FabSwingers.com forum: The random things you think about.

By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

I’ve just had the random thought of……..

If you use spunk as wall paper paste, do you have to paste the paper or can you paste the wall.

I worry about myself sometimes.

Any random thoughts from you folks?

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By *etwife8230Couple
12 weeks ago

Newport

How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time?

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By *kphooey43Man
12 weeks ago

Barnet

If your son sticks boggies to his bedroom wall, can you paint over it so that it appears like woodchip?

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
12 weeks ago

Gloucestershire

How many FAF messages can I send before I run out of messages.

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By *utsackerMan
12 weeks ago

north east

"If your son sticks boggies to his bedroom wall, can you paint over it so that it appears like woodchip?"

Haha unfortunately yes you can a place I worked years back some dirty bastard used to wipe snots on the toilet wall and they just got painted over

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By *iesel74Man
12 weeks ago

Belfast

Pasted the wall once by accident when I ‘overshot’

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time? "

I have one of those little decorating buckets.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"How many FAF messages can I send before I run out of messages. "

Or run out of people who haven’t blocked you.

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By *earditallWoman
12 weeks ago

Lancaster

Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more

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By *jslookingforfunMan
12 weeks ago

liverpool

"Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more "

And did you

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more "

Would you drink any fluids whilst eating the 5 ponds of spuds. I’m saying you must do.

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By *earditallWoman
12 weeks ago

Lancaster

"Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more

And did you "

I don't know i don't like spuds that much

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By *earditallWoman
12 weeks ago

Lancaster

"Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more

Would you drink any fluids whilst eating the 5 ponds of spuds. I’m saying you must do. "

Probably

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By *ookingforfun9970Man
12 weeks ago

bh20

Who’s the person employed to fart in packets of ham and how did they get that job ?

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Noone wants the random thoughts in my head.

But now I'm thinking probably best to do the wall,easier aim and quicker spreading.

I did once wonder if I ate 5lb of potatoes would I instantly weigh 5lb more

Would you drink any fluids whilst eating the 5 ponds of spuds. I’m saying you must do.

Probably"

And the thought of tattie water brings us back to the wallpaper paradox.

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By *ild_oatsMan
12 weeks ago

the land of saints & sinners

"How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time? "

Let’s do the maths on this….

The average sized room needs an average of 8 rolls of wallpaper depending on length and pattern repeat. For which you will need approximately 9 litres of wallpaper paper paste.

A man on average produces 3.125 ml of seamen per ejaculation.

If you could produce a consistent amount of ejaculate you would need 2880 cum shots for 9 litres.

If you could do this once every 2 minutes it would take you 5760 minutes to produce 9 litres.

Or that’s exactly 4 days going at it non stop.

The more mates you have joining you in this endeavour the quicker it will take.

You will also need to also factor in refreshment and comfort breaks.

Anaglypta and textured wallpapers need a lot more adhesive.

Though you might need a visit to a physio after all that effort.

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By *he Silver FuxMan
12 weeks ago

Utero

I think… why the fuck am I reading this post? What could I tackle next on my top 1000 priorities that a normal person would do instead of this…

What’s wrong with me… us?

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By *hisIsMe58Man
12 weeks ago

Winchester

I had a childish random thought that I would like to go round and add an I to To Let signs so they all spelt toilet.

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By *earditallWoman
12 weeks ago

Lancaster

"I had a childish random thought that I would like to go round and add an I to To Let signs so they all spelt toilet."

Googly eyes to random things in supermarkets is quite fun

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By *ittlebirdWoman
12 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

"I had a childish random thought that I would like to go round and add an I to To Let signs so they all spelt toilet."

Weirdly I did this as a teenager. Made me laugh a lot

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By *ertcoupleCouple
12 weeks ago

Welwyn Garden City

How does the person who drives the snowplough get to work

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"How does the person who drives the snowplough get to work

He gets a lift from the other guy that drives the snowplough.

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By *icky TVTV/TS
12 weeks ago

Doncaster

Why can’t humans lick their elbows

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
12 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

"How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time?

Let’s do the maths on this….

The average sized room needs an average of 8 rolls of wallpaper depending on length and pattern repeat. For which you will need approximately 9 litres of wallpaper paper paste.

A man on average produces 3.125 ml of seamen per ejaculation.

If you could produce a consistent amount of ejaculate you would need 2880 cum shots for 9 litres.

If you could do this once every 2 minutes it would take you 5760 minutes to produce 9 litres.

Or that’s exactly 4 days going at it non stop.

The more mates you have joining you in this endeavour the quicker it will take.

You will also need to also factor in refreshment and comfort breaks.

Anaglypta and textured wallpapers need a lot more adhesive.

Though you might need a visit to a physio after all that effort."

You have a lot of time on your hands don’t you.

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By *vmarisaTV/TS
12 weeks ago

Motherwell

I often muse on pogo sticking races being included in the Olympics and then an Arab state buys into them and global pogo stick players are traded for gazillions of pounds, dollars , gold , rare earth minerals...etc

Mx 👿

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By (user no longer on site)
12 weeks ago

If a dog and a horse had a swimming race which one would be fastest?

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By *ustus5555Woman
12 weeks ago

Nottingham

Was shopping yesterday for doggy treats and a few other bits when hubby asked. If the apocalypse happens and food is short, how long would it be before you ate the bacon dog treats. Wtf.

I worry about him at times.

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By *igerFiestaMan
12 weeks ago

Huddersfield

Was bored at work yesterday and was thinking about a scene from Carry On at your convenience. The gang go on a workers outing to Brighton in May 1971. They arrived at noon and left at 6.30pm. We saw the gang have fun on the Palace pier for about 20 minutes and they carry armfuls of prizes that they won. The film suddenly skips 6 hours and see them get back on the coach still holding their prizes. I spent the entire lunch break pondering what on earth they did in Brighton for the remainder 6 hours before their coach left. Any ideas? What would a coach trip of workers do for one day in Brighton in May 1971?

