expect to see time dilation in the fab forums...
It wasn’t the only thing dilated "Made me laugh, thank you 🤣 | |||
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"Seriously I had a guy who was 10 years younger than me ( this is many years ago) no forplay and he shagged me for about five minutes got off and told me he was knackered. That is the worst shag ive ever had" He sounds like my hero 🙌🙌 | |||
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"Not sure it was actually the sax or how it made me feel but I had sex with a guy once who made really weird noises like high pitched squeeling. So it was really awkward and made me laugh and feel weird." Did you buy any chance have your high heel wedged in his scrotum? Might explain the high pitch 🤷🏽♂️ | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 26/03/26 21:52:13]" I always laugh at my own jokes  i have to - no one else does. | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean she died" Or died laughing after seeing his willy 🤷🏽♂️ | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean this isn’t what we’re meant to do? Damn! " You can do that with me, just wait for me to roll over and fart... 😂 | |||
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"There was this one time where he plonked me on his willy, lay back and expected me to do the work. Never again "Your fault for being so plonkable tbf | |||
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"Was with a girl years ago who closed her eyes and just laid there no interaction or anything from her You mean she died If he’s already inside her before she died is it ok to still finish? " It'd be rude not to, no? 🤔 | |||
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"Seriously I had a guy who was 10 years younger than me ( this is many years ago) no forplay and he shagged me for about five minutes got off and told me he was knackered. That is the worst shag ive ever had" At least you got 5 mins of action, woman above got 2 mins and a fart 🤷🏽♂️ | |||
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"There was this one time where he plonked me on his willy, lay back and expected me to do the work. Never again "Sounds like you missed a bit in the job description when hiring him... Pillow princess, you need to move your ass for me to enjoy... | |||
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"His (22) profile said 175cm but he was 160....anyway we did it bc he was handsome but he came in a minute and since then I feels like i had sex with a c***d 😫 I will never get it out of my mind!..." 😬😬😬 I don't know why people lie about their height like it won't get found out in person. Highly odd. | |||
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"Don't think I've had a bad sexual experience. A funny one was when a lady I fucked kept yelping like a small dog. I couldn't stop laughing, my mate was in the room next door, and I could hear him laughing like a drain. It was quite off-putting. I still see her around and she's known as chihuahua. " Every now and then a comment on the forum makes me laugh audibly, and your last phrase did it. Fucking hell 😂 | |||
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"He was like Will from The Inbetweeners 😬 Sadly this wasn't that long ago, and he definitely wasn't a teenager. " Were there any signs of such prowess before the act? | |||
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"I had a guy who used to washing machine my boobs (twist the side to side) and came within like 30 seconds everytime! " 😂😂😂 Please can we see a visual demonstration? | |||
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"Mine was a few weeks ago, got thumbed...then had my clit rubbed so hard it was filed down to nothing. " 😂 I remember you telling me about this. | |||
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"Mine was a few weeks ago, got thumbed...then had my clit rubbed so hard it was filed down to nothing. " SmoothClit™ - the ultimate in aerodynamics. | |||
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"Mine was a few weeks ago, got thumbed...then had my clit rubbed so hard it was filed down to nothing. 😂 I remember you telling me about this. " Lmao its forever burned into my memory 😂 | |||
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"A guy talked all that and then jizzed on my boobs in 3 seconds in a carpark I had to sacrifice a dress I can laugh now but i was really fucked off " That's what you get for living in a tax haven 😂 | |||
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"There was a woman I was trying to get in to for a while. Flirting etc for a few weeks in the pub. One night she was locked out so I offered to break in, she said she could afford a new window or door so can she stay at mine. I was being a gentleman, gave her a top to sleep in. Then in bed she kissed me, so I played her made her cum then started fucking her but she just layed there letting out little moans and breathing heavy. I ended up banging her again in the morning but it was the same. I didn't do it again after. " I'd have tried a third time, just to make sure 😂 | |||
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"There was a woman I was trying to get in to for a while. Flirting etc for a few weeks in the pub. One night she was locked out so I offered to break in, she said she could afford a new window or door so can she stay at mine. I was being a gentleman, gave her a top to sleep in. Then in bed she kissed me, so I played her made her cum then started fucking her but she just layed there letting out little moans and breathing heavy. I ended up banging her again in the morning but it was the same. I didn't do it again after. I'd have tried a third time, just to make sure 😂" Nah I got fed up of doing all the graft. Took ages to nut as well. She left with two loads lol she went to her mum's to get the spare key. See her a few weeks later but just chatted like normal. | |||
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"My first husband was pretty shite TBF 🤷🏼 " Lol.. | |||
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"A guy I met off here had the smallest penis I have ever ever seen. Even when hard I'd say it would be lucky if it was 2 inches, so sadly the sex for me was just so awkward and so awful. Never saw him again "Wow. He was definitely wasted on you  | |||
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"My first husband was pretty shite TBF 🤷🏼 " Is that why you're now making up for it with the bf? 😁 | |||
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"During a shibari session, I was having sex with a friend, and we wanted to try to make her have a vaginal orgasm and a clitoral orgasm one after the other. But at the moment she was about to come, her 8-year-old daughter walked into the bedroom with sandwiches because she heard her mom screaming and thought she was hungry. Right as she stood in the doorway, with her mother holding my dick, I came directly toward the child." 🤣🤣🤣 That's so wrong and so funny | |||
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"There was this one time where he plonked me on his willy, lay back and expected me to do the work. Never again "Plonked me on his willy! Love it. 'Here, love, sit on it' - what a picture! | |||
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"A guy I met off here had the smallest penis I have ever ever seen. Even when hard I'd say it would be lucky if it was 2 inches, so sadly the sex for me was just so awkward and so awful. Never saw him again "2 inches? How did you know he was erect?!  | |||
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