FabSwingers.com forum: Do you talk about sexual interests before having sex?

Ends

When you’re meeting someone for the sex and to be the first time you’ve done it, do you discuss sexual interests or do you go with the flow?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *h3rry Bomb80Man
6 weeks ago

from mars

Yeah I whip up a contract …. 😄

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ellinever70Woman
6 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I make them aware of my no goes and that's about it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *dnxyzMan
6 weeks ago

LondonX

Got to have an idea

But the moment dictates what we do and how

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aizyWoman
6 weeks ago

west midlands

I draw diagrams.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hristopherd999Man
6 weeks ago

Brentwood

Powerpoint presentation

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *thfloorCouple
6 weeks ago

Hove

Very dependent on how many people involved and how much deviation from the "norm". Generally the better outcomes IME are with people who can verbalise what they most want, and for us to make a rough plan if more than two are involved. But not so much you go into wanking fantasy territory 😅

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ripfillMan
6 weeks ago

Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant

When I am professionally Massaging for well being or sexual pleasure … I do go through a menu of delight on the first meet so that the lady is comfortable relaxed and zoned in on what is likely to happen

It’s important to gain trust

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ora the explorerWoman
6 weeks ago

Paradise, Herts

"I make them aware of my no goes and that's about it"

This

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *herrybakewellCouple
6 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Absolutely. Its how we check compatibility.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sleWightCoupleCouple
6 weeks ago

Ryde

Well, if they are interested in us, they've generally been swung by the fetish side of things on the profile, anyway. No need to discuss.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hechonkyduoCouple
6 weeks ago

Café Leblanc, Stourbridge

We give the lowdown on boundaries and then go with the flow

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emptme1993Man
6 weeks ago

Manchester

Yeah I like to, especially for anyone who has kinks and fantasy’s I can help with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hortieWoman
6 weeks ago

Northampton

I am right now.. even before we're planning the first social lol

Gotta let the poor bloke have a clue what he's in for... Innit.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ucka39Man
6 weeks ago

Newcastle

Discuss likes and dislikes so have something to consider so I know how I'm Going to play our precious time together

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hickthighs25Woman
6 weeks ago

Stockton

I make them act it out on video call with me beforehand get them to stand on there head and stuff to see if they meet my requirements a bit like an audition i guess

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
6 weeks ago

little house on the praire

Yes, likes and dislikes but not a complete breakdown of what's going to happen

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uffolkcouple-bi onlyCouple
6 weeks ago

Between Sudbury n Haverhill

We always spell out our boundaries even though they are written on our profile

Mrs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
6 weeks ago

Compatibility and likes / dislikes are normally figured out in messaging and chatting in the previous week's

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inger_SnapWoman
6 weeks ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Yes, it's really important to discuss likes/dislikes and put in place and boundaries 😊

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issmorganWoman
6 weeks ago

Calderdale innit

Yes, I'd always expect to chat about what we both expect and what's off limits etc.

If not, how will we know when it comes to it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aturefunswTV/TS
6 weeks ago

bristol

Well obviously do on sites like this x but prob didn’t in real time dating life x

And if I met “ the one “ on here wouldn’t necessarily expect monogamy nor any jealousy over each other’s past x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *JA1980Man
6 weeks ago

Ellesmere Port

I have a flow chart that I ask her to memorise beforehand, timestamps down to the second and a 25 question examination (no multiple choice) and require 80% for a passing grade, no retakes

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *midnight-Woman
6 weeks ago

...

Yes - sexual interests and limits are discussed.... Along with sexual health results+ condoms

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hickthighs25Woman
6 weeks ago

Stockton

"I have a flow chart that I ask her to memorise beforehand, timestamps down to the second and a 25 question examination (no multiple choice) and require 80% for a passing grade, no retakes"

🤣🤣🤣🤣 i like this

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oeBeansMan
6 weeks ago

Derby

Nothing too in depth, to be honest. Just any boundaries and and any specific likes.

I find if you get into the we*ds of it, it can quickly become a checklist to tick off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *JA1980Man
6 weeks ago

Ellesmere Port

[Removed by poster at 21/06/25 19:28:20]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *JA1980Man
6 weeks ago

Ellesmere Port

"I have a flow chart that I ask her to memorise beforehand, timestamps down to the second and a 25 question examination (no multiple choice) and require 80% for a passing grade, no retakes

🤣🤣🤣🤣 i like this "

Get the feeling you'd struggle to get even 50% though unfortunately 😜

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *estructionDollyWoman
6 weeks ago

The Deep Dark Woods

General likes, dislikes and hard limits usually. If we meet again we will go into more depth.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ancashireredheadWoman
6 weeks ago

Up North

"General likes, dislikes and hard limits usually. If we meet again we will go into more depth. "

Similar approach, it’s important to find some common ground prior. I’m more likely to delve deeper into it on a second meet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eltCuteMightDeleteWoman
6 weeks ago

Reading

If I’m really curious, I have a sex compatibility quiz (I’m serious)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hickthighs25Woman
6 weeks ago

Stockton

"I have a flow chart that I ask her to memorise beforehand, timestamps down to the second and a 25 question examination (no multiple choice) and require 80% for a passing grade, no retakes

🤣🤣🤣🤣 i like this

Get the feeling you'd struggle to get even 50% though unfortunately 😜"

