FabSwingers.com forum: Weirdest thing that's kept you awake

By *essicagrace OP Woman
45 weeks ago

birmingham

Trying to wind down and sleep after work. And I'm being kept awake by a local gosling learning to use his voice, which is apparently upsetting the local pigeons. The dog doesn't give a shit but it's weirdly worming in to my brain.

So I ask fab - what's the weirdest thing that's ever kept you awake, or woken you up?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andadbodMan
45 weeks ago

Liverpool

was woken up to a very loud neighbour talking on the phone in his back garden, this was around 4.30 in the morning 🙄

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ai Hard 2 - Dai HarderMan
45 weeks ago

Manchester / Cardiff

kept me awake: Anxiety (Not 'it took me a while to drift off becasue I had alot on my mind', but more, 'consecutive days of brain fucked insomnia)

woke me up: nothing, once I'm asleep, takes a lot to wake me up. Slept through an earthquake in San Francisco once.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eavenNhellCouple
45 weeks ago

carrbrook stalybridge

female cat on heat patrolling around the neighbourhood yowling to let all the males know she's up for it ! said males bickering loudly as to who gets ago first .like a night in a swingers club noisey lotb

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *arleycplWoman
45 weeks ago

Frodsham

A badger in the garden, noisey bugger

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ovefist84Man
45 weeks ago

Oswestry

Pain in my back

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avexxMan
45 weeks ago

cheshire

jays in the garden squawking,, but we cant be without nature

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

I love waking up to the sound of the birds chatting in my garden, however I do wish the seagulls would reset their alarm clocks. 5am is way too early for their raucous squawking.

Oh...and the vixens too! Every few weeks one of them uses my garden as their 'shag-pad' in the middle of the night. It always sounds like someone's being murdered 😱

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ohn 66Man
45 weeks ago

South Birmingham

My daughter once installed an alarm app on her phone so that I would be alerted with a load siren and her location on my phone if she pressed a button.

A great idea in theory, but the clumsy bugger tried to show it to a friend at 3am.

That was a traumatic minute until she answered her phone, totally unaware of what she'd done to my poor heart

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *parkle1974Woman
45 weeks ago

Leeds

One of my FWB's 🤣🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
45 weeks ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

My Alexa going off at random times with alarms set to wake me up with the Spice Girls.

But I'm 99% sure I know who to blame for that........🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *assy69Man
45 weeks ago

Wales/Sussex

"Trying to wind down and sleep after work. And I'm being kept awake by a local gosling learning to use his voice, which is apparently upsetting the local pigeons. The dog doesn't give a shit but it's weirdly worming in to my brain.

So I ask fab - what's the weirdest thing that's ever kept you awake, or woken you up? "

Weirdest thing that’s ever kept me awake?? ……….. trying to figure out how long it would take to brush all of the knots etc out of the fur of a highland cow

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *vaRoseWoman
45 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork

Last night it was my husbands CPAP. It developed a whistle that sounded like a dying pigeon

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Couple in a car shagging whilst parked in the OAP parking spaces opposite my house at about 3am in the morning.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
45 weeks ago

East London

A man shouting at the sky, trying to beat up the bus shelter outside my house.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rgasmatron1970Man
45 weeks ago

Bromley

My landlady getting the rogering of her life in the room next door ( she's not my type)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *its_and_TiramisuCouple
45 weeks ago

North Somerset

"My Alexa going off at random times with alarms set to wake me up with the Spice Girls.

But I'm 99% sure I know who to blame for that........🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️"

Ha ha ha ha ha

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want

🤣🤣🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *007ManMan
45 weeks ago

Worthing

New years eve party next door when I was in a flat. Would not mind but they all decided to sing 'Down Town' very loudly for some reason...many times!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Everybody in Love by JLS. Couldn't get it out of my head the day it came out

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hristianGray2005Man
45 weeks ago

Galway Mayo Clare Roscommon

4am, seagulls going at it outside. F**king seagulls.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *poolGuyMan
45 weeks ago

Liverpool

This week it's been gulls - the effing breeding season. Not a peep during the day.

And someone joining in online with a Church service in another continent singing away.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

An old man in hospital having a nightmare every night while I was in there for two weeks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aFemmeCoquetteWoman
45 weeks ago

Somewhere in the middle not the.....

Bloody mating pigeons that have somehow got into my loft..... well at least someone's getting some i suppose 😂😂

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *anchesterTaurusMan
45 weeks ago

Prestwich

My ex, she was so fucking weird.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

2 weeks ago when out fishing I had the loudest frog ever within 3 yds of my bivvy......

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

[Removed by poster at 28/07/25 15:23:11]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *WANDTGCouple
45 weeks ago

Borough of Greenwich

Ghost

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uffolkcouple-bi onlyCouple
45 weeks ago

West Suffolk

Next doors dogs barking at all hours

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *et and WillingCouple
45 weeks ago

Nuneaton

Our young single female neighbour talking to her friends on phone in garden all hours of the night. She isnt then most discreet and thats say we know alot about her personal life

Yes ok we do open the window a little more we can here better

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

hanging here because some loon was playing a saxophone 🎷 until 4.30 this morning......you know who you are

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ndian_jmCouple
45 weeks ago

Wigston

In-laws at it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exxyyDy11Man
45 weeks ago

North West

Neighbours cats on heat so naturally all the neighbourhood cats wanted to fuck her. So yeah...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"Neighbours cats on heat so naturally all the neighbourhood cats wanted to fuck her. So yeah..."

So some tom dick or harry was out getting pussy ?? 🤣🤣🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exxyyDy11Man
45 weeks ago

North West

"Neighbours cats on heat so naturally all the neighbourhood cats wanted to fuck her. So yeah...

So some tom dick or harry was out getting pussy ?? 🤣🤣🤣"

Got more pussy than me 😂

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

Around these parts it's either the gulls ...or the local pissheads having a row ... Or the Lidl lorry reversing up the road at 1am ... Beepers going,

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"Neighbours cats on heat so naturally all the neighbourhood cats wanted to fuck her. So yeah...

So some tom dick or harry was out getting pussy ?? 🤣🤣🤣

Got more pussy than me 😂"

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Gibbons

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"Gibbons"

Monkey business

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ser.meMan
45 weeks ago

Near you

So I ask fab - what's the weirdest thing that's ever kept you awake, or woken you up? "

A 12 inch strapon

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ypersoonMan
45 weeks ago

WHITCHURCH, Shropshire

A neighbouring holidaymaker at a recent caravan holiday up talking loudly with his van-mate & drinking till sunrise next day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

An earthquake when I was travelling in the Philippines 😳

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Casablanca, Morocco - woken suddenly from my sleep at around 3.30am at a sudden loud commotion in the street outside my hotel. As I became fully awake I was convinced there was a riot in full force!

So I got out of bed and pulled back the curtain to be greeted by the site of 100's of revellers parting like crazy in the street with cheering, singing and traditional Arabic instruments.

They were guests at a wedding!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
45 weeks ago

Inevitably woken early each day by my raging aching morning wood.

Around 04:00 this morning!

- Get down boy!

- na, I’m up for good!

- bloody hell!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exyInLatinMan
45 weeks ago

Warsop

I have been known to wake myself up with my snoring though I have never heard it so….im still not convinced 🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lirtyVampireBellaCouple
45 weeks ago

The bottom of the River Ankh

"I have been known to wake myself up with my snoring though I have never heard it so….im still not convinced 🤣"
I've actually done that 🤣🤣

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *illabongboy1971Man
45 weeks ago

Peebles area

Worrying about the bad fox and cat from Pinnochio

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avej500Man
45 weeks ago

Stevenage

When my anxiety it on one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread