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"I did it once and he then did it again multiple times so no I’d never forgive someone for cheating ever again. Funny thing is if he had asked me if he could have had fun I probably would’ve said yes. " | |||
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"I think you've answered your own question in the last paragraph. Not only is everyone different, but people change based on their experiences. I won't be treated the way I've been treated in the past so while I believe everyone deserves a second chance I will be much firmer about sticking with that boundary and not letting it slide to a 3rd, 4th, 5th chance" Hi devilangel, yes, you are right there. I have answered it in the last paragraph, that is good you wont be treated the way you have been treated in the past too | |||
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"i wouldn't no. i didn't forgive someone who cheated w me (i wasn't aware he wasn't single). and i didn't forgive someone who casually told me he was seeing someone else who was cheating with them. basically i don't associate w cheaters. i would definitely not forgive someone cheating ON me. " Hi _eonknife, you are right there, that is good how you wouldnt associate yourself with cheaters too | |||
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"I think I would be able to forgive someone for cheating on me if I knew what led them to doing that. That doesn't mean I'd stay with them though. " I forgave someone who cheated on a night out, she just got horny and needed a fuck. It wasnt like she loved the guy and she regretted it massivley. | |||
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"If you can that's great. I'm not sure I could fully. Forgiveness is hard earned with me. I'd have to be sure they meant it. I would probably try if I thought the person was worth it. " Exactly, when my ex cheated it certainly wasn't easy to forgive or forget, the only reason i did was because i realised my actions and behaviour at the time weren't the best either and she probably felt neglected by me.... not saying that's an excuse because it's not. | |||
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"I always say what’s the route of the cause in the first place People cheat wether it’s emotional or sexual if there is something missing at home, the saying goes if your not getting what you need at home and can’t sort it out you start looking else where even if it’s not sexual. Many men cheat because the partners if not getting what most men need and that’s a lot of sex with no stress Woman tend to want more, protecting and been looked after, not just money put pampered with flowers the odd time I am not speaking for everyone here but 95% of men see sex as a need not emotionally attached Woman tend to need the emotional side more that’s why men’s don’t see cheating as bad as a woman I would be totally wrong here but it’s just what I have learned " I don't think you are wrong but I do think it's a somewhat blinkered and stereotypical view. There are those that cheat ( either gender ) just because they can, it's their nature, their psyche, their lack of commitment , their giving way to impluse , lack of respect for their partner , putting themselves first etc ....... and maybe at times their simple humanity ...... Too easy to make a woman the problem and say the man wasn't getting what he needed so 'had' to cheat.. really reduces men to nothing more than a cock to be fair to them. | |||
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"Before I ask the question I will set the scene. I watched an episode of eastenders and there it goes back and forth with george and elaine if they like eachother or not Finally they have separated and ended their relationship and gone separate ways, the reason they did it was because elaine confessed to george about that she had slept with another man and how appreciated she felt by it, it was something that she had missed with george, she didnt want to say it to him first because she knew it could be devastating for them and it showed that it was that too. Elaine thought that it was rich coming from george, reason being as he had been with other women, but george coulnt forgive her, even though elaine had forgiven him the other times, it is understandable why she felt like that. was it revenge sex from her side? It would be interesting to see what you think of it, if you should forgive someone that have cheated, can you forgive them, or is it the case that you can forgive them but you stick together because of the kids and what you have like the house. That got me thinking, have you been in the same kind of situation where you had to accept what they have done or how did you handle it, or if it would happened, what would you do? I think that forgiveness in the case of cheating is a personal decision with no easy answer too it because It depends on individual circumstances and the willingness of both parties to work on rebuilding trust too . At work myself and a colleague go lunch at the same time.We sit in a corner and discuss the previous nights Eastenders and have done for the last 8 years.Basically Elaine saw George hugging and it looked like they were having a full blown kiss only they weren’t with his ex wife Cindy.Before that she had seen them talking in a corner hugging and holding hands.George & Cindy have 2 daughters in there 20’s so it’s natural they are going to ralk.Elaine is in secure because tbh Cindy is prettier than her and her ex husband was gay and left her for another man.She has always felt 2nd best so when the man made a play for her suddenly she felt number 1 even though she knew it would be a one night stand.Me and my colleague both feel that George & Elaine are good for each other but Elaine has to understand that where there are kids involved even though the girls are adults George and Cindy are going to talk and embrace.George has never actually cheated on Elaine.It is George that wants the divorce as she feels she is always 2nd best. | |||
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"I always say what’s the route of the cause in the first place People cheat wether it’s emotional or sexual if there is something missing at home, the saying goes if your not getting what you need at home and can’t sort it out you start looking else where even if it’s not sexual. Many men cheat because the partners if not getting what most men need and that’s a lot of sex with no stress Woman tend to want more, protecting and been looked after, not just money put pampered with flowers the odd time I am not speaking for everyone here but 95% of men see sex as a need not emotionally attached Woman tend to need the emotional side more that’s why men’s don’t see cheating as bad as a woman I would be totally wrong here but it’s just what I have learned I don't think you are wrong but I do think it's a somewhat blinkered and stereotypical view. There are those that cheat ( either gender ) just because they can, it's their nature, their psyche, their lack of commitment , their giving way to impluse , lack of respect for their partner , putting themselves first etc ....... and maybe at times their simple humanity ...... Too easy to make a woman the problem and say the man wasn't getting what he needed so 'had' to cheat.. really reduces men to nothing more than a cock to be fair to them. " Sorry my post wasn’t saying men but saying both way, man or woman will both look else where if there is something missing in the relationship sex or not, some just for attention, don’t forget in the states it’s the woman that files for divorce than men | |||
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"It would depend on many variables but probably not" Hi nicecouple, yes, you are right there, it would depend on many variables, probably not is good too | |||
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"I have forgiven an ex for attempted cheating. That was only because he was the father of my child. I dumped him the second time he tried it, and then found out I was pregnant with our second. Didn’t take him back. He had the cheek to say “I thought you’d just shout at me, not kick me out”. It’s just not worth the second guessing and the emotional anxiety of wondering if they’re texting someone when they stay up late and you go to bed early etc. I just can’t put myself through that, for anyone. Life is too short." Hi luna, that is good you have forgiven your ex for attempted cheating, yes, life is too short as well | |||
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"I always say what’s the route of the cause in the first place People cheat wether it’s emotional or sexual if there is something missing at home, the saying goes if your not getting what you need at home and can’t sort it out you start looking else where even if it’s not sexual. Many men cheat because the partners if not getting what most men need and that’s a lot of sex with no stress Woman tend to want more, protecting and been looked after, not just money put pampered with flowers the odd time I am not speaking for everyone here but 95% of men see sex as a need not emotionally attached Woman tend to need the emotional side more that’s why men’s don’t see cheating as bad as a woman I would be totally wrong here but it’s just what I have learned " Yes, the route of the cause in the first place is important too | |||
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"More EastEnders eh Shag 💜 For me, hard no. I don't forgive cheating. More specifically, I don't forgive self serving dishonesty. Other people can react however they like to it 💜" Hi _reytothefairies, yes, it is, that is good you dont forgive cheating too | |||
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"I think it's reasonable to forgive and to move on, if each person is fully understanding of the situation and there's an agreement in place, to manage the future relationship and stresse it may face " Yes, forgive and to move on is good too | |||
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"I always say what’s the route of the cause in the first place People cheat wether it’s emotional or sexual if there is something missing at home, the saying goes if your not getting what you need at home and can’t sort it out you start looking else where even if it’s not sexual. Many men cheat because the partners if not getting what most men need and that’s a lot of sex with no stress Woman tend to want more, protecting and been looked after, not just money put pampered with flowers the odd time I am not speaking for everyone here but 95% of men see sex as a need not emotionally attached Woman tend to need the emotional side more that’s why men’s don’t see cheating as bad as a woman I would be totally wrong here but it’s just what I have learned Yes, the route of the cause in the first place is important too There is only ONE cause. Nothing and no one makes people cheat. It's their own decision | |||
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"There are no "reasons" for cheating...only excuses which I would never forgive, hence the reason I walked out of a 7 year relationship. All these excuses of "wife/husband not putting out and "can't leave because of kids/money or the classic "but I still love them" bollocks is just that....bollocks. Do you honest think your significant other would feel like you "loved them" if they found out you were fucking others behind their back???" Hi sparkle, yes, you are right there, that there are no reasons for cheating only excuses, that is good you walked away too | |||
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"I couldn’t when my ex did even though we got back together and had another 7 years together,I felt I never could as it literally destroyed everything I held dear, I absolutely adored my family it meant the world to me I still often wish now I can life in those years forever when the kids were young and before she cheated and ran off I feel it was last time was truly happy The year we split for good I was at work on a job by the sea it was a lovely hot day laying Indian stone flags under the sun and I remember thinking I feel amazing which was rare then it hit me I was a loser who took a lass back who cheated ran off and that was it back to feeling shit I think that was the realisation it would never work " You are definitely not a looser. Sounds like you just wanted your family unit back and happy. Sorry to hear it did not work out but that's not in you. | |||
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"It depends on why they cheated, I'd forgive but I'd never forget & I'd have trust issues then with them too" I'm the same | |||
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"I couldn’t when my ex did even though we got back together and had another 7 years together,I felt I never could as it literally destroyed everything I held dear, I absolutely adored my family it meant the world to me I still often wish now I can life in those years forever when the kids were young and before she cheated and ran off I feel it was last time was truly happy The year we split for good I was at work on a job by the sea it was a lovely hot day laying Indian stone flags under the sun and I remember thinking I feel amazing which was rare then it hit me I was a loser who took a lass back who cheated ran off and that was it back to feeling shit I think that was the realisation it would never work You are definitely not a looser. Sounds like you just wanted your family unit back and happy. Sorry to hear it did not work out but that's not in you. " Thank you mate kind of you to say you right that is all I wanted mate or else would never have went back there if wasn’t for the kids | |||
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"I have done once and never would again you never get that trust back and its never the same ... not for everyone of course some people do but not for me 😁" Never.. Trust is the key to all things relationship x | |||
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"I only cheated on my diet once this week. Am I forgiven?" No sorry you also tell lies your not the messiah ... walking red flag you 🚩🤣 | |||
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"I only cheated on my diet once this week. Am I forgiven? No sorry you also tell lies your not the messiah ... walking red flag you 🚩🤣" Tell lies? | |||
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"I have done once and never would again you never get that trust back and its never the same ... not for everyone of course some people do but not for me 😁" I agree, have myself forgiven someone and as you say, it really is hard to get the trust back after. | |||
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