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"My girlfriend has a male lover off FAB we have met together and several times on her own. When she returns I ask if she has had a good evening and she replies he is amazing. When I have asked do you love him she says yes but not as much as you. She has said she would like to go away with him for a long weekend to a nice hotel spa and he wines, dines and makes love to her all weekend. What are your thoughts on this scenario ?" that's gone too far. That's not reasonable IMO, but depends how you feel about it all? | |||
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 & no interest in feelings for others.
But weāve done similar to what youāre doing with other partners. | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her?" She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦" Do you ever go away for weekends together? | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? " Most weekends | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends " What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? " I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. | |||
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"Get her to send you pics and vids " She always does | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought." I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't. | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't. " Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't. Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries " Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her... Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings... | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't. Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her... Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings..." Wise words and we do discuss both our feelings in depth tbh. Guess we like to push the envelope a little more than most | |||
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"Id never choose any of this but it's no one else's business but your two selves. Dont be letting the WWW guide you. My view is it's a car crash of your own design. You get to pick the speed and enjoy the view. Wise 7words x Good luck." | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought." Does she like you having your own freedom if the shoe was on the other foot what would her reaction be | |||
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"How would she feel about you going away for the weekend with someone you love but not as much as her? She admits it would be hard for her to accept but whatās good for the goose ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ Do you ever go away for weekends together? Most weekends What are your thoughts on her going away for the weekend? I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. I like her to have the freedom to make her own choices and I like to see her enjoy herself. Therefore I am ok with her going. I just wondered what other people in the lifestyle thought. I think it's one of those things you either get or you don't. Yes I agree, not for everyone but we like to explore our boundaries Just sat and read through this and I don't know. Op sounds a bit one sided it would be hard for her to accept you going away but perfectly okay for her... Sounds like you 2 need to have a honest sit down and talk because if there is any doubts before she goes its going to fester 100X worse while shes away and you guys sound like you have an amazing relationship otherwise so dont chuck it away by disregarding one partners feelings..." Totally agree seems a little one sided... | |||
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"Id never choose any of this but it's no one else's business but your two selves. Dont be letting the WWW guide you. My view is it's a car crash of your own design. You get to pick the speed and enjoy the view. Good luck." I wonāt be guided by the www I just wanted to see what otherās opinions were x | |||
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"Sounds to me like sheās poly. Are you op? If not are you ok to be the monogamous partner to a polyamorous girlfriend? Personally I donāt like the hierarchy of loving one more than the other but Iām going to give the benefit of the doubt here that this is new to you all and older monogamous societal expectations are in play here. Love is love. Itās not a finite resource. Her loving someone else doesnāt mean that thereās less love for you. Itās not a pizza that now has to be shared. " Yes we are both poly and Iām happy for her to love another guy but I never share my pizza š | |||
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"My wife has several lovers like this that she loves. We have an open marriage and are both very happy" She has a few lovers also and we have a 100% honesty policy between us which works for us too | |||
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" Yes we are both poly and Iām happy for her to love another guy but I never share my pizza š " It's far easier to pick up another pizza than a partner | |||
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" I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. " Do you mean you trust her not to leave you for the other man she loves, or something else ? | |||
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" Love is love. Itās not a finite resource. Her loving someone else doesnāt mean that thereās less love for you. " This is the best answer on this thread. | |||
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"So she lives with you, shares the bills and running of the house and she has a lover for the extra sex and affection she needs, š¤Ŗ What could possibly go wrong during a weekend of romance with him š¤Ŗš¤Ŗ" Wrong on every count ! But feel free to assume you know all and understand our dynamic  | |||
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" I trust her implicitly and we have 100% open honesty between us. Do you mean you trust her not to leave you for the other man she loves, or something else ?" I trust her to tell me anything If she wanted to leave she would leave regardless | |||
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"Is there a possibility she is hinting at you to try and stop her? Perhaps she wants you to show how much you care by saying "no" once in a while?" I am her boyfriend not her owner, why would I assume if I said no she shouldnāt go ? | |||
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"My girlfriend has a male lover off FAB we have met together and several times on her own. When she returns I ask if she has had a good evening and she replies he is amazing. When I have asked do you love him she says yes but not as much as you. So if 99% of the people questioned said yes do it and you wasnt happy would you let her do it ?? She has said she would like to go away with him for a long weekend to a nice hotel spa and he wines, dines and makes love to her all weekend. What are your thoughts on this scenario ?" | |||
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" Yes we are both poly and Iām happy for her to love another guy but I never share my pizza š It's far easier to pick up another pizza than a partner" Do you think I might lose my partner ? | |||
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"The fact you're asking this possibly suggests to me, you maybe aren't so sure..." Yep. What she said. ā¬ļø | |||
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided. I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too. " I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing | |||
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided. I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too. I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing " And weirdly enough i didn't say for him to go and meet others for sex. I said for him to go out and enjoy himself with weekends away too, that could be with anyone he chooses. | |||
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"Ruth has a b/f of whom she is very fond. I have met the guy many times. They occasionally go away for a weekend together and it works very well for us. It is entirely possible to love more than one person at the time, itās not exclusive. I am confident enough in our primary relationship that she will always come back but if she chose not to and chose him over me then that is where she should be. Who am I to get in the way of her happiness? If her feelings for him were stronger than for us then it would not work if I tried to hold her back. " Hooray !!!!!!! Someone that gets it š | |||
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"From what you describe, it all sounds very one sided. I think you need to start booking in weekends away, with people you'd like to spend time with, and go and enjoy yourself more too. I don't think it has to be tit for tat...there's lots of couples where only one half has sex with others as that's their thing And weirdly enough i didn't say for him to go and meet others for sex. I said for him to go out and enjoy himself with weekends away too, that could be with anyone he chooses. " I can assure you I do everything in life I want to, Iām really lucky and if I wasnāt happy Iād change it | |||
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"The fact you're asking this possibly suggests to me, you maybe aren't so sure... Yep. What she said. ā¬ļø" Way off the mark but thanks for your opinion | |||
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Mrs TMN x | |||
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"Iām not sure what youāre looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision? Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If youāre all happy and nobodyās getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x"Not heard of enm Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario Am I wrong to post ? Seems thereās interest in the subject Thanks for your input x | |||
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"Iām not sure what youāre looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision? Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If youāre all happy and nobodyās getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x
Not heard of enm
Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario
Am I wrong to post ?
Seems thereās interest in the subject
Thanks for your input x"No of course youāre not wrong to post, just wondered what difference other peopleās opinions would make to you. ENM means ethically non monogamous. | |||
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"Iām not sure what youāre looking for with your post, OP? Affirmation or derision? Every couple who is ENM does things in a different way. If youāre all happy and nobodyās getting hurt, go for it
Mrs TMN x
Not heard of enm
Not after affirmation or derision just curiosity as to what other people in this lifestyle thinks of the scenario
Am I wrong to post ?
Seems thereās interest in the subject
Thanks for your input x
No of course youāre not wrong to post, just wondered what difference other peopleās opinions would make to you. ENM means ethically non monogamous. "Other peoples opinions will make no difference to me whatsoever tbh Iām 62 have everything I want in life and I donāt mean monitory things Yes Iāve googled enm, probably sums us up Who knew were ENM š | |||
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"You have a great profile and the photos on it suggest you have a fun, fantastic lifestyle. Only you two will know if thereās any jeopardy in the relationship with the third." Thereās a risk in everything we do in life and we are fully aware of them We enjoy pushing our limits together and the different motions that come with it Thanks for the compliments x | |||
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