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Casual sex and long-term consequences.

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By *a Luna OP   Woman
24 hours ago

o o OO o o

Bit of a serious one, but something that’s been playing on my mind. A while back, a former colleague got that phone call, the one from the sexual health clinic. He’s HIV positive.

It flipped his whole life upside down. He had to contact past partners, and he’d only just started seeing someone properly. No warning, no symptoms. Just one call, and everything changed.

Plenty of STIs are treatable and gone in a week. They’re inconvenient, but sorted. HIV is different. Yes, it’s manageable now, and I know some people take PrEP to reduce the risk, but if you catch it, it’s for life.

Given how casual a lot of encounters are on here, I sometimes wonder if people actually worry about that kind of call? Or has it just become background noise? And if you’re married and on here without your partner’s knowledge, do you test regularly? Do you worry about taking an STI home to your partner?

I think I’ve gotten more cautious as I’ve got older. I used to be more devil-may-care (even though condoms were used — nothing is 100% reliable).

Not judging anyone. Just genuinely curious. Do people still test regularly, or does it all feel a bit distant unless something starts itching? It’s just scary how quickly life can change just like that 🫰

Or am I overthinking it?

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By *ena AmourTV/TS
24 hours ago

Chard

You can't overthink your health.

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By *pirited obeliskMan
24 hours ago

Ryde

you're not wrong OP for having the mindful concerns about people casually playing around with different folk and it's potential consequences

health is important and getting yourself tested and making sure you're clean before playing with anyone should be a necessary procedure for anyone who's doing it, whether you're on here or not

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By *agic.MMan
24 hours ago

Orpington


"Bit of a serious one, but something that’s been playing on my mind. A while back, a former colleague got that phone call, the one from the sexual health clinic. He’s HIV positive.

It flipped his whole life upside down. He had to contact past partners, and he’d only just started seeing someone properly. No warning, no symptoms. Just one call, and everything changed.

Plenty of STIs are treatable and gone in a week. They’re inconvenient, but sorted. HIV is different. Yes, it’s manageable now, and I know some people take PrEP to reduce the risk, but if you catch it, it’s for life.

Given how casual a lot of encounters are on here, I sometimes wonder if people actually worry about that kind of call? Or has it just become background noise? And if you’re married and on here without your partner’s knowledge, do you test regularly? Do you worry about taking an STI home to your partner?

I think I’ve gotten more cautious as I’ve got older. I used to be more devil-may-care (even though condoms were used — nothing is 100% reliable).

Not judging anyone. Just genuinely curious. Do people still test regularly, or does it all feel a bit distant unless something starts itching? It’s just scary how quickly life can change just like that 🫰

Or am I overthinking it?"

I don't believe you're overthinking...I honestly would feel much more comfortable if providing regular STI/STD test results would be mandatory on fab... I personally always show the results with sexual partners and would expect it in return...it's the safest way to stay, well...SAFE- probably more so than using condoms.

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By *loudF7Man
24 hours ago

South East

100% agree in that your not overthinking.

I take my serial health very seriously and regularly get tested and also ask that any partners im with also get tested.

Still use protection just to help reduce any risk

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
24 hours ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Personally I think that people who use sites like this are probably more likely to test more frequently than those that don't.

People who don't have a lot of random casual sex are likely to only get tested if they have reason to, either symptoms or a notification from someone they've slept with.

And I imagine all the wives (and to a much lesser extent husbands) of people on here without their partners knowledge, many in very long term relationships, haven't bothered with getting tested in years. Why should they? So far as they're aware they haven't slept with anyone else in a long, long time.

Despite the fact that effectively they have, just through an unknown third party.......🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤬🤬

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
24 hours ago

Reading

I test regularly but sure at times it freaks me out. But in the end you can't spend your life in fear so you have to put it to the back of your mind and of course limit risk.

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By *morousCouple8Couple
24 hours ago

Cumbria

Not overthinking it at all. So far our limited experience of the swinging world has been pretty open and honest about testing and safe play but that’s maybe the type of people who we prefer to speak with.

We’ve had our date days to the GUM clinic 🤣 and test results shared by others with us too. Of course condoms aren’t 100% but regular testing and safe play for the win.

Though I did this morning see a meet request asking for anything “except safe sex” like wtaf! But that’s been an outlier.

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By *oodmessMan
24 hours ago

yumsville

I used to get tested maybe every 6 wks, condoms or not when you can catch something from a bj I didn't think I was overthinking it in the least.

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By *idssissyTV/TS
24 hours ago

Nr cricket ground birm

The only time I went to an adult cinema I couldn't get over how easily people were swapping partners and I couldn't help but think of the risk of stis.

I only do oral but like to get checked regularly though the processes where I live are a bit more onerous than they were

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By *a Luna OP   Woman
23 hours ago

o o OO o o

Thanks for all the replies. I really appreciate the thoughtful responses and it has been interesting to read your perspectives.

You hear about HIV, and if you were around in the 80s, you grew up knowing just how serious it was. The AIDS ads were everywhere. On telly, in the papers, full of fear. But thinking about it now, how many of us actually know or knew someone with HIV? For me, it was no one. Not until now.

It’s definitely made me pause and think a bit more. Still open to hearing other views, but just wanted to say thanks for the posts so far.

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By *ookie46Woman
23 hours ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Definitely not overthinking and the onus is on ourselves to test and not take the word on face value of people we may meet

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By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
22 hours ago

North Wessex Downs Ares

It's a real issue. Prep can be used, but that still leaves you ecposed to a plethora of other diseases that are becoming drug resistant.

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By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
22 hours ago

North Wessex Downs Ares

Unprotected gang bangs, regardless of the womans HIV status, or whether she is on PREP, arealso very high risk.

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