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Dom Sub d/s Dynamic

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan

Helllooooooooo

I’ve recently entered into a submissive role and I am THRIVING. I’ve never felt as fulfilled in my whole life.

Naturally I'm eager to research, and learn more on the subject, but there’s not much information on here when I’ve searched.

I’d love to hear from other women who have adopted the same position as me. So please do get in touch with me

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By *istressZephyraWoman
6 days ago

London

Google submissive guide. It’s got some useful info.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"Google submissive guide. It’s got some useful info.

"

Thank you

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By *emorefridaCouple
6 days ago

La la land

If it's something entirely new to you. It's a bit like leaving a child in a sweet shop and expecting them to make the best decisions.

My advice would be to take things slowly and do your research, beware of new submissive frenzy. It's far too easy in the feeling of euphoria that being a new sub gives to get a bit carried away. I'll openly admit I didn't do enough research and when I accidentally hit subspace for the first time I thought we'd broken me. This resulted in a lot of research and a totally different mindset to it all.

Take your time and remember you can say no to anything, it doesn'take you a bad sub in fact quite the opposite. Inbox is open if you want to ask anything. F

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By *teveanddebsCouple
6 days ago

Norwich

[Removed by poster at 20/07/25 09:38:48]

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By *teveanddebsCouple
6 days ago

Norwich

You are starting well asking for info from other submissives.

All too often you see wannabe dominants offering to 'mentor' female subs and it usually means they are trying to get in their knickers.

"If you were a real sub you would {insert depraved act here}"

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York

talk talk talk.

Talk about consent.

Talk about safety.

Talk about negotiation.

Bite sized chunks.. trying to do too much/many of all the exciting things before you can be overwhelming.

Remember SUBS have all the power in a d/s dynamic.. not the dom!! Any good dom knows this is sacrosanct...

Whatever scene you are in, you give the consent..

Go to munches and talk to people in similar dynamics.

There is a site many Fabbers dislike or don't know about that is perfect for starting your journey.

Feel free to inbox us and we'll give you some info.

I agree with some of the above people, steer clear of wannabe doms who just want to get off on power, and get in your pants..

This dort of dynamic/lifestyle is a constant learning process that all parties involved need to embrace..

Safety is paramount.

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep.

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By *melia DominaTV/TS
6 days ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

All of the above are great coments and actions to think about.

I would also look to seeking out event and munch socials to find your submissive tribe.

One to one connections can provide an invaluable support network.

There are bdsm platforms which have a fountain of information and calendars of events in your local area.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep."

Thank you for looking out for me We seem to have discussed and covered all those bases together already.

I’m pretty well informed and knowledgeable on the dynamic, so I do know what is to be expected of him.

He’s been living and experiencing the scene for a number of years, so knows what is expected of him.

The only part where my knowledge is lacking … is creativity and inspiration. I want to be nosy and find out from others what escapades they’ve got up to, so I can pinch ideas from them

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville

You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep.

Thank you for looking out for me We seem to have discussed and covered all those bases together already.

I’m pretty well informed and knowledgeable on the dynamic, so I do know what is to be expected of him.

He’s been living and experiencing the scene for a number of years, so knows what is expected of him.

The only part where my knowledge is lacking … is creativity and inspiration. I want to be nosy and find out from others what escapades they’ve got up to, so I can pinch ideas from them "

Well.. again feel free to message and I'm sure Teecups will happily let you pinch some heehee..

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

"

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep.

Thank you for looking out for me We seem to have discussed and covered all those bases together already.

I’m pretty well informed and knowledgeable on the dynamic, so I do know what is to be expected of him.

He’s been living and experiencing the scene for a number of years, so knows what is expected of him.

The only part where my knowledge is lacking … is creativity and inspiration. I want to be nosy and find out from others what escapades they’ve got up to, so I can pinch ideas from them

Well.. again feel free to message and I'm sure Teecups will happily let you pinch some heehee..

"

Thank you both, I really appreciate your kindness and time x

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means. "

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville

*And I am taking the word "recently" from your OP, and what you say in it.. and from your profile, which is less than a year old

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By *eyond PurityCouple
6 days ago

Lincolnshire

How about joining that other Fet site that can't be named?!

C

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By *aggy dollsCouple
6 days ago

bradford


"How about joining that other Fet site that can't be named?!

C"

I think you're referring to the "FETish LIFEstyle" site there is a world of inspiration on there

Mr H

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan

A little bit unhinged to have invested your time over analysing my profile…

For the record my earliest photo upload on my account is dated April 2023.

Please carry on believing whatever you believe about me, I have better things to do than explain and justify myself to a stranger.

Enjoy your Sunday. X

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By *hastity_roseTV/TS
6 days ago

Nowhere

I can only dream of my own Dominant to serve .

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By *electableicecreamMan
6 days ago

The West


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas"

It's you. Why on earth would you call out someone like this? You don't know anything about them.

Like, what's your point? All they did was ask for tips and ideas and here you are trying to paint them in a negative light for no apparent reason other than you decided to put someone down based on reasons that you basically made up to suit your purpose.

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By *aggy dollsCouple
6 days ago

bradford


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas

It's you. Why on earth would you call out someone like this? You don't know anything about them.

Like, what's your point? All they did was ask for tips and ideas and here you are trying to paint them in a negative light for no apparent reason other than you decided to put someone down based on reasons that you basically made up to suit your purpose.

"

Very eloquently put.

Mr H

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By *adyBugsWoman
6 days ago

cognito

[Removed by poster at 20/07/25 13:12:12]

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By *adyBugsWoman
6 days ago

cognito


"Helllooooooooo

I’ve recently entered into a submissive role and I am THRIVING. I’ve never felt as fulfilled in my whole life.

Naturally I'm eager to research, and learn more on the subject, but there’s not much information on here when I’ve searched.

I’d love to hear from other women who have adopted the same position as me. So please do get in touch with me "

Consent: it works for BOTH parties and either can remove consent at any time for any reason so always communicate boundaries, wants & needs in all aspects of your dynamics. Focus is often on how the sub feels but the power exchange can also influence a Dom in negative ways too so it’s important for both parties to openly and honestly talk with each other.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
6 days ago

in Lancashire


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas

It's you. Why on earth would you call out someone like this? You don't know anything about them.

Like, what's your point? All they did was ask for tips and ideas and here you are trying to paint them in a negative light for no apparent reason other than you decided to put someone down based on reasons that you basically made up to suit your purpose.

"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

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By *adyBugsWoman
6 days ago

cognito


"

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep."

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan

Ooooh that is a really good point to make about the wellbeing of the dom needing to be recognised.

Both parties EQUALLY read the body language and mood of the other person, so they can adapt their behaviour and actions accordingly. Both parties are humans… and have feelings too.

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By *estructionDollyWoman
6 days ago

The Deep Dark Woods

I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas

It's you. Why on earth would you call out someone like this? You don't know anything about them.

Like, what's your point? All they did was ask for tips and ideas and here you are trying to paint them in a negative light for no apparent reason other than you decided to put someone down based on reasons that you basically made up to suit your purpose.

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked.. "

Wow!!! I'm glad people have called out your BS!!!

As alluded to in my responses. We as kinksters, no matter what experience we may have, are always seeking advice sbd tips. Because. That's how we improve our dynamics, become safer, and expand that experience.

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By *lack FridayMan
6 days ago

Galway

My tuppence worth

Cherish and respect one another.

Always feel safe

Lots of talking, especially in the early days.

Most of all - enjoy it all.

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"You're owned, have a collar, cuffs, leads, masks, audio and sensory dep profile pic but say you have recently entered a submissive role?

The two things don't add up. You don't get owned, but only just enter a sub role or have the accessories you do without first enjoying some type of submissive sexual play first.

I don't understand the point of this thread... people are throwing out safe word tips when they are seemingly deep in master/sub relations.

Please can you elaborate for me, as I’m not sure what you’re trying to imply here?

I don’t know what connection you’re trying to make between the images on my profile, and me saying that I have recently entered into a sub role?

Would you like me to give you details of the journey we’ve taken so far, complete with dates and times… so you can analyse how long our dynamic has existed?

Apologies if you misunderstand what the word “recently” means.

I am not implying anything. It might be me but I'd hazard a guess that any sub, any dom, wouldn't be give/receive a collar in under a year to a new sub, same with leads, cuffs, and hoods. It usually starts sexually.. holding down, spanking, using toys to either force or edge, using kitchen utensils - spatulas and so on and so on and builds from there. It's usually where people get a liking for d/s play, roles or more vanilla type.

You are asking for hints and tips but it you have a master and already have a lot of gear, and with the sensory play in your pic, it looks like you are fairly well along with ideas

It's you. Why on earth would you call out someone like this? You don't know anything about them.

Like, what's your point? All they did was ask for tips and ideas and here you are trying to paint them in a negative light for no apparent reason other than you decided to put someone down based on reasons that you basically made up to suit your purpose.

"

MY purpose? You sound as if I hold some kind a grudge?

To be straight, they didn't ask for tips, people started giving them - they already new them. They asked for people to DM if were d/s. That is why I questioned their play, ownership, collars etc given OP said "recent to sub"

We don't know if it's the male or female asking.. if this another thread to have 'willing (new) subs' mail for play. If they are new and are hooding etc - fair play but for me you don't jump from vanilla sex to a collar and chain overnight. It's observation, if that's negative, get the paddle out

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice. "

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X"

Allmusicmatters..

Look me up..

Say hello. And I can help if you'd like.

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked.. "

... what was asked in OP... was dm's.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

Allmusicmatters..

Look me up..

Say hello. And I can help if you'd like."

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By *adyBugsWoman
6 days ago

cognito


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X"

That site is terrible to navigate. Maybe get yourself to some munches/group socials first and make some real life connections who are already established on that site? Then your network of connections can grow plus you’ve got plenty of people who can help you vet new friends if needed from a safety perspective?

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

That site is terrible to navigate. Maybe get yourself to some munches/group socials first and make some real life connections who are already established on that site? Then your network of connections can grow plus you’ve got plenty of people who can help you vet new friends if needed from a safety perspective? "

Absolutely agree on munches...

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By *estructionDollyWoman
6 days ago

The Deep Dark Woods


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X"

Yes it's not particularly user friendly which is annoying ☹️ sometimes you can find groups on there that are based around interests you have, and you can post threads in the group asking for advice or for people to contact you to chat.

I hope you find what you're looking for. I play kinky at times, but I am not in a formal D/s dynamic with anyone or "owned" (I don't enjoy the high protocol side of kink) so probably not the best to offer advice about that 😊

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
6 days ago

in Lancashire


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's. "

But not being dug out by someone with no knowledge other than your assumptions..

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan

It really isn’t healthy to be that paranoid and sceptical of things other people post.

Well done buddy, you did an absolutely terrible job of trying to keep people “safe” from me. Next time you want to protect the vulnerable public from replying to a dangerous post like mine, skip the extensive criticising comments and write “beware people…this person could be dangerous”

Or perhaps you can exercise your right to mind your business and scroll by posts that bare no relevance to you.

Congratulations though, your investigative skills were amazing. I’m a man, with an account that is less than 12 months old, posting to lure new subs to message me. MI5 said you can start on Monday.

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By *electableicecreamMan
6 days ago

The West


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's. "

It's both amusing and saddening that you can't see beyond the end of your nose on this one.

There's no need to die on this hill. Just let it go.

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By *aron Van WinkleMan
6 days ago

The Velvet Den of Desire

I’m surprised this topic didn’t get sidetracked sooner, the lounge is notmaly good for it.

I love always been intrigued by the sub/dom thing and lean heavily that way I suppose, so I read this with some interest. I’ve nothing more to add other than - thanks for an insight to you lifestyle. 🙏

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's.

But not being dug out by someone with no knowledge other than your assumptions.. "

Makes you wonder if a sepia bdsm pic gets you out of questions with the amount of threads that get called out.

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's.

It's both amusing and saddening that you can't see beyond the end of your nose on this one.

There's no need to die on this hill. Just let it go."

You realise there's no hill as their profile and OP are in plain sight. I am pointing out the obvious. You don't have to be a genius.

Simply because this has a PowerRanger Unite response, doesn't make it true.

I'll leave you to dm each other.

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By *ensualMan
6 days ago

Sutton


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

That site is terrible to navigate. Maybe get yourself to some munches/group socials first and make some real life connections who are already established on that site? Then your network of connections can grow plus you’ve got plenty of people who can help you vet new friends if needed from a safety perspective?

Absolutely agree on munches..."

You did not perhaps run one..in Croydon and attend one at Crystal Palace

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By *2000ManMan
6 days ago

Worthing

Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's.

It's both amusing and saddening that you can't see beyond the end of your nose on this one.

There's no need to die on this hill. Just let it go.

You realise there's no hill as their profile and OP are in plain sight. I am pointing out the obvious. You don't have to be a genius.

Simply because this has a PowerRanger Unite response, doesn't make it true.

I'll leave you to dm each other. "

I respect your dedication and commitment to expose me as a fake/scam dom.

It’s clearly your area of expertise and something you have extensive knowledge about.

I’m sorry that in the past you have fallen victim to a fake Dom and I understand that’s why you’re so passionate to prevent it from happening to another person.

At the end of the day, if scrutinising my profile has made you feel better then I’m happy for you.

I really needed a laugh today so thank you for the entertainment.

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By *.A.Kink OP   Woman
6 days ago

wigan


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

I can’t remember where I asked you for your opinion on my lifestyle but thanks for sharing it with us.

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By *oodmessMan
6 days ago

yumsville


"

This..

Needless criticism rather than what was asked..

... what was asked in OP... was dm's.

It's both amusing and saddening that you can't see beyond the end of your nose on this one.

There's no need to die on this hill. Just let it go.

You realise there's no hill as their profile and OP are in plain sight. I am pointing out the obvious. You don't have to be a genius.

Simply because this has a PowerRanger Unite response, doesn't make it true.

I'll leave you to dm each other.

I respect your dedication and commitment to expose me as a fake/scam dom.

It’s clearly your area of expertise and something you have extensive knowledge about.

I’m sorry that in the past you have fallen victim to a fake Dom and I understand that’s why you’re so passionate to prevent it from happening to another person.

At the end of the day, if scrutinising my profile has made you feel better then I’m happy for you.

I really needed a laugh today so thank you for the entertainment.

"

It's a bit odd this... but when someone quotes me, I am inclined to reply. You have replied earlier, I didn't reply for sake of thread, instead replying to others and not replying to others.. for sake of thread.

It doesn't take much to point things out. There is nothing on your profile bar "owned". There is nothing on the thread bar "recent sub", "dm me", with replies that include "We seem to have discussed and covered all those bases together already".

If you want me reply I can, but a quick tip is that anyone can reply to a thread... like it, don't, agree with it, chat about it, ignore it. I moved past replying a while ago, I have a little to do but can post my opinion and keep posting it if you like.

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By *idssissyTV/TS
6 days ago

Nr cricket ground birm


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

That site is terrible to navigate. Maybe get yourself to some munches/group socials first and make some real life connections who are already established on that site? Then your network of connections can grow plus you’ve got plenty of people who can help you vet new friends if needed from a safety perspective?

Absolutely agree on munches...

You did not perhaps run one..in Croydon and attend one at Crystal Palace "

Once you do navigate it it's a very useful site for what you want

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"I don't think fab is particularly kink friendly sadly, especially the forums.

As much as there are always a few lovely helpful people willing to be give advice, there's also lots of negative, critical, judgey and kinkphobic people who have to weigh in with their 2p.

There are other more kink/fetish orientated sites and online communities where you might be better asking advice.

I’ve realised that now… I naively believed this was a non judgmental safe space.

It’s a shame because I’m somebody who prides themselves on never kink shaming ANYONE for ANYTHING.

Thank you for your kindness. I have already joined the f 3 t site… a while ago… but I’m struggling to figure how to navigate my way round it perhaps this is my incentive to finally figure it out! X

That site is terrible to navigate. Maybe get yourself to some munches/group socials first and make some real life connections who are already established on that site? Then your network of connections can grow plus you’ve got plenty of people who can help you vet new friends if needed from a safety perspective?

Absolutely agree on munches...

You did not perhaps run one..in Croydon and attend one at Crystal Palace "

We may well have

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By *rimal InstinctCouple
6 days ago

Carlisle


"

Also, do you know about aftercare and sub drop?

Discuss Dom drop too.. it is a thing.

Discuss your checking in protocol during and after scenes.

The traffic light system is very good, and should mean you won't ever need to use your safe word.

However you must discuss and trust your dom adheres to them. So many so called doms nowadays dismiss this, as if to say, you won't need one, or they won't respect it.

Discuss an alternative to safe words if your doing sensory depravation or a scene where your unable to talk..

I might be going on, but I've seen so much poor practice over the years, and it gives us kinksters a bad rep.

Thank you for looking out for me We seem to have discussed and covered all those bases together already.

I’m pretty well informed and knowledgeable on the dynamic, so I do know what is to be expected of him.

He’s been living and experiencing the scene for a number of years, so knows what is expected of him.

The only part where my knowledge is lacking … is creativity and inspiration. I want to be nosy and find out from others what escapades they’ve got up to, so I can pinch ideas from them "

Hi,

I'd say looking at FETish LIFEstyle site is a great resource. As it has people with different kinks on there, people in different sorts of relationships as well as the different stages of relationship. As well as writings and groups for all sorts. There are also a wealth of ideas on high jinks that you can get up to, ie are you more of a brat sub or a good girl sub?

I'm not a sub brat at all, just a little cheeky at times so some of the stuff my friends get up to, I would nooooo way do. But it's a good place to connect and it has a lot of events and munches advertised too.

Also read read read. There are lots of kink type books out there. I read lots of kink fiction and they are great for ideas and the consequences given for when mischief has occured 😁😁

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By *rPunxMan
6 days ago

Hull

Some great advice already given. All I would add is attend some munches, and some events (in a purely research stance) and take things slowly and safely until you gain more experience. The other site is good for kink related stuff. Also to back up the warning be careful of wannabes. They have done alot of damage to the scene/lifestyle.

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By *icentiousCouple
6 days ago

Up on them there hills

Submissive perspective alway a great starting place.

To me(my perspective ) the relationship is like a dance.

The submissive might choose the dance and lead to the dance floor however the assertive leads the dance.

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By *reachersdaughterWoman
6 days ago

Someplace

I did it before, and wouldn't do it again. As someone said above, it should be a two way thing.

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By *istressZephyraWoman
6 days ago

London


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

Why do you think it isn’t a two way thing?

It’s a power exchange

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By *tlanshiaWoman
6 days ago

Chatham

Fet

Life.

The forums on there helped me immensely when I started out in this world.

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By *eacupsbearCouple
6 days ago

York


"Fet

Life.

The forums on there helped me immensely when I started out in this world. "

I'm so stealing this way of writing it

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By *idssissyTV/TS
6 days ago

Nr cricket ground birm

[Removed by poster at 20/07/25 22:09:56]

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By *ensualMan
5 days ago

Sutton


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

But a thought built on a Fab and general misconception that D/s is purely about sex or "slap and tickle".

Each D/s relationships is different and the sexual control element varies in each relationship. Not all D/s is built on the "Story of O".

As others have pointed out it can be about cherishing each other. In modern D/s both the sub and Dom are equal as humans and in the relationship. However, many believe that the D/s dynamic is about consensual power or authority exchange, ie a desire and need to be in an hierarchical relationship being the hallmark of D/s. The consensual power exchange may be sexual or any mix of different behaviors.

If you feel D/s is too much look up either Owner and Property relationships or Gorean relationships.

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By *estructionDollyWoman
5 days ago

The Deep Dark Woods


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

A someone who likes playing the submissive role, I get as much from it as the Dom does. It is absolutely a two way thing.

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By *asual TeaCouple
5 days ago

Manchester


"Helllooooooooo

I’ve recently entered into a submissive role and I am THRIVING. I’ve never felt as fulfilled in my whole life.

Naturally I'm eager to research, and learn more on the subject, but there’s not much information on here when I’ve searched.

I’d love to hear from other women who have adopted the same position as me. So please do get in touch with me "

There is A LOT of information out there, it’s just about knowing where to look.

A basic beginner’s is The Ethical Slut or Screw the Roses, Give me the Thorns’ both are excellent books.

If you google D/s guides or books about submission, you will get some basic hits.

Also if you look at the web site Fet… life without the space you’ll find a lot of help

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By *asual TeaCouple
5 days ago

Manchester


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

Thanks for your input on something that is nothing to do with you. This comment shows that you know nothing about it

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By *og and MuseCouple
5 days ago

Dubai & Nottingham

[Removed by poster at 21/07/25 14:52:14]

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By *ore_Please81Woman
5 days ago

Edinburgh

I’ve been sexually submissive since 19. Feel free to DM me x

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By *ore_Please81Woman
5 days ago

Edinburgh


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."

You clearly don’t understand a D/s dynamic. You don’t get any more equal and two-way as this. Stay in your lane.

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By *eacupsbearCouple
5 days ago

York


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought.

You clearly don’t understand a D/s dynamic. You don’t get any more equal and two-way as this. Stay in your lane."

This

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By *rPunxMan
4 days ago

Hull


"Not into subs, sex should be a two-way thing. Just a thought."
why contribute to a thread you have no interest in? Does your ego dictate that you must inform everyone of your 'superior opinions ' ?

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By *layfull pairingCouple
4 days ago

Bristol

As previous suggestions... go to munches and club nights... you will see,hear things and witness dynamics that you wouldn’t have even thought about.... it’s a journey, don’t rush into it too fast.

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By *istressmystiqueeWoman
4 days ago

Bournemouth


"Fet

Life.

The forums on there helped me immensely when I started out in this world. "

Seconded. More kink based just takes a while to get used to

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