FabSwingers.com forum: Have you ever felt pressured?

By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Pestered, coerced , manipulated even to do something that you’re not quite sure you wanted to do on here. I’m talking about things like:

Kiss somebody on a social

Leave a verification for someone you barely know

Go on a second social

Did you have a look at the person’s verifications from others and think they must be safe but deep down in your mind you weren’t sure?

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By *ittleLiaisonsWoman
4 weeks ago

Birmingham

Not pressured but doing something I wasn't comfortable with to get out of a situation or felt obliged to? Sure.

I wouldnt now though, I've grown since then.

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By *ellinever70Woman
4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

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By *estructionDollyWoman
4 weeks ago

The Deep Dark Woods

Yes, a few times

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By *sStephenPickleMan
4 weeks ago

Ends

No.

I’ve been unsure about people and their veris haven’t filled me with confidence that they won’t turn up with some 6ft bloke and try and do me something but when that feeling kicks in I trust my gut.

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By *sStephenPickleMan
4 weeks ago

Ends

If I’m not feeling the sex or the kissing I usually just make excuses.

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By *eltCuteMightDeleteWoman
4 weeks ago

Reading

Yes, several times.

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By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"No.

Haha! Careful with the heightism, not all 6 foot blokes are phychos

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By *erfHerder74Man
4 weeks ago

Inverclyde

I’ve invited people over for a coffee and a chat in the past, being clear just to chat and they become all hands and tongues then I felt like I had to because they wanted to.

I’ve stopped inviting people over, can meet in public now, which obviously none do

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By *eneralKenobiMan
4 weeks ago

North Angus

Every morning I’m pressured by having money in my bank account and going to work

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By *ongAndThick123Man
4 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

I’ve felt pressured, but I’m yet to give in to it.

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By *urvyLady4BlackMenWoman
4 weeks ago

Norwich

It makes me sad that so far the woman have all said yes.

I too have felt that.

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan
4 weeks ago

Norwich

"It makes me sad that so far the woman have all said yes.

I too have felt that. "

It makes me sad too. I don’t want to be that guy.

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By *idssissyTV/TS
4 weeks ago

Nr cricket ground birm

When felt pressured to do things on here usually ends in a block

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By *ellinever70Woman
4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"It makes me sad that so far the woman have all said yes.

I too have felt that. "

I'm a woman and I said no

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By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"It makes me sad that so far the woman have all said yes.

I too have felt that. "

Does that surprise you?

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By *hGlobbitsMan
4 weeks ago

Leeds

I once had a social with someone that wasn't going anywhere. I just didn't fancy her at all. The suspiciously faded and out of focus photos she'd sent me should have been a clue, really.

The conversation ran it's course, I finished my coffee and ended proceedings. I offered her a lift home because it was chucking it down and it was on my way. Seemed reasonable at the time. This, in hindsight, may have sent some mixed messages.

Ten minutes later, I found myself parked outside her house, trying unsuccessfully to evict her from my car while she aggressively demanded I come inside and submit to a blowjob. It's the only time I've ever found myself desperately trying to fend off an unwanted BJ. Deeply, deeply uncomfortable and embarrassing.

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By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Every morning I’m pressured by having money in my bank account and going to work "

First world problem. Millions of people around the globe would happily swap places with you.

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By *om and JennieCouple
4 weeks ago

Chams or Socials

"Not pressured but doing something I wasn't comfortable with to get out of a situation or felt obliged to? Sure.

I wouldnt now though, I've grown since then."

Same here - spookily was taking about the situation on Weds & how naive I was 10 years ago

J x

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By *vaRoseWoman
4 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork

Yes

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By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Not pressured but doing something I wasn't comfortable with to get out of a situation or felt obliged to? Sure.

I wouldnt now though, I've grown since then.

Same here - spookily was taking about the situation on Weds & how naive I was 10 years ago

J x"

I don’t think you need to be naive or immature to be subjected to pressure and unwanted persistence from guys who maybe seem really nice to the point you go along with something even if it’s just to get rid of them

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By *ustus5555Woman
4 weeks ago

Mansfield

To all the women that have replied with a " yes "

This is the main reason why I only ever used to meet with my hubby present, whether it be with a single f or a cpl. Yes it put quite a few ppl off meeting which is understandable, but that's not a problem to me.

I now only meet with ppl in a club environment & that seems to work better. X

Just my experience.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
4 weeks ago

Reading

No. I have in the past for sure but less so now. I protect my boundaries. But I'm a work in progress on this point as I am also a people pleaser.

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By *rinceless PrincessWoman
4 weeks ago

Gloucester

Yes

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By *vaRoseWoman
4 weeks ago

Ankh-Morpork

"To all the women that have replied with a " yes "

I now only meet with ppl in a club environment & that seems to work better. X

Just my experience. "

Oh I didn’t elaborate but I’m good at protecting my boundaries, however yes I have felt pressured and coerced here before. They don’t achieve what they want but they damn well try it anyway

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By *ayHaychMan
4 weeks ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)

Yes I have. But as someone else said, I have grown since then and can now advocate for myself.

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By *enk15Man
4 weeks ago

Evesham

Nope.

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By *ustus5555Woman
4 weeks ago

Mansfield

"To all the women that have replied with a " yes "

I now only meet with ppl in a club environment & that seems to work better. X

Just my experience.