I know gutted 🤷‍♀️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lice AgainTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Bristol

It's generally pretty well established before I walk through the door.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rinceless PrincessWoman
6 weeks ago

Gloucester

I have usually discussed limits etc before we get to meet face to face. However sometimes things happen in the moment and as long as everyone is comfortable i go with the flow

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ildTimes.Man
6 weeks ago

Wherever I May Roam

I just ask which of the 4 holes they're ok with 🥪

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
6 weeks ago

Den of Iniquity

"I just ask which of the 4 holes they're ok with 🥪"

Or in which order 🤷🏻‍♂️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *thfloorCouple
5 weeks ago

Hove

"I just ask which of the 4 holes they're ok with 🥪"

Wait what's the 4th hole 😆

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oonbath89Man
5 weeks ago

radstock

I think it’s good to know each other boundaries and then the rest takes care of itself

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aybeLadyWoman
5 weeks ago

West Dublin

Absolutely. Nothing worse than someone who doesnt like the same things sexually to you.

But at the end of the day, the only way of really knowing is by doin' the deed!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ildTimes.Man
5 weeks ago

Wherever I May Roam

"I just ask which of the 4 holes they're ok with 🥪

Wait what's the 4th hole 😆"

Only the seasoned pros know 😂🥪

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eyond PurityCouple
5 weeks ago

Lincolnshire

We get the formation and tactics board out so everyone knows their positions when we swap around…👀

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittlebirdWoman
5 weeks ago

The Big Smoke

"When you’re meeting someone for the sex and to be the first time you’ve done it, do you discuss sexual interests or do you go with the flow?"

Absofuckinglutely I do. It’s part of a good conversation being open about likes and dislikes. And not in a porn sense either. More of what the turn ons and turn offs are for each other 😘

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
5 weeks ago

Brought up some sex stuff before, yes- mutual shared interests, dislikes, any hard boundaries (always), sexual health. I prefer going with the flow and I don't really enjoy the scripted nonsense. Always makes my vagina dry up.

I like being organic but... well things like boundaries are really important to me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hortieWoman
5 weeks ago

Northampton

I like my pickles extra spicy. 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *randMrs397Couple
5 weeks ago

durham

Very clear on what is out of bounds but other than that go with the flow works for us.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ilverjagMan
5 weeks ago

swansea

Just like most so far, likes and dislikes usually forms part of conversation beforehand in order to establish comparability and ensure boundaries are respected.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *peedyGMan
5 weeks ago

Telford

Yes, just a basic chat about what each other like and more importantly don't like.... it would save any unnecessary awkwardness in the moment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inAndTonic21Couple
5 weeks ago

Merseyside

Tend to have done that beforehand in chat tbh

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avid 50Man
5 weeks ago

kendal

always chat before hand , probably not as important for you younger people but when you're more mature and your meeting mature people there are things that you need to chat about, positions that a lady might find difficult and things that she doesn't like,

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ifty and shiftyWoman
5 weeks ago

Callington

My profile is quite specific anyway, but I like to have a "discovery" conversation.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ewtfaceMan
5 weeks ago

Bracknell

I think having an outline plan is good for both, especially if going into more off piste practices

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orphia2003Woman
5 weeks ago

Tonypandy.

Need to be aware of likes and limits, but generally go with the flow, unless we have discussed something specific.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *dalisqueWoman
5 weeks ago

land of make believe

The first time I have sex with someone I like it to be an organic,fluid,natural experience,definitely not something planned out.

Apart from fairly innocent flirting I don't discuss sex ,fantasies,desires in any great length or detail etc until after that first time.

I enjoy the anticipation of the first time & feel that not having it all mapped out adds to it.

I also couldn't bear the pressure on either if us of having boxes to tick because someone had mentioned a certain sex act or turn on they liked.

Also discussing intimate details of myself with someone I don't really know,really doesn't do it for me.

🩵

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *egnMaxCouple
5 weeks ago

Nottingham

First we flirt with likes, dislikes and boundaries.

Then the flow is made for going with.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nalleesaMan
5 weeks ago

Birkenhead

"I draw diagrams."
lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
5 weeks ago

East London

I like to know what they don't do, and to let them know what I don't.

I don't like overly sexual conversations before I meet someone, or it feels like we've already had sex and the excitement of meeting someone new isn't there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imply_SensualMan
5 weeks ago

Cheshire

I talk about the things I like and dont like, but not in a phone sex kind of way, an open discussion to make sure we are compatible enough to meet.

You can still get a general feel about things without going into too much detail so there is still an element of 'going with the flow' on the night.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *odgerMooreMan
5 weeks ago

Rummage Up The Jumper

Probably when we have made a connection in messaging - i’d ask what they find attractive… or something which opens up a conversation to discuss likes/dislikes so from the point you meet you know touching her feel will get you kicked not kissed. But not graphic details… the rest you can learn by listening to responses … ‘on the job’ training

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *odgerMooreMan
5 weeks ago

Rummage Up The Jumper

"Probably when we have made a connection in messaging - i’d ask what they find attractive… or something which opens up a conversation to discuss likes/dislikes so from the point you meet you know touching her feel will get you kicked not kissed. But not graphic details… the rest you can learn by listening to responses … ‘on the job’ training

Feet ffs not feel - bloody autocarrot!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread