FabSwingers.com forum: bugger bugger bugger .......

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I now have to destroy the sofa to retrieve my ring ......................... aaaaaaaaarggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

Hmmm the words 'bugger' and 'ring' in the same thread.

I like it Minxie - I LIKE IT!!!

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

I'm not even gonna ask...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

Why do I visions ofan episode of 'James Herriott' ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

Why do I visions ofan episode of 'James Herriott' ?

I must have missed that one then ...... did he stuff his hand down a sofa?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!! "

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I now have to destroy the sofa to retrieve my ring ......................... aaaaaaaaarggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Was going to say, Lube, Lube, Lube...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My sides hurt from laughing lol please stop xx

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

Can just see the local news... A lady was seen running along Brighton Pier today screaming and wailing with a couch stuck on her arm. Emergency services were called and were familiar with the lady. Their spokesperson said "We were called to an incident this morning, to find a lady with her arm attached to a piece of furniture. We have been called to numerous incidents involving this lady, only last week we were called to remove a pan from her head after she had tripped over and landed in said cooking pot. We call these incidents as Operation Minxie Mayhem. Unfortunately, this wont be the last we see of Operation MM. The lady has been warned however, that if she even utters the phrase "Its beginning to look like" she will have an automatic asbo slapped on her, along with a smacked bottom".

The lady involved was last seen carrying her couch back home.

Click here for more Operation Minxie Mayhems Mishaps.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

Oh My God! Minxie's sofa is ALIVE!!!!

Why does this not surprise me..????

Ted

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I worked out after my arm was stuck it probably wasnt a good idea to try and retrieve whilst still sitting on the sofa ........... d'oh so got off with said arm still stuffed down it and that's when the springs decided to attack .......

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Put ........... who said anything about putting it there ..................... it jumped all by itself of course .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

The lady involved was last seen carrying her couch back home.

Click here for more Operation Minxie Mayhems Mishaps."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

Oh My God! Minxie's sofa is ALIVE!!!!

Why does this not surprise me..????

Ted"

because u have come across a sofa like mine before???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

oiiiiiiiiiiii do u think I am dense, big things don't go into little things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

"
Your ring?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

Oh My God! Minxie's sofa is ALIVE!!!!

Why does this not surprise me..????

Ted

because u have come across a sofa like mine before???

No. Because, just like in Harry Potter, things in the Minxie household are highly likely to NOT be quite what they seem......

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

Oh My God! Minxie's sofa is ALIVE!!!!

Why does this not surprise me..????

Ted

because u have come across a sofa like mine before???

No. Because, just like in Harry Potter, things in the Minxie household are highly likely to NOT be quite what they seem......

are u including me in that statement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

oiiiiiiiiiiii do u think I am dense, big things don't go into little things

I'd challenge you on that one actually, but I don't want to divert the attention of the thread away from your upholstery antics yet.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

Your ring?"

yeah my ring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

Oh My God! Minxie's sofa is ALIVE!!!!

Why does this not surprise me..????

Ted

because u have come across a sofa like mine before???

No. Because, just like in Harry Potter, things in the Minxie household are highly likely to NOT be quite what they seem......

are u including me in that statement

Only if you class yourself as a 'thing' sweetie... and I can't imagine that ever happening.....

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

Now that picture I d give a fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

oiiiiiiiiiiii do u think I am dense, big things don't go into little things

I'd challenge you on that one actually, but I don't want to divert the attention of the thread away from your upholstery antics yet.....

the last person that challenged me didnt look too happy to begin with ....... (pool) lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I ve got to ask,,

Why did you put your ring in the sofa,, ???

Could've been a hell of a lot worse!!

Could've put the sofa in her ring!!

oiiiiiiiiiiii do u think I am dense, big things don't go into little things

I'd challenge you on that one actually, but I don't want to divert the attention of the thread away from your upholstery antics yet.....

hold that thought then and tell me it later

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

I just wrote a fantastic piece (if I do say so) for your local paper.

I used my crystal ball as to what happens, try running down the seafront, I'm sure you'll get help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm avoiding inserting anything that could become stuck today!!

well I had a panic attack when the sofa springs grabbed my arm and wouldnt let go

I'm now having flashbacks to yesterday... Whatever you do minxie, relax and squat, that's what I did and it worked!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

Maybe not, but it'd make great telly! Just think, BBC South East might send Kaddie Lee-Preston down to report on it, then you'd be in for a REAL result!!!

(I'd pay good money for a ringside seat for that one!!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

I just wrote a fantastic piece (if I do say so) for your local paper.

I used my crystal ball as to what happens, try running down the seafront, I'm sure you'll get help

ok cut to the chase, did the crystal ball show exactly where in the sofa the ring is and do I get it out successfully without causing any harm to myself .... cos me thinks this might save a lot of blood sweat and tears if I know the outcome first

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

Maybe not, but it'd make great telly! Just think, BBC South East might send Kaddie Lee-Preston down to report on it, then you'd be in for a REAL result!!!

(I'd pay good money for a ringside seat for that one!!)

bugger even more ........ wiggles off to get dressed and put face on ........... the things one has to do for a normal life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

Maybe not, but it'd make great telly! Just think, BBC South East might send Kaddie Lee-Preston down to report on it, then you'd be in for a REAL result!!!

(I'd pay good money for a ringside seat for that one!!)

bugger even more ........ wiggles off to get dressed and put face on ........... the things one has to do for a normal life

*giggles at 'normal life'!!

Yeah - whatever Minxie!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

Maybe not, but it'd make great telly! Just think, BBC South East might send Kaddie Lee-Preston down to report on it, then you'd be in for a REAL result!!!

(I'd pay good money for a ringside seat for that one!!)

bugger even more ........ wiggles off to get dressed and put face on ........... the things one has to do for a normal life

*giggles at 'normal life'!!

Yeah - whatever Minxie!!

ok "normal" might have been stretching it a bit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you lot aren't helping too much - how am I gonna do this cos I can't wrestle the sofa by myself

I just wrote a fantastic piece (if I do say so) for your local paper.

I used my crystal ball as to what happens, try running down the seafront, I'm sure you'll get help

you may need the fire brigade's underground cameras minxie! Then Ted can get his hot BBC woman round!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

shall I have all the services on standby?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!! "

now that would be daft cos I wouldn't be able to see

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!! "

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!!

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

This is true!! I'm not sure you're quite at that stage!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!!

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

This is true!! I'm not sure you're quite at that stage!! "

phewwww that's a relief, although those hug me snuggly jackets do have a certain appeal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!!

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

This is true!! I'm not sure you're quite at that stage!!

phewwww that's a relief, although those hug me snuggly jackets do have a certain appeal

I'm calling Sussex police as we speak!!! Now minxie, those handcuffs aren't for tying the officers up!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"shall I have all the services on standby?

I'm not sure the police could help minxie! But definitely the other two. Whatever you do, don't stick a sauce pan on your head!!

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

This is true!! I'm not sure you're quite at that stage!!

phewwww that's a relief, although those hug me snuggly jackets do have a certain appeal

I'm calling Sussex police as we speak!!! Now minxie, those handcuffs aren't for tying the officers up!!!"

oooo go on loudspeaker so I can hear the call ............

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Have sent you a few hints on how to deconstruct a sofa so that it can go back together again afterwards.

I have every faith in your skills.

Just try not to lose any fingers cos you need them to add up with (hint hint did I win?

)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have sent you a few hints on how to deconstruct a sofa so that it can go back together again afterwards.

I have every faith in your skills.

Just try not to lose any fingers cos you need them to add up with (hint hint did I win?

I havent done any adding up yet ....... seem to have lost the abacus ........ maybe that's down the sofa too ...... and the way my pm's are going I am not gonna be looking at that thread anytime shortly ............. there's a lot of perverse people on here

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

At this moment lewes police hq have gone into action

and they have alerted the fire brigcade to bring lots of lube as the sight of minxie bent over the sofa they wont be able to hold back

just wondering if the coastguard should also be called

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have nothing to add to this thread

Apart from my avatar that is

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Don't laugh but ............... the police helicopter is hovering over where I live right now ................ ooooooooooo errrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have nothing to add to this thread

Apart from my avatar that is

wrong thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't laugh but ............... the police helicopter is hovering over where I live right now ................ ooooooooooo errrrrrrrrrrrrrr

sorry minxie! I decided you might need help

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Don't laugh but ............... the police helicopter is hovering over where I live right now ................ ooooooooooo errrrrrrrrrrrrrr

sorry minxie! I decided you might need help

just out of curiosity .......... where are they gonna land or are they all gonna abseil down their ropes??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't laugh but ............... the police helicopter is hovering over where I live right now ................ ooooooooooo errrrrrrrrrrrrrr

sorry minxie! I decided you might need help

just out of curiosity .......... where are they gonna land or are they all gonna abseil down their ropes??

yep, its the SAS!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Don't laugh but ............... the police helicopter is hovering over where I live right now ................ ooooooooooo errrrrrrrrrrrrrr

sorry minxie! I decided you might need help

just out of curiosity .......... where are they gonna land or are they all gonna abseil down their ropes??

yep, its the SAS!! Lol"

ooooooo decisions decisions, to get dressed or not ........ hmmmmm

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

Well, yes they do, but there also has to be a Doctor too, who has to assess your mental capabilities?

By the sounds of this, he'd have to give up all hope of ever getting you anywhere near the funny farm.

You're too far gone, even for them!

Reference the sofa, why not turn it over upside down and see if the ring might slip out all on its own???

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

Well, yes they do, but there also has to be a Doctor too, who has to assess your mental capabilities?

By the sounds of this, he'd have to give up all hope of ever getting you anywhere near the funny farm.

You're too far gone, even for them!

Reference the sofa, why not turn it over upside down and see if the ring might slip out all on its own???"

just out of curiosity and not having thought about this tooo much ......... where would it slip out from?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And my arm and hand nearly got stuck tooo ........... as it was inserted beyond my wrist ........

The lady involved was last seen carrying her couch back home.

Click here for more Operation Minxie Mayhems Mishaps."

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

Well, yes they do, but there also has to be a Doctor too, who has to assess your mental capabilities?

By the sounds of this, he'd have to give up all hope of ever getting you anywhere near the funny farm.

You're too far gone, even for them!

Reference the sofa, why not turn it over upside down and see if the ring might slip out all on its own???

just out of curiosity and not having thought about this tooo much ......... where would it slip out from?

Well, if you up-ended the sofa nearest the end where the ring is reckoned to be and shake or rock the sofa to try and dislodge the ring down to the end, then turn the furniture upside down!

Simples.

If it works, you can say it is a case of SOFA, SO GOOD!

Sorry, couldn't resist it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I thought the police had to be there so someone could be sectioned lol

Well, yes they do, but there also has to be a Doctor too, who has to assess your mental capabilities?

By the sounds of this, he'd have to give up all hope of ever getting you anywhere near the funny farm.

You're too far gone, even for them!

Reference the sofa, why not turn it over upside down and see if the ring might slip out all on its own???

just out of curiosity and not having thought about this tooo much ......... where would it slip out from?

Well, if you up-ended the sofa nearest the end where the ring is reckoned to be and shake or rock the sofa to try and dislodge the ring down to the end, then turn the furniture upside down!

Simples.

If it works, you can say it is a case of SOFA, SO GOOD!

Sorry, couldn't resist it!

that won't work, it only went down the side cos I was sitting on it at the same time - hence the springs were contracted, and as I went to grab the ring it went further down into oblivion

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By *taffsfella1Man
over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme

How about attaching a filter (eg an old pair of tights) to the end of your vacuum cleaner attachment and see if you can suck it out?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about attaching a filter (eg an old pair of tights) to the end of your vacuum cleaner attachment and see if you can suck it out?"

cos I don't think I can get the hoover nozzle down there

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"How about attaching a filter (eg an old pair of tights) to the end of your vacuum cleaner attachment and see if you can suck it out?

cos I don't think I can get the hoover nozzle down there

Follow the guidance I sent you earlier and throw this into the mix too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I now have to destroy the sofa to retrieve my ring ......................... aaaaaaaaarggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I went down back of my sofa last night to find a doughnut i seem to have lost !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

whoooooooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooooooo I have done it ......................... how clever am I ............. the ring is now back on my finger ............... it had got trapped in the hessian underneath the sofa and I managed to wiggle it out without removing any of the staples ..... and I had the staple gun on standby as well lol

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

"whoooooooooooooooooo hoooooooooooooooooo I have done it ......................... how clever am I ............. the ring is now back on my finger ............... it had got trapped in the hessian underneath the sofa and I managed to wiggle it out without removing any of the staples ..... and I had the staple gun on standby as well lol

OK Folks!

Sussex Fire and Rescue Service, Sussex Police, the Coastguard, Brighton Town Council, The Red Cross & International Rescue ("Thunderbirds are go!") plus all the hundreds of other potential rescuers can all stand down!

The emergency is over!

"Nothing to see folks, move along please!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put it down, now, and slowly back away !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

MINXI!!!!!!!! PUT.... THE STAPLE GUN..... DOWN!!!!

(Gutted I won't get to see you gettin it on with Kaddie now.... DAMN!!!!!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am crying with laughter here

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

You need to put one of those West Indian plastic covers on the sofa now - nothing can slip down there again with one of those on. Your legs will get stuck to the plastic in warm weather and it will look awful but you need to practice safe sofa.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

Couldn't arf have some fun rolling down Ditchling Beacon with that wrapped round ya, Minxie

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

Couldn't arf have some fun rolling down Ditchling Beacon with that wrapped round ya, Minxie

just that and nothing else on?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

Couldn't arf have some fun rolling down Ditchling Beacon with that wrapped round ya, Minxie

just that and nothing else on?

Eeeeeeuuuuuw!!

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

I did that for an ex many years ago - it doesn't help in the long run as going to the loo becomes hazardous.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"wouldn't it be easier to just wrap myself in the bubble wrap and practice "safe Minxie"? lol

Couldn't arf have some fun rolling down Ditchling Beacon with that wrapped round ya, Minxie

just that and nothing else on?

Eeeeeeuuuuuw!!

lol I am not that silly, pop all the bubbles then it gets painful

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