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Opinon: Pride Marches Aren't The Way Forward To Tackle Homophobia

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By *emenLover111 OP   Man
45 weeks ago

Sheffield (East Midlands)

I don't think pride marches do us homosexual gentlemen and bisexual gentlemen any favours to be honest. Painting a rainbow flag on our faces, I don't think it will stop the verbal and physical abuse we receive on a regular basis (and yes we do receive it, just because you don't see it, doesn't mean we don't experience it).

There will sadly always be narrowminded people who hate us for being who we are. We cannot change people's way of thinking.

What we can and should do is command respect and not tolerate any abuse or discrimination. We need to take a firm stance in instances of homophobia and use our protected rights to get law enforcement to prosecute offenders. We need to train ourselves in self defence so that people know not to give us abuse.

That is a better way forward than parading through the streets on a float.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Pride is protest. Historically.

It’s resistance. I think pride does great things.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Seeing queer people openly and proudly living their truth and existing happily is so powerful. Don’t underestimate the strength it takes and the power that comes from it. Pride can exist along other things to tackle homophobia and transphobia and racism.

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By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh


"Pride is protest. Historically.

It’s resistance. I think pride does great things. "

I agree! If we get rid of pride do we then go down the rabbit hole of getting rid of Black history month etc ?? I say keep on with pride x

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

I agree with some of what you have said.

There are certainly people whose opinions and prejudices you cannot change. And yes they need prosecuting by law as a deterrent perhaps.

But

* how do these laws come to be in force? How do we ensure people report such crimes? Enforce them? Those are the products of more open minded people whose minds have been changed and have been educated by things such as pride.

Pride / black history / women’s rights etc gain power by allies rather than by eradicating hatred.

(* I sometimes would rather be able to see someone’s views rather than them hide them though. Because that’s where danger lies often.)

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By *cunthorpe123Couple
45 weeks ago

scunthorpe

Personally, I think people fought so hard for pride.

The stonewall riots in particular were such a huge part of queer history and they deserve to be remembered.

Donna

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By *cunthorpe123Couple
45 weeks ago

scunthorpe

Also, I have a young trans son and for him to see people of all ages and orientations at pride events helps to make him feel seen and accepted.

I think pride is a huge importance for queer folk of all ages and it would be a huge shame to see it disappear

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By *eathcliffMan
45 weeks ago

Cardiff

Thank you for sharing your thoughts — they deserve to be heard.

Reading your words, I can understand your position. I’m a straight man myself, but like you, I’ve long felt a quiet loyalty to the outsider, the underdog — perhaps because I’m Welsh, or perhaps because I’ve seen too much cruelty dealt to those simply trying to live honestly.

This afternoon I was reading Derek Jarman’s 'Smiling in Slow Motion'. There’s a passage where he reflects: “The law reform of ’67 went through in my 25th year — I was a criminal for my first 25 years, and a second-class citizen for the next 25. I was finally arrested for being myself in this disgraceful society, illiterate in human complexity.”

I’m not ashamed to say I cried when in read those words..

It reminded me that pride — however imperfect, garish, or misunderstood it may appear — was born of pain. Born of being criminalised, ignored, brutalised. Not everyone finds strength in waving a flag or marching. For some, dignity is quieter, firmer, and takes the form of simply enduring, insisting on equal treatment, calmly demanding the law be upheld.

But both — the parade and the protest — arise from the same place: the need to be seen, to be counted, to live unafraid.

Perhaps there is no one way forward. For some, it’s defiance in colour and song. For others, it’s the daily act of living freely, quietly refusing to shrink. Both matter. Both honour the struggle.

And I agree with you wholeheartedly: the law must be upheld, rights must be asserted, and no one should suffer abuse or discrimination without consequences. But I also believe we must keep making room — for all the ways people survive, celebrate, and resist.

With respect.

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By *emenLover111 OP   Man
45 weeks ago

Sheffield (East Midlands)


"I agree with some of what you have said.

There are certainly people whose opinions and prejudices you cannot change. And yes they need prosecuting by law as a deterrent perhaps.

But

* how do these laws come to be in force? How do we ensure people report such crimes? Enforce them? Those are the products of more open minded people whose minds have been changed and have been educated by things such as pride.

Pride / black history / women’s rights etc gain power by allies rather than by eradicating hatred.

(* I sometimes would rather be able to see someone’s views rather than them hide them though. Because that’s where danger lies often.)

"
If someone calls someone a homophobic word, and it's done in an abusive manner, then it could be reported to the police. I've reported homophobic abuse to the police and they don't always take it seriously at first but if you persist in requesting action, they have no other choice but to investigate.