Oh I didn’t elaborate but I’m good at protecting my boundaries, however yes I have felt pressured and coerced here before. They don’t achieve what they want but they damn well try it anyway "

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By *exyScientistsCouple
4 weeks ago

Castlebar

I've let myself be manipulated to a certain extent, sure. Put pressure on myself sometimes maybe more so than anyone else doing it. I'd be less inclined to be pressured by someone else.

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By *rHotNotts OP Man
4 weeks ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Are the ‘nice’ ones the worst?

I mean if someone’s a complete dick it must be fairly easy to say no & just bloc? if they seem like a really nice person with some nice veri's does that make it harder?

I think it’s different when it comes from women to men, guys worry about the unpredictability of a woman they say no to , and it’s very rare in my experience for a woman to pressure a man it’s only done out of sheer desperation or heartbreak normally. And then afterwards they feel really ashamed and stupid words I don’t think guys do I think for some guys it’s just their normal mode of operation.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
4 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Yes. They get blocked.

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By *ortney FoxxxWoman
4 weeks ago

honeysuckle lane

Yes

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By *avinaTVTV/TS
4 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Are the ‘nice’ ones the worst?

I mean if someone’s a complete dick it must be fairly easy to say no & just bloc? if they seem like a really nice person with some nice veri's does that make it harder?

It does make it harder. There's disappointment in the mix too, that you've been suckered by their presentable demeanour. You just have to be ruthless and block the buggers.

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By *weetiepie99Woman
4 weeks ago

cardiff

No, never.

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By *ineapple_turnoverCouple
4 weeks ago

London

"I've let myself be manipulated to a certain extent, sure. Put pressure on myself sometimes maybe more so than anyone else doing it. I'd be less inclined to be pressured by someone else. "

I think this probably sums up how Mrs P would feel, she puts pressure on herself to go along with things that maybe she's uncomfortable about. More so when she was younger but I'd say it still happens occasionally.

To the post above, yes she finds it harder to let nice guys down, if they're total dicks then it feels less of an issue.

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By *exyInLatinMan
4 weeks ago

Warsop

Unfortunately it seems to be the way of the world where there are people out there that try and take advantage of others in lots of different ways.

I think one of the things I have tried to get better at is spotting it, I don’t always get it right but i try.

Having tools and techniques for dealing with it in a way you feel comfortable with is very important and i would say vital before meeting anyone in here for sure

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By *ackformore100Man
4 weeks ago

Tin town

There's been a few threads like this which are pretty much about how grown adults interact with eachother. It seems a bit like if we don't get exactly what we want, or things don't go exactly as we planned in our heads or soneone does something we don't like it's an issue. It's like we have become unable to navigate interactions with other people safely and happily. Sometimes things don't go our way but no big deal, talk, sort it out if you choose to, or walk away of you choose to... We make an informed decision to meet with someone. We bear half of the responsibility of how that interaction flows. And of course we are permanently learning how we achieve better outcomes.

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By *exyScientistsCouple
4 weeks ago

Castlebar

"Are the ‘nice’ ones the worst?

I mean if someone’s a complete dick it must be fairly easy to say no & just bloc? if they seem like a really nice person with some nice veri's does that make it harder?

Definitely this.

Some guys are good at knowing what to say, but there are always red flags if you are looking for them.

And I totally get that guys are too cautious about letting women know they aren't interested or have lost interest. But again, plenty of signs to demonstrate that. Being strung along is not pleasant. Easier just to cut ties.

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By *porty_and_NaughtyCouple
4 weeks ago

Swansea

"No.

Haha! Careful with the heightism, not all 6 foot blokes are phychos

It's a strange saying isn't it? At 6'2" I know I'm objectively a bit taller than average but it's never ever made me feel safer. I hear people say about "a six foot bloke" and wonder why that height means anything - in my experience shorter men are on the whole more aggressive. However, when I'm around men who are taller than me (which in Wales isn't often) it can feel intimidating. This has got me wondering if this is how shorter men feel regularly and if this explains the aggression?

Trying to really understand how others feel is so difficult, there's so much stuff about ourselves that we just assume is the same for everyone but the older I get, the more I realise this isn't so and how much of a difference questioning these assumptions makes.

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By *porty_and_NaughtyCouple
4 weeks ago

Swansea

"It makes me sad that so far the woman have all said yes.

I too have felt that. "

If it helps, I have definitely felt it as a bloke. I'm very bad at saying no.

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By *an662021Man
4 weeks ago

ribble valley

Shagging a mates wife in front of him for the first time , plenty of pressure to perform well.

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By *ad NannaWoman
4 weeks ago

East London

I didn't feel pressured as I told them my thoughts on their behaviour, and we were in busy public places, but I have had men try to get me to do things on socials that weren't acceptable.

I told them straight to stop, or it's not happening so stop talking about it.

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By *olvesxcoupleCouple
4 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

Yes. Pressured for socials and repeat meets. Weve not given in to the pressure though. Just puts us off them more.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
4 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

No. Many have asked. The answer has always been no.

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By *weetWithATw1stWoman
4 weeks ago

MiddleofMyStreet

Simple answer... yes... varies on the degree of the pressure... trying to get a "social" meet but clearly they want it to be social and then play... lately its trying to change my mind on the fact i now meet in clubs only. I go and see what happens. I wont arrange to meet anyone there (that is just another pressure)... asking me to meet them 1 on 1 even after a no trying to pursuade me they are a good guy etc....

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