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By *vaRoseWoman
12 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork

"Who’s the person employed to fart in packets of ham and how did they get that job ?"

🤣🤣

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By *annaPlayABCCouple
12 weeks ago

Bacup

If our bodies had been made slightly differently nose wise as in upside down and our nostrils were on top would we be in danger of drowning in a downpour ??

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By *ilithnyxWoman
12 weeks ago

A vast cosmic void

Why are teeth fine when intact, inside a mouth but as soon as it comes out it's just a bit creepy.

Also, what happens to all the teeth in the world once they've come out? Can they decompose over time or do they just stay there...for always?!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
12 weeks ago

Leeds

Do penguins ever feel cold? Would they benefit from some knitted apparel?

Mrs

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By *he Desired EffectMan
12 weeks ago

London

"Why are teeth fine when intact, inside a mouth but as soon as it comes out it's just a bit creepy.

Also, what happens to all the teeth in the world once they've come out? Can they decompose over time or do they just stay there...for always?!"

The fairies collect them, don't you know? 🫢

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By *ung nine inchMan
12 weeks ago

leeds

Fucking my sister inlaw

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By *inkyukxxxCouple
12 weeks ago

Nottinghamshire

"I’ve just had the random thought of……..

If you use spunk as wall paper paste, do you have to paste the paper or can you paste the wall.

I worry about myself sometimes.

Any random thoughts from you folks?"

It would take a while though 🤣

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By *onnachakeaneMan
12 weeks ago

Dundrum

How big is a Trillion?

Go back in time by the following second units of time,

* A million seconds = 19 Jan 26

* A billion seconds = 25 May 94

* A trillion seconds = 29, 662 BC

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By (user no longer on site)
12 weeks ago

I've watched enough crime documentaries, I'm pretty sure i could get away with murder.

I've planned so many in my head.

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By *imdrake1324Man
12 weeks ago

smethwick

"I've watched enough crime documentaries, I'm pretty sure i could get away with murder.

I've planned so many in my head. "

Ok now i gotta know your plan

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By *carlettsWoman
12 weeks ago

Harpenden

"How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time?

Let’s do the maths on this….

The average sized room needs an average of 8 rolls of wallpaper depending on length and pattern repeat. For which you will need approximately 9 litres of wallpaper paper paste.

A man on average produces 3.125 ml of seamen per ejaculation.

If you could produce a consistent amount of ejaculate you would need 2880 cum shots for 9 litres.

If you could do this once every 2 minutes it would take you 5760 minutes to produce 9 litres.

Or that’s exactly 4 days going at it non stop.

The more mates you have joining you in this endeavour the quicker it will take.

You will also need to also factor in refreshment and comfort breaks.

Anaglypta and textured wallpapers need a lot more adhesive.

Though you might need a visit to a physio after all that effort."

Are you a maths teacher?

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By *jslookingforfunMan
12 weeks ago

liverpool

"I've watched enough crime documentaries, I'm pretty sure i could get away with murder.

I've planned so many in my head. "

Oh when the time finally comes and I need to deal with someone, the reading up on forensic books will really help. I’ve got a number of different plans

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By (user no longer on site)
12 weeks ago

Why did the chicken cross the road ?

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By *ilithnyxWoman
12 weeks ago

A vast cosmic void

"Why did the chicken cross the road ? "

I don't know, but do they have teeth??

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By *aughty driverMan
12 weeks ago

Romford

Wonder if the people that live across the road ever come out?

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By *etwife8230Couple
12 weeks ago

Newport

"Wonder if the people that live across the road ever come out? "

Best check on them 😉

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By *aughty driverMan
12 weeks ago

Romford

I did I even posted a Christmas card during Christmas. Maybe they only come out in the dead of the night

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By *ilithnyxWoman
12 weeks ago

A vast cosmic void

"Why are teeth fine when intact, inside a mouth but as soon as it comes out it's just a bit creepy.

Also, what happens to all the teeth in the world once they've come out? Can they decompose over time or do they just stay there...for always?!

The fairies collect them, don't you know? 🫢"

They do, and they were rubbish! Keeping them in a plastic kinder egg, in a drawer, only to be discovered by the previous owner of said contained teeth😨

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By *hitelotusMan
12 weeks ago

Farnborough

Going through my head : Hotwife + cuck husband + hotel + blindfold

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By *ild_oatsMan
12 weeks ago

the land of saints & sinners

"How much spank would you need for the wall though ,and would you collect over a period of time?

Let’s do the maths on this….

The average sized room needs an average of 8 rolls of wallpaper depending on length and pattern repeat. For which you will need approximately 9 litres of wallpaper paper paste.

A man on average produces 3.125 ml of seamen per ejaculation.

If you could produce a consistent amount of ejaculate you would need 2880 cum shots for 9 litres.

If you could do this once every 2 minutes it would take you 5760 minutes to produce 9 litres.

Or that’s exactly 4 days going at it non stop.

The more mates you have joining you in this endeavour the quicker it will take.

You will also need to also factor in refreshment and comfort breaks.

Anaglypta and textured wallpapers need a lot more adhesive.

Though you might need a visit to a physio after all that effort.

Are you a maths teacher?

No, but I like a good figure….. 🤣🤣🤣

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By *adyBugsWoman
12 weeks ago

not local even if it says I am

"I’ve just had the random thought of……..

If you use spunk as wall paper paste, do you have to paste the paper or can you paste the wall.

I worry about myself sometimes.

Any random thoughts from you folks?"

What flavour wall paper is it?

Will it match my curtains?

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