You'll notice I said homophobic abuse. There is a difference between someone having homophobic views and someone weaponising those views to degrade the quality of life for someone else. No one wants a barbaric society where people aren't allowed bigoted views but when people use those views to tell someone else to live their life or even physically attack them (as has happened to me), then there is a problem.

I think for homosexual men particularly, we have this stereotype of being weak and easy prey for homophobes to assault and attack us. I think we have to toughen up. We have to realise that not everyone will like us or our lifestyles but if say I was walking down the street and somebody called me a homophobic word, I would turn round and say to them that they should shut their mouth and make sure they know I ain't gonna tolerate abuse from them. Self defence classes are advisable and I've definitely looked at some self defence videos on YouTube but growing up in Sheffield, I do already know how to stick up for myself.

I also know of lesbian women who have been assaulted but I've never been a woman and never will be so that's not my story to tell, I just think it's sad that someone can be attacked in the street for holding hands with the person they love.

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By *emenLover111 OP   Man
45 weeks ago

Sheffield (East Midlands)

I also don't agree with the sexualised displays in public at pride marches, through town centres where children are about. I say the exact same about heterosexual displays of sexuality too, such as Madonna concerts where she simulated fellatio at a venue where I believe* children were able to attend.

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By *emenLover111 OP   Man
45 weeks ago

Sheffield (East Midlands)


"Also, I have a young trans son and for him to see people of all ages and orientations at pride events helps to make him feel seen and accepted.

I think pride is a huge importance for queer folk of all ages and it would be a huge shame to see it disappear "
Do you think it's worked to stop hate crime though?

Personally, I'm not convinced.

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By *emenLover111 OP   Man
45 weeks ago

Sheffield (East Midlands)


"Thank you for sharing your thoughts — they deserve to be heard.

Reading your words, I can understand your position. I’m a straight man myself, but like you, I’ve long felt a quiet loyalty to the outsider, the underdog — perhaps because I’m Welsh, or perhaps because I’ve seen too much cruelty dealt to those simply trying to live honestly.

This afternoon I was reading Derek Jarman’s 'Smiling in Slow Motion'. There’s a passage where he reflects: “The law reform of ’67 went through in my 25th year — I was a criminal for my first 25 years, and a second-class citizen for the next 25. I was finally arrested for being myself in this disgraceful society, illiterate in human complexity.”

I’m not ashamed to say I cried when in read those words..

It reminded me that pride — however imperfect, garish, or misunderstood it may appear — was born of pain. Born of being criminalised, ignored, brutalised. Not everyone finds strength in waving a flag or marching. For some, dignity is quieter, firmer, and takes the form of simply enduring, insisting on equal treatment, calmly demanding the law be upheld.

But both — the parade and the protest — arise from the same place: the need to be seen, to be counted, to live unafraid.

Perhaps there is no one way forward. For some, it’s defiance in colour and song. For others, it’s the daily act of living freely, quietly refusing to shrink. Both matter. Both honour the struggle.

And I agree with you wholeheartedly: the law must be upheld, rights must be asserted, and no one should suffer abuse or discrimination without consequences. But I also believe we must keep making room — for all the ways people survive, celebrate, and resist.

With respect."
Actually, heterosexuals can be victims of homophobic abuse too. It's often done on perceived sexuality in the eye of the abuser and often based on ridiculous stereotypes, such as being a bit sassy or being a more gentle soul.

I can definitely see how the pride movement was originally born out of a place of pain. If you push someone hard enough and tell them that doing something is wrong, eventually, they will rebel and be brazen with it. However, the pride marches increase as the decades go on (there are now 2 marches in my home city, used to be just one, un-advertised event) and I have actually found homophobia has increased. I receive more abuse now than I did ten years ago. But I don't tolerate it mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Pride still has its place. Just. It has been subverted in part by corporate rainbow washing (declining) and ok a greater part by the utter pathos of the gay world to block out what’s happening and get d*unk/laid.

The real - the only - response which works is in how Pride started. Militancy. Basically gay people need to learn to hit back. Physically, legally, financially.

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By *esigned_For_FunWoman
45 weeks ago

wherever I am. ;)

I think Pride is important.

For showing people, but especially bigots that whatever sexuality someone has, they are not alone. That a bigots negative language or behaviour will no longer be tolerated. Either by the Bi / Gay / Straight community or any other damn community!!

For use in or starting conversations with whomever, that can possibly re-educate a personal perception.

That being open-minded, especially when chatting to young people who are very nervous because they are aware but terrified their sexuality difference will be shameful.

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By *tlanshiaWoman
45 weeks ago

Chatham

It won't stop it. No.

What it does is gives people still scared to be themselves the courage to come out with people who share they're views. It makes people feel seen.

If it stops one person feeling like there is no way for them to live as they are, than it is worth it.

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By *kpiercedCouple
45 weeks ago

walsall

I always thought pride was a celebration of all things associated with LGBT

Excuse me if I’ve got the lettering wrong

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By *eathcliffMan
45 weeks ago

Cardiff

I agree with much of what’s been said above — particularly the idea that we cannot and should not tolerate abuse, whatever form it takes.

But I’d offer this too: Pride, in its truest form, isn’t just a parade. It’s protest. It’s political. It’s historical. It’s defiant. And crucially, it works. Not always immediately, and not always perfectly — but Pride has changed laws, changed minds, and saved lives.

How? Through visibility. Through the refusal to accept shame. Through the courage to say: here we are.

Of course, it’s not everyone’s form of expression. Some prefer quiet strength. That’s entirely valid. But I’d argue that allies and legislators don’t emerge from silence. They respond to truth-telling. To people standing up and saying: I exist, and I deserve to live free of fear.

Let’s not forget — this is how change happens. It’s how Black civil rights advanced. How women won the vote. How disability rights made it into law. It starts with people being seen. Being heard. Being counted.

I also understand the value of confronting abuse head-on. I admire those who take a stand in the moment, who report, who persist with the police, who don’t let it slide. And I absolutely agree: there’s a difference between someone holding a private prejudice, and someone weaponising that to degrade or harm. That distinction matters. Because the law must draw a line — not around people’s thoughts, but around their actions.

I’m straight, but I cried today reading Derek Jarman’s words in Smiling in Slow Motion:

“The law reform of ’67 went through in my 25th year — I was a criminal for my first 25 years, and a second-class citizen for the next 25. I was finally arrested for being myself in this disgraceful society, illiterate in human complexity.”

Tell me again that Pride has no place?

I’m Welsh. And perhaps that’s why I instinctively side with the outsider. The boy in school with an accent that didn’t fit. The people whose culture was dismissed as quaint, backward, irrelevant.

I remember AA Gill sneering at us as “pugnacious little d*unks.” His friend Jeremy Clarkson once snorted that “anyone who comes from Wales is genetically engineered to fail.” (Odd, that — considering his veterinary surgeon is Welsh. Small world, isn’t it?)

There are more, of course — too many to count. But that constant low hum of ridicule, of casual contempt? It teaches you something. It teaches you what it means to be mocked for your very being — for your voice, your name, your roots.

So yes, I understand the urge to stand firm, to fight back, to toughen up. That instinct — to walk upright and take no nonsense — is essential. But I also believe there’s power in solidarity. In being visible. In saying, even now: we are not going anywhere.

Silence is how bullies win. Pride — and I mean pride in its fullest, broadest sense — is how people survive.

And Sheffield? Sheffield is a great city. I’ve visited — more than once — and always found something quietly dignified and down-to-earth in its people. The steel city, built by craftsmen and grafters. A proud tradition of hard work, music, humour, and resilience. And of course, Michael Palin — a gentleman in every sense — hails from there. That’s not nothing. If Sheffield has taught people to stand their ground and not be walked over, then I say good for Sheffield.

But it’s not really about Pride, is it?

It’s about bullies.

And whether you're gay, Welsh, Black, a woman, disabled, or simply different, the only thing a bully understands — and respects — is someone who refuses to be shamed, refuses to be silenced, and who stands their ground with quiet, relentless dignity.

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By *andadbodMan
45 weeks ago

Liverpool

Self defence classes teach respect and discipline, as a black belt in traditional jiu jitsu ive only ever had to use my skills on the street once, and it was a last resort to protect myself and a friend I was with, I’d never jumpy straight to it cause of verbal abuse or even light physical, always taught to defuse a situation before it gets out of hand, violence is never the answer in any situation but there are times when you have no other choice, but that is the only time i would ever choose it, I wasn’t proud of my actions and regretted them afterwards, but as I said, I was defending myself and a friend at the time as a last resort option.

Fighting fire with fire doesn’t work.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago


"I agree with much of what’s been said above — particularly the idea that we cannot and should not tolerate abuse, whatever form it takes.

But I’d offer this too: Pride, in its truest form, isn’t just a parade. It’s protest. It’s political. It’s historical. It’s defiant. And crucially, it works. Not always immediately, and not always perfectly — but Pride has changed laws, changed minds, and saved lives.

How? Through visibility. Through the refusal to accept shame. Through the courage to say: here we are.

Of course, it’s not everyone’s form of expression. Some prefer quiet strength. That’s entirely valid. But I’d argue that allies and legislators don’t emerge from silence. They respond to truth-telling. To people standing up and saying: I exist, and I deserve to live free of fear.

Let’s not forget — this is how change happens. It’s how Black civil rights advanced. How women won the vote. How disability rights made it into law. It starts with people being seen. Being heard. Being counted.

I also understand the value of confronting abuse head-on. I admire those who take a stand in the moment, who report, who persist with the police, who don’t let it slide. And I absolutely agree: there’s a difference between someone holding a private prejudice, and someone weaponising that to degrade or harm. That distinction matters. Because the law must draw a line — not around people’s thoughts, but around their actions.

I’m straight, but I cried today reading Derek Jarman’s words in Smiling in Slow Motion:

“The law reform of ’67 went through in my 25th year — I was a criminal for my first 25 years, and a second-class citizen for the next 25. I was finally arrested for being myself in this disgraceful society, illiterate in human complexity.”

Tell me again that Pride has no place?

I’m Welsh. And perhaps that’s why I instinctively side with the outsider. The boy in school with an accent that didn’t fit. The people whose culture was dismissed as quaint, backward, irrelevant.

I remember AA Gill sneering at us as “pugnacious little d*unks.” His friend Jeremy Clarkson once snorted that “anyone who comes from Wales is genetically engineered to fail.” (Odd, that — considering his veterinary surgeon is Welsh. Small world, isn’t it?)

There are more, of course — too many to count. But that constant low hum of ridicule, of casual contempt? It teaches you something. It teaches you what it means to be mocked for your very being — for your voice, your name, your roots.

So yes, I understand the urge to stand firm, to fight back, to toughen up. That instinct — to walk upright and take no nonsense — is essential. But I also believe there’s power in solidarity. In being visible. In saying, even now: we are not going anywhere.

Silence is how bullies win. Pride — and I mean pride in its fullest, broadest sense — is how people survive.

And Sheffield? Sheffield is a great city. I’ve visited — more than once — and always found something quietly dignified and down-to-earth in its people. The steel city, built by craftsmen and grafters. A proud tradition of hard work, music, humour, and resilience. And of course, Michael Palin — a gentleman in every sense — hails from there. That’s not nothing. If Sheffield has taught people to stand their ground and not be walked over, then I say good for Sheffield.

But it’s not really about Pride, is it?

It’s about bullies.

And whether you're gay, Welsh, Black, a woman, disabled, or simply different, the only thing a bully understands — and respects — is someone who refuses to be shamed, refuses to be silenced, and who stands their ground with quiet, relentless dignity."

👏 👏👏👏

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

For me, and this might be me being pessimistic towards the human race in general, I think pride highlights differences between people and brings it to the forefront in a way that's percieved as "invasive".

And if there's one thing people don't like it's "different". Especially when it seemingly gets shoved down peoples throats in the media.

And this doesn't just apply to homophobia, but racism, or any other form of discrimination.

Is it a problem that's going to go away overnight? No, of course not. It's something that requires time, patience, and a change in societal mindset by making it look like it is "normal", for want of a better word.

So personally, I think rather than making big gestures to show that the LGBTQ community are people, the best way is to just not draw attention to the fact that different sexualities are a thing.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
Forum Mod
45 weeks ago

Central

It was very courageous for many to hold and visit Pride events - including in Budapest this summer, which the government banned for ideological reasons. Their move shows how progress can not be assumed as permanent or universally welcome. It was wonderful that thousands still matched in Budapest, in defiance.

They still mean much to many and can be their own statement about their own and others lives. If nothing else, they can be about coming together, with the strength of many and liberty.

I think they still have significance, as our world is undergoing harm, from people with power who foster illwill and disharmony. The rest of the year is free for other progressive action too

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By *kpiercedCouple
45 weeks ago

walsall

You’ve got to remember that people aren’t born homophobic

This is taught and learned from piers

So as the “teachers” die out and people in general get more accepting it will dwindle and hopefully die out

Not everyone looks at it this way but I’m confident that we will evolve to realise

It makes no difference what someone’s sexuality is

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago


"You’ve got to remember that people aren’t born homophobic

This is taught and learned from piers

So as the “teachers” die out and people in general get more accepting it will dwindle and hopefully die out

Not everyone looks at it this way but I’m confident that we will evolve to realise

It makes no difference what someone’s sexuality is "

Piers is the fucking worst.

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 30/07/25 23:30:10]

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By *cottish guy 555Man
45 weeks ago

London

Plus it's always good to feel that you are not alone. And meeting people with a shared experience can be quite profound.

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By *hager777Man
45 weeks ago

Hereford

As long as old enough legally and consenting what is the problem? Sex is enjoyable and natural

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By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Pride at heart is a political protest.

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